My Dearest Friend (Books We Love Regency Romance) (27 page)

“You will leave me?”

“There is no option. But I will not go as a thief in the night. Arrangements will need to be made. I will cause you no scandal, that at least, you will not be able to lay at my door. There are considerations to take into account which will not be ignored and for this I need some certainty for the future.”

His whole being tensed with rage, he too could see no end to their torment. “Madam
wife, you will have whatever you require, I have done pleading with you. You will not be left desolate, I assure you.  Take whatever you need.”

The thought rose
what I need is you
, but was thrust to the back of her mind; it would not do to dwell on impossibilities.

Chapter Seventeen

“I have given the matter some thought,” said the duke dispassionately, when he confronted Jane in her apartment the following morning. She sat in the window seat as he stood before her and waited for him to continue, which he did after only the slightest pause. “A short while ago you expressed the desire to retreat to the manor, which at the time seemed highly inappropriate, but now I see the sense of it.”

He waited for his wife to answer, but she still remained silent with no outward signs of emotion other than a slight compression of her lips and a flush to her cheeks in an otherwise pale countenance.

Seeing no opposition he said unemotionally, “The property has been but briefly uninhabited and therefore there should be no problem in opening up the house once more. Indeed, I will make the arrangements immediately. It would also mean that should I have need to contact you for any reason, there would not be the necessity to scour the country for you. Harry can stay at Stovely, he is settled there, and as you know, has no desire to return to his former home. Sophie will remain with me, it would not do to disrupt the child.” He paused slightly then asked, “Would these arrangements suit you? Have I thought of everything? Whatever funds you require will be made available, in fact you will be given a regular income. Do you have any other requirements?”

“As always, you have been very thorough,” replied Jane equally as coldly. “However, I will need no financial support from you, I have my own income on which to live and whilst not considerable it will suffice to ensure my independence. I will be self-contained. If possible I would wish to take up residence within the week, as I am eager to be gone from London.”

“And from me!”

She vouchsafed no answer. Her tongue refused to perpetuate the lie but, in her silence, she confirmed it as fact.

“So, we need not speak on the matter again,” said the duke, rising to take his leave. “Shall we say that your removal will take place by the week’s end?”

“
I will be ready when the arrangements are made,” she answered, not daring to meet his steely gaze. Never had she seen those eyes so cold and the look terrified her even more than his anger. If she had been aware of the emotions that raged below the surface she would have been even more alarmed, but the duke schooled his countenance to remain as stone, not daring to let loose the rein he held so tightly on his passions.

Bowing he took his leave to return to his study and with Deakin to begin the arranging. The interview with his wife had cost him dearly, but it would seem the only way forward, hoping that in giving her the desired independence some semblance of peace could exist between them.

Reasoning that something had to be lost before it could be found and trusting that his instincts were correct in this, he attempted to console himself with the thought that at least he had succeeded in keeping her within his sights, of knowing her location. If only he knew what fiercely kept secret lay behind her actions he was sure some resolution could be found, but for the moment, he knew it was useless to press her, realizing that it would only serve to drive them even further apart. He would keep Sophie with him, he could not lose the child as well and to him belonged her legal guardianship. Whilst she remained with him so was there hope of Jane’s return, for he knew that she would hate to be parted from the babe.

The thought that this was emotional blackmail passed through his mind only to be rejected, for was he not as strongly attached to the little one as she and the thought of losing her also proved too much to bear. However through all this anguish some ray of hope still existed otherwise he could not have borne to go on, he had seen a weakening of her resolve in the coach yesterday, albeit momentarily, but enough to generate some conviction that a reconciliation may still be possible. Indeed
, it must be!

***

The sight of Grebe Manor was not such a welcoming prospect as Jane had thought it would be. It evoked thoughts of Darrows and his actions. The fact that he had so recently inhabited her former home did nothing to recommend it to her. However, mentally straightening her shoulders, she entered its familiar portals to be greeted by members of staff who had been retained in her absence and before long she found herself sitting comfortably in the parlor and taking refreshment after the long journey.

Her husband had informed her of his intention of remaining in London for a little while before finally returning to
Stovely. She had not thought him present at her leave taking and had driven away from Blake House with feelings of total rejection. She had not perceived the shadowy figure that had stood at the upper window, bearing witness to her going. Only Sophie, in the arms of Hannah, had bade her farewell and the child’s look of bewilderment stayed with her throughout her journey into the country.

Now she must settle back into a way of life she had thought to have relinquished on the event of her marriage. It appeared that she must face a future without even Harry to bear her company. The thought of raising a child on her own in no way daunted her, but the thought that her husband would be in such close proximity and could not but be aware of its birth raised all manner of difficulties in her mind.

***

Days of idleness with little to occupy her other than the supervision of the household did nothing to ease her mind. The nausea and the tiredness had now left her and luckily the current high waisted fashion served to hide the very slight rounding of her figure. She took to walking the surrounding countryside finding that this helped to calm her tortured nerves and soothe her thoughts that forever strayed to the occupants of Blake House.

It was on her return from one such expedition some two weeks after occupying the manor that, rounding the corner of the house to enter by the front door, she found the duke’s chaise halted on the gravel drive and she recoiled with hand to throat at sight of it. The coach was empty with only the groom standing at the horses’ heads, its occupant having disappeared into the house. She had not been prepared for the emotions the mere sight of the equipage aroused and was about to turn back to the rear of the house to give herself time to regain some composure when Proctor and not her husband emerged from the front door and at sight of her hastened forward.

