My Secret Master (A Dark Billionaire Romance) (18 page)

“Returning to my home comes with a price. You spent so much time with me behind that special door... surely you know my taste for punishment. And surely we
both
know how much you enjoy it.”

In my throat, my breathing hitched. Like I had a portal into his twisted mind, I could imagine every single thing he was. Worse, the arousal was radiating out of me.

Was I so damaged, so longing for more, that even the mere mention of his torture had me growing wet?

Swallowing, I said, “Just tell me what you want.”

Grinning, he took a slow inhale. “I want you to let me have my way with you. Allow me to punish you the way a Dom would reprimand his sub. If you don't back down, no matter
how hard
I go at you...” His fingers cupped my cheek, and it took everything I had not to lean forward and kiss him. “Then, dear Opal.” My heart jumped at that name. “You may have your wish. You'll get your letter.”

The huskiness in his tone said volumes. If I went back, Seth would be allowed to do whatever he wanted to me. I'd seen some of his tools, felt the hot burn of his palms. How devious would he be with me without boundaries?

What if I
couldn't
handle it?

Seth was watching me closely. The hunger in his face said he knew why my cheeks were so flushed. Clearing my throat, I met his eyes as calmly as I could. “How much time do I have to think this over?”

Backing away from me, he smoothed his jacket. “Until tonight. If you want this chance, just message Corbin. Once you reach my home, there will be no going back.”

His threat curled inside my lower belly. “I understand.”

“Good.” With one more look around my apartment, Seth circled towards the door. “Don't take my offer lightly. This is no game.” Peering back at me, his eyes were heated. “I look forward to hearing you beg again.”

And then he was gone.

Breathing out like a deflated balloon, I fell onto my bed. Standing was impossible. Seth had left, and he'd taken my strength with him.
Another chance.
The phrase was so nice.

If only it didn't come with a price.

Brushing my hair back, I looked at my palms, flexing my fingers. I'd never expected to see Seth again. But the opportunity to go back to the erotic, dark world he'd opened my heart to... it was immensely tempting.

He acted like he was sure I'd agree.

His parting words had made my heart drum madly. And was he wrong for being so cocky? I
needed
that letter, but he had acted like I needed something else.

I had to wonder, if I did go back, would it be for the letter, or would that just be my excuse?

It scared me, how little I knew myself anymore.

Standing up, I looked for my phone.

****

C
orbin said nothing as we drove.

The tires crunched, rolling us along the curved roads up the Hollywood hills. The sky was too bright, it didn't fit with the hurdle I was about to face.

Unable to handle the crushing silence, I said, “How has he been lately?”

The driver glanced at me in the mirror. After a second, he looked away again.

Sinking into the seat, I hugged myself until I was a tight knot. Corbin's silence felt... forced. Had Seth instructed him not to speak to me?

If the goal was to give me a sense of hopelessness, it wouldn't work. I'd decided to return to Seth's home, and I'd done it for myself.

No matter how this ended, I had a chance at gaining something. I still believed that when life offered such things, you had to snatch them up.

Seth had made the offer, but the control wasn't all his.

No one had forced me into this car.

No one but me.

The gates appeared, and my chest went cold. Sitting up, I listened to the ringing in my ears as Corbin parked the car. He came around, helping me out, but still never looking at me.

Then, as I started to break away, he brushed my wrist. “Good luck,” Corbin whispered.

With a weak smile, I headed towards the front door.

The place hadn't changed. I don't know why I had expected it to. Though just a few days had passed, it felt like a lifetime.

I didn't see Seth; my eyes had gone straight up, taking in the familiar, unfinished mural I'd spent almost two weeks working on. A part of me, deep down, twanged with regret. I wanted to run up to that painting, to finish what I'd started.

The incomplete state of it was painful.

“So you decided to come.”

Jerking up straight, I watched Seth as he turned on the couch. He'd been facing away, and now, I could see his strong back straining against the smooth surface of his suit. It was a rich blue, deeper than his eyes.

Eyes that burned into me with expectation.

