Authors: Karen Haber
Alanna seemed to carve her way through those sad days with ruthless energy. There was a new toughness about her. Her temper flared easily, and she wouldn’t tolerate much sentimental discussion of Rick, cutting people off quickly if they didn’t take the hint. She devoted all her attention to Rick’s funeral preparations.
His funeral was a monumental affair, carried on all the vid channels and attended by an array of foreign dignitaries. He was buried where he had died, in the Roman arena. A marble sarcophagus held his mortal remains, and an eternal flame flickered in a golden urn at the base of his tomb.
A simple phrase, “No One Is Alone,” served as epitaph. Alanna had suggested it, and both of my parents endorsed it. I didn’t agree with the sentiment—after all, who had been more alone than Rick?—but I saw no harm in using it to honor my brother.
There were speeches by government officials and private citizens, by grief-stricken true believers and glib self-serving politicos.
My mother had not recovered sufficiently to attend the funeral—she was still under heavy sedation. Yosh had stayed behind to be with her, but had shipped me a tape of a poignant, powerful dirge, “Rick’s Ode,” which he had composed for the event. It quickly became Better World’s unofficial memorial anthem.
After the ceremony, the faithful were allowed to approach the grave site. In five minutes Rick’s tomb was buried under flowers that nearly smothered the eternal flame. The enrobement of Rick’s grave in chamiso branches and white roses became a tradition that persists to this day.
After Rick’s funeral, the cleanup process began in earnest and a million questions had to be answered.
“Julian,” Alanna said. “We must discuss rebuilding plans right away.”
“Who said anything about rebuilding?”
“Don’t you think it’s time? There’s an awful lot of people living in tents out there.”
“Well, then, fine. Tell them to do it.”
“You don’t understand. They want your blessing.”
“Why me? I have nothing to do with this.”
Alanna’s smile was incredulous. “But you’re all they have left of Rick.”
“They’re wrong. There’s nothing left of Rick. Nothing at all.”
“But—”
“No,” I said harshly. “If you want to rebuild and you’ve got the funds, go ahead and do it. But leave me out of it. Do you understand, Alanna? I want no part of it. Not one little piece.”
“Fine,” she said. “If that’s the way you want it.”
The construction crews and aircranes rolled into Better City the next day, without my blessing.
I was immensely busy in those days and refused all calls, all messages, fended off anyone besides Star or immediate family who tried to reach me. It was only by chance that Joachim Metzger got through.
“You’ve got a lot of brass calling me, Metzger.”
He ignored my offensive thrust. “I understand you took control of the sharing your brother was holding w {wash="18" hen he died,” Metzger said. “Well done. I’m sure you prevented a great deal of bloodshed. And now that you’re running the show, it should be a snap to shut down the remnants of Better World.”
I stared at him, completely flabbergasted. “Since you seem to have forgotten our last encounter, let me refresh your memory,” I said. “You were considering whether or not to have my brother killed. And there are certain people who are convinced that Rick
was
murdered and would enjoy receiving that information.”
“You know I had nothing to do with—”
“I thought I had made it clear that all communications between us were over.”
“But, Julian—”
“No buts, Metzger. If you make any further attempt to communicate with me I’ll do everything I can to implicate you in the murder of my brother. Is that clear? Goodbye, Book Keeper.” I cut the connection, smiling.
The screen rang almost immediately—Metzger calling back?—and I let the answermech take it. Goodbye, Metzger. Good riddance and go to hell.
There was a gentle knock at the door. “Julian,” Betty Smithson said. “May I come in?” She held an armful of printouts.
“I’m awfully busy, Betts, can it wait?”
She sat down as though she hadn’t heard my reply. “Julian, you were truly splendid that night in the arena. We have you to thank for saving us all.”
“Betty, really, I only did what anybody else would have if they could.”
“Nonsense. You were heroic, Julian. I can’t tell you how much I admire you for that.” She was looking at me in a peculiarly intense way, almost worshipful. “And you’ll be glad to know we’re getting closer and closer to the trail of those who killed your brother. It’s just a matter of time before we find them.”
