Mr. Darcy and the Secret of Becoming a Gentleman (39 page)

Later when Elizabeth awoke from the slumber they had both drowsily fallen into after their lovemaking, she found herself in Darcy's arms with her back resting against his chest. Upon seeing that she was no longer asleep, he began to trace circles on her exposed hip. Once his ministrations began to tickle, she took his hand and wove his fingers in hers. “I cannot believe we are still abed. What time is it?”

“It is barely eleven o'clock, and we have no plans.” After furrowing his brow for a moment, he added, “Unless, of course, you wish to go somewhere? Or need some time on your own?”

Hearing the apprehension in his voice, she quickly replied, “No, there is nowhere else on earth that I would rather be. This has been bliss, rest assured. But I cannot help but wonder what the staff must think. I am the new mistress of the house, and I have not even risen from my bed.”

“Elizabeth, the staff thinks that it is your honeymoon and most likely properly believes that I am holding you hostage. If there was talk, and Mrs. Larsen takes prodigious care that there is none, the staff would simply blame me, and quite frankly, I couldn't care less. At worst, they will whisper that I am besotted with you, and nothing could be truer.”

“I suppose you are right. I think that I am probably just feeling guilty. This has all been so glorious. I cannot imagine that I should be allowed so much happiness.”

“Elizabeth, you deserve all the happiness in the world, and I want nothing other than to make your life perfect.”

“Dearest, that is hardly possible, but I appreciate that you would wish it so.” After a pause, Elizabeth said, “Fitzwilliam, earlier you expressed some discomfort over the events of yesterday. I know that such a prolonged social gathering was not to your tastes, but I do hope you enjoyed yourself somewhat.”

“Madam, I have sorely misrepresented myself if you can think that I thought yesterday anything other than the most important day of my life. We were married yesterday. Therefore, the day was perfection.”

“I appreciate the lovely sentiment, but I cannot believe that you enjoyed being so much on display. I think I feel far more at home in social gatherings than you do, especially one held in Hertfordshire, and yet the day was too much even for me.”

Darcy turned on his side to face her and said, “No, you are right, my dear. I was anxious to leave, to have you here to myself, but I still enjoyed the day. I particularly found Reverend Fischer's words a comfort. I thought his message about the ties our marriages were creating between and amongst our families was a very important one. However, it was his admonition that we were also creating a new family for which my primary responsibility lay that made me understand the solemnity of the ceremony and helped me to put some of my family's actions into perspective. His words captured how I felt and gave me strength throughout the day to make small talk with absolutely anyone who sought to remind me how lucky I was to have wed you.”

“Sometimes, sir, I am not sure if you are teasing me or not.”

“It is a skill I learned from you, my dear. I hope to remain an enigma so that you might always be interested in me.”

“I think it is safe to say that I will remain interested even if, by chance, I should somehow come to understand you.”

With a gentle kiss, he replied, “Then that shall be my comfort.”

Smiling sweetly, Elizabeth replied, “I am glad. But, sir, I do think that it is time for us to rise, or am I still being held hostage?”

“I see no reason why both cannot be true. Let me see about a bath, and then I will apprise you of my plans.”

While they did remain in their room for most of the first day, they eventually emerged for dinner. As they sat at their table, which had been formally outfitted for a special meal, they were free to discuss whatever they wanted and to lean ever closer or touch hands whenever the whim moved them. The realization that once their dinner was over he could take Elizabeth with him back to their room made it the most enjoyable meal Darcy had ever spent.

Despite his newfound appreciation for the dining room, Darcy insisted on having breakfast delivered to their bedroom all week. The practice allowed Elizabeth to begin to understand her husband's tastes. Mornings tended to make him ravenous both for his breakfast and for her.

Once the week was up and visiting could begin, their time no longer seemed their own, as an unending stream of guests began to descend upon them. At first, Darcy took it in stride, but he soon resented the interruption. Propriety required Elizabeth to accept the calls and even return several of the visits. Moreover, Darcy's business and estate concerns soon needed his attention as well. Elizabeth could no longer recall whether it was by design or circumstance that they began to make their mornings together their private sanctuary. Calls were never accepted before eleven, and visitors soon realized it was futile to try. Darcy's steward quickly learned that while his master would spend long hours on the care of his estate, he was not to be bothered before mid-morning unless it was an emergency.

This demarcation of time gave Darcy a better way to manage his duties and also an opportunity to discuss his business with Elizabeth before his appointments. Her insights often gave him clarity and helped organize his thoughts. Their discussions sometimes led to disagreements, but none ever lasted for very long.

