Night Visions (Night Series) (5 page)

After what seemed like an eternity, Sam eased back. Not wanting to break contact with him, but feeling embarrassed for soaking his shirt with her tears. She dropped her eyes as heat crept up her tear stained cheeks. She could only imagine what she must look like. Eyes and nose red and swollen. Thank God for waterproof mascara. When she imagined a reunion, she always saw herself as poised and in control. Not the love-struck, eighteen year-old girl he left behind.

Silently
, she cursed Ginger for breaking the tenuous thread that held her together. She gave her the
we'll-talk-later
look. Ginger continued licking her paw, unfazed by Sam's death stare.

Sam narrowed her eyes on one very innocent looking
Ginger.
We'll see how pleased she is when she's sleeping on the cold, hard floor tonight.

Feeling self-conscious, Sam turned away. Focusing her attention on the slow moving ripples in the lake. The silence dragged on, each second deepening the ache in her heart. She wished Ian would say something. Anything to ease the awkward tension building between them. What was going through his mind? Regret? Had he hoped she wasn't home? That he would have been able to avoid her? Was he just being polite? Sam needed to get this over. To finally close this chapter on her life.

“Why are you here, Ian?” she finally asked, not meeting his gaze.

He stepped in front of her so she was forced to look in his eyes. “I came for you,” he said softly. He reached out as if to touch her, then let his arm fall.

“You came for me? After all these years?” It made no sense. None of it did. Yet, a glimmer of hope sparked inside her. Hopefully he didn't notice. She didn't want him to notice. Didn't want him to see that he still affected her the same way he always had. Like the first time she met him, fifteen years ago. When he found her huddled on the dock, cradling her injured knee. He lifted her in his arms, holding her close. The pain in her leg forgotten as she looked into his hazel eyes. Even as a boy of eleven he found the need to protect her. If he was back to mess with her mind again, she wouldn't survive. "Why?"

Ian stood in silence, fisting his hands at his side. He'd been quiet for so long, she didn't think he would answer.
Pensively he said, “I need to explain to you why I left and it's not something that I can do here.”

She stared at him, waiting for him to continue.

“Jason sent me."

"Jason? What do you mean Jason?"
she asked. He had stayed in touch with Jason all these years and her brother had never said a word to her? Her chest tightened. Vibrations rolled through her head.

"That's why I'm here. Jason asked me to come and get you."

The admission had nausea coiling in her stomach. She shook her head, doing her best to form words. "I don't understand."

Regret flashed in his eyes once more. He reached for her again, but when she tried to back away, he didn't hesitate from clasping her hands. "Listen to me. I know we have a lot to discuss, but I can't explain it all now. So let's stick to the facts. Jason needs you. I volunteered to come get you. Now I need you to come with me. To Montana.” He waited, as if gauging her reaction to the madness spilling from his mouth. Had he lost his mind or did he honestly think she'd buy this load of crap?

“Is that where Jason is? In Montana? He's supposed to be in Germany." Jason wouldn't come back to the States. Not without contacting her. Granted they had busy lives, but it never stopped him from calling her before. Besides, he wouldn't send Ian here. Not without warning her first. But why would Jason stay in touch with him, knowing how much Ian had hurt her?

"Why is he in Montana?
And why are we driving? Isn't it faster to fly?"

“
Jason was visiting Trent and me. As far as flying you'd have to ask your brother. He's the one who insisted we drive,” Ian replied.

“I
can't believe this,” she said, pulling her hands from his. How could she trust what he was saying? Even if it was true, the thought of spending time with him again made her stomach flip. They'd be in the car for hours, alone. Would probably have to spend the night in a hotel. She hoped this wasn't her brother's attempt at playing matchmaker.

No. This was too soon. A lot had changed in six years. She wasn't the same trusti
ng person he knew back then. No way would she allow Ian to hurt her again.

“Why should I go anywhere with you?" Sam's voice cracked. "You were my best friend and you snuck away in the night. I deserved a goodbye. I deserved a reason.”

Ian flinched, as if her words slapped him.

“Why, Ian?" She pressed. "You could have called. Sent a letter.
An email. Anything."

I would have gone with you.

He took her hand again, guiding her to his porch. It seemed like only yesterday that they sat here planning which colleges they would apply to. He gently pulled her down on the step next to him. She could tell he struggled to put the right words together. Unsure of how to begin.

Was there someone else in his life? Was he married? Did he have kids? She didn't see a ring, but that didn't mean anything. What if there was someone else? Would she be able to handle seeing him with another woman?

“Sammie… The day we kissed. I came alive for the first time.” Still holding her hand, he threaded his fingers with hers. “The last thing that I wanted to do was leave you. I'm sorry that I left without saying goodbye. I know how much that must have hurt you. But I had no choice."

Sam couldn't deny the sorrow shadowing his eyes. The need to offer him comfort built inside her. Her pride kept her from telling him a part of her died inside that night. She couldn't
eat or sleep for months. She would have risked everything, even her own life, to be with him.

"I couldn't tell you the truth at the time. Not only wouldn't you have believed me, but it was the only way to keep you safe. I could
n't risk losing you. I had to leave.”

“Keep me safe. What are you talking about?” she asked
, incredulous. What the hell was going on? Did this have anything to do with her stalker in the woods? No. It couldn't. That was recent. Ian left years ago.

The pressure began to build in her head again. At first a dull throb, ricocheting around her head until the pain nearly blinded her. Jerking her hand out of his grasp, she rubbed her temples, squeezing her eyes shut. She let out a moan, choking back the bile in her throat.

