Night Games (27 page)

“But hey, I can see that telling me about your childhood will start your day right, so I'm all ears.” She tried to grin, but it didn't quite work.

He looked startled. “You really want to hear about it?”

She didn't try for casual this time. “I want to hear about
all
of your life, so your childhood is a good place to begin.” Ally's intensity surprised even her.

This could be a huge mistake. The more she learned about him, the more she'd have to remember once he'd gone. And sometimes more wasn't better.

“Why?” His tone suggested he couldn't care less about her answer.

Ally gazed at the horse's ears, searching for the perfect lie. “It's part of the 2002 dating ritual. Telling a partner about your life gives a sense of intimacy, a feeling that you know each other, care about each other. It's part of the foreplay.” What a bunch of garbage.

Brian shrugged away her comment, as he probably shrugged away so much in his life that he didn't want to hear.

“I don't remember much before I was six years old. When I was six, my mother left me in a spaceport. She told me she'd be back and to be a good boy. She never came back, and I was never a good boy. Guess we were both batting zero.”
His voice sounded neutral, as though he were telling someone else's story.

Ally didn't believe that voice. She glanced at his face, but he'd turned away to watch some sheep grazing by the side of the road.

“How did you survive?” Ally leaned against him, as if bodily contact could ease the pain of the boy he'd once been.

He didn't move away from her. “There're lots of things a six-year-old can do to live on the outer planets. Social programs are pretty much nonexistent, so it's every kid for himself. I learned to steal and carry messages that an adult couldn't carry safely.”

He paused, and for a moment she thought he wouldn't continue.

Six years old.
Ally couldn't imagine a six-year-old on his own. At six, she'd felt safe, cherished. Her most traumatic moment had been her first public appearance. She'd been a celery stalk in her class play.

“There were other . . . services I could perform.”

She had no words to describe her emotions. Her churning stomach, her
rage
, were enough.

He scowled, and she had the feeling he hadn't meant to tell her this much. She wasn't sure she could
take
this much. But if he thought he'd drive her away with the horror of his childhood, he didn't know Ally O'Neill.

Brian glanced away from her. “I did what I needed to do to survive.”

Ally didn't care whether he wanted her touch
or not; she put her hand on his thigh and squeezed. “If this is supposed to send me screaming into the night, it isn't working. I just wish I could reach through time and strangle the bastards who'd prey on a small child.”

She felt the tension leave him as he placed his hand over hers. His soft laughter washed over her, leaving her feeling warm inside.

“I guess I never thought it would scare you away.” He rubbed a circular pattern with the pad of his thumb on the back of her hand. “I was
hoping
it wouldn't because Cap was right about something. You get to me, babe.”

His admission hung between them, a connection Brian didn't need, but wanted more than anything he'd wanted in a long time.

He sensed her sigh, felt her fingers pushing into his thigh, massaging the tight muscles. Amazing. No matter what part of his body she touched, she always touched
him
. Brian had always thought he knew who he was, but the part of him Ally touched was a stranger.

“Then you don't believe I'm plotting with Cap?” She slanted a small smile his way.

Brian shook his head. “When Jupe first told me what he'd heard, I lost my temper and jumped to conclusions.” He gazed at the passing rock walls, and green checkerboard fields relieved by yellow-flowered gorse stretching into the distance. “I don't know why it made me so mad.”

She didn't follow up on his comment. “How did you get started in your career?”

He grinned. “I picked Jupe's pocket while he was waiting at the spaceport. He caught me, but didn't press charges after I agreed to listen to his proposal. He'd been scouting the outer planets looking for men he thought had the right look, attitude, and sex drive to make it big in the games. Jupe's always been a great judge of talent.” His grin faded. “I owe him a lot. I was sixteen when he caught me, and I trained for two years, then went pro. I never looked back. I've been in the league for twelve years.”

“So how do you spend all your wealth?” She tightened her fingers on the reins and stared fixedly between the horse's ears. “I asked you once before, but you didn't give me a straight answer. Guess you didn't trust me. Do you trust me enough now?”