After they arrived at Pemberley, at Darcy's prodding Elizabeth ordered the refurbishing of several rooms. It was then that Darcy suggested a novel use for his bedroom. He argued that it could be more efficiently used as a private sitting room with a small dining table than a suite where he would never sleep. He wanted to continue their morning interludes, but he was tiring of breakfast on trays. Pemberley was a vastly larger house than their home in London, and the dining room was too far to go to before dressing. Because he wanted to eat breakfast in the leisurely manner they had done in London, but wanted a larger variety of hot foods, he suggested that his room be transformed into a small dining room with a sideboard where hot foods could be left warming. That way, when they wanted breakfast, the food would be there and they could wait on themselves.

At first Elizabeth simply laughed at his idea. She could not believe that she had once thought Darcy formal and stiff. He was more at home defying convention. She thought his idea had merit but could imagine the gossip it might cause. Darcy pointed out that no one would ever be invited into the master's bedroom. Therefore, no one would ever know of the renovations except his trusted staff, and they knew better than to gossip in such a manner. In the end, Elizabeth acquiesced, and his suite became their private breakfast room, with a settee and two writing desks.

Elizabeth was roused from her thoughts by the arrival of her maid with another missive.

After she had finished dressing, Darcy entered. “Elizabeth, everything is prepared. We can depart at your leisure. I know you must be looking forward to seeing your family again.”

“I am,” she brightly replied. “I was just thinking about our wedding and the last time I saw them all together. Since then, Jane and Bingley's visits have been such a comfort, and my father's sojourn last month was as enjoyable as it was unexpected. But I must admit to wanting to see Longbourn again and my whole family. It will be odd, though, to visit as a guest.”

“I imagine it might be, but I suppose that is to be expected.”

“Yes, but it has made me wonder if you might also be feeling some apprehension. I know my family can sometimes be overwhelming, and to be honest, I fear that they might not all value you as they should.”

Sitting next to her, he took her hand and said, “If that is true, it is most likely the results of my prior actions.” After pausing to think, he added, “In returning to Hertfordshire, I cannot help being reminded of my trip there last year, when I came to speak to Jane. I was also worried over what reception I might receive, but by finally focusing on someone else's concern over my own, I was able to begin to fulfill my obligations as a gentleman, and that ultimately led to your reevaluation of my worth. I cannot hope for similar transformations, but my goals this trip are more modest. I would simply like your family to understand our devotion and begin to forge friendships where I have previously been unsuccessful.”

Smiling, she took his face in her hands and kissed him. “While I will be forever grateful that you did in fact return to Hertfordshire, and despite what I might have improvidently once said, I think that in essentials you have always acted the gentleman.” Smiling, she added, “At different times, it has just been easier for others to see.”

Laughing, he replied, “Your defense of my earlier behavior may actually serve as the basis for its indictment. But I appreciate the sentiment all the more.” Pulling her to stand in his embrace, he added, “But whatever apprehension either of us possess, delaying the start of our journey will not improve its ultimate success.”

“Yes, you are, of course, correct, and I will prepare to depart directly, but you must promise to let me know if my family proves disconcerting. We have both come to value our time alone, and being so much in company may be a difficult accommodation.”

“I appreciate that, but as long as we can retire to the privacy of our room together at Netherfield, I think I will be able to bear the change sufficiently well.”

Elizabeth suddenly frowned. “I trust that will be true, but I just received a letter from Jane saying that our visit may coincide with Bingley's sisters'. It is not yet certain, but if it is, I fear that Netherfield may not be quite the refuge we may have imagined.”

“Oh,” he stammered, considering the implications. “That is… I did not realize.”

Smiling at his unease and the value he obviously placed on their time alone together, she said, “But do not be overly concerned. It is not certain, and in any regard, this entire trip is of limited duration. We will enjoy the company of our friends and family, and then we will return to the comfort of Pemberley. Whenever I feel some impatience over a social obligation because I would rather have you all to myself, I endeavor to remember that we have a full lifetime together. Inconveniences, joys, sorrow, absurdities, and tribulations will all come and go, but we will remain. No matter what comes, we will have each other, and that is our blessing. And now, I think, we should begin the journey.”

The End

I want to thank Marsha Zierk for encouraging me to write before I even started and thereafter always offering her support and encouragement without reserve. I want to thank Abigail Reynolds for inspiring me to write by sharing her own wonderful books and for introducing me to my talented editor, Deb Werksman. I want to thank everyone at Sourcebooks for being supportive and helpful, and for being a wonderful place to grow in creativity. And, finally, I want to offer my ultimate thanks to Jane Austen for offering us all such a vivid world between the covers of her books that our imaginations can live a lifetime within them.

Maria Hamilton is a graduate of Harvard Law School and is an attorney in Boston. Her interests include travel, politics, the Red Sox, bicycling, and a random succession of hobbies that allow her to express her creative passion. She is perpetually learning Italian and hopes one day to attempt a complete conversation. She lives in New Hampshire with her husband and two children.