No One But You (3 page)

“I think it's time you headed back to the house,” Salty said after he'd explained a cattle drive in as much detail as he could provide. “If you want to know more about cows, ask Monty when he comes in. Hen can tell you everything you want to know about fighting Indians and rustlers. They're George's twin brothers. I'm just a cowhand who likes working around the ranch.”

He was sorry if that disappointed Ellen, but he never wanted to have to defend his ranch against Indians or rustlers. He didn't have to worry about that because he didn't have a ranch. Or the prospect of getting one. He didn't even have enough money to buy a pitifully small farm. He would probably end up working for George Randolph for the rest of his life.

* * *

“Now that my wife has satisfied her curiosity,” George said to Sarah when she'd finished recounting her journey, “would you like to tell us what prompted you to undertake such a long trip? Am I right in assuming you meant to arrive here, that we're not merely a stop on a longer journey?”

Sarah had known this moment was coming. She had prepared what she was going to say, but she hadn't expected to meet a couple like George and Rose Randolph. She'd been invited into their home, had her comfort and that of her children made a priority. She didn't have to be told to know they would take a personal interest in her story.

“That's rather awkward to explain, and a little embarrassing.”

“Then don't explain.”

“I have to, or you won't understand why I need your help.” She picked at an imaginary string on her dress. “I live on a large ranch I inherited from my father. My husband didn't come home from the war. I've hired several men over the last six years, but that hasn't worked out. I don't even know the size of my herd because they never had time to count them. Now I can't afford to pay anyone enough to work for us. If something isn't done soon, I'll lose the ranch.” She paused. Once she uttered the next sentence, she could never take the words back. “My only alternative now is to marry again. A husband won't require the wages I can no longer afford to pay.”

“Are you sure you have to do this?” Rose asked. “Don't you have family you could turn to?”

More embarrassment. It wasn't her fault Roger's family had abandoned her, but it felt like it. “My parents are dead, and Roger's family has turned their backs on us.” She refused to embarrass Jared by disclosing that he was the reason for the estrangement.

“I would have thought you'd have had better luck finding a suitable husband in Austin,” George said. “There are only a few single men working on ranches this far from town.”

Sarah wanted to avert her gaze, turn away, leave the room, but she had come this far. There was no point in losing courage now. “I interviewed quite a few men for the job without letting them know that I had something more in mind. I stayed in Austin for nearly a week without finding a man I felt I could accept as a husband.”

“It's not as simple as that, is it?” George asked. “You want someone who can help bind the family together.”

“That's right.” Sarah was immensely relieved that George understood. “I need someone who can help me make Ellen believe she might be happier growing up as a young woman than the son she thinks I need her to be. I'm more guilty than anyone else because I've depended on her so much.” She turned to Jared. “And I need someone who can understand that Jared is a wonderful boy even though he can't do the things most boys can.”

“That's what Rose did for my family,” George said. “We wouldn't be here without her.”

“Yes, you would,” Rose contradicted. “Probably still fighting, wearing dirty clothes, and choking down Tyler's cooking, but you'd still be here.”

Sarah wondered if it would ever be possible for a man to look at her the way George looked at Rose. She could cook, clean, wash, mend, and sew. She could work in the fields, put up food for the winter, dress meat, and make sausage. She could dance, sing a little, and carry on a conversation if it didn't wander too far from ordinary life. She believed she was capable of satisfying a man's physical appetites. Surely no man could expect more.

“Go on,” George encouraged. “I didn't mean to interrupt you.”

Sarah jerked her thoughts away from the impossible. “When I asked if there were any other men I might interview, I was told you employed the most capable and dependable men in the area. So that's why I'm here, to ask if you will help me convince your most capable and dependable man to marry me.”

“Why should I do that?” George asked.

“You have no reason at all,” Sarah said.

“Yes, we do,” Rose said. “You need help, and we can give it to you.”

“How?” George asked. “We don't have anyone who fits her requirements.”

“We have the perfect man.” Rose flashed a very satisfied smile and announced, “Salty. If you choose him, nothing will go wrong.”

Sarah hoped her face didn't show her surprise. She'd found him attractive, but she didn't want a man she found appealing. That wasn't supposed to be part of the bargain. She didn't want any emotional attachment while they were married…or any emotional entanglement to deal with when she divorced him. Divorce wasn't common, and divorced women were often looked upon with a jaundiced eye, but Sarah was willing to take that risk rather than find herself and her children bound to a second husband like her first.

