Nantucket Romance 3-in-1 Bundle (65 page)

“Hi, Kate,” Jamie said, a genuine smile on her face, and maybe a touch of pity in her eyes.

Roy shut the oven door and turned, offering her a nod and a reserved smile. Kate noticed his hands trembling for the first time and recognized it as a Parkinson’s symptom. Guilt pricked her hard. As if the Wrights didn’t have enough grief, she had made things worse.

“Is Brody around?” Kate asked. He was back from college for the weekend, and she hoped he hadn’t left already.

“He went for a walk,” Roy said. “Have a seat, Kate.”

“No, thanks,” Kate said. “I won’t stay. I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am.”

“I should think so,” Susan said.

“Give her a chance.” Roy pinned his wife with a look. “Go ahead, Kate.”

Where should I start?
There had been so much deception, and now the entire family was being publicly embarrassed. “I’m sure you’re aware that my original fiancé backed out of the wedding on our wedding day. I can’t begin to tell you how devastated I was. When Lucas offered to stand in, I thought it was crazy at first.”

Kate tucked her hair behind her ears. “And then it began to seem like the only sane solution. With my book releasing the same day, I realized it would sink like an anchor if my wedding didn’t go off as planned, and with all the media there to cover it—well, I guess I took the coward’s way out.”

Susan crossed her arms. Roy leaned his elbows on the island beside Jamie and studied Kate, the leathery lines around his eyes deepening.

“I never expected the truth to get leaked to the press. Lucas and I were going to divorce quietly after a year—we had it all planned. Obviously, everything’s changed now.”

Kate’s throat was dry as desert sand. She wet her lips. “I take full responsibility, and I’m sorry for the embarrassment I’ve caused. I’m leaving the island this afternoon, but I wanted to let you know that you’ve become very special to me.”

Jamie’s eyes turned glassy and she blinked rapidly. Roy’s face had softened, and Kate’s own eyes burned. Even Susan seemed to lose some of her starch. That might change by the time Kate was finished.

Memories of the past few months flew through Kate’s head at digital speed. The first time she’d met the Wrights, when she and Lucas had returned from their honeymoon. The time they’d come to watch her on
Dr. Phil
. All the walks with Susan. They were the family Kate never had, and she’d miss them. Even Susan.

Her throat thickened. “Thanks for opening your home to me. It was truly an honor to become part of your family, even if only for a little while.”

Jamie jumped up and hugged her. “I’ll miss you, Kate.”

Kate returned the embrace. “Me too, Jamie. You’re the sister I never had.”

When they parted, Roy embraced her. “I wish you didn’t have to go.”

Kate wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders and spoke around her closed throat. “It’s for the best. Thanks for all those home-cooked meals.”

There was a moment of awkwardness as she faced Susan. “Can I have a word with you in private, Susan?” Kate asked.

Susan gave a short nod, her styled hair bouncing, and Kate followed her into the foyer. The woman turned to her and crossed her arms over her chest. The overhead light was harsh on the woman’s face, making her appear older than her years.

Kate tempered her words with grace. “I wanted to talk to you about my mom.”

Susan’s jaw went slack; then she pressed her rosy lips together and looked away. “Lucas shouldn’t have told you.”

Kate shrugged. “I asked him why you didn’t like me, and he felt he owed me an explanation.”

“I don’t want to talk about this with—”

“You don’t have to say a word; just let me say my piece. Please.” It was the last time Kate would see her anyway. The woman needed to hear the truth from someone, and if her own family wouldn’t say it, Kate would.

“What my mom did was wrong. I don’t know if she ever apologized, but it’s too late for her to say it now, so I’ll say it for her.” Kate waited until Susan met her gaze. “I’m sorry. It was a terrible thing for a friend to do.”

Kate wondered if it would help for Susan to know the misery her mom had gone on to endure. A failed marriage and a battle with alcoholism. Not to mention a premature death. Kate had dreamed of the kind of childhood Susan had provided her kids.

Kate could’ve sworn she saw a filmy glaze on Susan’s eyes.

“I’m sure Roy regrets it as well,” Kate continued. “And I hope somewhere along the way, he’s found the words to tell you that.”

“Saying you’re sorry doesn’t erase the pain,” Susan choked out.

Boy, can I relate to that.
How many times had Bryan apologized? “I know.” She hoped Susan was remembering that Kate had her own heart broken not long ago. “But at some point you have to forgive the other person. It doesn’t mean what he did was okay. It just means you’re going to stop punishing him for it.”

Susan stood to her full height, her jaws hollowing as she sucked in her pale cheeks.

Kate was treading where she was unwelcome, but the woman had held the mistake over her husband’s head for over thirty years. Kate didn’t know how Roy had endured it.

“Well, that’s all I wanted to say,” Kate said. She knew Susan hadn’t wanted to hear it, especially not from her, but she hoped the woman took it to heart anyway.

Kate reached out and put her arms around Susan, feeling the stiffness of her shoulders, but embracing her regardless. “Thanks for all the walks, Susan. And for your hospitality.”

She felt Susan’s arms unfurl, felt her hands land on Kate’s arms. It was enough.

Kate pulled back and smiled. “I’ll try and catch Brody later. Will you let him know I’m looking for him?”

“Of course,” Susan said.

Kate said good-bye one final time and left the house. Her feet took the uneven porch steps before she cut through the yard to the grassy
knoll that separated their houses.

