My Guardian Angel (7 page)

The various images of the night slowly pushed their way to the forefront of my mind.
The heavy rain falling down, tapping hard on the windows. The soft jazz music playing in the background. The blood gradually seeping through the grout on the kitchen floor.

“Kassia?” Jason’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

He stood up and pulled his chair next to me. He reached out his arm and wrapped it around my shoulder. The moment he touched me, I felt my body relax. I leaned my head towards his shoulder and huddled closer. He rested his cheek on my head and held me. I closed my eyes and pushed back whatever images polluted my mind. I then let the scent of Jason wash away all that I felt tainted me.

I don’t know whether minutes or hours passed, but he held me until I was ready to move.

“I'm sorry,” I said quietly, as I pulled away from him, already missing his warmth.

“It’s
okay.” He smiled.

I took my tea, which was now cold and nearly drank it all, the cool liquid trickling down my parched throat.
He moved away, making me feel worse. I wanted to be with him, but I was too afraid to admit it. Now that he knew I was damaged goods, what would be the point?

“You?” I asked, without thinking.

“Me?” He narrowed his eyes.

“Why did you become a cop?” I asked, wanting to change the subject.

“I'm SWAT, not a cop
,” he corrected.

“Sorry.” I half smiled.

“Like all little boys, I wanted to protect the good guys from the bad guys, but the truth is I look really hot in my SWAT uniform,” he added with a wink.

“Yeah
, you do,” I let slip. He furrowed his eyebrows at my comment. “What? I'm a girl and I have eyes.” I made a joke to lighten the mood. “Plus we’re friends, so I can say this to you.”

The awkwardness of our conversation began to ease.
“I guess you can.” He laughed.

My phone began to ring. Talking Head’s
“Psycho Killer” began to play. He gave me curious look.

“What? I like the song.” I slid my finger across and answered my phone.

“Hey, girl! How’s the writing going?”
It was Tiff checking up on me.

“It’s going great
, actually.” It was. I was over my writer’s block and was writing almost every day.

“How far along are you?”
she asked.

“Almost finished it.”

Tiff squealed on the phone.

“Are you serious? I can’t wait to read it, plus your new editor seems to like you a lot. She says you have your own style which she finds great and easy to read.”
I grinned. I liked Stephanie, too.

“Really? I'm glad to hear it.
I like her way better than that douchebag.”

She scoffed.
“Anyone was better than him, babe. Anyways, I’ll let you go. Finish up and send it to me.”

She hung up and left me feeling awesome about myself.
She always had that ability.

“So
, I guess I better walk you home then.” Jason stood up.

“Oh.” I looked at the time. “Shit! I kept you, sorry.” I stood up
, gathered my things and headed outside.

“You don’t have to walk me home.” I thumbed over my shoulder, pointing to my street. “Thanks for having coffee with me
,” I said, readying myself to leave.

He leaned in close. “I'm walking you home, so let’s go.” He took my bag and began to run ahead of me.

“Hey!” I yelled running after him.

“You didn’t have to, you know?” I pointed as we reached the front of my house. Walking home with Jason was calming after having told him my story. It wasn’t something I did often, but there was something I liked in him, which made me want to open up. Maybe if I did, he would see something in me and would want me the way I wanted him.

“We’re friends and I take care of my friends.” He laughed and patted me on the head.

“You want to stop doing that?” I warned.

“Why?” It was a fair question, but I couldn’t tell him that the mere touch of his hand sent me over the edge.

“
’Cause, I'm older than you and I don’t like being patronized by someone as young as you,” I lied.

“Sure thing, granny.” He winked.

This comment left me with a murderous feeling inside me. Granny? Who was a granny? Not me!

“Granny
,” he said again.

“Listen
, junior. I swear I'm going to kick your ass, if you don’t stop,” I threatened. He only smiled.

“Sure you will
,” he mocked. “I’ll watch you go inside.” He nodded his head towards my door.

“Thanks again for today.” I was grateful for him coming to my rescue.
 

I walked up the steps to my home and opened my front door. I turned and watched as Jason left.

I looked down and there at the foot of my door was a small package.
I guess one of my fans must have sent me something. It happened that I would get one or two packages a month. The rest usually went straight to the publishing house. I picked it up and walked inside. I threw it on the counter and headed upstairs to take another shower and ready myself mentally for my writing stint. I began to listen to some music and made myself a tea.

I had forgotten about the package, until I saw it on the counter. I smiled knowing that once I opened it, I would get more fuel to write.
I ripped the box open and inside was an mp3 player and a dead rose. Attached was a note that read:

HoPe YoU LiKe It As MuCh As I LiKe YoU

ThEsE SoNgS MaKe Me ThInK AbOuT YoU

This had to be some cruel joke, I plugged it in and the music began to play.
The sounds of a drum with a tambourine filled my home and the voice of a male singer began to sing:

“Have I the right to hold you. You know I’ve always told you. That we must never ever part.
Have I the right to kiss you. You know I’ll always miss you. I’ve loved you from the very start. Come right back I just can’t bear it. I’ve got this love and I long to share it. Come right back I’ll show my love is strong.”