“I had someone older in mind, someone who'll be willing to commit to at least five years,” Sarah said. “Salty is young enough to want to marry and start his own family.”

“Salty's twenty-seven,” George said. “There's only one older on the ranch. All the men who work for me were soldiers during the war.”

She didn't want a soldier, either. The two she'd hired had been bitter, cynical, and given to drinking up their small wages. Worse than that, they'd had no understanding of Jared's handicap. They acted like he was faking. Their scoffing had driven him to a dangerous attempt to saddle a horse. He'd fallen in the corral, unable to get up. It was a miracle he hadn't been stepped on or kicked. She'd fired both men immediately, but the real damage had been done to Jared's self-esteem. How could he respect himself as a man when he couldn't saddle or ride a horse, something his sister did every day?

“I admit I barely know Salty,” Sarah said, “but I don't think he's the kind of man to be interested in taking such a job.”

“Why not?” Rose asked.

What to say? No one knew she didn't want to be married again. She'd been forced to marry Roger who'd mistreated her, turned his back on his son, then deserted his family. The physical side of their marriage had been a painful and humiliating experience she never wanted to repeat. The men in her life, from her father through to the men who'd worked for her, had been hard and unemotional with no respect for women beyond the creature comforts they could provide and no interest in children beyond the free labor they supplied.

Salty was different. He didn't have the age and experience necessary and didn't appear to have the gravity she preferred, but he had been respectful to her and kind to the children. A man like that would be dangerous. She might come to like him, to hope he wouldn't leave.

“I can't give you a concrete reason,” Sarah said. “It's just the feeling I got.”

“I think we ought to ask Salty,” Rose said.

“Ask me what?”

Flushing with embarrassment, Sarah turned to see Salty standing in the archway.

“Mrs. Winborne is looking for someone to help her on her ranch,” Rose explained. “I told her you were the perfect man for the job.”

“Why me?” Salty asked, turning to George. “Are you dissatisfied with my work?”

“Of course not,” George said. “I'd hate to see you leave, but I wouldn't want to do anything that would stand in your way.”

“Stand in the way of what?”

“Mrs. Winborne's offer is a little out of the ordinary,” Rose said. “I'll let her explain it. George, why don't you take Jared into the kitchen? I made gingerbread, which he might like. Then you can round up Zac and Tyler to help me with dinner.”

Salty would have been happy to look for George's two youngest brothers himself, but it looked like there was no way out of this interview. He didn't know whether it would be kinder to tell Mrs. Winborne right away that he wasn't interested in leaving the Circle Seven, or allow her to explain her offer and then turn her down.

“I can tell you're uncomfortable with being put on the spot,” Sarah said.

“A little,” Salty agreed.

“I am, too, because I don't think you're quite what I'm looking for.”

Salty had been prepared to say just that, but hearing the words coming from someone else affected him quite differently. Much to his surprise, he found himself saying, “Maybe not, but why don't you explain your proposal? I might be able to offer some suggestions.”

What was he talking about? He knew nothing about this woman and her situation. Still, he entered the parlor and sat down in a straight back chair at a safe distance. He had a weakness for people in trouble, but he didn't want that to get him tangled up with Sarah and her brood.

“I own one of the largest ranches in Caldwell County,” Sarah began. “My husband didn't come home from the war, and it's too big for me and the children to operate alone.”

That was a familiar story, but most women in Sarah's position would have married again or sought refuge with family. He wondered why she hadn't.

“I've hired a succession of men to help with the ranch, but they never worked out for a variety of reasons.”

“Why?” Knowing the problems she'd encountered might help him find a logical reason for turning her down.

“Some didn't want to work hard. Others were rude or rough with the children.” She averted her gaze. “Some appeared to be more interested in me than in their work.”

He had no trouble believing that. She was a very attractive woman. Any man working on a secluded ranch and seeing no other woman for weeks on end could be forgiven for becoming more than interested in her.

“Couldn't you find anyone in Austin to work for you?”

Sarah kept her gaze averted. “I'm not in a position to pay a wage that would induce anyone to work for me.”

“Have you offered to let the men share some of the profits?”

