nancy werlocks diary s02e15 (2 page)

I just shake my head.

* * *

I’m reviewing the paperwork Darla emailed me. The contract is straightforward though a bit more work than Lucian had let on (there is a surprise).
Demonology Today
, like most periodicals, is transitioning to a webzine. I get the distinct impression from Darla that Gladys’ retirement may have been “encouraged” due to the shift to digital format. Gladys was responding to three or four letters an issue, working with a two-month lead.  They want me to field two or three questions a week for the new online format, working with a two-week lead time. Currently, they will continue to produce the print magazine and just use answers from the webzine for the print column.

Mom had suggested that I call Gladys directly to discuss what she was being paid. Fortunately, Mom knew her personally and had her number in her old phone book. They had met years ago at the Augustus Symposium Daemonium, held every six years in Berlin, Germany, and kept in touch.   So after my chat with Gladys, I pushed back on Darla and informed her that I did not intend to do more work than Gladys and get paid less than she was being paid.  She tried to convince me that it was a great “opportunity for exposure.”

I told her that if I wanted to “expose” myself, I’d live at a nudist colony.

Apparently, Lucian is rather insistent that I take over the column, as Darla later called me back and agreed to my rate. This both makes me feel valued and reinforces the nagging feeling that he is up to something. I just don’t know what.

“Your bio sucks,” says Houston.

“Reads like a normal bio, mate,” says Eric. The two are oh-so-helpfully supporting this newest endeavor by offering unsolicited advice.

“See, that’s the problem,” says Houston between bites of dinner. “It reads like a normal bio. Most people don’t care about when Nancy earned Rank Five or that she has a doctorate. And the people who do care already know all of that. It is all on her WitchNet profile. We need to sex this up some.”

“Really?” I glare at him over the contract.

“You need a new profile picture, too, by the way.”

“What’s wrong with my profile picture?”

“It’s like a hundred years old. What is that, your high school yearbook photo?” He holds up his phone and shows me my profile page.”

“That’s the same photo I used for my counseling practice. That was professionally taken.”

“Like a hundred years ago. They have digital cameras now.”

“It’s not a bad photo,” says Eric. “But now would be a good time to freshen it up since you are going to be a celebrity.”

“Maybe you're right.” Okay, it
is
an old photo. I was still in my twenties when it was taken.

“Glamour Shots,” says Houston. “They’ll do your hair and makeup and get you all dolled up. Risha just updated her profile after a photo shoot.” He shows me Risha’s profile picture. Personally, the photo looks more like some glam ad for Maybelline than a professional profile photo.

“I’ll probably just use a traditional photographer, but thanks.”

“They do more professional sittings, too,” says Eric. He points to Houston. “I think your girl got some referral code or something for a discount Nancy can use, ya?”

“Oh yeah, hold on.” He closes his eyes for a moment. “Yeah, she said the code is 20% off.”

“Okay. Fine. Ask Risha to send me the code.”

“Sure,
I
suggest something, you’re all hellfire bolts shooting out of your eyes. Eric suggests the same thing, and you’re ‘Okay. Sounds good.’” Houston pretends to sulk.

“Maybe because Eric is polite,” I say.

“Eric isn’t polite. He’s British. His accent just makes him
sound
polite.”

Bloody Hell, mate! I’m sitting right here!”

I’m saved from their brotherly bickering by the phone ringing. It’s the Archmage from the Evocation Academy.

“Hey, Lawrence. Do I have you to thank for recommending me to the Magus?”

“What? Magus…you mean Lucian?”

“Oh, sorry. I assumed you were the one that recommended me.”

“Recommended you for what?” His nervousness makes me nervous.

“Um, Lucian Magus offered me Gladys Tembro’s column in
Demonology Today
. Gladys is retiring.”

I hear a sigh of relief on the other end of the line. “Oh, well, congratulations, then. No, that wasn’t me. But you certainly are qualified for it. I didn’t realize Lucian was so…hand’s on…with the publication. Did he…contact you directly?”