This is the last time you’ll see them. You’ll never sit down to a meal
on that insanely high rooftop or listen to Jamie and Brody tease one
another again. It’s over.

Somehow, in a few short months, the Wrights had wiggled their way into her heart. And now she was leaving.

The crisp autumn air washed across her face, tugging at the short strands of her hair. She crossed her arms against the coolness and looked toward the ocean, the direction she’d soon go. A movement on the beach below caught her eye.

Brody threw something into the water, walking backwards, then turned toward his house. Kate changed directions, aiming her feet toward him.

When she reached the place where the long grass gave way to the sandy shore, Brody saw her. He stopped at the steps leading up from the beach, waiting for her approach. The wind pulled at his white T-shirt and tousled his blond curls.

“Hi,” Kate said over the sound of the waves lapping the shore-line. “I was just at your house.”

Brody nodded, his guarded smile reminding her of Roy’s.

“I came to say I’m sorry,” she said. “Sorry about deceiving your family. I never meant to hurt anyone, but I realize I have.”

Brody dug his bare feet into the sand. “It wasn’t right.”

“I know,” Kate said. “I’m not going to offer excuses.” A seagull soared above the water and cried out—a lonely, high-pitched squeal. “I also came to tell your family good-bye.”

Brody met her gaze, his eyes flinching for just a second. She watched the emotions dancing across his face. He’d never been good at hiding his feelings. “I didn’t think you’d leave.”

She shrugged, turning her face into the wind, letting her hair blow off her face. “Everyone knows the truth now. There’s no reason for me to stay.”

Brody studied her, his head cocked to the side. “Isn’t there?”

His tone held a challenge, but she wouldn’t take it.
There are
things he doesn’t know, doesn’t understand. How can he?

“How are things going this semester?” she said. “If you don’t mind my asking.”

The pause was so long, Kate thought he wasn’t going to answer. When he finally did, she was relieved.

“You were right,” he said. “About my being afraid to fail.” He smiled and she saw a glimpse of the old Brody. “If you tell anyone that I’ll have to come after you.”

Kate held up her right hand, palm out. “I promise.”

Brody sank onto the sandy wooden step, and Kate eased down beside him.

“Teaching is what I want to do,” he said. “I think switching from major to major was a stall tactic because I was afraid I’d get out in the real world and fail. If you hadn’t shown me that, I would have been a college student the rest of my life.”

Kate breathed a laugh. “Nah, you would’ve figured it out.”

“Yeah, when I was thirty and on my tenth major.”

Kate was glad something positive had come from her time here, because everything else was a disaster.

Silence fell again. The seagull flapped its wings, flying away, growing smaller on the horizon.

“I’m still afraid,” Brody said. “I guess that makes me a total wuss.”

Kate traced a dry crevice in the step with her index finger. “It’s fear that makes an act courageous, you know.”

Brody drew in the sand with his big toe. “Huh. Never thought of it like that.”

“You’ll make a great teacher, Brody. I hope we can stay in contact.” Kate huddled against the cool wind, tucking her knees close to her.

“Sure. There’s always e-mail.” He looked at Kate. “What about Lucas?”

Her heart wobbled at the mention of Lucas’s name. “I suppose e-mail is out for him, huh? I guess we can keep in touch by phone.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

He wasn’t playing the part of Kate’s brother-in-law now; he was a little brother watching out for big brother. She envied Lucas having a sibling that looked out for him.

“Lucas will be fine,” Kate said. “It—it wasn’t like that between us.”

The words felt soiled coming out. It may have been true at one time, but not after the night before.

It hasn’t been true for weeks.

“It’s best that I leave.” What would happen to her heart if she stayed? She’d already lost it to Lucas, and what hope did they have for a future together?

Brody nodded thoughtfully.

Kate let silence fill the space between them, let the sound of the surf rushing the shoreline fill the gap.

“Well,” he said, “at least you won’t have to fight your fear of heights anymore.”

Kate smiled, remembering all the rooftop meals they’d shared. She elbowed Brody. “Fear of
falling
,” she corrected.

Brody’s expression changed, growing serious. “You know, a wise person once told me it’s fear that makes an act courageous.”

Kate’s breath caught in her lungs as Brody held her captive with his pointed look. He knew. He knew she cared for Lucas. Thought she was a coward for running.

But sometimes, running was the courageous thing to do. At least, that’s what she told herself.

Lucas was gone by the time Kate returned home. She realized he must’ve gone to his parents’ house while she was on the beach with Brody. Kate made reservations on that evening’s car ferry and packed her belongings. Everything would fit in the car except her treadmill. She’d have to send for it and her things from the apartment when she found a place in Maryland.

For tonight, she’d take the ferry to Hyannis then drive as far as Wareham or New Bedford, then find a hotel. She called her dad and told him she was coming.

By late afternoon, she was wondering if she was going to have to track Lucas down. She had to leave soon if she wanted to make the ferry, but she owed him a good-bye at least.

Kate was packing her laptop and cord when she heard Lucas return. He opened the door, and his eyes landed on her suitcases. He paused for a moment before shutting the door.

Kate wrapped the recharging cord around the battery pack and stowed it in her bag with the laptop, then zipped it shut.

Lucas pocketed his keys and leaned against the sofa back. Rather than focus on him, she looked at the sofa itself. How many nights had they sat on that couch, disagreeing about what program they should watch? Kate had learned it was easier to read in the evenings because they could never settle on a show.