New Title 1 (24 page)

Noelle felt sick, she had just escaped one close call with Julez with the whole Kira thing, and now McKenzie had thrown more salt in the game. She couldn't blame her, she was just a child, but Noelle knew that if Kira ever uttered anything to Julez, with this new conversation, he would definitely be suspicious. She had to pull out the big guns. It was almost fate the more she thought about it.

“
Well, baby...” she started. “I wanted to talk to you about it in private first. But I guess since Kenz is here, and J, well you're just like family to us, too...” Noelle shot Jordin a warm and phony smile before looking back to Julez. “Papi...I'm...I'm pregnant. I'm having your baby. I was just so upset because you weren't around for me to share the news with, and I was hoping you would be happy.”

Julez dropped his jaw in pure shock as she rattled off. Noelle knew how bad Julez wanted a child of his own, the news had him thrilled. But only a tiny piece of his subconscious felt confusion.

“
Pregnant?” He repeated, standing up slowly. “You...you sure?”

Noelle's heart raced as she nodded. This was fucked up.

“
Yes, yes I'm sure. Well...are you happy?”

A smile grew on his face as he looked from Noelle to Jordin, and then back to Noelle.

“
Of course! Of course, mami. Come here.”

He gave his wife a big hug and knew that this was it. Noelle was pregnant, and she was his wife, and this was the way it was. And since this was the way the cards fell, then this was the way it was supposed to be. More than anything, he would finally have a child of his own. How could he not be ecstatic?

He used his other arm to grab McKenzie and bring her into their family embrace. The three of them shared their moment.

Jordin stood on the side feeling more like an outsider than she had ever. What was this aching feeling? She was happy for Noelle. She had always been happy for Noelle, why would this time be any different?

She contemplated if it was because she herself had tried so hard to get pregnant with Slim. She wanted a child so bad, and she had convinced herself that it was something wrong with her. That had to be why she felt a little jealous.

Or was it something else? Was it because she knew that this baby would only strengthen Julez and Noelle's marriage? Was it because she knew that whatever little juvenile attraction him and her may have shared, in no way could it compare to the dynamics of Noelle carrying his first born. Either way, she knew that she had better get over it, quick. Noelle and Julez deserved this, they deserved to be happy.

As Jordin threw on a warm smile over her disappointment, Noelle looked around at everyone's happy faces. She knew the questions about her and Slim downstairs were now an afterthought. She had succeeded at diminishing them with this huge H-bomb that she had dropped. However, she had a new hole that she had just dug herself into and she wasn't sure how she would get out.

When Slim found out that she was keeping this baby, he would never agree to let her raise it as Julez's knowing that it could possibly be his. And now with him leaving Jordin, he really had nothing to lose, he could tell it all. Noelle didn't want him blowing up their spot. She had to talk to him immediately.

All of Whose Children?

“
Get the fuck outta here!”

“
But Slim, just listen...”

“
Get the fuck off of me, Noelle!” He yelled, snatching his arm from her. It was the next day, early in the afternoon, and Noelle had called Slim over to talk. She knew that Jordin was at work and Kenzie was in school so this was the perfect opportunity to tell Slim about her new plans. Or at least try to convince him to see things her way.

“
Slim...baby...you can...you can see the baby whenever you want. I'll bring it to see you, if...you know...if it's yours...”

“
It's mine!”

“
Okay! Okay... But listen, you know Julez wants a baby really bad. I can't tell him that it may not be his. You...you said you would do anything for me Slim. I need you, I need you now more than ever.”

Slim looked at her with his brows wrinkled in confusion. He couldn't help but chuckle before responding.

“
Yo, are you hearing yourself right now?” His dark skin tightened over his jaw line and his chest heaved in anger. “I'm really starting to think that you're fucking crazy, Noelle! You expect me to let you raise my child with another nigga? Just so you can stay in your big house... and drive your fucking cars! Wear your fucking diamonds and get ya dick on the side. Nah, it aint that...” He walked up on her and grabbed her by the face as tears began to form in her eyes. He forced her to look at him. “All this time Noe, you been saying it's the money. But that aint it. I'm getting money now. I got a crib. Yeah, it aint this,” he said taking a step back and waving his arms at the space around them. “But it's a decent crib, enough for us to be comfortable in. But you don't want that. You want
that
nigga. Just keep it real wit' me ma.”

Noelle began to cry, truly not understanding how she got here. What exactly
did
she want?

“
No, it's not that Slim. I love you. I want you, but I just want to keep things the way it is. It's easier this way. And Jordin...what about Jordin? What would happen if she found out?” She looked at Slim and a glimmer of sorrow appeared in his eyes. As if he had just considered Jordin's feelings in all of this. Noelle capitalized on the moment.

