More Than Her (18 page)

Because if he needed to know that it was okay for him to kiss me, then I'd
show
him.

The second our tongues met, he let out a low groan. His hand on my back moved lower, and lower, until it was under my shorts, and under my panties, cupping my bare ass. "Mm," he moaned, never taking his mouth off mine.

I started to untuck his shirt from his. I wanted to touch him too. I wanted to touch him everywhere. I wanted to feel him
everywhere
.

His mouth never stopped moving and our tongues never stopped playing. It was slow and soft, but he was in full control.

I lost mine the minute he looked at me with lust clear in his eyes.

He pressed further into my center and I felt him again, rock hard against my core.

He started a rhythm, grinding into me. One of my legs was on the floor, the other wrapped around him. I started moving too. And slowly, we started moving together. "Oh God, Logan." I kissed him harder, softy biting his bottom lip.

His mouth moved from mine, down to my jaw, to my neck, to my collarbone. He slowly ran his tongue along there, lower, and lower, until he reached my chest.

"Oh, shit," I whispered. I was panting, moaning, moving, gripping, all of it, all at once. My nails dug into his back. "Oh, shit," I said again. I had no control over what came out of my mouth when he did these things to me.

He gripped my ass tighter. I let out a sound I had no idea I was capable of. I was so fucking turned on. His movements on me were making me so fucking wet I could feel it soaking my panties. His mouth moved from my neck to me ear, "You gotta quit making those sounds, baby." He kissed the spot behind it. "I'm starting to lose it."

Then he took my mouth in his, moving into me harder, pinning me to the wall. My leg on the floor moved to wrap around him. I needed him closer to me; I needed
more
of him
.

He started to build a rhythm again. I felt that slow burn building low in my stomach. I didn't know how the fuck he was doing it. Or what the fuck he was even doing. But I didn't want it to stop. Ever. "Oh my God, Logan." I was panting; my head threw back against the wall. He was on my neck. Sucking. Hard. He was going to leave a mark. I wanted him to.

"Matthews! What the fuck are you doing?" A deep voice yelled.

I screamed, dropped my legs, ducked, and hid behind him.

Oh. My. God.

Reality set in.

What the fuck were we doing?

"Fuck," he spat. His hand went down his pants to adjust himself, before turning around.

"What the fuck do you think this is, Matthews?"

"Sorry, Coach."

Oh. My. God.

Kill me now.

"Go home!" I was too embarrassed to look past Logan to see his coach's reaction.

"Yes Sir." Logan sounded like he was about to laugh.

What the hell?

"I'll cover for you." His coach sounded different now, like he was trying to contain his own laughter. "Fuck, I wish I was in college again," he said, before I heard his footsteps walking away.

I don't know what emotion was on my face when Logan turned to me, but he laughed.

Fucking laughed.

"This shit's not funny!" I whispered loudly. "I almost let you
have
me." I motioned with my finger at our surroundings. "Right here!"

He didn't respond. Just looked me up and down and licked his lips. His eyes settled on my face, as he brought his hand up to cup my cheek.

And then his face was so close to mine; I could feel his breath on my lips. He rubbed his nose against mine. "Wait here," he said, his voice low, laced with desire. "We're not even close to being done. I'm going to take you home and I'm going to fucking finish what I started. And when I'm done with you, you won't even remember what happened just now. All you'll remember is how I make you feel when you're screaming my name."

Logan

She hadn't said a word since we started driving home. I couldn't even glance at her long enough to figure out what she was feeling because the rain was so heavy I could barely see a foot in front of the car.

"I can't see shit," I told her, wiping the windshield with my sleeve.

She stayed silent.

I slowed down enough so that could look at her quickly. Her eyes were shut tight and she was gripping the sides of the seat so tight her knuckles turned white. Her face was pale. I could see her chest heaving from her erratic breathing.

What the hell?

I was about to ask if she was okay when her phone sounded.

My concentration went back to the road, but I heard her answer. "Hey," she greeted.

"Yeah, I was on my way home...."

"Logan's driving..."

"Okay, hang on..."

To me, she said, "E wants to talk to you, I'll put it on speaker."

The next sound was Ethan's voice. "Dude, can you pull over somewhere safe?"

I did as he asked, took the phone off speaker and put it to my ear. I never took my eyes off Amanda.

"What's up?" I said into the phone.

"How is she?"

Her feet were on the seat, her knees drawn up, her head between them. "What's going on?"

"She just...has a thing...with this weather." He spoke cautiously. "Could you just stay put until the weather clears?"

"Sure." I hung up, put her phone in the console and stroked the hair gently. "Amanda?"

She made a sound but didn't look up.

I don't know what the hell was going on, but it was more that just being afraid of rain.

A crack of thunder sounded. She flinched and started rocking back and forth.

I leaned over and tried to get her to calm down. I tried to hold her but she wouldn't stop rocking. "Baby, " I said.

That single word made her look up at me. She was crying. "I'm such a fucking baby." She sniffed.

"No, you're not." I soothed. "Come here."

I helped her so she was lying on top of me. I loved feeling her this close. It wasn't a sex thing, not all the time, sometimes I just want
her
. I moved the hair that'd fallen in front of her face to behind her ear. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

She shook her head. "I want to, Logan. Just not now."

