Monstrous (12 page)

Do they not realize they are no match for me? Or does being in the wizard's thrall make them determined to thwart me? Perhaps only the few remaining wish to try.

I pull a vial from my belt and toss it in the midst of them. One guard hovers over a girl, and looks up as I drop down to the floor. He tries to yell, but it only comes out as a strangled whisper. The others slump in their chairs as the mist overtakes their senses.

The nearest girl succumbs to the sleep, coughing as she rolls over. She is a small slip of a thing with an angry rash creeping up her neck, but I like the look of her nonetheless. Tonight, I will save her.

I SWING BY MY GARDEN TO PLUCK A COUPLE OF ROSES SPECKLED WITH
gleaming dewdrops. Then I head straight into the tower. I hope the girls like them as much as I do, though they have barely done more than sleep and cower from me. At the very least, the roses will brighten the space. I thrust open the door to the tower room and arrange the flowers in the small vase I have set up on a side table. Light from the windows streams in through the curtains, illuminating the two sleeping figures with blankets tucked up around their ears and an empty bed.

I stop short. Only two girls sleep here. The one from last night is missing. I fly back down the stairs, blood pounding in my ears.

The wizard has found us.

But why would he take only one?

“Father! Father!” I scream. I must be sure he is safe. I must inform him of the missing girl immediately.

He wanders out of the cottage, his face creased with surprise and concern. “What is it, Kym? What is wrong?”

I land before him and throw my arms around his neck. “Father, the girl I rescued last night. She is gone!”

He pats my back, just between my wings. “Ah, I was hoping to catch you before you went to the tower.” He pries me off his neck and holds me at arm's length. My tears blur his form into silver streaks. “I am afraid the girl did not make it.”

“What do you mean?”

He leads me into the cottage and sits me by the fire. “Kymera, the wizard is very powerful. This girl was already so far gone, had already suffered so much at his hands. She did not survive the night.”

My entire body goes numb with the chill that creeps over me. “She is dead?” I whisper.

He nods, scratching Pippa's head.

“How?” I remember worrying over Ren, how pale and lifeless he was. “Did my sting kill her? Was it me?”

In the moment he hesitates before answering, I hear the truth he does not say. It
was
me. It was my fault. I killed her. Horror grips me in its cold, stinging embrace. I may be sitting by the fire, but even that blaze cannot warm me.

“No, of course not. It was the wizard. The wasting disease he cursed her with had wreaked havoc on her body. She would not have lasted much longer anyway.”

But I sped up the process. He will never admit that. Father does not wish me to be troubled by unhappy thoughts. But it is true.

My insides feel as though they've been hollowed out. That girl is gone because of me. She'll never see my roses or taste the freedom of Belladoma.

“Where is she now? May I say good-bye to her?”

Father startles. “Oh, Kym. I am sorry. Darrell already took her away. She will be buried in Belladoma, far from the wizard's reach. He will not be able to use her ever again.”

“She is already gone? Why would he take just one girl?”

Father grimaces as though he ate a rotten egg for breakfast. “Most humans do not like to travel with the dead. It makes them uncomfortable.”

I stare at my hands, then glare at my tail. Both refuse to stop shaking.

“Should I only take the ones who are less sick, Father? So they do not die?” Another tear rolls down my face. I do not think I can stand it if it happens again.

“That might be for the best. Just to be safe.” He pats my head and hands me a bowl of porridge. “Eat. You need your strength for tonight.”

I pick at the porridge. I am not hungry in the least. All I can think of is that poor, small girl and her pale, yellow face. And Ren. I left him alone. I pray he is all right.

I have to wonder—if my sting affected that girl so adversely, could it hurt him, too? Or any of the other girls?

Injuring them is the last thing I want to do. Nor would Father. I watch him putter around the hearth. He soon
settles down with a book. Yes, Father would have taken precautions. My sting cannot truly injure; it only causes a deep sleep to fall over them. This unfortunate girl was an exception.

Still, worry for Ren pricks at my heart.

By the time I force down the gruel, I have made up my mind. I must make sure Ren is safe. I will seek him out tonight. I will talk to him. I will know him, like I never got to know that girl.

After lunch, Father left me by the fire reading my books to go to a market in a village beyond the forest and river. It is far enough away that he will not be back until I have left for Bryre and my nightly rescue.

Which means the afternoon is entirely mine.

I start out pruning my roses, trying to focus on the blossoms. But the lovely colors and sweet scent do not soothe me as they usually do. My mind feels scattered, unable to focus. The back of my neck tingles, and suddenly my vision is no longer my own.

Rose petals, my favorite blush ones, fall to a white marble floor. A shrill sound pierces the air and lingers like smoke. A woman slumps amid the petals but I cannot see her face. Just her golden hair and fine blue silk dress.

It is the woman whose image my mind conjured the first time I considered the word
mother
.

I want to reach out, to turn her and see her face, but the memory fades too quickly. It leaves only a loneliness that curls itself up next to my heart and makes itself at home.

Familiar surroundings are the last things I want now, but I hardly know where to flee.

I find myself wandering through the hedge and making my way toward the river. My thoughts rush like those waters.

I do not wish to be alone. I seek the solace of another creature who understands me and what I am.

A creature who called me
sister
. The word has been roaming through my brain ever since, almost as much as
mother
.

Did that girl who died last night have a mother who will miss her? Or a sister who shared her secrets? I would cherish all the girls like sisters, if only Father would let me. If only that little one had not died. If only I had some way to fix it. To bring her back.