She wanted his trust. Her body language shouted how important it was to her.

Suddenly, he relaxed. He'd tell her the truth. No one else besides Jupe knew what he did with his earnings, but he wanted Ally to know. “I support homeless kids all over the outer planets. Make sure they have places to live, enough to eat, education, and career choices.”

“Like
you
never did.”

She didn't sound teary, and he didn't hear any pity in her voice. Good thing. If he had, he would have joined Katy inside. He couldn't believe he'd told her about his kids, but the telling felt good. “Don't make me into a martyr. I'm at the highest level of my career. I'm a hero to
Monday Night
Sex
fans everywhere.” He hoped she'd smile because all this emotion was making him uncomfortable.

“You're a hero to me, too, Brian Byrne.” Her soft answer made his day. No, it made his lifetime.

Brian decided that no matter how spectacular space was, there were still places on Earth that could make you suck in your breath. The Cliffs of Moher had that effect. The caution sign they'd passed on the way in, warning of “very dangerous cliffs ahead,” was a classic understatement. And not one guardrail. He wondered how many people had taken a header off these cliffs.

He stood with Ally and Katy on the sandstone ledge where dozens of other tourists milled, staring down almost seven hundred feet to where the Atlantic dashed itself against the cliffs, sending jets of spray into the air. Wow was about the only comment that came to mind. He stepped back.

“I think we have company.”

Ally's comment shifted his gaze to where a small group of people and one calico cat were carefully making their way down to the path. It didn't take Nebula's green hair to identify them.

Great. Just great. He turned back to Ally. “They won't come over. They're just keeping track of me.” Brian had expected them to follow, but their presence still made him angry.

Katy peered over the edge of the cliff. “I don't hear any spirits, just a bunch of birds.” She
glared at Ally. “I know, I know. You told me there'd be birds. I don't see any of those merrows either. Can't write a book about nothing. I think I'll try another spot.” She started walking farther up the path.

Ally took a step closer to the edge even as Brian took a step back. Extreme heights made him . . . uneasy. Okay, so he was afraid of high places.

“Brian, maybe I'm seeing things, but it looks like there's a woman down there. Come and look.” Ally's voice was edged with excitement.

Brian knew his would be edged with fear. “I'll take your word for it.” He stared straight ahead, so he wouldn't be tempted to look down. For the first time since he'd arrived in Ireland, he was relieved to see the gray mist rolling in off the ocean. Within minutes, visibility would be gone and they'd return to the wagon.

“It's hard to see, but she doesn't look like she's in trouble. How did she get down there? It's too rough for a boat. She looks like . . .” Ally turned to Brian with widened eyes. “A merrow? I have to get Katy. If she misses this . . .” She turned back to scanning the cliff's base. “Darn. The mist is moving in, and I can't see now. Maybe I just imagined it. What should I do?”

Leaving came to mind. Brian knew his fear was irrational, but knowing didn't end it. The mist cloaked everything in shades of gray. It was like some mythic monster moving in from the sea, touching him with a cold, damp tongue. He shivered, afraid to move for fear he'd step off the
now invisible cliff and plunge into the abyss.
Get a grip.
He closed his eyes, blocking out the mist, gathering the shreds of his courage so he could drag Ally and Katy back to the wagon without their knowing he was scared witless.

He opened his eyes to the sound of Ally's surprised gasp.

And stared, horrified, as she teetered on the edge of the cliff. Ally flailed her arms wildly in an attempt to regain her balance. Useless. She would fall to her death.

He reacted. No time to think. Stepping to the cliff's edge, he grabbed the back of her jacket. But her forward motion caught him off guard. He hadn't had a chance to set his feet, and her weight yanked him off balance.

In a moment of clarity, he knew if he didn't let her go, he'd go over the edge with her.

He held on.

Suddenly, someone grasped him from behind and pulled. The backward yank was just enough to give him a chance to get his feet under him. With a last effort he didn't think he had in him, he jerked Ally back from the edge.

