Next History: The Girl Who Hacked Tomorrow (33 page)

“Explain.”

“It is one simple word. Look it up.”

“Don’t stiff me, dude. Spill.”

“
Very well. When you feel gratitude, express it with clear intention, the entire being resonates. All the cells of body and mind. The organism becomes more balanced. A being in a state of gratitude connects to all that is. A grateful mind stands at the threshold of sharing.”

Tharcia recalls things Clay has said to her, lessons learned from quieting his mind while he was in prison.

“You need to tell me what you want, Tharcia.”

She takes a deep breath,
relieved to be on known ground. “I did think of one thing. Make people stop hurting each other. But I need to think on that for a while, there’s more I want to ask for. And I need to take a shower, eat, and change clothes.”

“Okay, done. You now have a passenger. You can
come and go anytime you like.”

“Passenger?”

“One of my associates, to look out for you and make sure you don’t try anything weird.” Lian smirks. “Weird-er. Think of him as a pager. Name’s Vardøger.”

“Where the hell would I go?”

“Exactly.”

According to ancient rules, a supernatural being while held captive in a pentagram will never let a petitioner out of its sight until the bargain is sealed. Lian bent this rule when Lylit informed him she was taking Tharcia out for some needed girl-talk. Tharcia’s first words when she becomes oriented to their new surroundings are few and to the point.

“Lylit, I am really, really, really pissed at you.”

Not far south of Santa Cruz, Lylit, as Lillian in the Cynthia Mullen avatar, walks with Tharcia along the sands of Rio Del Mar beach. People with dogs walk briskly this cool sunlit morning. Near the shore, dolphins swim. To their north along the coast a sunken concrete barge awash in surf stinks with decades of seal and bird droppings. Shortly after Lillian and Tharcia arrive, the sea breeze swerves north. It now blows the stench away.

“Call me Lillian. Tharcia, can you tell me more about that?” The face that regards her is soft, full-lipped, framed in
dark hair. Tharcia firmly tries to avoid looking too long. Stoplight of her heart is green. If things weren’t so weird, if she were not so angry, she would like to kiss this woman’s mouth. Hard and for a long time. She has been feeling ravenously itchy in that direction since she got out of bed. When, three days ago? She’s certain Lian could not be more mistaken about her liking for girls.

Sparkling w
aves crash, Tharcia ignores them. “You used me! I had a perfectly innocent thing going, to contact my mom. It would not have worked. Lian says so, Father Tilton and Althea too. I would have gone on to something else. But you perverted it into this huge production number that is totally about to fuck me. And the world with it! I now have to make this bargain that will end when I go to hell with your goddamned boyfriend!”

Lillian
stops, puts a hand on Tharcia’s arm. The dark eyes are warm. “Thank you for telling me. You’re right, I have changed the outcome. But it really started long ago, before you were born. Look, suppose you turn it into a bet?”

Tharcia twists away and walks faster.
“Don’t change the subject! All this chaos out there now is because of you.”

“Hear me out. Th
ere is a way to fix it. You have to do the bargain with Lian, this for that, quid pro quo. But what if you couch it all in a wager? If you win, Lian pays all the consequences. You get your life back.”

“A bet? Oh fat chance I’d win against
some supreme angel.” Tharcia’s voice is flat.

“Cheer up
, Tharcia. I’m in this with you, but I have many things to keep in balance. I do want to be with him, we were created to be together. Now we are, thanks to you. It’s a luxurious feeling. You brought him here. I owe you for that.”

Tharcia looks at Lillian solemnly. “I thought you were safe when you were my second soul.”

“I was. I am so grateful, it cannot be expressed. But I had to stay completely quiet. I wanted to be out! In the world, like you. Lian’s arrival made that possible.”

“Ah.”

“So look. Everyone who makes a bargain with Lian wants something for themselves. Purely. Most of them are male. You thought of the whales, then the animals, then every living thing. You asked for people to become responsible. That is healthy. If you want people to be responsible, why not leave it to them to decide?”

“Everyone?”

“Sure. Like a vote.”

“
Like, ballots and stuff?”

“Ah! You have come upon something that is in my court exactly.”

“What?”

“Dreams.”

“I hope that’s what this is so I can wake the fuck up.”

“Don’t lose hope, Tharcia. I happen to be
quite adept with dreams,” Lylit says proudly. “I invented them.”

“
You invented dreaming?”

“At first it was a fuzzy plan. My intention was to help the mind expand. It needed to
reach outside the brain. Dreams are a way for mortals to work out ego needs in a safe way. Oh, right away the patriarchy spread rumors and lies that I invented the dream state so I could fornicate with men while they slept. Pooh. Those people are so unpleasant.”

“
You sure didn’t invent my dreams.”

“I am not joking,” Lillian, Lylit, says with a broad smile. “Sometimes dreams are too convincing, I will admit.”

“Like our garden dream? Was that you? And who was that angel?”

“It was
me, and that was no dream. Hear me out. There’s something in it for you. I invented dreaming for mortals to play out their wildest fantasies during sleep, as a way to grow the imagination and help people find new ideas, new facts, invent new art. I made the dream state for access to the free mind. Higher goals and deep instinctual drives all firing at once. All of it is useful, even the fearsome things people think of.

“Sure
, the old graybeards said it was to help Lian work on them. Creation myths are inaccurate because language is incomplete at those times. Dreaming is a way people access all the old memories and futures, the mind of the Creator.”

“Mind of the Creator?”

“Yes. There’s something called the Book of Life, the Book of God's Remembrance, Book of Decree. Another name for it is Akasha.”

Tharcia
cocks her head.
Lian mentioned Aksaha.