An idea wafts through my head and solidifies more with every step. If the dragon finds me today, I know what I could ask. If I can find the courage.

I settle on the bank of the river, resting back in the soft green moss and dangling my legs in the water. I squint at the sun as the clouds make shapes in the bright blue sky. It feels so wrong that everything can be sunny and bright when I am hollow inside. That poor girl can no longer enjoy this. Nor will she ever see her family again, or run through the streets of Bryre. My chest tightens. Just like I will never see my mother—the woman in that memory—again. The broken pieces of my mind play a cruel trick as they sort themselves out, showing me glimpses of a past I can never recover.

Tears spill over my cheeks and onto the moss. I close my
eyes to stop the torrent, but my eyelids are useless to hold it back. I will flood the riverbanks if I do not stop soon.

A warm blast of dank air brushes across my face, chilling the drops on my cheeks.

Why do you cry, sister?

I scramble to my feet and come face to face with my rock dragon. Batu is just as humongous and magnificent as the first time, but now he seems less fearsome. His wings are furled close to his body, like a shimmering cloak. His scaly head, larger than my entire body, is bent close to the ground to keep me at eye level. I am so relieved to see him that I nearly burst into tears all over again.

“A girl died. I fear the fault is mine.”

The giant snout nudges my chin.
It is not your doing. Only the wizard goes around killing girls.

“I know, but I was trying to save her and I may have been overzealous.”

Sometimes, all you can do is try. Sometimes it is not enough. Neither is your fault.

I sink down on the bank again. From this vantage, the dragon blocks the sun from my line of vision and it surrounds him with a halo of glittering light. It is so lovely I wish to reach out and touch it.

But since I also wish to keep my hands, I refrain.

“My father brought me back with a spark of life. But he cannot bring the girl back because he used it all up on me.”

A sharp gust of dank air is my only response. I try to read the expression in the pale yellow eyes, but without success.

Your father did this? Do you know what he used?

I nod miserably. I do not like that a dragon had to cry for me to be reborn. “He told me dragons' tears are the most powerful and can bring people back to life.”

Batu's head rears back.
Where did he get this knowledge?

“From the markets, I think. That is where he finds these things. He uses his knowledge for good, for science. We only want to thwart the wizard—”

Your father plays with dangerous forces, sister.

I suck in my breath. “He knows what he is doing, and it is all for the good of Bryre. If I could tell him about you, we could all work together.”

Batu shakes his enormous head.
No, sister. We have a bond, a blood oath. You must not break it.

“I cannot break it even if I wanted to. Just thinking of doing so makes my tongue freeze.”

I am sorry. This is the only way for us to be safe. The wizard has eyes and ears everywhere.

“Father would be so kind to you, just like he is kind to the girls we free from Bryre.” The image of the poor child from last night vaults to the forefront of my mind, and my hands quiver. I was not half so kind as Father when I stung her. More than anything I wish I could take it back, undo what was done.

What exactly are you doing with the girls from Bryre? Has the city become so corrupt that they require rescuing?

“The wizard sent a curse into the city that sickens the girls. They have to be quarantined to contain the spread of the disease, but the wizard steals them from the hospital and imprisons them. Each night I sneak into the city to free the
girls and bring them to Father. He has a cure for the disease, and we keep them safe and hidden.” I clench my fists. “Soon, we'll find that wizard, and we'll make sure he'll never harm another girl again.”

Your father cures them, does he? Intriguing. Not many men would go to such lengths for strangers.

Pride blooms in my chest. “My father is not most men.”

Batu flaps his wings as he settles back onto his haunches, yellow eyes considering me.

Sister, if I could give you my tears to bring the girl back, I would. But I fear I cannot. They have all been spent weeping over my fallen brothers and sisters.

This beast is truly a mind reader. I have been dying to ask, but could not find the nerve. It did not seem right. “You cannot cry for a human child?”

You can only cry so much until your life is wept away.

My tears spring forth again, shattering the glittering image before me. My faint hope of catching up to Darrell and the girl withers. I brush the tears away.

“What happened to your brothers and sisters?” I ask. I cannot help but wonder about this dragon and how he came to be as lonely as I am.

The wizard happened.
He huffs, air ruffling the waves of the river.
Once, rock dragons filled the mountain range.
Batu flicks his tail in the direction of the peaks.
Fire dragons nested in volcanoes, water dragons in rivers, and nearly invisible air dragons in the clouds. The rock dragons and water dragons lived in harmony with men, though the air dragons kept to themselves and fire dragons had too hot a temper. But then men discovered they
could take our magic by killing us. The power corrupted them, making them greedy for more. Our numbers dwindled and the men who had become wizards began to fight among themselves, killing each other to gain more power. By that time, my clan had only a dozen members left. We roamed across all these lands and ones far away, keeping on the move. But the wizards picked us off, until there was only a single wizard. Always hunting, always chasing.

Anger flares up my neck. I
hate
that wizard.

Batu exhales again, curling his wings around his body.
I do not know what became of the other wizards. They either fled from that one's power, or he consumed them in his greed. One wizard was more than enough. I was the youngest in my clan, a mere draglet when we were first on the run. Sometimes we remained in one place for years, other times only days. Each time, the others protected me, so I could escape. Until the last time. My sister fought the wizard, and when I tried to help her, she brought the mountain down around them to keep me out and give me time to flee.