She fell into his arms, her legs barely supporting her, and just shook. His own legs felt like he'd returned to Earth after a month of space's weightlessness. Weak and shaky. He wrapped his arms around her and forced himself not to crush her with his need to keep her safe. He took several long, calming breaths.

Then he turned to thank the person who'd
grabbed him. He stared into the eyes of the woman he'd seen at the keep. Claudia? She looked as shaken as he felt.

“Thanks. We'd be lying at the bottom of the cliff by now if you hadn't grabbed me.” He smoothed his hand over Ally's hair, felt her shaking ease.

“I'm glad I was standing close enough. Another few feet in this mist and I wouldn't have seen what was happening.” Claudia focused her attention on him, never once glancing at Ally. “I couldn't let you go over.”

Brian frowned. Why did he feel Claudia's message was for him alone? He abandoned that thought as Ally drew a deep breath and stepped away from him.

“What can I say? Thanks, Claudia.” Ally didn't glance toward the cliff's edge. “I think I've seen all I ever want to see of the Cliffs of Moher.”

Katy materialized out of the mist. “Didn't see a darn thing. Maybe Ireland doesn't have any fairies or ghosts. I sure wish something exciting would happen. Did you guys see anything?”

My life flash in front of me?
No, Brian now knew that in the moment before death there were no thoughts, just the frantic effort to stay alive. He glanced at Ally, saw her shake her head. He took his cue from her. “Nothing to see, Katy.”

“Hmmph. I'll meet you in the wagon. May as well take a nap so I'll be fresh for tonight. Maybe those tortured spirits buried under the keep will make up for this.” She disappeared into the mist.

Brian glanced around. Claudia had left, and the others were nowhere in sight. In the distance, he could hear the faint echo of voices, but within their gray cocoon he and Ally could well be the only people on Earth.

“Thanks for not telling Katy what happened.” Her voice seemed disembodied, as though she were speaking outside herself. “How could I explain that the cliffs almost gained two more spirits, that the next time she visited this spot she'd definitely hear ghostly shrieks? Mine.”

Brian knew she expected him to laugh. He didn't.

Ally leveled a stare at him, searching, emotionless. Brian sensed the emotionless part was simply an attempt to hold reaction at bay.

“Why didn't you let go, Brian? If Claudia hadn't grabbed you, you would've gone over with me.” Her gaze never wavered from his face.

Because in that instant where thought ended and inner truth began, I knew I couldn't lose you.
What did that mean? He couldn't explain something to her that he didn't understand himself.

So he gave her another reason, one he'd just realized. “Redemption comes at unexpected moments. I told you that I broke a promise once, but I never told you the promise.” He could close his eyes and pull up the scene with Landis as though it were yesterday. Funny how the really ugly moments in life stuck with you. “I was sixteen. It was right before Jupe found me. Landis was one of the guys I ran with. We were just a
gang of petty thugs, but we'd vowed to take care of each other. He'd climbed a bilectron power pole to try to reach the window of a gem distribution center, a place where precious stones from across the galaxy are kept in controlled conditions until dealers order them.”

“You don't have to tell me this, Brian.” Her voice had softened, grown warmer.

“I want to.” It was that simple. He wanted her to understand. “I didn't go up with him because . . . I'm afraid of heights.” He glanced at her to make sure she wasn't laughing.

She studied him, unsmiling, not judging, just letting him speak.

“He'd almost reached the top when something snagged him, and he couldn't get loose.” The telling got harder now. “He called down for me to climb up and help him.” Brian gazed into the mist, seeing the pole, feeling his fear. “I yelled for him to relax because I'd be up to get him. I stood at the bottom of that pole, tried to step up, and froze. I was so afraid I thought I'd throw up. Maybe I would've eventually gone up to him, but in the end I didn't have to.”

He knew his voice had turned bitter, rank with all his old self-loathing. “In some faraway power station, someone pressed a button.” His breathing caught with the remembered horror. “The force of the energy bolt threw Landis from the pole. He was dead before he hit the ground.” Brian exhaled on a long breath of old pain. “I
broke my promise to Landis, but I never broke another one.”