Authors: Danielle Pearl
Really?
Though, I don't know why this surprises me. My father is only interested in my life when a Forbes is involved. I'm sure "grilling" is an exaggeration, but the thought that my dad might care about me or something I do gets my attention. The thought of him worrying after me positively melts me.
"What'd he say?" I ask. Because he's said nothing to me. Not one word.
Cam rolls his eyes. He gets along with my dad just fine, but I know Cam doesn't like how much my father ignores me lately. Cam is the only one who knows how much I crave my father's affection, even if I put up a good front, even to him.
"He asked me if Forbes' intentions were honorable," he murmurs, but I can tell from his tone that there's more, and I look at him expectantly, knowing he won't lie to me, not even to spare my feelings. "He wanted to know if Forbes might get serious about you or if he's just messin' around. I think he wants to know if he should get his hopes up at the chance of bein' future father-in-law to the great Robin Forbes." He speaks quickly, hating reporting anything that might hurt me, even though I just laugh it off as I always do. It's not as if I wasn't aware of the impetus for my father's sudden interest in my life.
"What'd you say?" I ask, and I know Cam can detect the disappointment in my voice. He slings an arm around my shoulder.
"I told him that if a guy like Forbes was gonna get serious about anybody, it'd be you Rory girl," he says meaningfully. I turn to face him.
"Do you really think that?" I ask. I don't think Cam would say something he didn't think was true just to make me feel better, but I can't be sure. I know he doesn't lie to me, but I also know he'd do practically anything to prevent me from being hurt, and this me-dating thing is new territory for the both of us.
"Is that what you want, Ror? To get serious with Forbes?" Cam's voice has grown quiet and I can't account for its intensity.
"I don't even really know him. I just know I don't want him to, you know, just be messin' around," I explain.
Cam offers me a half smile tinted with a hint of relief. "Look, I'm not in his head, but if he was just looking to get laid, he'd just keep doin' what he's been doin', right? He wouldn't be pursuing a good girl like you. I can't blame him though, you're beautiful, sweet... the kinda girl you marry. Not the kind you mess around with. He knows that." I know Cam's sincere, but just because Cam believes it doesn't mean it's true for Robin.
"You're just sayin' that 'cause you love me," I grumble and fall dramatically down onto my bed, face up. Cam stares down at me a moment, seemingly bemused, before smiling the warm, familiar, best-friend smile he reserves just for me.
"Yeah, I'm sayin' that 'cause I love you," he agrees. "Anyway, why you freaking out, Rory girl?" he asks, sitting down beside me.
"I don't know how to go on a date, Cam, you know that," I murmur.
"There's no 'how’ to it, Ror. You just go, be yourself, and have fun. Don't do anything you don't wanna do. Don't do anything you
do
wanna do if you think
I
don't want you doin' it."
I sit up. "So you mean don't do what
you
usually do on a date."
Cam shakes his head. "I don't 'date', Ror. I don't give girls roses or say pretty things. But yeah, don't do what I usually do." He's looking at me meaningfully and waiting for me to call him out on his hypocrisy, which I normally would. But I don't, because I'm nowhere near ready to do any of those things anyway. Instead, I change the subject.
"Cam, he's gonna kiss me," I mutter shyly. Why am I suddenly shy with Cam? I've slept with him in his bed a hundred times for God’s sake.
Cam scowls for a moment, but wipes it off quickly on an exhale. "Yeah, Ror, I imagine that he is," he concedes.
"I don't know how to kiss."
Cam gives me one of our conversational looks. He's asking me where I'm going with this.
"Will you teach me?"
"There's nothing to teach, Ror, you either let him or you don't. Do you want him to kiss you?" he asks.
"I think I do," I admit. There's his scowl again. "But I don't know what to do! I won't be any good at it, can't you show me?"
"
Show
you?! Rory girl, I think you've up and lost your damn mind," he says before standing up and facing away from me. Not what I expected.
"But you know how to kiss - you've kissed tons of girls! And from what I hear you're pretty good at it," I reply, playing to his ego.
"Pretty good?" he smirks wickedly. "Now I doubt that's the way you're new little girl friends described me."
He's right. According to Lacey he's incredible, and I can't help but let my gaze drift to his lips.
"Don't you look at me like that, Ror," he whispers.
I meet his eyes again. "Like what?"
He stares at me a moment, then shakes his head as if to clear it. "You'll be fine, Ror, I'm sure you'll be great. Don't worry about it. If it feels right, go with it, if it doesn't, then don't do it, okay?"
I stamp my foot like a four year old. "But you offered to teach me before! I didn't need it then. I need it now!" I argue.
Cam chuckles, and like always, the sound of his laugh banishes all of my tension. "We were thirteen! It's different now. I can't just kiss you, Ror!"
"Of course you can," I whisper, and take a step forward. I can hear his sharp intake of breath. He's conflicted, but I don't understand why.
What's the big deal?
Cam takes a step back and turns from me. I can't help but feel rejected, even though I know it's irrational.
"Cam?"
He turns back to me and takes my hand, sits on the edge of my bed, and pulls me so that I'm seated beside him. "Ror, I ain't gonna kiss you. You know I'd do anything for you, like you said, I love you. But your first kiss should be with someone you like
that
way, not your best friend."
"Ugh. Whatever. Thanks a lot, Cam."
He smiles wryly. "Anyway, it was one thing back when we were kids, before you got all hot and shit. You think I can kiss you sittin' here in your bedroom, with you wearin' that sexy little dress, and not get a-"
"Cameron Foster!" I stop him before he describes his theoretical erection and we both crack up laughing.
