No Other Love (A Walker Island Romance, Book 2) (11 page)

Brian brushed his fingertips lightly across her lower lip. “I didn’t do it for them.”

No, he’d done it to make
her
happy. And that was exactly how she felt when she'd been with him last night. Happy. Safe. And calm for the first time in a very long time, like she didn’t have to keep running as fast as she could just to keep up.

“What do you have planned with Natalie?” Brian asked.

“She’d like to tour some universities in New York, and I was going to give her a few tips on places to stay, along with some activities and groups to check out while she’s there. After all she’s done here for me, the least I can do is help her plan properly so that she can get the most out of the experience.”

“She’s lucky that she's got you to help her.”

“And you as her teacher. Although,” Morgan added, “since I still don't have anywhere near all the answers, a part of me wonders how much I can really help.”

“A lot,” Brian said, with utter certainty. “Besides, lately I've been thinking that maybe we don’t have to have everything planned. Maybe sometimes it’s enough to just go with what we feel.”

She knew he was waiting for her to agree, but when she remained silent, instead of pushing her, he simply said, “How about I make you dinner tonight to celebrate your successful press interviews and the official public launch of your new venture?”

“I’d love that, and if you wanted to make me breakfast-for-dinner so that I can really enjoy your French toast and bacon, I probably wouldn’t complain.”

“With all the naps you take,” Brian said with a smile as he continued to hold her close, “it’s no surprise that breakfast is the only meal that you're ever in the mood for considering you’ve always just woken up.”

He had a point. Especially since as she stood there in Brian’s kitchen, on the island where she’d been born and raised, Morgan suddenly felt like a part of her that she hadn’t known about before had finally woken up, too.

* * *

Morgan barely had time to shower and change before Natalie came by her house. From the extremely curious and speculative way that Emily and Paige looked at Morgan when she walked into the living room, it was obvious that Natalie’s presence was the only thing stopping them from asking for all the juicy details. She'd texted the night before to let them know that she wouldn't be coming home because she was staying with Brian, but had left the rest of it up to their imaginations.

Morgan showed Natalie through to the living room where she opened her laptop and pulled a map of New York out of her bag. Emily came in just long enough to ask if they wanted coffee, and it seemed to catch Natalie a little by surprise, realizing that her school guidance counselor was a normal person like anyone else.

“What we need for you,” Morgan said, “are hotels that are going to be affordable for your family while still being in a nice part of town.”

“Is New York that dangerous?” Natalie asked, and Morgan realized that since the biggest city Natalie had ever been to was Seattle, as exciting as all the opportunities in front of her seemed, they were also pretty frightening, too.

“There are some dangerous parts, but where you'll be touring, you really just need to know where you’re going and pay attention. Somewhere in Prospect Heights might work for a place to use as your home base.” Morgan drew a circle on the map. “I’m just sorry I don’t have the room to put you up when you come to visit.” As nice as her apartment was back in New York, it was still only a one-bedroom walkup.

So different from this house on the island, Morgan thought as she heard the door open and Rachel come in with Charlotte. Her cute little niece would no doubt demand to be allowed to help her aunt once she saw that she was drawing on maps. Morgan could also hear the faint sounds of Emily debating something with Michael, which meant that he must have come around to fix something again. Paige chimed in every once in a while, and Grams was probably down at the dance studio. Yet, the house still seemed to have enough room in it for everyone to have their own space when they wanted it.

Until she’d come back this summer, Morgan hadn’t realized how much she missed having her family around her while still having the space to do all that she needed to do. When Morgan had been younger, she’d worried that returning to the island would feel like being trapped. However, now that she'd spent several weeks here, she realized it hadn’t been like that at all. The others weren’t trying to trap her, they were supporting her. Especially Brian.

So then, why had she always believed she needed to run from them all?

Morgan looked back down at the map. “There are so many things to see in this neighborhood, and the restaurants are just great.” She smiled at Natalie. “You must be so excited about all this. You have
such
a bright future ahead of you.”