“He called me earlier to make the offer.”

“I see.”

“Lawrence, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Sorry. I was actually calling about Amy. Now that the situation with the gremlins is dealt with, I assumed you would want to pass him off to the guild.”

Amy is a demon bound to an antique pocket watch. Houston and I found him while investigated an alleged haunted house issue. Turns out the previous owner of the house had been an untrained adept who dabbled in magic above his pay grade. By some miracle, he had managed to bind the demon to the watch but was never able to really control it so he sealed it off in a hidden room in the basement. It is the sort of thing that should have immediately been handed off to the guild to deal with, but they were overrun by gremlins reproducing faster than rabbits. So I’ve been demon-sitting.

“Yes, Amy is looking forward to trying to manipulate his way to freedom, I’m sure. Do you want me to drop him off or will someone pick him up?”

“I can have a courier pick him up from the shop in the morning if that works for you.”

“Done deal. One less thing on my plate.”

“Good. I fear we’ve imposed on you a great deal more than we should have already. I’m happy to put this responsibility back where it belongs.”

“Lawrence, you know that despite my complaining to the contrary, I’m always happy to help when I can.”

“I know. But we shouldn’t call on you as much as we have. I’ll try to make sure we bother you less, particularly know that you have a column to write.”

“Well, if I don’t talk to you before then, have a Happy Thanksgiving.”

“You do the same. And…and do give Lucian my regards when you speak again.”

I hang up with an all-too-familiar uneasy feeling that someone is not telling me something.

Psych Evals

November 11
^th
,

It is well after 10 PM when Palatine Christopher Ross knocks on the front door. Houston unlocks the door and lets him in.

“Sorry I’m late, Doctor Werlock. As usual, some of the Bans don’t know when to shut up. Your apprentice, I presume?”

“Yes, this is Houston. Houston, Palatine Ross of the Philadelphia Blood Court.”

Houston squares his shoulders before shaking Chris’ hand. “I’ll be working on the inventory if you need me,” he says to me.

“Don’t be silly. Go home,” I tell him. “There is nothing in the inventory room that can’t wait until morning.”

“
I am not leaving you alone with a vampire!”
he thinks to me.

“Go…home.”

“But—”

I point at the door.

“Seriously? What if he attacks you?”

“If he tries to attack me, I’ll set him on fire.”

“But what if he has some weird mind control?”

“I’m sure he does. If your mother couldn’t break me, a vampire isn’t going to.”

“I’m not leaving. He thinks you’re hot. What would Lee think?”

“Are you reading his surface thoughts?”

“Of course!”

“GO HOME!”

The Palatine cocks an eyebrow at the two of us. I hold up my hands in apology. “I’m sorry, Chris. He’s—”

“—Concerned that I’m going to eat you. I get it.” He places the file box on the counter and turns to Houston. “If it makes you feel any better, if I was going to kill her, I would have killed you first because I never leave witnesses.”

“That…doesn’t make me feel better.”

Chris looks at me and shrugs. “I tried.”

“Go home, Houston. He’s worked with Steve and other Justicars in the past. I’ll be fine.”

“Eric is at the house, so if something goes wrong we can be here in thirty seconds.”

“I didn’t know he could teleport with others yet.”

“He hasn’t actually done it yet, but Gregor’s been teaching him the theory.”

“Yeah, just stay home.” The last thing I need is Eric practicing his mass teleportation with Houston and the two of them accidentally ending up in Guam or something.

A few weeks ago, the Palatine of the regional vampire Blood Court asked me to review some files for him and provide psych evaluations. At the time, I was up to my armpits dealing with the entire drama with Vivika. But considering the generous compensation he was offering, I told him once I cleared some things out of the way I would help him.

A Palatine is the vampire equivalent of a Justicar. They police vampire society and deal with potential breaches to the Veil. A few years ago, there was a massive near-breach when some vampire cult got the bright idea to reveal the truth about vampires to the world because they thought that was what God wanted. Apparently, they were wrong because God didn’t help them when the Blood Court put them down.