There was never anything strange or awkward about our friendship growing up, except when he first hit puberty and had little control over when he sported wood. For a good year, this was the source of endless teasing from my end, and now he's using it against me.
Fair enough.
The doorbell rings and I jump up and look back at him for some reassurance.
"I look okay?" I ask.
He stands and takes my hand, rubbing little circles into the back of mine with his thumb. He always does this when I'm worrying about something. "You look beautiful, Rory girl. Too beautiful. You call me if you need me. I'll come get you. I mean it," he assures me.
"I know, Cam, thanks."
Cam nods toward my door, his expression telling me to stop stalling and to get going if I'm going to go. So I do, with him right on my heels.
****
Robin is standing in the front hall talking about next week's football game with my dad. My dad gives me a kiss on the cheek and tells me to have a good time before excusing himself. I try to convince myself that the first small ounce of affection my father has offered me in a year was not for Robin's benefit. Cam is still standing behind me on the bottom step and I turn back to give him a "get lost" look, but he just gives me one right back that tells me he isn't going anywhere. I turn back to Robin as he produces a bouquet of white roses, clearly the dozen from which the windshield rose came this afternoon. I can't help but blush and quietly thank him. He greets Cam kind of coldly considering they're teammates and sort of friends. Cam's response is equally icy.
"Remember what we talked about, Forbes," Cam murmurs, before giving me a kiss on the cheek and heading back toward the kitchen. To an outsider it would appear as if he were just going to hang out in my house, but I know he's just taking the back door out to go back home. Our back doors are closer to one another than our front doors and they're what we've always used since we were kids. I excuse myself briefly to put the flowers in water then rejoin Robin in the foyer.
He leads me out to his car and opens my door for me before pulling out of the driveway to start heading toward town.
"You look real pretty, Rory," he says with a grin. "I like the dress."
I blush profusely and politely thank him.
"I made reservations at the club, if that's okay?"
"Sure," I reply.
The country club. Wow. Our parents are all members, sure, but for high school students to be having dinner there is kind of a big deal. I'd have heard about it if he'd brought dates there before. It occurs to me that he's actually trying to impress me, and I can't help but smile to myself.
"What's that pretty little smile for?" he asks, and I chew my bottom lip to force it away.
"Nothin'. I just didn't realize you took dates to the club for dinner is all," I admit.
Now it's his turn to smile. "I don't, sweetheart. But you're not just some date, are you?" I search for the jest in his tone, but he sounds so sincere.
"I'm not?"
"'Course you're not." He doesn't elaborate, and I don't ask him to.
Robin pulls up in the club's circular drive and waves off the valet who comes to open my door in order to do it himself. He places his hand in the small of my back to lead me inside and I'm surprised by the way it makes me feel. I'm still nervous, but I feel special, like I matter. And the feeling is new to me. I like it.
"Hey, what did Cam mean? When he said to remember what y'all talked about?" I ask, recalling the curious exchange. It's not like Cam to keep something from me, especially a conversation that obviously concerned me. Robin smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes.
He leans into me like he's going to tell me a secret. "He meant for me to remember that if I hurt you, he'll kill me."
My jaw drops.
Cam said what?
Robin sees my shock and chuckles.
"He cares about you, sweetheart. You're not just the prettiest girl in this town, but you're innocent - like an angel. He's worried I'll take advantage. If I was him, I'd 'a been worried too. But I told him that you're special, and that I'm not stupid enough not to know it."
It's a sweet thing to say, and with his words, my nerves melt away. Robin smiles and takes my hand as the hostess leads us to a table overlooking the golf course.
Dinner is way more comfortable than I'd anticipated. Conversation flows naturally, and Robin tells me about the team this year, about our opponents for next week's game and strategy. He talks about college scouts that'll be at the games and the recruiters that have been hounding him since last year. Robin explains that while it's polite to entertain them all, his dad would never even consider him going anywhere other than UFL. I already knew that. It's where both our dads went for their undergraduate pre-law degrees.
"Where would you wanna go? I mean if you weren't already committed to Gainesville since birth," I ask.
He looks back at me, bemused. "Ya know, sweetheart, I think you may just be the first person to ever ask me that."
"Really?" I ask, and he smiles.
"Really. But I suppose it doesn't matter, does it? What about you? Your daddy sendin' you to Gainesville too or do you get a choice?"
I shrug. "I don't really know. When I was little he always talked about me going to Gainesville. At least for undergrad. But lately he doesn't really seem to care what I do. I've thought about goin' to New York. NYU. Like my mom. I don't think it'd matter to my dad either way now, but I suppose I'll end up at UFL."
Just in case it might please him
,
I add silently. Robin nods sympathetically.
"I bet you're wrong, ya know. He cares. How could he not?" Robin murmurs.
I shrug again I've often wondered the same thing myself lately. "Tonight's the first night in a long while that he even seemed to give a damn what I was doin', and that's only 'cause I was goin' out with his favorite high school football star," I grumble, and then flush bright red when I realize I've just said that out loud. Robin signals for the check. He reaches across the table for my hand and his touch surprises me again. It's comforting. Sweet.
"If that's true then he's a damn fool."
****
When Robin pulls up into my driveway, I'm disappointed. I've been having such a good time, and really, I don't want it to end quite yet. He opens my door and offers his hand and I climb out. He glances at my house and then back at me.
"Ya know, this is the part where I kiss you goodnight, but I'm not sure I'm ready for the night to end just yet," he echoes my own thoughts as he lightly strokes his fingers up and down my arm.
I swallow nervously.
"You think you, uh, wanna go for a walk around the block?"
I laugh. "Seriously?"