The mp3 player lit up and the name of the song scrolled on it
. The Honeycombs “Have I the Right.” I put my teacup down and stood still as the next song began to play. A heavy bass began to strum, the eerie sound echoing itself throughout my integrated speakers and then the drum kicked in.

How I wish you could see the potential

The potential of you and me

It's like a book elegantly bound

But in a language you can't read just yet

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

There are days when outside your window

I see my reflection as I slowly pass

And I long for this mirrored perspective

When we'll be lovers, lovers at last

You reject my advances and desperate pleas

I won't let you let me down so easily

So easily

You got to spend some time, love

You got to spend some time with me

And I know that you'll find love

I will possess your heart

I remembered this song from when I was younger. I was in college and my roommate loved it, it was from the Death Cab for Cutie’s, “I Will Possess Your Heart.” I walked over to my stereo and was going to yank it out when David Bowie’s “Love You Till Tuesday” started to play.

Just look through your window, look who sits outside

Little me is waiting, standing through the night

When you walk out through your door I’ll wave my flag and shout

Ohh, beautiful baby

My burning desire started on Sunday

Give me your heart and I’ll love you till Tuesday

Who’s that hiding in the apple tree, clinging to a branch

Don’t be afraid it’s only me, hoping for a little romance

If you lie beneath my shade, I’ll keep you nice and cool

Ohh, beautiful baby

I was very lonely till I met you on Sunday

My passions never-ending and I’ll love you till Tuesday

Let the wind blow through your hair, be nice to the big blue sea

Don’t be afraid of the man in the moon, because it’s only me

I shall always watch you until my love runs dry

Ohh, beautiful baby

My hearts a flame, I’ll love you till
Tuesday

My heads in a whirl and I’ll love you till
Tuesday

Love, love, love, love you till
Tuesday

Love, love, love, love you till
Tuesday

Well, I might stretch it till Wednesday

My skin began to crawl and I knew this was more than just a joke. It had happened before, but just as it started, it ended. Getting weird fan mail wasn’t out of the norm, but still it creeped me out.

I ripped it out of my stereo and placed it back into the box with the note and the dead flower. I walked up to my door and made sure it was locked. I armed the alarm and headed upstairs with my laptop. I wasn’t much in the mood to write, but maybe I would
be the moment I started.

Hostages

“Dar! Lower the
fuckin’ TV already!” I screamed from the kitchen. My brother had come over for a ‘visit’; more like he called to make sure I was making lasagna. Damn him and his annoying ways. It was our favorite food growing up. I can’t tell you how he knew, but my brother always knew when I was making it. He was here without fail, each and every time. I turned the oven light on and checked. A light, crisp, brown color had formed on top, as the cheese was perfectly melted. I turned it off and opened the oven door. I was engulfed by the rich aromas of tomato and fresh herbs. The sizzling sound of the cheese and sauce in the deep-dish pan made my stomach rumble in anticipation.

“Damn girl! It smells good in here! I'm glad I came over today
,” Darios yelled from the couch he was lying down on.

“Whatever, Dar!” I grimaced with my back turned to him. Had he not come here, I would have had the whole thing to myself.
Slowly enjoying every morsel, but now I would need to fight for my food. It didn’t matter if it was on my plate either. The man ate everything in sight. I gently placed my masterpiece on the counter. I took off my oven mitts and admired it for a minute.

“Breaking News. Shots have been fired here at the downtown Manhattan clinic. Police say a deranged man has walked into a clinic, demanding to see his wife. Sources say that his wife had died a few weeks back from the H1N1 virus.
The man is armed and has taken hostages.”

“Holy shit
,” Dar murmured.

I looked up and saw a few SWAT teams there lined up with their black trucks and gear. My heart skipped a beat. What if Jason was there?

“The incident started not too long ago, but it seems to have escalated the moment the SWAT teams arrived. The man began waving his gun and shooting at those who came near him.”

I moved closer to the television
, wanting to see more. I was hoping that I could see Jason’s face, but I couldn’t. That’s when I saw the precinct number; it was Jason’s. Now all I had to do was pray that he wasn’t working today. I sat down glued to the TV, wondering what could happen next.

“Police say more shots have been fired and a few SWAT officers have been hurt, but the man has been subdued.
He was shot with a rubber tipped projectile that was filled with a beanbag. A normal tactic, especially when there are many innocent lives at stake.”