“Dreams are my playground.
Look, why does nature put you to sleep, completely immobilize your body, make your sex organs ready, then give you a series of wild hallucinations about which you can do nothing?”

Tharcia gives Lylit a sharp look.
“Hold up. Why make people feel hot during dreams?”

Lylit
’s eyes dance. “Hah. Dreaming is so people would make babies. Dreams are for the survival of the species. That was my gift.”

Tharcia’s eyes soften. “Well thank
s, I think.”

Lylit beams.
“Sis, it’s something I give you as well. Something you can use.”

“
Use dreams? How?”

Ahead
, their attention is drawn to a couple that had walked past holding hands, and who now stand kissing passionately. It is a cold day and they are warmly dressed. Pulling at clothing, both fall to their knees in the sand. The man moves behind the woman and lowers her jeans. Directly in front of the row of broad-windowed beach homes, two bodies move into the ancient rhythm. People walking their dogs pause to look, but keep going. Lillian smiles at the sight. It’s almost commonplace now. Mothers don’t take their kids in public so much anymore. The police won’t respond, even if someone bothers to call, not for that. There are more pressing matters.

“Gross,” Tharcia says, turning away.

Lillian smiles. “Something you should know about that, about what those people are doing.”

“About everybody
going all spinny over sex?” Tharcia for her part is more than spinny herself. She’d like to kiss this Lillian, if she weren’t so pissed at the betrayal. She’d like to kiss
someone
.

Lillian takes her hand as they walk along.
“The Akasha works in another way. It is the field of all possibilities, a pregnant space. Spirit beings manipulate that field to manifest reality. Mortals are learning how. It’s behind all the strange things happening to some people. They are projecting their fears and desires as reality.”

“Manifesting reality? Like,
believing something so it comes true? Keeping a positive attitude?”

“
Close. Although a positive attitude would help you, Sis, quite a lot. If you keep something firmly in mind, a goal, the universe of possible realities responds. It doesn’t always come out exactly as you think, but people already affect future reality.”

“
What you said about the Book of Life reminds me of a dream I had. I was a whale and I knew everything. Everything past and future.”

“Tell me?”

Tharcia describes her whale dream, the pink ribbon in infinite dark, the blinding flashes as each whale was absorbed into it. Her sensation of becoming one with all of time, one with the knowledge of everything. When she finishes, Lillian wears a pleased expression.

“
I love you Tharcia. That was more real than you think. So much more.”

“But I forgot everything,” Tharcia says sadly. “All of it.”

Lillian laughs. “You are mistaken about that. You are the holder of that knowledge. You will pass it on.”

“Pass it on? I don’t even know it
.”

“Knowledge is sometimes communicated across great distances.”

“Who to?”

“Someone who needs it. Not necessarily on Earth.
You’ll know when the time comes. Humans are more powerful than you realize.”

“School me.”

“Alright. Ever wonder why attempts to contact other civilizations in space haven’t worked?”

“I heard some stuff. TV program
s.”

“
On Earth, you have been trying for decades with zero results. There is a fundamental reason. You can’t contact other sentient races in the galaxy, because they experience the world differently than you do. They are out there, but in completely different realities.”

“Mm
?”

“Yes. Every consciousness experiences the universe d
ifferently. Reality is uniquely personal, because each mind creates it. Like being tuned to a different program. You are evolving. Someday you’ll hear them. You received the whale knowledge, Tharcia. One day you’ll pass it on, and they will hear you.”

“Pass it to who?”

“Tharcia, no one knows you humans are here. Because you’re not ready. Earth has been silent and invisible to other civilizations.”

Tharcia looks doubtful.
“But you were telling me about the bargain with Lian. You said use dreams to vote? How?”

“Simple. Did your mother ever sing you a lullaby?”

“Huh? Leave my mother out of this.”

Lylit laughs easi
ly. “This whole thing is about our mother! Maybe you should pretend it’s all a dream, be playful and let it develop as it will. It would be more fun for you.”

“
It’s too damn real!”

“How do you know what is real from what is not?
You’ve had dreams you knew were real. I know you have, because I was there for many of yours.”

“Voyeur
! Peeper! I really hate that you were in there all that time. Pervo.”

“That hurts, Tharcia.
Both of us were completely helpless. We were born together and we were going to die together. This is a first for me. I’ve never spent time as a human soul. If you hadn’t started looking for your mom...” Lillian, Lylit, wants to tell Tharcia what it was like, to experience birth as a human, to be with her as an infant, a child, a little girl, as part of the woman Tharcia is now becoming. Tharcia says nothing, plops down on the sand, stares at the horizon with her lower lip pushed out.

Lillian
chuckles to see the little-girl pout. “Go ahead and be mad. But I’m finding a way to help you.”

“Not interested. You are a freak.”

Lillian sits near Tharcia, lightly strokes her cheek. The girl with hair of winter white stares ahead, saying not a word.

“Tharcia, dear Tharcia. You have to see. We have no control, these things happen outside of us
. You and I are caught in a tide. Lian exists because the Creator wants humans to have knowledge of good and evil. Dreams exist to help the mind evolve. We can use those things. Don’t stay mad at me too long. We are going back now.”

“
Alan, the girl is back! She brought a friend.”

“No shit Sherlock. So who’s the looker?” Incursion Observation
Security Lead Alan Jackson, after forty straight hours in the trailer, is running on empty. His mind occasionally wanders off on entertaining side-trips. Looking at the women and the Adonis figure on his monitors, Jackson randomly wonders if there’s a three-way on tap. Badly in need of sleep, decent food, and a shower, he would prefer to intersperse each of those events with wild random sex. Eyeballing the full-bodied brunette, Jackson, a practicing Methodist, realizes he’s also practicing being horny. He is worried too. He has not been in contact with his wife since yesterday.