Oh, Betty, I thought. If you only knew how close you’d come to having a genuine red herring thrown right down your throat. If you had just stepped into my office a few minutes sooner I could have fed you Joachim Metzger with a sprig of parsley. Aloud, I said, “Betty, you’re not serious.”
“What do you mean?” Her eyes were clear blue and guileless.
“You’re just kidding about this conspiracy theory, aren’t you?”
She looked stricken, pierced to the heart. “But I thought you understood. You mean that you don’t believe it? You’ve just been pretending?” Tears filled her eyes.
“Betty, I haven’t been pretending anything. You haven’t exactly given me a chance to disagree, you know.”
“I’m sorry.” She stood up, clutching the sheaf of printouts to her chest. “I thought you really did understand. But you will, Julian. You’re of his blood. You’ll see.”
rick had been
dead for almos
t
a mont
h
and I was
immersed in Better World business up to my neck. The more I tried to relinquish responsibilities the more tasks seemed to pile up around me. I had taken an indefinite leave of absence from my practice and hospital rounds. My life ~wash=hem.”was on hold, in orbit around Better World. The only thing that kept me going was the thought that Star would arrive any day now.
Once we had agreed that she would wrap up her business in Rio and come to New Mexico as soon as possible, we spent every night on the screen planning our life together. Last night her screen had been busy and I had finally left an impatient message of love, urging her to come quickly. I could hardly wait to hold her in my arms again.
I was working late in the improvised office I’d arranged on the second floor of B.W. headquarters when Alanna came for a visit.
“I can’t believe that your door is open,” she said. “Feeling unusually expansive?”
“Actually, I was just after some fresh air.” I looked up at her warily. All memory of the recent harshness between us seemed to have left her, or else she was repressing it mercilessly. My half-sister radiated good will.
“Oh, honestly, Julian. How about a truce?” She waved her hand in surrender. “You know we’ve got to talk.”
“About what?”
She seemed surprised. “Why, Better World, of course. We have to make some decisions.”
“I thought that’s what we’ve been doing.”
“Yes, certainly. What I mean to say is we have to talk about Betty and her paranoid suspicions. She’s starting to infect people with her conspiracy theory.”
“That crazy idea that Rick was assassinated?” I shrugged. “Tell everybody to get inoculations against her.”
“I’m not joking, Julian. It’s serious to her. I think it’s Betty’s way of trying to work through her grief and anger.”
“Not bad analysis coming from an amateur.”
She smiled. “Everybody in this organization seems to be looking for someone to blame. There’s already been so much ugliness, so much violence and death. Now I’m afraid that Betty’s wild ideas will spread. She’ll be leading a mob before we can stop her, chasing down some poor, innocent victim.”
“Is it that bad? I had no idea she had gotten so fanatic about it.”
“That’s why you’ve got to talk to her.”
“Me? Why?”
“You’re the only one she’ll listen to.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Come on, Julian. Even you can’t be completely oblivious to the way she looks at you. Ever since the night of Rick’s death she’s developed a huge case of hero worship for you. You’re the only one she respects. You’ve got to make her listen to reason, Julian. Before she becomes a major problem around here.”
“Well, if you think it’ll do any good I’ll go see her.” I peered up at the mountain of paperwork on my desk. “As soon as I get a free minute.”
I realize now that Alanna wanted me to do more than ease Betty’s suspicions. She wanted me to send Betty away. But that wasn’t exactly what happened.
The next morning around eleven o’clock I took a break, stretched my legs, and went to find Betty. She was in the library, watching a portascreen. I peered over her shoulder so I could see what she was viewing: it was a tape of that terrible night in the Roman arena e Re lthat she was running at half-speed, stopping occasionally to make notes.
“A little light entertainment, Betts?”
“Oh, Julian.” Flustered, she switched off the screen. “You should have called me if you wanted me. I would have come right away.”
“No need. I thought I would come see you.”
A look of pleasure, even awe, came over her. It confused and saddened me.