“Sam, look at me.” Ian said firmly, concern lacing his voice. When she didn't respond he pulled her hands away, replacing them with his own. She wrapped her fingers around his arms, squeezing as the pulsing in her head increased.

“Look at me, Sammie. Focus on my eyes.” His voice grew softer, his breath warm on her face. She grimaced as she opened her eyes. Her breath left her lungs in strained gasps.

“Think back to that day on the dock. You can hear the water lapping against it and the birds overhead.”

He brushed his thumbs over her cheeks
, absorbing the tears that trickled down.

“You're laughing at one of my stupid jokes.” Her hold on his arms relaxed. “I'm tucking your hair behind your ear and you lean your cheek into my hand. Then you let out this sigh of contentment as your eyes drift closed. Like there was no other place that you would rather be. That was my undoing. That one sigh broke down all of my defenses. When my lips touched yours, everything else stopped. Nothing existed except me and you.”

The pain left as quickly as it had arrived. All she felt was the heat from Ian's hands as he caressed her face. He leaned in, kissing her lightly on the forehead.

“Better?” he asked, his breath tickling her cheek.

She nodded as warmth flooded her body from his touch. How could she still feel this way for him? How could she want more? What spell had he cast over her heart?

“Please trust me, Sammie. I'll explain everything when we get there,” he softly pleaded.

Sam paused for a moment, searching for a reason not to go. Edits to finish. Dinner with Scott. Scott! How could she forget about Scott? He had been her rock, her confidante. She couldn't just leave without telling him. With everything going on, he would send a search party out for her.

How could Ian expect her to jump in the car and travel cross-country? Why? Because Jason needed her?
He could have just called her. She would have got on a plane. She didn't need an escort.

Could she really trust Ian?

Looking into his eyes, she saw something there. Was it longing? She sighed, hating it but knowing she would follow him to the ends of the earth if he asked her.

“Let me go pack a bag. I'll be back in a sec.”

Ian's shoulders relaxed. A hint of a smile teased the corners of his mouth. Sam pushed herself off his porch. She crossed the yard to her house, afraid to look back and discover it was all a dream. Ian had come back home. For her. Could she give him a second chance if he asked for one?

* * *

Ian's eyes trailed after Sam as she walked into her house. Her knit pants hugged her trim waist, showing off curves he remembered vividly. Even after all this time. As the ache to touch them increased, he wiped his damp palms on his jeans, doing his best to control the urge to follow her. An urge that consumed his every waking moment.

Damn
, it felt good to hold her again. To breathe in the subtle vanilla scent that reminded him of home. Of happiness. Of her.

Some things never changed. Not even she had, though she tried to pretend otherwise. He couldn't blame her for doing so. She had every right to be angry. Had the right to question his motives for showing up here, unannounced, expecting her to take off with him across the country. For what? Her brother. He should have known better than to use that excuse. Hated using it to help him get his foot in the door, but he didn't have any other choice. Had he told he
r the other reason he came here, she'd never believe it. Not after the way he left her…

The thought tore at his soul. To know he was the cause of her pain. He'd imagined the look on her face when she realized he'd left. As masochistic as it was, he deserved every ounce of anguish it caused him. At least the pain reminded him that he was real. That what they had was real.

If he could have done things differently, he would have. Not that she would accept that excuse. How could she when she didn't have the details about… Now he had to hope that she would trust him again.

Casting his gaze toward the Range Rover, he questioned how
many times he had climbed behind the wheel, fighting the desires that were pulling him towards her. Six long years of wishing she were with him, hating the distance between them. He would make sure that never happened again. He would keep her close until he breathed his last breath.

* * *

Sam brushed her back against the front door when it shut, letting the unshed tears finally fall. She cursed herself for crying. Even more so for allowing Ian to persuade her into making this trip.

What hold does he have over me that I'll welcome
him back into my life so easily?

Blinded by tears, she climbed the stairs to her bedroom. A short trip down the hall brought her to her room. She swiped at her face, forcing the confusion from her mind. If Jason really did need her, she couldn't afford to waste any time crying over someone who didn't deserve her tears. She'd survive the trip with Ian. Every mile they drove, she'd focus on the hurt his leaving caused. Painful or not, the reminder would help her keep up her guard.

Within seconds, she had the bed covered with clothes. She jammed in as many as her duffle bag would hold, then crammed her laptop and cell charger into the computer bag. She'd call Scott on the way and explain about her last minute travel plans.

Until he started asking a million questions. What could she possibly tell him about Ian?

Oh hey, Scott. Sorry I can't make dinner, but the love of my life has returned and needs me to go home with him to help my brother.

She could only imagine Scott's reaction to that. He knew Ian's departure had sent her into a downward spiral. Had taken the time to chisel the ice away from her heart. She loved him for that. Cherished every second they built their friendship
on, but Ian claimed her heart and soul. Regardless of how much time had passed, the kiss she and Ian shared connected her to him. Everything in her body wouldn't let her deny it, even if she couldn't explain it. That one, special moment enhanced her life. Like she was seeing the world for the first time.

Before she could lose herself in the memory, doubt began to surface. Would leaving with Ian be the biggest mistake of her life? Where had he been? For all she knew
, he could have been in jail.

A storm raged inside her.

Clasping the phone in her hand, she dialed Jason's number, praying he would be free to pick up. He might not, considering the time difference in Germany. But she had to try. Had to know if he actually needed her or if Ian had come back for a different reason.

Jason's voice filled her ears, instructing her to leave a message. Guess it wouldn't hurt to do just that. He'd call her back as soon as he got it.