Morgan could see the girl's future laid out as clearly as the map was. College, summer internships, postgraduate work, all leading up to a job doing anything she wanted. Whatever Natalie put her mind to, Morgan was sure that she would succeed even beyond their already tall expectations.

Natalie smiled at the compliment, but as she looked back down at the map, Morgan noticed that her smile had slipped a little.

“What is it, Natalie? What’s wrong?”

The girl was silent for a few moments before she finally said, “It’s kind of complicated, and you’ve already helped me so much with everything else.”

“I know all about complicated,” Morgan assured her. She'd left Brian's house a little while ago feeling warm and soft and dreamy, but looking at the New York City map and thinking about being back there soon had quickly brought back up every single one of her conflicting thoughts about Brian and the island. “Trust me, Natalie. Whatever it is, you can tell me, and I’ll do my best to help you.”

“It’s just that I’ve been having these…these feelings. For Tad. I never thought that a guy like him would ever look twice at a girl like me, and I know this might sound bad, but I also kind of thought that he was just some dumb jock. The thing is, he’s not. He’s so sweet, and good-looking, and he listens so well. He's smart, too.” She looked really distraught over it all. “I don't know what to do. Not like I used to. Not like I always have.”

The answer should have been obvious. Morgan should have been telling Natalie that Tad was sweet, but with the future she had lined up ahead of her, she couldn't afford to let it all fall by the wayside for a boy. Morgan should have been telling her that leaving him behind was the hard thing to do, but that sometimes the hard thing was the
right
thing.

The problem was...Morgan could still feel not only the brush of Brian's hands and mouth over her skin, and the pure, sweet joy of being with him, but also how badly she wanted to be with him again, safe and warm in his arms.

If Natalie had asked her this question when Morgan had first come to the island, the answer would have been simple. She would have told Natalie to go forward in the direction of her big dreams and not look back, because she would find everything she wanted, including someone to love, out there in the world. Yet did it ever actually work like that? Because if she were being completely honest with herself, Morgan had never actually found anyone, or anything, to replace the only person she’d ever really loved. A truly incredible man who had come to mean more to her with every moment she'd spent with him these past few weeks.

“What’s more important?” Natalie asked as Morgan's brain spun in circles. “Is it my career? Is it everything I’ve got lined up and all of my dreams? Or is it Tad? Because I think I love him, Morgan.”

Morgan felt utterly out of her depth, but then suddenly she heard her grandmother's voice in her head.
“It isn’t the place that matters. It isn’t even what you do. So long as you're happy, that's the only thing that matters. But some things, I think, we've just got to figure out for ourselves
.
”

“I wish I could tell you what to do, Natalie, but the truth is that I've been asking myself the same questions. All I know is that whatever decisions we make, both of us need to be happy. Because that's the most important thing of all.”

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

A short while later, Morgan made sure her game face was on as the reporters approached. “Xander, Stephanie, I’m so glad you could make it. How was the trip over on the ferry?”

“Wavy,” the female reporter replied, one hand over her stomach, clearly not someone with sea legs. “This is what has taken you away from the red carpet for the last few weeks?” The woman looked around the land as if she wasn't quite sure what to make of it. “Gardening?”

Morgan smiled at the group of reporters who had gathered around her. “As I'm sure my publicist told you, I will be launching my new makeover show soon. In conjunction with that, I will also be bringing out my own makeup line. Only, what I'm doing is about more than just wanting to see my name on lipstick cases.” Morgan explained about the island, about her family’s history, and about resurrecting the old Walker plot with the help of local students.

“Are you saying that you’ve come back here in search of special ingredients you can’t find elsewhere?” a reporter from the
Los Angeles Journal
asked.

“It’s certainly true that the island’s unique microclimate means it’s good for growing a wide range of potential ingredients. But the magic ingredient is less about the varietals of berries that I'm growing and more about the love and attention that come from working with my family and friends and the entire community to get this garden growing again, the way it used to when the island was first founded. I've been thrilled to have had a great deal of success working as a makeup artist off of the island, but now I'd like to see if I can bring the island back in via Walker Cosmetics.”

