My Splendid Concubine (60 page)

He doubted Ayaou
would be treated as an equal. He suspected that the beliefs of his family did not include people outside their own race. Over time, Mary and his mother might accept Ayaou, but he didn’t want to take the chance that they would hurt her feelings. He loved her too much to subject her to that form of cruelty.

“
Chou Luk is here,” Guan-jiah said. “Master, it would please Ayaou if you greeted him first. It is only proper.”

Every time he talked to Chou Luk, he only heard bad news.
“Where is the old man?” Guan-jiah bobbed his head and led the way. They found the Chou Luk sitting aft in the shade with two young girls cooling him with large handheld fans.

He tried not to stare. Chou Luk had aged and gained weight. A lot of his hair had fallen out and what remained looked greasy and stringy. The flesh on his face sagged and the mole on his chin looked larger. The bags under his eyes seemed filled with black ink.

“Ah,” the old man said. “My son-in-law has come to pay his respect.”

Robert almost said,
I am not your son-in-law, but he managed to keep his mouth shut and his face expressionless.

Chou Luk made no effort to rise. The old man
’s puffy eyes were half closed. From the length of his whiskers, it looked like he hadn’t shaved in days. His body had a rancid, sour odor. Robert wanted to ask if he bathed, but he knew this to be unacceptable and rude. Piety forbids criticizing elders. To do so, would only earn Ayaou’s anger. He didn’t want that. He wanted his stay to be pleasant.

He recognized one of the girls. She
’d been with the old man when Robert had fallen in love with Ayaou. Although he knew she had to be at least fifteen, she looked younger. He wondered who the other girl was. He didn’t think she was one of Ayaou’s sisters. He’d never seen her before.

“
I see you are well cared for,” Robert said, after nodding his head slightly. He didn’t offer his hand. He didn’t want to give this old man too much respect.

Chou Luk gestured with his hands.
“My wives,” he said. “I bought another wife a few months ago since the first one hasn’t given me a son.” Chou Luk spit on the deck and scowled. “Only two daughters—clean that up, girl,” he said to the first wife. “Daughters are useless. All they do is eat and cost money. I was going to stuff them in a sack filled with rocks and toss them in the river, but she cried and begged. She said if I got rid of them, I wouldn’t have them to help feed and clean me when I can’t leave my bed any longer.”

Robert hid the revulsion he felt. He knew that in China women had little or no value.
Instead, he said, “Your business must have been profitable to be able to acquire a second wife.” The thought of these two young girls with this old man sickened him.

“
No, business has been bad. Ayaou gave me the money. She said two wives would take care of me better than one and provide double happiness and double the chance of a son to carry on the family name.”

After the greetings, Guan-jiah led Robert forward, away from Chou-Luk.
“Where did he get the money to buy the second girl?” he asked. He suspected the truth and feared he was right.

“
Ayaou took it from the money you sent.”

Blood rushed to his head. God, forgive me, he thought. Light headed, he grabbed the railing to keep from losing his balance.

“And the rest?” His stomach felt as if it were full of snails, shells and all. He feared the answer. What if she had given it to the fortuneteller?

“
It went to Cousin Weed. He used it on repairs for the junk. I made sure of that, Master.”

“
Thank you, Guan-jiah.” He felt like he was going to lose his breakfast. It sickened him to think that some of his money had been used to buy Chou Luk another young girl. The girls were no beauties, but what a horrible fate. He wondered what would happen to them after Chou Luk died. Would Cousin Weed take care of them or sell them to someone else?

His reunion with Ayaou was strained from the start. She’d given birth two months earlier, and Robert was relieved to learn that she had gone through the delivery without difficulty since he’d worried she might die during childbirth.

He had not forgotten about the child—a memory that only magnified his guilt. Since he was not married to Ayaou, he was betraying everything he
’d been taught as a Christian.

The baby was a girl with dark skin and fluffy brown hair. Al
though still beautiful, Ayaou looked tired. “Robert,” she said, “it needs a name.”

“
She’s two months old and doesn’t have a name yet?” He couldn’t take his eyes off the child. “I don’t understand.”

“
You are the father,” she said. “You name it.”

He did not want to give the baby a name. If he named her, he was a
ccepting responsibility for her. He stared at the child and hated himself. He was starting to think too much like a Chinese man.

Although he admired much about Chinese culture, that was one aspect he refused to adopt.
“I’ll name her Anna,” he said. He decided Anna should have his last name. He didn’t want her to hear the word ‘bastard’ during her life. “Her name will be Anna Hart.”

“
If you hadn’t come, I would have named it after Uncle Bark.”

“
You’re not serious,” he said. Could she have been that cruel? He didn’t want to believe it.

“
Is Uncle Bark here?” he asked.

“
Uncle Bark is dead,” she said.

Later, Robert asked Guan-jiah.
“Is it true that Uncle Bark is gone?”

“
Yes, Master. He died like a ripe fruit dropping from a tree. It was peaceful and natural, a good death.”

Losing Uncle Bark reminded him of his own mortal
ity and that life could end any time. He’d miss Uncle Bark and would never forget him. If it hadn’t been for that old man, Robert would already be dead. He would have killed himself or Ward would have done it.

Bark Hart
, he thought. It was a good name but not for his daughter. He looked at the timbers above his head. I am sorry, Uncle Bark. I’m sure you would understand that it would not be fair to Anna.