“There haven't been any profits to share. Unless the situation improves, I'm going to lose the ranch. The bank president has done everything he can to hold off, but he can't much longer.”

“Maybe it's time to ask your family for help.”

Sarah's gaze locked with his. “My husband's family will only help if I put Jared in an institution. If you've ever seen one of those places, you know why I could never do that.”

Salty did know, but he also knew what it was like to have to deal with a handicapped person day after day. “So what do you propose to do?”

Sarah glanced away before turning back to Salty. He could practically see her gather her courage. That stiffness in her jaw returned. She sat up straighter, her back firm, her head up. “I'm proposing that the man marry me.”

If she was willing to remarry, why hadn't she done so before now? From the look in her eye, the thought either frightened her or was repugnant. He felt sorry for any woman forced to barter herself in this fashion, but he couldn't think of a better inducement for a man to take on the responsibility of a failing ranch. Knowing he would have such a woman in his bed at night would be more than enough incentive for hundreds of men. He didn't understand why she hadn't been able to find anyone to accept her offer.

“There are two conditions,” Sarah said. “First, the man will not share my bed.”

Salty's eyebrows rose. Now he understood why she didn't have any takers. Working like a farm horse all day and being denied the comfort of your legal wife's body at night would be enough to drive a lot of men to do something drastic.

“Sorry, ma'am, but I don't see that you have any incentive to offer. It sounds like all work with nothing in exchange.”

“That's not all. The man must agree to divorce me when the ranch has reached a certain degree of profitability.”

Salty threw up his hands. “Whoa. You've just given a man every reason
not
to accept your proposal.”

“In exchange for the divorce, I will give him half my ranch.”

Surprise caused a quick intake of breath, a sudden jump in Salty's heart rate. What was left of his parents' farm had been directly in the path of General Sherman's march through Georgia. When the Union army moved on, they left nothing standing. Salty had been trying to accustom himself to the prospect of working for someone else for the rest of his life. He wasn't a tradesman and had no desire to live in a town. He'd saved everything he'd earned working for George, but the only land he'd be able to afford in the foreseeable future was much farther west where the Indians still roamed and it was too dry to farm.

“I can't believe you can't find anyone to take you up on your offer. Most ex-soldiers will never get the chance to own land.”

“I haven't made the offer because I haven't found anyone I felt I could trust.”

“Do you trust me?”

“I don't know you well enough to answer that question.”

She was being evasive, not meeting his gaze, her hands twisting in her lap. She even shifted in her seat. Something was nagging at her, and he meant to find out what it was.

“Why did you come here instead of going to San Antonio? Surely you could have found dozens of men there eager to take you up on your offer.”

She looked directly at him. “Nine men have worked for me in the six years since my husband left, but there wasn't one among them I would trust enough to marry. I came here because I was told George Randolph had hired some of the most trustworthy and dependable men in the area.”

“If George thinks I'm dependable and trustworthy—you can ask him and Rose if you like—then you can, too.”

She was avoiding his gaze again. He liked looking at her eyes. They were so large they seemed to dominate her face. They were an indeterminate shade that could go from blue to green depending on her setting. Or mood. They were impossible to ignore. They pulled you in.

“It's not just a matter of trust.”

“What else?” She was hiding something, something she didn't want him to know.

“I don't think you're the right person.”

“Why?” He wasn't going to give up easily. This was the chance he'd been hoping for since he left Georgia.

“You're too young.”

“I expect I'm older than you.”

“Probably, but you're young enough to want to marry and start your own family. I need someone who's beyond that. Besides, being young could present other problems.”

“What problems?” He had an idea where she was going, but he wanted her to spell it out. She dropped her gaze to her lap and her hands started to twist again.

“Young men have…needs. I understand that, but it would be embarrassing to have a man presumed to be my husband consorting with women of that type.”

“It wouldn't be a problem if everyone knew our marriage was simply a business arrangement.”

She looked up. “You would be my legal husband. Who would believe you never entered my bed?”

She had a point. Women had few legal rights, wives virtually none and no protection against a husband.

“Why not make the same offer without marriage?”

“I have my reputation to consider. No one is going to believe a man can live with me for several years without…” She left the sentence unfinished. “If my reputation weren't enough, I have two children to consider. Anything that hurts me would hurt them even more. An older man, especially one who has had children of his own, would be better able to control his appetites and understand my children.”