“
Even if I didn't stay with Julez, we couldn't just be together. That would kill Jordin. How do you think she would feel if she knew that this was probably your baby that I was carrying?” Noelle rattled off at him and Slim dropped his eyes to the ground deep in thought. She made sense but there was no way that he was letting her raise his kid with Julez. The last thing he wanted to do was to hurt Jordin though.

He lifted his head and his heart sank to his stomach as Noelle continued to speak through tears. With her back to the front door, she didn't see what he did.

“
I love you so much Slim! I wish I could just come and live with you and raise our baby, but it can't be that easy. I couldn't live with myself if I did that!”

Slim didn't respond, he just dropped his head. Shit was about to get ugly.

“
But you can live with yourself now, huh?”

Without turning around, Noelle shut her eyes tight and pressed her lips together. The breath left her body. That wasn't Slim's voice.

She knew this moment was coming all along, it was written, it always happened in these situations. However, you could never prepare yourself for the hurt, and the shame, and the weirdest, tiniest shred of relief that you feel once you've been caught.

She turned around slowly and took a deep breath as the tears flowed.

“
Jordin...”

“
Don't!” Jordin walked up close, too close, to Noelle and stared her venomously in the eyes. She wanted her to see all of the pain in her, if it were possible. “Don't you say my name you
fucking bitch
!”

Noelle's heart broke as she looked into Jordin's hurt-filled eyes. Up until this point she thought the love that she had for Slim was worth it all. But was it worth this? This was her
best friend
.

“
J, I am so...I am so sorry. Please...you have to believe me,” Noelle began to cry.

“
How could you!” The bass from Jordin's voice startled Noelle. Jordin covered her face with her trembling hands and let out a blood curling scream. “Aaarrggghhhh!”

“
Jordin, please,” Noelle pleaded, truly scared, as Slim just continued to hang his head, running his hand over his face. “We didn't-”

“
We?”
Jordin asked in disbelief. “No, you bitch! How the fuck could
you
do this to me, Noelle! Fuck
him!
” Jordin screamed, pointing at Slim. “He aint shit! He's just a nigga... But you...you were supposed to be my
sister
.” Jordin's voice cracked on the word sister as tears continued to fall. Her world felt like it was turned upside down, and the pain was unbearable. Images of her and Noelle throughout her whole life flooded her mind. Happy times, sad times, funny times, she had shared them all with her. When her family had turned their back on her, Jordin knew she had Noelle. Now, she had no one.

She thought of all of the times that Noelle had been around her and Slim and she felt like a fool. She felt like the world's biggest joke.

Jordin began screaming in Noelle's face like a madwoman, her sorrow turning into rage.

“
My fucking sister! No, fuck that! We were supposed to be better than sisters! How could you? Answer me!”

Slim stepped up because he truly feared that Jordin was about to hit Noelle, and he knew that Noelle was pregnant. He had never seen Jordin this upset, even when he had left her. You could literally see the pain and anger written all over her.

“
Ma...Jordin...” he spoke. “J, look, I'm sorry. I feel fucked up about the way things went down. I mean, we both feel fucked up, me and Noe...”

At the mention of him and Noe, Jordin sent her right foot out into a kick, connecting with Slim’s groin with great force. The blow caused him to stagger a bit and grab his balls in shock. He knew he deserved it.

Before he could recoup, Jordin served up a second attack on Noelle, this time with a punch, her fist landing hard on Noelle's cheek and hitting her jaw hard. Noelle had to breathe deep not to react out of instinct as pain shot through her head and blood filled her mouth. She held her face and cried, deciding that Jordin was owed that blow.

“
Jordin please...please forgive me. It just happened...I didn't mean to....”

Noelle was crying so hard; she felt like true and total shit.

Jordin stood there and looked at Noelle sobbing, as she held her now swollen cheek and continued to apologize. She looked so pathetic, Jordin couldn't help but to laugh out of disbelief. She was so hurt, too hurt, all she could do was laugh about it.

She thought of McKenzie's story about the other night. She thought of Kira's warnings at the dinner party. She even thought of Julez, and how she obviously was in a way attracted to him, but would have never done this to Noelle. It caused her to look at the both of them in disgust.

“
You know what? Both of y'all deserve each other. Neither one of you is worth shit, and I'm just mad it took me this long to realize it.”

She walked up to Slim as Noelle continued to sob and she looked him dead in the eyes.

“
And you know what
Slim?
I may not be the sexiest girl in the world. I may not have the smallest waist, or the flattest stomach, and I may not dress like I'm heading out to the strip every night...” She shot a look at Noelle. “But I'm a
good
woman, with a good heart. And one day I'm gonna meet a good man...and that's gonna be enough for him.”

She held eye contact with him for a few seconds as he let her words digest. Then she gave them both one final look.