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Authors: Jane Harvey-Berrick

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“I have no clue,” I lied.

 

“He is a rude man,” concluded Marc. “He is certainly no gentleman.”

 

I had to agree
, but the thought saddened me. Ten years ago, Sebastian had been the gentlest of souls. I couldn’t help thinking back to his many acts of kindness towards me. Well, that had been a long time ago: it was obvious that he detested me now.

 

I decided that I
’d done as much as I could: if he didn’t want to talk to me that was his prerogative. I wouldn’t push it. Besides, this wretched training would be over soon, and I hoped to be on my way to Leatherneck within the next two or three days. I’d contacted my editor, and he’d promised to make some calls on my behalf to get things moving.

 

It seemed my last chance to talk to Sebastian had gone already, because he didn
’t return after lunch for the end of the training. No comment was made about his absence, but I got the feeling that the British officers were relieved he’d disappeared.

 

“So, I hope you found the last two days useful,
Ms. Venzi,” said Major Parsons, as I was packing up my bag.

 

“Most informative,” I said, blandly.

 

“Glad to hear it,” he said, a twinkle in his eye. “Did you actually learn anything new?”

 

“I have doubled my vocabulary in Dari and Pashto,” I replied.

 

He looked puzzled.

 

“I didn
’t know you had spoken any before?” he said.

 

“I hadn
’t.”

 

He grinned as he caught the gist of my
meaning.

 

“I see! Well, perhaps I can make up for your lack of progress by buying you a drink tonight?”

 

Oh. I wasn’t expecting that
.

 

“That
’s very kind of you, Major, but I have some notes to prepare. It has been a pleasure meeting you.”

 

He took my rejection well, returning my handshake with just the right amount of pressure.

 

“Good luck out there,” he said seriously. “Keep your head down: I’d hate to hear that anything had happened to you.” He hesitated for a moment. “Perhaps we could meet up – next time you’re in Geneva – or in fact anywhere in Switzerland. I’ll be in this post for the next six months at least.”

 

“Well, thank you
. I don’t have any plans to be in the country again, but I’ll certainly make a note of that.”

 

At which point he resigned the field
, and left with his dignity intact – and my opinion of him rose even higher.

 

“You are not interested, Lee?” said Marc, a knowing look on his face.

 

“What’s the point?” I sighed. “I won’t be in Switzerland again for months, if ever.”

 

“You could just take him for a quick ride – see what his rising trot is like,”
Liz smirked.

 

I rolled my eyes. One-
night stands had never been my thing, and what I’d said was true: there was no point in starting such a long-distance relationship. Apart from which, I’d have been a fool to get mixed up with another military man after my disastrous marriage.

 

We headed to the bar and spent the evening with some of the other journalists, swapping tall tales about some of the locations we
’d reported from. Liz’s tales were by far the tallest – although in her case, I was willing to bet they were all true.

 

Shortly before midnight, I headed back to my hotel, feeling in a much better mood. I still hadn
’t heard back from my editor during the day, but I was hopeful I’d be on the move soon.

 

I threw off my clothes and showered quickly
, before checking my emails again. Still no word about my ride to Leatherneck. Annoying – but I wasn’t going to worry just yet.

 

I programmed my cell to wake me in the morning and turned off the light, hoping against hope that I might actually get some sleep.

 

I was woken abruptly when someone banged on my bedroom door. I scrunched up my eyes and peered at my phone.
Jeez! Two in the morning.
Who the hell was knocking on my door at this hour?

 

Grumpily
, I switched on the bedside lamp, squinting against the light, and fumbled for my robe.

 

“Who is it?”

 

“Let me in, Caro.”

 

No one
had called me ‘Caro’ in years; in fact, only one person had
ever
used that version of my name. And I knew his voice – except the tone was off.

 

Surprise and shock made my heart rate spike suddenly.

 

“What do you want, Sebastian?” I called through the door.

 

“Let me in,” he mumbled again.
“I need to talk to you.”

 

Now
he wanted to talk?

 

He banged on the door again. “Caro!”

 

At this rate he’d been waking up the entire hotel.
God, he was irritating. And his sense of timing was lousy.

 

Reluctantly, but curious
nonetheless, I pulled the door open.