“Not every man is going to be able to understand your children's very different needs regardless of their age or if they've had children of their own. Jared needs to believe he's as much a man as anyone with two good legs. You've allowed Ellen to act like a boy for so long she doesn't know how to be a girl.”

“She's only seven. She has plenty of time to learn to be a girl.”

“Not when she's been brought up to value herself according to what we expect of a boy. Have you told her how pretty she is? Put her in a frilly dress?”

Stung by his criticism, Sarah met his gaze squarely. “I do
not
treat her like a boy, nor do I value her only for the work she does. I tell her she's pretty a dozen times a day. I've made dresses for her, but she won't wear them.
She
is the one who has decided that she must do the work that would normally be expected of Jared.
She
is the one who insists on taking care of him. When I've asked her why she feels she has to do so much, she tells me it's because she's been given the body Jared should have had. She knows better than anyone what being crippled has done to him.” She didn't speak again until her breathing had slowed. “I'm sorry if I've spoken too forcefully, but I won't allow anyone to criticize my children.”

Salty did a little mental backpedaling of his own. He hadn't meant to criticize her, only point out what he saw as problems. “I don't think my lack of years will be a bar in understanding your children,” Salty said. “It might even be a help. They wouldn't see me as so different from them.”

“For a seven-year-old, thirty is old.”

“I'm only twenty-seven.”

“You're older than I am.”

“A man should be older than his wife.”

“We're not talking about a normal husband-wife arrangement,” Sarah reminded him.

“What if they start to like the man and feel about him as they would their father? Do you mean to tell them it's a marriage in name only?”

“Yes.”

“How are they going to react?”

He could tell from her confusion she didn't have an answer to that. “I don't know, but I can't lie to them.”

He had to give her credit for bedrock honesty. If she agreed to accept him, he would never be in doubt of where things stood between them. He didn't want any emotional entanglements, either. He believed people were incapable of living together peacefully. Sooner or later there would be another war somewhere. He had no intention of fathering sons to die anonymous deaths on some battlefield, be it distant or near.

“Are those your only objections to me?” he asked Sarah.

She stood and crossed to a window that provided a view of the lane leading up to the ranch house. Right now it was a rough path cut through the stark landscape. George and Jeff had already outlined plans for plantings of trees, shrubs, and flowers that would meld the house and its setting. They were still discussing what to do about the other buildings.

“This is rather difficult to say,” Sarah said without turning around to face Salty. “I don't wish to hire anyone I find attractive. I'm no different from other women. I get lonely. You seem to be a very nice man. Once I get to know you, it's possible I might begin to think of a different kind of relationship.” She turned around, her expression set. “My life has been controlled by men who took no thought for my comfort, wishes, or happiness. Things have been difficult since my husband left, but it has been
my
life. I want it to stay that way.”

Salty was surprised a woman as pretty as Sarah would find him attractive. That hadn't occurred often. When it came to expressing any feeling that was important to him, his tongue would promptly tie itself in knots, and nothing he said would make any sense.

“Since you've put your cards on the table, it's only fair that I do the same,” Salty said. “I think you're a very pretty woman, but I'm not much for romance. I can never think of sweet things to say, and I can't imagine why a man would want to sit out of an evening in the moonlight unless it's summer and it's hotter inside the house. You can stop worrying that I'll turn into some kind of lovesick calf. Even Rose says I'm a hopeless case.”

Sarah's smile was strained. “It can't be that bad.”

“Probably worse, but that's not all I wanted to say. Everything my family had was destroyed in the war. Taking you up on your offer is the best chance I'll ever have of getting some land of my own. A man needs something of his own just to call himself a man. If you'll pick me, I promise not to have a single romantical notion in my head. And if you start getting them, I'll be so cold and mean you'll get shut of them faster than a calf with a wolf on its tail can bleat for its mama.”

Sarah's smile seemed genuine, but it didn't look like anything Salty had said had caused her to change her mind. He got to his feet.

“I've said my piece so I'll go. There are other fellas here, all good men. Maybe you'll find one of them more to your liking.”

“It's not a matter of liking. It's—”

“I understand. I'm just not what you want.”

She appeared about to say something else but didn't.

“I expect you'll want to join everybody in the kitchen. It's the last door down the hall on your right. You can't miss it. There's always some kind of commotion wherever Rose happens to be.”