Murder & Mayhem in Goose Pimple Junction (33 page)

“
Jack this is
very
cool.”

He
was quiet for a moment and then said with a sly smile, “Back there in the yard—did you say, ‘Dadnamit? And golldernit?’”

* * *

They arrived at The Silly Goose and found Martha Maye and Henry Clay already at a table.

“
Hi y’all!” Martha Maye exclaimed. “Idn’t this fun?!”

“
It is indeed, Martha Maye! Hi Henry Clay, how are you?” Tess asked.

“
I’m finer than frog hair split four ways, thank ye. Hire y’all?”

“
We’re great.” Jack rubbed his hands together as he sat down.

“
Well, come on, spill it! Why are you smilin’ like a goat in a briar patch?” Henry Clay looked from Jack to Tess.

“
Because of the sweet ride out in the parking lot.” Jack’s eyes danced and twinkled.

“
What sweet ride?”

“
A 1954 Chevy 3100 pickup truck, in pristine condition. Only
seventy thousand original miles on it.” Jack was almost jumping up and down in his chair with excitement.

“
I gotta see this! Ladies, will you ‘scuse us?” The two men wound through the tables and out the door to the parking lot.

“
Well?” Martha Maye asked. “Did you talk to Crate Marshall?”

“
Tank. He prefers to be called Tank. And yes, we did.”

“
Tank? What kind of fool name is that?”

“
Well, I’m just guessing, but I’d say it’s because of the way he looks. The man does kind of resemble a tank. He’s huge.”

“
So what’id he say?”

“
He confirmed that his grandfather was guilty in the bank robbery, and he said Brick was there…when your grandfather was murdered.”

“
Oh, gracious light.” Martha Maye sat back in her chair, as if the wind had been knocked out of her. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised, but it’s still somethin’ when you hear it out loud.”

“
I’m sorry, Martha Maye.” She patted her arm. “He said he thinks his grandfather spent all the stolen money bribing governors and judges. What a shame—so much heartache and pain for nothing. It’s so sad.” Tess looked around the restaurant and then added, “Would your mother know if either of the other two men connected with the bank robbery had family still living here?”

“
She might. Or Clive, or Earl, or even Buck might know.”

The
men made their way back to the table with Jack looking like he had springs in his shoes, and Henry Clay beside him, gesticulating wildly.

“
Well, she’s a beaut. I have to say I’m jealous,” Henry Clay said as they settled back down at the table. “What say we order? All’s I’ve had all day is a RC and a moon pie. I’m starvin’!”

When
the food came, everyone commented on the rareness of
Henry Clay’s steak. “I've seen cows hurt worse than that and get well,” Martha Maye said in disbelief.

“
That’s just the way I like it! The only time I get real meat is at McDonald’s, and it’s always overcooked.” Tess and Jack exchanged looks.

A
few minutes later, Henry Clay started coughing, and then he held his throat with a terrified look on his face. Martha Maye was talking a blue streak about her soon-to-be ex-husband, but she noticed him first.

“
Oh, m’gosh!” She stood up so fast she knocked her chair over. “He’s chokin’! Somebody do somethin’! Does anyone know the
Hemlock remover? Ohma gosh ohma gosh!”

Jack
jumped up, shouting, “Stand up, Henry Clay.” He grabbed him from behind, putting his left hand over his right fist just above his waist-line. He forcefully performed a squeeze-thrust once, upward into his stomach, but Henry Clay’s face was turning beat red, and his eyes were bulging in fright. Jack repeated the action once more, this time successfully dislodging the piece of meat, to everyone’s great relief. None more so than Henry Clay, who dropped back into his chair, coughing, and wiping his face, which had broken out in a sweat. The other diners in the restaurant applauded wildly.

While
Martha Maye attended to Henry Clay, Tess asked Jack, “Where’d you learn how to do that?” He just shrugged.

An
embarrassed Henry Clay excused himself to the restroom, and the others resumed eating, slightly shaken. When he returned to the
table, he acted sullen, pouty and quiet, refusing to eat another bite. As soon as everyone finished eating, he suggested that the first official meeting of the divorce support group end early.

“
Y’all, I hate to eat and run, or not eat and run, as the case may be, but I need to be gettin’ on home.”

They
said their goodnights, and Jack took Tess for a ride in Bessie, as the sun set and the full moon came into its glory. They got back to her house a little before nine o’clock.

“
Would you like to come in?” she asked, opening the front door. Jack hesitated, and stood in the doorway looking at her. She took his hand. “Come on.”

When Jack went into the den, after springing Ezzie from lock-up, he looked surprised to find Tess had lit several candles around the room. She was sitting on the couch waiting for him.

“
Would you like something to drink?”

“
No . . . thanks . . . I’m good.” His eyes scanned the room and then settled back on Tess. “How about some music?” she asked.

“
Sure.”

She
kicked off her shoes and walked to the bookshelves, flipping through her music on the iPod until she reached the playlist she wanted. She placed it in its dock and The Dixie Chicks’ “Cowboy Take Me Away” started to play. She walked over to Jack and held out her hand. “Dance with me, Cowboy.”