I nodded and kissed her cheek before lowering my seat to a laying position. I got us comfortable while we waited out the storm. Honestly though, I could lay like this, with her in my arms forever, and it still wouldn't be long enough.

"I hate this," I told her.

"What?" She sniffed again.

"I hate seeing you like this; crying. I hate that you have to feel like this and I hate that I can't do shit about it."

Her head lifted from my neck. "You are doing something. You're here. That's something."

My hand started running through her hair. "It's not enough."

"It's more than I expected," she said, lowering her head to my chest.

Amanda

He put his free hand on the small of my back, and that's how we stayed, with his arms wrapped around me, his fingers in my hair, my head on his chest, and my heart in his hands.

Minutes went by before I felt his hand that was stroking my hair begin to slow, and his breathing evened out.

He'd fallen asleep.

I lifted my head slowly, hoping not to wake him.

And I looked at him.

And I forget where I am, and how I got here. I forget the storm outside, and all the memories associated with it. Because all I feel is
him.
 
I watched as his chest slowly rises and falls, his hair
—
that perfect mess, his lips slightly parted as his breath blew in and out.

My gaze lingered on his lips longer than it should, but I don't kiss him. Instead, I lay my head back down and let his rhythmic breathing lull me into my own slumber.

***

I get jolted awake by the ringing of my phone. It surprised me so much that I jumped and hit my head on the roof of Logan's car.

He was already chuckling as his hand soothed where my head just hit. "It's Ethan," he said, handing me my phone.
 

***
 

By the time we get home, the rain had stopped and the sun was out. We didn't talk about what happened in the stadium, and we didn't discuss my crying in the car.

A bunch of Ethan's friends were in the living room watching the game, including James. James walked past us to go to the kitchen. "Amanda," he nodded in greeting. Then looked to Logan, his eyebrows bunched in confusion. I don't know if he knew Logan lived here, or if he suspected something else. "Matthews," he did the same head nod towards Logan.

"Asshole," Logan replied.

We waited for James to be done in the kitchen before going in; I sat up on the counter while he got out two bottles of water. He handed me one the same time Ethan walked in.

"You okay?" he asked, clearly concerned.

I smiled at him. "Uh huh."

Logan leaned back on the opposite counter, crossing his arms over his chest.

"You sure?" Ethan asked again. He's always been a good brother, and even though we're twins, he's always acted like an older one, a protector of sorts. He understands who I am and he puts up with my shit, even when I don't deserve it. But the summer after senior year, things changed. He became more than just my brother, he became my best friend.

"'I'm sure E, it's fine. Logan took care of me."

Logan choked on his water, then tried to contain his laugh. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve, while Ethan looked from me to him, a look of disgust clear on his face.

"I don't even want to know," E said, shaking his head. He continued, "So, you don't..." a slow smirk developed as he took a step closer. I was confused for a second before his arms come up. "You don't need a hug do you?"

My legs automatically kicked out in front of me. "No. Ew. Gross."

He started laughing, backing away.

"What's that about?" Logan said through his own laughter.

Great. My brother and my whatever-the-hell Logan was, both laughing at me.

"Dimmy hates being hugged. Ask Tyson. It was the one thing he
didn't
love about her."

My face fell at the mention of his name. I could see Logan watching me from the corner of my eye. I knew what his next question was going to be. I mentally prepared myself for it.

Ethan left the room.

And then it was deadly silent.

I kept my eyes trained to the floor. I saw him take the few steps until he was right in front of me. He separated my legs so he could stand between them. Then he placed both hands on the counter either side of me.

I never looked up.

I waited.

And I waited.

"So," he said, his voice low. "You hate being hugged?"

Not the question I was expecting. I couldn't help but smile as my eyes moved up to meet his. I nodded once.

His arms went around my waist. Mine moved on their own until they rest on his shoulders. His smile matched mine. He pulled me closer.

"I would have never guessed," he whispered in my ear. Then he rubbed his nose along my jaw until his mouth was aligned with mine. "I must be special," he said into my mouth, right before he kissed me.

And I lose myself.

In his hold.

In his kiss.

I completely lose myself in Logan Matthews.

He started to pull away, but came back in for a few more chaste kisses. I giggled into his mouth.

He rubbed his palms up and down my bare legs. "What are we doing tonight?" he asked.

"
We
are doing nothing.
I
am going to work."

He threw his head back, frustrated.

"But," I continued. "I have tomorrow day and the next day completely free, but I have to work tomorrow night."

"I have practice in the morning, and then I'm free the rest of the day." He paused, thinking. "And the next day too."

He backed away and left the kitchen.

I knew he was lying, but I didn't care. Right now, I couldn't think of anything I wanted more than him.

Logan

Clearly whoever the fuck that Tyson asshole was
—
he wasn't holding her right.

Logan

Amanda got a ride to work from a friend. A non-Tony friend.

The guys ended up leaving as soon as the game was done and some girl came over, I didn't see her, I just heard her heels as she walked into the house. They went straight to Ethan's room without saying a word. I stayed on the sofa and studied.