Clearing my throat, I stepped further into the room. I didn't want to look as unsure as I felt.
Face your fears head on.
Besides, what was I scared of? Seth?

Yes.

I guess I was.

Folding my arms, I said, “Are you actually surprised?”

His lips didn't smile, but his eyes did. “Not many people would walk willingly into danger.”

Danger.
My heart throbbed, but I pushed it down. “I already know what you're capable of.”
And you know how much I enjoy it.
My own thoughts had me blushing.

Seth tilted his jaw, reminding me how atrociously handsome he was. “You
think
you know what I'm capable of, Ms. Starling.” Pushing off the couch, he strolled my way with a confident sway. His hands were deep in his pockets, pulling my attention to his hips—his belt—and making me imagine what rested beneath.

That body...

That amazingly thick cock.

Dazed, I inched my heel back when he was mere inches away. Seth stood over me, a shadow in his smile. He whispered, “You're naive to believe you know what I can do. What I
want
to do. All men have monsters inside of them.”

“Yes, and I've met yours. A few times,” I said, nodding at the golden door.

“No,” he chuckled. “You've only glimpsed mine.” One hand slid into view, and I thought he would touch me... but he only straightened his tie. “Knowing that, are you still sure you're ready to face it in the dark? Unrestrained, no limits... no backing down?”

I couldn't stop watching how he stroked his tie. My mouth was dry; I swallowed, then narrowed my eyes at him. His cockiness was frustrating. It drove me crazy how easily he had my lower belly purring.

Steeling myself, I breathed deep. “Is this really the only way to get back in your good graces?”

Seth's fingers paused on his tie, choking it. “Yes.”

“Then I'm not walking away.” I dug for every fiber of confidence inside of me. “I'm not going to throw away this chance.”

“Even if what I do to you leaves you in pieces?” he asked softly.

Astoundingly, I didn't react. “You wouldn't do that to me.”

He hesitated, uncertainty swimming through his eyes. Then it was gone, and Seth motioned us towards the golden door. “Let's not waste any time, brave girl.”

My feet were as heavy as anchors. I didn't feel them while I walked. I didn't even feel my hands at the ends of my arms. Faced with the moment, knowing that we were about to descend into that place where I'd done so many, many sexual things...

It left me breathless.

Worse, we were going down there as ourselves. Always before, I'd had the safety of my mask. I could cloak myself in secrecy, pretend I was someone else. But now, we wouldn't be Onyx and Opal.

Seth meant to have his way with me as himself.

Whatever happened after this... I wouldn't be able to shake free of it.

Naomi—me—I'd experience everything.

“Go on,” he said, opening the door.

Perching at the top of the stairs, my molars throbbed; my jaw was locked. I passed close to him, catching his intoxicating scent. I had a vision of myself swooning, tumbling down the steps until I was just a broken heap.

Would that be worse than what he had planned for me?

“Go,” he said. Every hair on my body became a solid spear.

The first step was the hardest. The rest came easier, like the momentum was carrying me forward. There were lights on the walls, but they did little to brighten the mood.

How did I get here?
I wondered, listening to my shoes thump on the carpet.
And why is this so foreboding?
I'd already let Seth tie me up, he'd teased me, tortured me...

Fucked me till I was ready to pass out.

So why was this so different?

He said all men have monsters inside of them.

Was he right, that I had no clue what he was truly capable of? Was my intuition preparing me for something terrible, and that was why my hands were shaking?

The curtain rose up. For once, there was no gentle hum of voices on the other side. Seth stood close behind me, stopping all chances of escape. I'd said I was ready—said I could handle whatever he had in store for me.

In a way, I was glad he was there to block me. Fighting the urge to bolt up the stairs was hard enough. “Ms. Starling, are you ready?”

Unable to look away from the curtain, I nodded slowly.

“Do you want me to give you one more chance to back away?” he asked.

I parted my lips. “No.”

“Good.” His fingers grazed my elbow, making me jump. “I don't think I could let you leave. Not when I'm so close to getting to taste you again.”