“I’m so glad you were looking for me, Julian. I’ve never told you adequately how marvelous you were that terrible night—”
“Betty, you’ve said plenty already.”
“No, it’s not enough. You just don’t know. You don’t realize, yet. But you are truly blessed, just as Rick was.” She grabbed my hand and, before I could pull away, kissed the back of it. Her eyes were deep blue and as fixed as those of any fanatic I had ever treated.
“Hey, cut it out, Betty. You’re embarrassing me. And you’re wrong.”
I waited for her to chuckle, maybe even blush. But she continued to smile at me with that same fixed, awful look on her face.
“I know that you’ll lead us to the assassins, Julian. You’ll help us achieve justice. Together, we’ll hunt down Rick’s murderers and avenge him.”
Could this really be the same Betty Smithson who had regarded me with a fishy glare at our very first meeting? I tried but failed to find that shrewd woman in this blissed-out zombie. Betty’s delusion about me was as big as the Sangre de Cristos. What could I do? Reasoning was pointless.
Using a telepathic probe, I reached gently into her mind and tried to get some sense of the scale of her obsession. My heart sank as I realized that she was completely lost in her paranoid beliefs. What would Rick have done, I wondered. How would he have healed her? And then I knew.
She thought I was Rick’s chosen successor. All right. Fine. She had certainly elected me to that post. Then I would act the part she had assigned to me. In fact, I would go one better. For Betty, I would become my brother.
I intensified the mental connection until I could create an image in Betty’s mind. Then I conjured up a picture of my brother and, acting as ventriloquist, had him give her a little talk.
Hello, Betts.
She gasped. “Who?”
Don’t you recognize me anymore?
“Rick, is that you?”
Who else? Betts, I can’t stay long but I wanted to talk to you.
“Yes, yes, please, Rick. Go on.”
You’ve got to listen to Julian, Betts. He’s got your best interests and those of Better World at heart. I don’t like all this anger and hatred I see in you. You have to forgive. Didn’t I teach you that? Understanding and love, Betts, not revenge. It’s the only way.
“But the murderers, Rick—”
There were no murderers, Betts. It was just my time to go. I wasn’t assassinated. Do you understand?
“I don’t know.”
I intensified the connection a bit and inserted a touch of post-hypnotic sust-ndered. Hggestion.
Betts, that’s not good enough. You must accept. Forgive. Let me go. Remember, understanding and love. It’s the only way.
“The only way.” Her voice was deep and slow, as though she were almost sedated.
Right. You’ve got it now. So no more of this weird conspiracy shit, okay?
“But …”
No buts. Hear me?
“Whatever you say, Rick.”
And listen to Julian. He’s the boss from now on.
“Of course.”
Okay then. So long, Betts. Take care of yourself and have a good, happy life.
With that, I put her into a light sleep and broke the mental connection.
Five minutes later she awoke. The robotic, glassy-eyed fanaticism was gone. In its place was pure, shining adoration. It would have to do, at least for now. I didn’t dare fiddle around with her mind any further.
“Julian,” she whispered. “I’ve had a vision, a wondrous vision. Rick was here. He spoke to me.”
“That’s fine, Betty. What did he say?”
Her eyes glowed. “That you were in charge from now on. That I was to listen to you about everything.”
“And do you feel comfortable with that?”
“Oh yes, yes. Completely.” She grabbed my hand, but I pulled away before she could kiss it again.
“Well, that’s fine,” I said. I was almost amused by my solution to Betty’s paranoia. But it saddened me as well. I had lost a friend and gained a worshipper. “I’ve got to run now but we’ll talk later. Do you feel all right?”
“Oh, Julian, I feel wonderful.”
As I left the room I could swear that she blew me a kiss.
Once back in my office, I checked my screen for messages, but there was no word from Star. Feeling a bit put out, I tried her number. No answer. Well, she was probably out holding a healing dance ritual. I admit that I was a bit jealous of the amount of attention she lavished on Mundo Melhor. Well, she would be here soon. Not soon enough, but soon.
