New York Christmas (7 page)

“I’m never here,” he said. He shrugged. “Well, not here long enough to make a mess. I eat, sleep, and breathe work I guess.”

“That’s real dedication.”

“There’s nothing else I wanted before.” Daniel moved slightly, sitting more upright, then he widened his arms. “Come here.”

Chris hesitated for a second or two, not quite understanding what he was being asked to do, then just as quickly he got with the program. As carefully as he could, aware his general clumsiness made his knees a danger to Daniel’s dick, he straddled Daniel’s lap and squirmed slightly to get comfortable. There wasn’t any real awkwardness; Chris leaned in, Daniel leaned up, and the kiss was electrifying. Lust sparked like a match to tinder, his dick hard, the need to push down only just held in check. Daniel groaned low in his throat as he deepened the embrace and slid both hands down to firmly cup Chris’s ass, encouraging Chris to scoot forward some more.

Chris was lost in the kiss; he could sit for hours just tasting this man, learning him, making him lose it hard. It seemed Daniel was well into that plan.

Daniel pulled back slightly, gasping for a lungful of air. “I didn’t have anyone,” he said, half closing his eyes, “it was easy to be dedicated to the job.” He would never

know how those words sent shivers down Chris’s spine. Chris buried both hands in silky curls, holding Daniel still, licking and biting his way into Daniel’s mouth, their tongues meeting and mating, the heat rising between them. They weren’t really even trying to get off, it was a lazy, uncomplicated make-out session, and Chris couldn’t remember one single occasion where he had ever done anything like this before. It had always been meet, fuck, goodnight, the end. This was different.

“Your glasses?” Daniel was asking a question, but it took a while for Chris to stop the exploration of Daniel’s neck with his tongue and lips.

“Sorry?” he managed to force out, blinking to focus on Daniel’s kiss-wet lips.

“You used to wear glasses. In college. I remember.” Shit, he was hoping Daniel had forgotten about the glasses. Horrible dark-rimmed nerdy spectacles that did nothing for him in any way.

Sudden shyness enveloped him. “Reading,” he said softly, “I just need them to read really.”

“I loved your glasses. You always looked so freaking hot in the library, all bookish and concentrating.”

Chris groaned. “I can’t believe, of all the things you remember, you had to remember my glasses.”

“Chris?”

“Hmmm?”

“Will you stay here tonight?”

Chris didn’t even have to think on the answer. “Yes,” he said quickly.

Daniel’s voice was low. “You know I had this fantasy way back when. I would go to the library after dark, and I would find you studying.” Chris eased off Daniel’s lap, adjusting himself so his stone-stiff dick pressing against his fly didn’t hurt as much.

Wondering what came next, Chris waited until Daniel had risen to his feet as well. The sudden halt to the whole making out business had thrown the proverbial bucket of ice water over Chris. He found himself thinking a little too clearly. He glanced over at the two lemon poppy seed muffins they had thought to have for dessert. There they sat, untouched, in the box emblazoned with
Amelia’s
on its top. This was surreal, it was going too fast. He needed to go now. Anxiety knotted in his chest, but Daniel was still talking and Chris forced himself to listen.

“You would be so buried in what you were learning, some dusty words spoken a hundred or more years ago.” Daniel flicked off the TV and the lights, then took Chris’s hand and led him through the room to the hall separating living space from sleeping.

Chris let himself be led and didn’t think for even one minute of pulling his hand away.

He was standing on the edge of something, ready to fall or fly. Whichever way it went, he needed this tonight. “Maybe it was Brönte, or Dante, or some contemporary tome that would have sent me to sleep in a heartbeat.”

“That doesn’t sound like the best fantasy in the world. I’m not seeing the sex angle there,” Chris murmured, trying to inject a lightness into the touch of Daniel’s words on his senses.

“But I haven’t finished the whole thing.” They reached the bedroom door and Daniel pushed it open. The soft blue LED glow from the alarm clock showed it was past

midnight and Daniel turned on the small bedside lamp. He smiled back at Chris, who hovered at the door. Daniel didn’t stop talking. Chris was mesmerized. “So we are all alone in the library, and I finally dredge up the courage to talk to you.”