 

Sebastian was leaning against the door frame, deliciously rumpled in old jeans
, black T-shirt and a brown leather jacket. Irritating
and
gorgeous.

 

“Caro,” he said, a leer on his face.

 

Oh hell. And also
very
drunk.

 

“What do you want, Sebastian?”

 

He didn’t answer, but pushed past me into my room.

 

“What are you doing?” I said, my temper rising.

 

“Catching up with old friends,” he smirked

 

“How did you find me?”

 

He grinned and tapped the side of his head with one long finger, “Military intelligence.”

 

I closed the door, hoping that
no one had seen or heard his noisy entrance into my room. But the hotel corridor was silent.

 

He
fumbled out of his jacket and tossed it towards the chair, missing by a mile. I couldn’t help noticing that his T-shirt was snug on his body in a way that brought back too many memories.

 

He sat down on the bed
, and patted the space next to him, suggestively.

 

“Come and sit with me, Caro,” he slurred.

 

Oh, I really didn’t think so
.

 

I
folded my arms across my chest and stayed standing. His gaze drifted up and down me in a way that heated my whole body. I hadn’t blushed like that in a long time.

 

“Why are you here, Sebastian?
You had your chance to talk to me earlier today, but you preferred to ignore me.”

 

He blinked up at
me, his sea-green eyes puzzled. It was strange seeing him so far from the ocean. Then he smiled again.

 

“You
still have a great ass, Caro.”

 

Enough was enough.

 

“Okay, I think you’d better go now. Whatever you have to say to me can wait until you’re sober.”

 

He just sat there smiling at me. I decided to make the hint more obvious. I walked forward to pull him off the bed
, but instead he leaned forwards, wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my chest. This was getting ridiculous: couldn’t the man take ‘no’ for an answer? And I certainly didn’t want to be part of any harem.

 

“Sebastian, stop that
,” I said forcefully. “I want you to go. Now!”

 

But he increased his grip
, and his shoulders started to shake. With something like horror, I realized he was crying.

 

“Why didn
’t you come back?” he sobbed. “I waited and waited for you, like I said I would, but you never came back! Why? Why didn’t you come back? I love you I love you I love you.”

 

I was
stunned. No. This was not what I’d expected at all. And then I wondered if all his apparent dislike, all the rudeness he’d shown me, was just a wall protecting him from the pain I’d put him through; a rejection that had lasted years. He still loved me?

 

Oh no
.

 

He couldn
’t mean it. No, it was the alcohol talking.

 

“Sebastian…” I began.

 

He clutched me tighter and started kissing my chest, pulling open my robe and exposing my breasts. He fastened his mouth over my nipple and began to tug gently with his teeth.

 

I tried to push him away.

 

“No!”

 

But he didn
’t stop. He pulled me onto the bed and pushed himself on top of me, kissing my throat and breasts over and over. He was so strong, I couldn’t fight him off; his arms held my wrists and his body was heavy, crushing me into the mattress.

 

“Get off me!” I yelled at him,
dragging my hands free and pushing at his chest with all my strength.

 

With a long sigh, he rolled onto his back and was still.

 

I sat up, shocked and afraid. I pulled my robe together and stared at him. He was fast asleep, passed out drunk and snoring softly.

 

I was shaking from
a fear-fueled adrenaline rush.

 

I shoved him with my hand.

 

“Sebastian, wake up! Wake up!”

 

He mumbled something and rolled onto his side.

 

Shit. Just what I
didn’t
need.

 

I wondered what the hell to do. If I phoned for help, everyone would just assume we
’d slept together. I didn’t want to ruin my already dented reputation; and if I reported his assault, he’d be arrested and court-martialed, with the distinct possibility that our illicit past would be uncovered.

 

No matter how far I trave
led, no matter how hard I worked, I was never able to outrun my past. The thought made me cold with fury.

 

In the end
, I decided the simplest thing to do was to leave him as he was. He certainly wasn’t going to be making any more passes at me in that condition, and a small but insistent part of me remembered that we’d once been in love.

 

I wrestled his heavy biker boots off his feet and
pulled the duvet over him. I definitely wasn’t going to sleep naked like I usually did, so I hunted down a loose T-shirt, pulled on a pair of panties and crawled back into bed.

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