“I have been sent to fetch you, madam,” he said hurriedly, all formality forgotten. “His grace requests that you return immediately. Sophie is ill and she will not be content until you come.”

Anxiously Jane ran the few remaining steps into the house, Proctor following in her wake. “I will come directly,” she said, preparing to mount the stairs. “What is wrong? How serious is she?”

“Reynolds had been called and was examining her as I left this morning,” replied
Proctor, “I know not the nature of her illness, but Hannah told me that it came on her yesterday evening and worsened during the night. The duke was called and he sent for Reynolds immediately. Please hurry your grace, we must be on our way if we are to reach Blake House before midnight. The duke was most insistent that we should return immediately, he was very concerned about the babe.”

Running lightly up the stairs, Jane called for a maid and ordered a valise to be packed immediately.

Within a short space of time she returned to the driveway where Proctor paced impatiently beside the chaise. “I am ready to leave,” she said, directing him to take the valise from her maid and put it into the coach, he then assisted her into the interior and took his place on the box beside the groom and immediately they set out toward London.

After what seemed like an interminable journey, they finally arrived at Blake House just before midnight, the front door being flung open immediately the chaise halted. Not waiting for the steps to be lowered Jane leapt nimbly down and ran into the hallway to be met by Hannah who had been keeping watch for her arrival.

“The master says you are to go straight up, your grace,” she said anxiously, as she followed her up the stairs. “Sophie has been crying for you all day, there has been no pleasing her. No one will do but you. I tried my best to soothe her, but she would have none of me.”

They achieved the nursery and all seemed quiet as they stood outside. Cautiously Jane opened the door and peered into its darkened interior, the light of a single candle silhouetting the duke
’s figure as he sat at the babe’s side.

At sight of her, he quickly rose and coming forward pressed her back into the corridor. Indicating that Hannah should take his place, he quietly closed the door.

“Thank God you’ve come at last,” he whispered with a great relief. “I have been at my wit’s end. Reynolds has only just left, but he said that he would return again later.”

“What is wrong with her?” asked Jane urgently. “Tell me, I must know.”

“Scarlet fever! Reynolds believes it to have been carried by the new pantry maid who has also succumbed to it. No wonder our little girl has been so irritable of late, there has been no pleasing her and she has cried for you so.”

“You should have called for me earlier, Robert. The poor little mite, she must think that I have deserted her.” Noting his drained countenance, she rested her hand on his arm. “Let me go in to her now. I will sit with her. You rest and I will call you should I have need of you.”

“No,” he replied, “we will sit together. I could not rest, it would be impossible. She needs us both.” Then looking down into her upturned face, he asked quietly, “Could you not bear with my company until the babe is recovered? I will not press you in any way; you are free to do as you wish, only for this time, we must call a truce.”

“
There is no need to ask this, Robert. Sophie must come before everything else. Whatever exists between us is nothing compared to our child’s welfare. Now tell me what is to be done for her? What can we do to ease her?”

“Reynolds says that we are to sponge her to help bring down the fever and he has left a draught that is to ease the pain in her throat and head. The rash may seem alarming but it will fade in time, but we must be aware that there could be complications brought on by the condition.” His voice broke and he was unable to meet her gaze. Taking her hand he said in subdued tones, “My dear, I cannot tell you how grateful I am for your support. If you had not come, I know not what I would have done.”

Jane returned the pressure of his fingers. “There would have been no question that I would not have come and now that I am here there is no need for you to bear this alone. Do you think I would desert her? Come, Robert, all will be well I am sure. Now you must take some nourishment, and ask for something to be sent to me on a tray. I will remain with Sophie until you return and then we can sit with her together, but we must watch in turn throughout the night. At least in that way, we will preserve our strength for whatever is needed.”

With a brief nod of his head he was gone. Not wishing to put the full burden onto his wife, and knowing a vast relief at her presence, he determined to return as quickly as possible.

Jane entered the nursery quietly, but the gentle opening of the door was sufficient to rouse Sophie from her sleep and she whimpered and fretted, pushing away Hannah as she would have bathed her forehead

“
I will take her now,” said Jane bending low over the babe and raising her in her arms, but in her fever Sophie did not recognize her and braced her hands against her chest trying to push her away. Jane sat in the chair at the side of the bed and attempted to soothe her by rocking her in her arms, but even this would not do and she had to return her to her bed.

“
Give me the doctor’s draught,” she requested of Hannah. “Perhaps that will help calm her, she needs to sleep.”

With difficulty they managed to get Sophie to drink a little of the liquid, all the while crying at the soreness of her throat, but eventually its effects brought about some respite for the child, lulling her into a more relaxed sleep.

“Go to bed now,” Jane told Hannah. “We will have need of you in the morning so you must take your rest whilst you may. My husband and I will stay with her, but we will call you should it be necessary.”

Dropping a slight curtsey Hannah did as she was bid and closing the door quietly behind her, left Jane to sit by the babe’s side. A short while later, a footman entered with a tray containing a light supper and a glass of wine. Jane took the wine but ignored the food, her anxiety making it impossible for her to eat.