“We talked all the time.” Bewildered, and clearly taking Daniel’s words at face value, Chris frowned a little.

“Grammar and sentence structure and meaning, never what I wanted to talk about. About how your brown-eyed expression was so thoughtful and that you have a speck of black in the brown of your left eye; about how I could imagine staring into those eyes all day. Feeling the need to write poetry about them. About you. I was so far gone.”

“Oh,” Chris replied faintly, allowing his shirt to slide off his shoulders after Daniel had gently unbuttoned it. The cool wash of air across his warm skin cascaded little shivers of sensation through his body.

“I needed, like breathing, to tell you how beautiful you were. How handsome, gorgeous, clever, cute you were—everything I wanted to say to you in real life but that I just held back.“ Hesitant movements from Chris pushed his own jeans away and down.

He knew that Daniel was removing his clothes—he didn’t want to stop it, and in a matter of minutes he was standing in front of Daniel just in his shorts. His panic surfaced so suddenly that it stole his breath, and he was unexpectedly angry at the lies Daniel was saying.

“You don’t need to—” The words snapped out louder than he’d intended. Gritting his teeth, he deliberately tried to relax each muscle. “You don’t need to make things up just to get me into bed. I’m here, aren’t I? I’m a sure thing.”

Daniel rocked back on his heels, a myriad of expressions sweeping across his face in quick succession: surprise, disbelief, and then, it seemed, acceptance. His hands had been fumbling with the belt of his own jeans, but he stopped. “I’m telling you the truth, Chris. Why can’t you believe me?”

“You had whoever you wanted, Daniel.” Chris had to make sense of what was happening. The disappointment in Daniel’s voice caught at him and he looked more closely at the tall man. “There was no way in hell you wanted me like I wanted you.”

“You’re wrong.” Gently, moving slowly and keeping his hands in plain sight, he eased Chris back onto the bed, helping him to scoot up before removing his own clothing quickly and efficiently. Finally he climbed up Chris’s body, marking his passing with sure, sweeping kisses. When he was laid half on top of him Daniel stopped, his lips only a breath away from Chris’s. He just stared, the look on his face thoughtful.

“I have a confession to make,” Daniel said. His tone was gentle.

That was it, Chris knew Daniel had been lying, and now he was going be told. He should just accept it, sleep with the guy and move on, trying to ignore the hurt that cut deep. If only Daniel would stop talking then they could just have sex and he could flush him out of his system once and for all.

“It doesn’t matter what you say now, whatever shit you pulled,” Chris said forcefully. “I don’t care. I just want you to fuck me.” Frustrated, he pushed up against Daniel, his hard dick finding the groove of thigh and groin. “Come on.”

Daniel stilled him, shifting his weight, pinning him to the bed, using one hand to hold himself steady, the other lacing in Chris’s hair. “Wait, you need to know I’m telling you the truth—I didn’t find you at Amelia’s by accident. I tracked you down.”

Chris frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I had made my choices, settled into the work I loved, got past the money and doing-nothing crap. Damn.” Daniel laughed softly. “I guess you could say I had found myself after all this time. And… I talked to your brother.”

“Andy? You—”

“I knew he worked at the
Times
, guessed he would be easier to track from there.

Googled him, talked to him. Just general stuff about catching up, and he said you weren’t with anyone. I used what he told me about Amelia’s and I went to a coffee shop that is clear across town from my precinct just to see if what I had felt in college was still there.” He dropped a gentle kiss on Chris’s lips and Chris closed his eyes. What Daniel was saying wasn’t—couldn’t be—right.

“Wait.” Chris pulled back against the soft pillows. “You tracked me down like some kind of crazy stalker dude.” Daniel nodded and had the grace to look a little ashamed, spoiled somewhat by the intention flashing in his heated gaze.

“I did, and I can tell you I would do it again, just to be here with you now.”

“Oh.” Chris really wanted to say more, but he had no words in his head. He waited for the anxiety to render him breathless. Nothing happened. He was fully here and completely focused, body and mind. Daniel with the gorgeous hazel eyes and the muscles on his muscles—had found him. Him!

“I don’t want to fuck,” Daniel offered into the silence, and instant disappointment chased away the positives in Chris’s head. A despairing emotion that was replaced almost immediately by warmth that flew through his body like wildfire at Daniel’s next words. “I want us to make love.”