As if on cue, Brian’s car pulled up next to the reporters’ rental cars. “In fact, here is my team of helpers right now. This is Brian Russell, the school's science teacher and football coach, along with Tad Burrows and Natalie Fields, who have done great jobs as my interns. Perhaps I could give everyone a tour of the garden first, and then we can divide up so that you can all get the interviews you need?”

None of which was what Morgan wanted to do right then. Not when every cell in her body was urging her to rush over to Brian and kiss him.

No
, she reminded herself,
you need to focus on the reporters and on your career that you've worked so hard to build.
But even as she worked to focus, she couldn't help but wonder,
What about love? When does that get to come first?

Fortunately, Brian was the one who stepped in to help shift her focus back to the job at hand by beginning the tour of the garden. A few minutes later he deftly passed it off to her so that she could explain how the four of them had mixed in new, sustainable plants with the legacy plants that had already been in the plot. She showed them the “before” pictures of the plot to show just how much work had gone into transforming the garden. And when a few of them questioned whether she'd actually gotten her fingernails dirty working in the garden or if she'd simply overseen her crew while
they
got dirty, she rolled up her sleeves and showed them where the brambles had cut into her skin. She didn't take offense at their disbelief. It wasn't their world, so they naturally assumed it wasn't hers, either.

Because they think I’m one of them
. A
part of their same world of celebrities and fashion advice, red carpets and premieres.

Only, she'd grown up in this garden and on the water all around the island, and the truth was that it was as much a part of her as the glitz and glamour of working on movies.

As the reporters drank the fresh raspberry lemonade that she'd made for them and the sun shone down over the island, making everything around them positively glow, Morgan knew the scene couldn't have been more PR perfect. She should have been rejoicing that everything had come together even better than she'd hoped it would. And yet...it was so hard to keep playing this game in which she was acting like she had it all together and knew exactly what she was doing, when she felt pulled into two completely different directions on the inside.

Morgan had done enough interviews to be able to confidently make it through the rest of the afternoon with the reporters, but every few questions, she couldn’t help but look across the garden at Brian, if only to reassure herself that he was still there. Each time he smiled back at her, her heart beat just a little harder, just a little faster.

Finally, the reporters got everything they needed and left to catch the ferry back to the mainland. Natalie and Tad left shortly after that.

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked when they were finally alone again.

She wanted so badly to step into his arms and just let him hold her, but she knew she first had to share with him what she was feeling. “Natalie asked me a question earlier today that I haven't been able to stop thinking about. She wanted me to tell her what was more important—her career or what she feels for Tad?”

Brian's gaze was steady on hers as he asked, “What did you tell her?”

“I should have told her to follow her dreams. I should have told her to be brave and go out into the big wide world after what she wants so that she can become everything that she’s meant to be. It’s the right advice.”

“Is it?”

“It’s what I did. If I hadn’t gone, I wouldn’t have any of what I have now. I wouldn’t have my successful career or my upcoming makeup line. I wouldn’t have a makeover show with a major network.” So why hadn't she been able to say that to Natalie?

“I agree,” he surprised her by saying. “You wouldn't have any of those things if you hadn't left the island. But you didn't say any of that to her?”

“I told her that I didn’t know what the answer was. Why would I do something like that? I
hate
that I was so wishy-washy when she was looking to me for advice. I hate…”

“What do you hate, Morgan?”

“I hate how confused I feel about everything. I hate that things aren’t crystal clear the way I used to think they were. I have everything I thought I ever wanted. A thriving career. A big bank account. Fame. You know how you hear about these celebrities who have the nerve to be unhappy with their lives?” She made a face. “I
should
be happy. I should be ecstatic. And for seven years, I’ve thought that I was. But ever since I came back to the island, it feels like everything has shifted around under me. I shouldn’t feel like I’m falling apart because”—
because of you—
“just because I’ve come back. But this is what the island always does to me!” And what
he
did to her. Because when she was around Brian, nothing else seemed to matter.