I lead Chris into my office and he pulls the files out of the file box.

“So, are you going to actually tell me what I should be looking for?” I ask as I sit down.

“The Prince believes we need more eyes during the day. The situation a few years ago escalated quickly because we didn’t have people in place to actually see it. But he doesn’t want more ghouls. Maintaining too many ghouls becomes…problematic.”

“I’m not a Necromancer, so I don’t really know what is involved in creating a ghoul beyond feeding a human vampire blood.”

“That is the primary part of it. Obviously, we don’t replenish our own blood. So to feed our blood to humans requires first feeding ourselves. The more ghouls you need to maintain, the more blood you need to consume. Too many ghouls and you spend most of the night trying to feed yourself in order to maintain your ghouls, which defeats part of the purpose of having ghouls in the first place.”

“That makes sense. But there is more to it.”

“That’s the main part you need to be concerned with.”

“You know, the more information I have, the more accurate the information I can give you.”

“The Prince is already…displeased…that I’m bringing you in on this. He understands the necessity, but doesn’t want me revealing more than I need to”

“Okay, now that the official disclaimer is out of the way, what else do I need to know?”

Chris smiles sheepishly. “Steve warned me not to try to hide much from you.” He rubs his hands through his hair. “I suppose you could probably get the information out of the Necromancers, anyway. Ghouls are useful, but over time, the longer the average person is a ghoul, the less…independent they become. The bond creates a, how do I explain? Um…”

“Co-dependent relationship?”

“That is a good term. It can sometimes become crippling for a ghoul. They become so obsessed with keeping the master happy that they will go to great lengths to avoid anything that might be a disappointment. Even if that means telling the master what they think the master
wants
to hear instead of what the master
needs
to hear. And the truth is, too often the master just wants a compliance Yes-man, anyway. But for the current situation, we need people capable of thinking independently, who can make hard choices and won’t be handicapped by fear of upsetting their master.

“At the same time, ghouls are easy to control, usually. They are aware of the supernatural world and aren’t going to themselves become potential risks. Not just because they don’t want to displease their masters, but also because they want to preserve their own power. I’m sure even a demonologist understands ghouls have a few perks over mundanes.”

“So you need people to do the work of policing vampires who aren’t actually beholden to vampires.”

“You understand this is a problematic situation.”

“You’ve worked with Justicars in the past. Why not see about arranging a more permanent working relationship?”

“Sharing information on a common enemy is one thing. But what do you think would happen the first time a Justicar kills a vampire on my authority, no matter how justified?”

“A fair point. But a more formal, cooperative relationship would probably alleviate some issues.”

“I don’t disagree. But getting the Blood Court to agree to anything is…let’s just that isn’t going to happen anytime soon.”

“So the people involved in this are going to be given information on vampires, which makes them a risk by default. And what kind of authority are they going to have?”

“At first, not much. Mostly basic investigation. Coordinating with contacts and accessing places that can only be handled during the day. Eventually, having a strike team that can move on rogue vampires when they are most vulnerable would be extremely useful.”

“And something I suspect would make certain vampires very uncomfortable.”

“Which brings up another problem. Without becoming a ghoul, these people aren’t going to have any particular protection from vampire abilities. They are just humans. Weak minds are susceptible to mind control. Even strong minds have a hard time resisting depending on the particular talents of the vampire. The last thing I need is to give a bunch of mortals weapons and knowledge about vampires, only to have them turned on me.”

“Chris, I don’t know if I can really give you the type of eval you need just from reading files. Even if I could examine the subjects directly, that wouldn’t give you a guarantee that they would be strong-minded enough for what you are asking.”

“I know, but I was hoping you could point me in the direction of someone who could. Help me narrow down the field, so to speak, and then refer me up the chain.”

“Wait a minute, what do you mean by ‘up the chain’?”