I distracted myself with an analysis of my unconventional therapeutic approach to Betty’s problem. Not a bad solution, I thought. I was feeling a bit pleased with myself. But when I told Alanna about what I had done, she was less sanguine.
“I suggested that you calm Betty down,” she said. “Not buoy her up. Don’t you think you went just a wee bit too far with your intervention? She’s practically polishing your footprints.”
“I can’t help that,” I said. “Besides, it should wear off eventually.”
“No matter,” Alanna said. She rubbed her eyes wearily. “In the long run it will be to our advantage, anyway.”
“Meaning?”
“Why, the continued health and prosperity of Better World, of course.”
“Hey, just a minute here. I thought we were temporarily administering this place until things had calmed down enough for us to shut it down completely.”
“Is that what you thought?” Alanna smiled in a condescending way. “I had no idea. How could you imagine that we would ever close Better World? No, Julian, not ever. We’ve got to manage it as Rick would have wanted it done.”
“Hold on, Alanna—”
“Who else is better suited to the task, Julian? We both knew him best. We are both of his blood.”
“That doesn’t mean a damned thing. I’m a telepath, you’re a telekinete, and between us we couldn’t cure one leper.”
“You’ll do it, Julian.” Her tone implied that the answer was oh-so-simple, only an idiot like me couldn’t see it. “You have to carry on Rick’s work,” Alanna said. “You’re the only one who can do it.”
I stared at her. “Me? Why not you?”
“I’m not a telepath or I would. You
have
to do it, Julian.”
“Are you crazy, too?” I said. “I can’t do miracles. Listen to me, Alanna. I’m the other brother, remember? Just your average mutant. In any case, I don’t want to lead a cult. I already have a profession and clientele waiting for me on the other side of this country.”
She shrugged off my arguments as though she hadn’t even heard me. A strange light burned fiercely in her golden eyes, unnerving me. “You can hold sharings—you’ve already proven that. And as for the other hocus-pocus, well, we can manage things somehow with some vid magic.”
“Fake miracles? Alanna, I’m beginning to believe that you’re really serious about this.”
“I am, Julian. Deadly serious. What else is left to me now but Better World? It’s the only part of Rick that I can still touch.” Her voice wavered dangerously, and for a moment her face crumpled in grief. But she regained control instantly and put the steely mask right back in place. “We have to do it, Julian. For Rick. Don’t you see that?”
“I see that
you
think we have to do it, for you. And I also see that you’ve become as deranged by sorrow as Betty has, but you’re denying it.”
“Don’t patronize me, Julian. I know what I’m doing and I want you in on it. Rick would want it, too.”
“You know I can’t hold sharings,” I said. “Not the way that Rick did. To begin with, I would need half a dozen telepaths to assist me. More, if the crowd was really big.” I couldn’t believe I was actually discussing this. I stared across the table, trying to break through to her. “Alanna, listen to me. This makes no sense, no sense at all. What’s more
, I don’t want to do it
. I have no intention of doing it. Got that?”
“We’ll provide whatever you need.”
“You’re not listening.”
“Julian, we
must
maintain continuity. And control.”
“Why?”
Now her eyes flashed. “How can you ask me that? Don’t you care about Rick at all? About his legacy?” She leaned closer. “No, I don’t think so. In fact, I think you were jealous of him all the time.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” I was getting uncomfortable with the direction the discussion was taking.
“ifyt thYou’re probably relieved that Rick’s gone. You can’t wait to shovel Better World right after him into the grave.”
“That’s not true!”
“No?” she said. “Then prove it. Prove that you care about Rick and what he tried to accomplish. Don’t make a mockery of his life, Julian. Help me. Don’t you want to help people?”
“Of course I do. I’m a therapist. A healer.”
“Then heal. I need you. Rick needed you but you turned away. Don’t turn away again.”
“Forget it, Alanna. You can’t run Better World without a resident miracle worker. And I don’t want the job.”
She shot me a look of pure fury as she got to her feet. “I should have known you’d be heartless, just as you always were in the past. You don’t care about Rick, not at all. You never did.” And with that she was out the door and gone. But her words remained, etching their way into my conscience.