Ezzie
sat on the carpet and watched Jack and Tess slow dance through three songs. They talked softly and held each other closely; Tess alternated laying her head on his chest to looking up into his eyes as they swayed to the music. She ran her hands through his hair, forgetting about the area at the back of his head that was still sore from the mugging. She saw him wince as her fingers brushed over the spot.

“
Oh, it still hurts. How are the headaches?”

“
Better. Feel free to run your fingers through my hair anytime.” He smiled down at her.

Finally, she took his hand and led him to the couch. He leaned over, took the clip from her hair, and watched it tumble down around her face. He kissed her, his mouth taking hers hard, his arms pulling her into him. His kiss was all passion and hunger, and she returned it enthusiastically. In a few minutes time they were lying down, and the kisses were so hot and heavy, Tess wondered if the windows were fogging up.

Ezzie,
who’d been lying on the floor sleeping, suddenly lifted her head and barked. Five seconds later, the doorbell rang. Ezzie began barking in earnest, running to the door.

They
stopped kissing, but didn’t move.

“
No freaking way,” Jack whispered against her lips. He propped himself up on his elbows on either side of Tess and looked down at her, trying to slow his breathing.

Someone
knocked on the door.

“
Are you expecting anyone?” Jack started to move away.

She
pulled him back down to her. “No. Be quiet and maybe they’ll go away.”

He
kissed her.

The
doorbell rang again.

Tess
groaned in frustration. “I’d better see who it is.”

Jack
moved, and Tess got up, straightening her dress and hair as she headed to the door.

Jack
muttered, “You have
got
to be kidding me.”

He
stood up to tuck his shirt in and could hear Tess’s surprised voice as she opened the door.

“
Nicholas!”

jaeet
: verb \jeet\ did you eat

Jaeet yet?

[  July
2010  ]

Tess returned to the den with a tall, twenty-something, good-looking man.

“
Nicholas, this is my friend, Jack and his girl, Ezzie. Jack, this is my son, Nicholas.”

“
It’s really good to meet you, Nicholas.” Jack stood, reaching to shake Nicholas’s hand.

“
Jack is the writer I told you about.”

“
I’m real glad to meet you, too, Jack. Is that your ’54 pickup out there?”

“
It is! I just got her back from the shop today.”

“
Man, she’s sweet.”

“
I’d be happy to take you for a spin in her sometime.”

Nicholas’s
eyes lit up.

“
Nick, is everything all right?” Tess touched her son’s arm. “What in the world are you doing here out of the blue?”

“
I was worried about you. I decided to take a few days off and come check in. See for myself what’s going on.” He looked around the room, and the look on his face said he knew what had just been going on in the last few mintues.

Tess
hugged him again, keeping her arm around his back as she led them to the kitchen.

“
Come on in here, and let’s see about something to eat.” She looked down at Ezzie, “And of
course
you too, girl.”

She
took brownies out of the domed cake plate and set them on the table.

“
So, what exactly
is
going on?” Nicholas reached for a brownie.
“I mean with all the mayhem. I feel like I’ve gotten bits and pieces, but not the whole story.”

Tess
looked at Jack, wondering if she should tell Nick everything.

He
nodded encouragingly. “Go ahead,” he told her, and they spent the next hour talking about all that had happened, and what they had learned about Lou’s family.

“
This is wild stuff, Mom. It’s like you’re in the middle of a Columbo episode or something. So, what are you gonna do next?”

Tess
took a deep breath and looked at Jack. “Good question.”

“
I’ve talked to your mother about letting it all go, but . . . “

“
But if someone tells my mother not to do something, it just makes her dig in her heels that much more.”

Jack
smiled at Tess with a ‘you might as well plead guilty because
we both know you’ kind of look. He looked at his watch. “It’s getting late. I’d better go. And I’m taking you home with me, my beautiful
Esmerelda.” He patted Ezzie on the back. “Tess has a human to watch over her and eat her out of house and home now.”

Nick
looked questioningly at his mother, and she said, “Tell ya later. But he wasn’t casting aspersions on you. Just poking fun at Ezzie.”

“
Tess, are you still workin’ in the morning?”

“
Yes. Ten to two. Why?”

“
Why don’t I swing by here about noon thirty and take you to lunch, Nick?”

“
Sure, that would be great.”

At
the door, Jack and Tess did an awkward should-we-hug-no-lets-clasp-hands-no-let-me-kiss-your-cheek kind of dance. Nick looked at his feet and then blurted out, “I think I’ll just go get my stuff out of the car.”

Tess
and Jack burst out laughing once Nick cleared the porch. “Come here, you.” Jack reached for Tess and pulled her into his arms.

“
Jack, I’m sorry about tonight. I really had no idea he was coming.”

“
It’s all right. You have a great kid. I’m glad he’s here. I think I’ll sleep a lot better tonight knowing you’re not alone.” He gave her a
tender kiss. “There will be other nights.”  

“
I’m counting on it.”

As
Jack drove off, Tess and Nick waved. He looked down at his mother. “Noon thirty?”

“
That’s a goosepimpleism. Hang around long enough and you’ll be talking like one of the locals, too.”

* * *

Later that night, Tank Marshall made a phone call. 

“
It’s me,” he said, lighting a cigarette. “Hells bells, I know I’m not supposed to call you, but this is important. That woman and her
friend
were out to the house today askin’ all sorts a questions.”