“I have to go
,” I said in a panic, as I stood up and went for the door. All I kept thinking about was
‘a few SWAT officers were shot’.

“Go where?”
my brother called after me.

“I need to go, Dar.” I took my jacket and took off.

I rang up the precinct, which Jason worked at, remembering that Tiff made me call the secretary and thank her for her help. I was finally thankful that I was famous. She gladly gave me the hospital where they were taken. I hailed a cab and sat anxiously as I waited until he drove me there. Once the cabby stopped in front of the hospital, I threw him the money and ran inside.

The place was swarming with people.
Nurses were running around, trying to control the hectic influx of people.

“I'm sorry.” I grabbed onto the orderly
who was there. “Can you tell me where the SWAT officers, the ones who were shot, are?” I asked anxiously.

“Down the hall, to the left
,” he said without bothering to look at me and continued on his way. I quickened my pace and went down the hall, but was stopped by a nurse.

“I'm sorry, but you’re not supposed to be here.” A thin blond
e nurse, who looked about fifty, appeared before me. She looked down at me from her brown-rimmed glasses, holding onto her folders.

“I'm looking for the SWAT officers who were shot
,” I said as I tried to get past her, but she blocked me again.

“Are you family?”
she asked.

“No, I’m not. I just want to make sure that one of them isn’t a friend of mine
,” I bit out, my anxiety getting the better of me.

“Then I'm sorry, I can’t let you go there.” She pointed to the
exit, which led me out to the lobby.

“Look, I totally understand why you can’t let me go through. I get it. I really do, but I need…”

“I'm sorry, but unless you are family, you cannot be permitted to go past these doors. Now either you leave quietly or I will have security escort you out.” She glared down at me.

“Fuck
,” I muttered under my breath as I walked out to the waiting room. Now what? Maybe if I call Tiff, she’ll figure out a way. I pulled out my phone and started scrolling down my numbers for hers.

“Kass?” I heard a familiar voice from behind me. I turned around and almost fell forward as I started to run towards Jason.
I stretched out my arms and nearly jumped onto him as I wrapped myself around him.

“
Oh, thank God, you’re okay,” I breathed. I held on tight, trying desperately to accept that he was right in front of me and safe.

“What are you doing here?”
he asked, surprised at my presence.

That’s when I realized how irrational I may have acted.
Without a moment’s thought, I came running to make sure Jason was all right. I let go of my kung fu grip around his neck and slowly slid off him, embarrassed at my impulsive behavior. I began scratching the back of my neck, uncomfortable with myself and what I had done by running into his arms. What made it worse was that through my tunnel vision of only seeing Jason, I didn’t see the rest of his team was there with him. Each one of them was giving me or each other knowing looks. I hung my head low, not able to look right at him.

“Well, you know I'm pretty famous, so I'm here to do some visiting at the hospital and saw you here
,” I lied horribly through my teeth and God did I feel bad about it. Note to self, remind Tiff, I’ll need to visit this hospital and make it up to them.

“Oh
,” he said, smiling from ear to ear. “Would have been nice, had you been here to see if I was okay.”

“Yeah well, don’t get a big head, I just was passing by.” I nodded. “I guess since my day is done here, I better get back home.” I quickly looked back down, not wanting to see him smiling at
my obvious lie and me. Stupid me, not only did I make an ass of myself, I left Darios alone with my lasagna.

“Kass?” I heard Jason calling from behind me, but I ignored him. I was making for a quick and not ‘very lady
-like’ getaway, trying desperately to get out of there. “Kass? Wait up!” But I kept going.

Idiot! What the hell was I thinking about running here? Had Jason even thought of me in that way, wouldn’t he think that I would be here to see if he got hurt?
I mean, it’s only natural, right? Of course, Jason wouldn’t see me that way. He was younger and had a life of his own and I was only his friend and nothing more. I drilled that into my mind and decided then and there, I would stop thinking about Jason and start focusing on my life. 

“Could you wait?”
he shouted as he finally reached me and stopped me from going any further. “Didn’t you hear me calling you?” he questioned.

“Sorry, I guess I didn’t hear you.” I bit my lip.

“Look, whatever your reasons are for being here, thanks for checking up on me and making sure I was alright.” He smiled.

“Yeah, well, whatever.” I shrugged.

“Kass seriously, it really meant a lot,” he said more vehemently.

“I don’t know what came over me.
I saw that it was you guys downtown and when I heard that a few of you were shot, I panicked and came running here. Sorry if I caused any trouble. I'm just glad you’re okay,” I murmured, finally admitting to my not too believable farce. Jason stepped closer, but I pulled away, waving down a cab I saw coming. “Well junior, I'm glad to see you on your own two feet. See you around.” I opened the cab door and drove away, leaving a confused Jason on the sidewalk.