It didn’t take long for Anna to capture his heart. He forgot about his discomfort at giving the child his last name. Happy moments arrived when he held her and looked into her chubby face. He marveled at how tiny every part of her was. It thrilled him when she wrapped her hand around one of his fingers and held on.

He swore that he would never abandon
the child God gave him.

He trembled and a slight chill raced along the surface of his skin. Sta
rtled, he sucked in a breath and listened for something in the silence.

Surely, God was sending him a message.
If that is what it was, he had to be a good father.

Robert worked alongside everyone else wanting to impress Ayaou.

“
I protest,” cousin Weed said. “I cannot have a guest working as if he were a peasant.”

Robert detected approval in his eyes.
Cousin Weed looked like a younger Uncle Bark with the same features and leather skin.

“
I insist,” Robert replied. “It is my duty to share the work, and Chou Luk called me his son-in-law. Surely, I must earn the right to be part of this family.”

Cousin Weed put Robert to work pumping water out of the bilge or moving cargo on and off the junk.
Ayaou did sweaty, backbreaking work alongside him with Anna strapped to her chest.

Cousin Weed
’s junk had two large sails made of bamboo. Because the bamboo was so strong, there weren’t many ropes. The boat’s design reminded Robert of the interior structure of bamboo with multiple compartments separated by hatches and ladders. The stern was horseshoe-shaped. The bottom was flat with no keel.

Meals consisted of fish, seaweed and rice, while toasted wate
rmelon seeds were always available as a snack. Years later, he remembered the sound of Ayaou cracking the seeds as she squatted on the deck beside him.

When they worked together, he often took a strand of hair that had fallen into her eyes and tucked it behind an ear. In the past, she smiled when he did that. This time there was no response. She kept right on working as if nothing had happened.

His heart shriveled.

When the ten days ended, he had no choice but to return to Canton. “I should be going with you,” she said.

“
It’s too dangerous,” he replied. “We have Anna to think about now. Macao is a safer place for her. Most of China is dangerous what with the Taipings, bandits and the smaller rebellions here and there.”

“
I should be sharing the risk with you.” The spark he missed was back in her eyes, and he regretted leaving. She said, “Cousin Weed’s wife will take care of Anna. Have you forgotten that I fought beside you against the Longhaired Bandits and saved your life?”

“
My answer is still no,” he said, and walked away as he had in Canton. He felt her eyes staring at his back, and his stomach twisted itself into a painful knot as if he had eaten spoiled salt pork.

He wanted to hold her and tell her she could come with him, but his legs refused to cooperate. He kept walking until he was off the boat and ashore. He regretted that he hadn
’t spent enough time alone with her.

The last thing he saw was Guan-jiah standing aft watching him. His servant held Anna in his arms. He took her little hand and made it wave goodbye. When Ayaou did not appear, a stab of
deep pain and regret twisted his guts.

Guan-jiah was doing his job being a father to his child. The e
unuch was more of a man than he was.

Thinking like that was dangerous. As the man of the family, he had to earn the money. His job was in Canton, a place too dange
rous for the woman and child he loved.

Back in Canton, there were many sleepless nights where he thought of the Ayaou he’d known and loved in Ningpo. He lay awake on the narrow bunk in his cramped quarters while the sounds of rockets and rifle fire crackled in the distance. He dreamed of returning to Ningpo and the time when he had been teaching Shao-mei and Ayaou how to read.

Why couldn
’t life be like that all the time? he thought. The buzz-saw snore of the major in the next cubbyhole vibrated the wall between them and Robert covered his ears.

He remembered how Ayaou had helped guide his Chinese teacher, Master Ping, in the language lessons. He recalled with fondness the discussions late into the night that he had with the girls about the meanings buried in the books and poems they read together.

What he missed most was the sound of Ayaou’s voice—of her singing in the morning when she cooked.

He wondered if he would live to see Ayaou and Anna again.
He wrapped the pillow around his head to cover his ears. He couldn’t even be miserable. The major’s snoring intruded on his suffering.

Chapter 36

A few months before Robert went to Canton, Master Tee Lee Ping taught him about China’s dynasties. They met at the house in Ningpo where the lessons took place.

“
My mind is famished,” Robert said.

Tee Lee Ping arranged his robe and sat on the bench in the parlor.
“You are not talking about food.” His nose wrinkled. He sniffed. The crackle of oil popping and the scent of ginger and garlic came from the kitchen.

“
No.”

“
However, I am,” Ping replied. “Your concubine is a great cook. I love simple food soaked with flavor.”

Robert smiled.
“That’s why she’s cooking. I’m going to squeeze you dry tonight. I want to deviate from our regular literature and language lesson. I want to know about China’s dynasties.”

“
So, once again, I must go beyond improving your perfect pronunciation of Mandarin.”

“
Yes.”

“
Good, I will earn the meal Ayaou is cooking.” He smacked his lips.

“
I’m counting on it.”

“
The first dynasty started with the Yellow Emperor thousands of years before the birth of your Jesus Christ,” Ping said. “No one knows if the Yellow Emperor really existed, because we have no writing from that time. Only myths.”

“
And how many dynasties were there if we count the Yellow Emperor?”

“
More than twenty.”

“
It sounds as if I’m not going to get my money’s worth. Should I tell Ayaou to stop cooking?”

“
Of course not.” Ping stuck his squashed nose in the air and sniffed. “My mouth is watering. We should move to the kitchen and eat while we talk.”

“
Only if you tell me about the Ch’ing Dynasty.”