There was sensation like no other, the half dark inviting and welcoming the two men and their need. It wasn’t particularly quick, but neither was it drawn out. It was kisses so deep and so long that they had to split for air. It was touching and tasting and erotic words. Chris was a near-pleading incoherent mess by the time Daniel had prepped him and moved to spoon him from behind. It had been such a long time— months—since he had been with someone, and he had never experienced such gentleness or want.

They rocked in rhythm, Daniel strong and forceful behind and Chris desperate for his lover to touch him. When he was close, the head of Daniel’s dick pressing against his gland on every pass, sending him higher, it was as if Daniel knew exactly when he should finally close his fingers around Chris. The counter-rhythm was incredible and he lost it in an instant, Daniel’s name on his lips and a rush of emotion in his head. Daniel thrust hard once more, then again, and then stiffened behind him, Chris’s name flowing from his lips over and over.

Sleep came so very quickly, and for the first time in a very long time, Chris had no worries or cares that made him wake in the dark.

Daniel had to leave for his next shift at nine in the morning and Chris remained in Daniel’s bed, warm with Daniel’s scent, evidence of their lovemaking and tangled sheets around him.

Daniel had gone with a kiss, a hug, affection and the promise of more, and he added that Chris should get breakfast there and have a shower. After Chris had used the shower and dressed, he decided he really needed to get back to Ame and the shop.

However much Daniel said it was okay, it didn’t seem right for him to be using Daniel’s stuff or eating his food.

Amelia didn’t say anything. She raised an eyebrow when he walked in through the café entrance, which was her way of asking the question. He smiled and then shrugged. Hopefully that was explanation enough for the walk of shame.

Wednesday, December 12th

“I’m not getting on ice skates,” Chris said firmly. Daniel grinned down at his new lover and decided there and then that he was really pushing this.

“You need to live a little,” he said. Chris frowned at him and then peered back onto the Wollman skating rink with more than a little trepidation added to horror.

“I don’t want to spend Christmas in hospital,” Chris said. He pointed to a group of young girls who were all lying flat on their backs on the ice. “See. People fall over.”

“People also glide beautifully on ice,” Daniel said. He pulled Chris in for a close hug and loved the feeling of Chris burying his face into Daniel’s neck and scarf. It didn’t matter that it was below freezing in Central Park; there was new snow on the ground, the skaters were laughing and happy and the lights reflecting off of the ice were stunning. Grabbing Chris’s hand, he pulled him down the path and to the kiosk to pay and get skates. He hesitated only briefly when Chris tugged back but the closer they got to actual skating, the more relaxed Chris seemed.

“You realize you have a really long way to fall when you’re as tall as a tree, Daniel Bailey,” Chris pointed out. He was tying his skates and checking the fit by waggling his foot. He looked so damn serious.

“Is that a height joke? Did you just make a height joke?” Daniel teased. He loved it when Chris smiled. In fact he loved it when Chris smiled, laughed, frowned, or indeed did anything that reflected in his gorgeous brown eyes.
I have it so bad
, he thought to himself.
I just want to be with Chris all the time
.

“Not at all, a height joke would be asking you what the weather was like up there.

Now that is a good height joke.” Chris pushed himself to stand upright and held out his hands to balance himself on the matting. There was such a look of triumph in his expression when he remained upright that Daniel couldn’t hold back the laugh even if he tried.

“You look good there,” he said, then stepped as carefully as he could into Chris’s space. Stealing a kiss from snow-cold lips, he pulled back and guided Chris to the beginning of the ice. There was a small step up onto the vast expanse of slippery stuff.

Daniel waited as Chris stopped his forward movement.

“You’ve seen
Bambi
, right?” Chris said. He was uncertain and staring morosely down at the ice. “You know that scene when the rabbit—”

“Thumper.”

“Yeah, Thumper takes Bambi on the ice and he’s all legs and falling over?”

“It will be fine. I’ve got you.” Daniel stepped onto the rink and centered his balance so he had a firm stance. Then he held a hand out and took the unsteady weight of Chris out onto the ice. Chris glided forward a few inches and Daniel couldn’t believe the sheer terror in the other man’s eyes.