Shivering, I half-turned, but Seth pushed me through the curtain. The shove made me stumble, though it wasn't rough; my knees were simply too stiff, my balance lost in my growing anxiety.

The main area was unsettling. With no people, it felt haunted. Spinning, I watched Seth as he waited. I
knew
he was waiting, and I had an idea what for. Licking my lower lip, I said, “Where do you want me to go?”

His head nodded down the hall. “I think you have some idea.”

Facing the dark corridor, the memory of the night that Seth—Onyx—had brought me forward for my first training session wormed in my guts. It made me warm, and it nipped at my confused brain.

He was right.

I knew exactly where we were going.

Naomi

––––––––

C
lenching my hands, I walked stiffly down the hall. Behind me, Seth followed, saying nothing. He didn't stop me when I approached the room he'd first tied me up in. The place he'd shown he could break me.

What would he do to me now?

In the center of the room, I turned towards him. He swung the door closed, the metal clicking as it locked. I doubted we'd be interrupted, but the extra barrier added to my nerves.

His slight smile said he knew—and that he liked it.

“So,” he said, undoing the buttons on his jacket. “Here we are.”

It was such a meaningless statement, I almost laughed. “Yes. Here we are.”

“You're calmer than I thought you'd be.” He draped his jacket over a chair. Beneath, his white shirt was out of place. Down here, Seth shouldn't have been allowed such purity. “Are you really not scared? Or is it that... maybe... you're looking forward to what I have planned for you?”

My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth. There was too much truth in his observation. I did want this, even if it was in a deep, low part of me that was fucked up. A sliver that was tempted by the sordid and erotic things Seth could do to me.

His eyebrows arched. “No response?”

Lifting my chin, I frowned. “Isn't it enough of an answer that I'm here?”

“You're here, I'm just trying to figure out why.” Peeling his sleeves back, he came my way. “Is it because of the letter... or is there more?”

When he was a foot away, I tightened up from toe to jaw. “What do you mean?”

Laughing under his breath, he shrugged. “Ms. Starling, do you
want
me to destroy you?” In the low lights, his eyes went black. “Do you ache for my punishment? For how I can make you sweat... make you scream and beg until your voice is raw?”

He was on me, a towering, intimidating beast that pawed at some instinctual desire. It didn't matter if he was right.

I didn't want to admit anything.

“Lift your hands,” he snapped, so crisp his tone could cut diamonds.

Sweat coated my palms. Whether it was defiance or nerves, I didn't move an inch. The look in his eyes was soaked with wild passion. He
wanted
me to fight. I was giving him exactly what he'd hoped for.

In a flash, he snatched up my arms, wrenching them over my head.
It's just like last time,
I thought, struggling in his grip. Seth was pure muscle, he held me easily with one wide hand as he locked my wrists in the cuffs dangling from the ceiling.

Stepping back, he smiled. “Still so quiet.”

Yanking at the shackles, I glared at him. “It's not like there's much for me to say. You made it clear, you're going to do what you want.”

“Yes. And I'll remind you that you agreed.”

Without a rebuttal, I bit the inside of my cheek.

From his pocket, Seth slid something metallic into the light. I thought it was his watch, but the shape was wrong.

My heart jerked.

A knife!

“Wait,” I said, eyeing the wicked blade. “You can't use that on me.” My smile was shaky, nervous. “You wouldn't actually hurt me, right?”

I didn't like the coolness in his stare. “Now that you're strung up, unable to escape, you finally wonder about that?” Turning the knife, Seth ran it along the sleeve of my shirt. I'd worn jeans and a basic, yellow blouse. Through the material, the metal was all I could focus on.

Hooking the knife in the throat of my shirt, Seth smiled and said, “Here's your answer.”

Two things happened at once: I screamed.

And the shirt shredded away.

Gasping frantically, I watched as he cut my clothing into strips. The shirt vanished, drifting to the floor in a puddle. Next, my jeans were sawed at, my legs exposed to the air. Seth was efficient, he acted with familiarity as he worked.

My relief over not being harmed made it easy to forget I was almost naked. The sound of my bra strap popping pulled me back to reality.