Not Quite Enough (Not Quite series) (26 page)

“W-what are you doing here?” Speaking clogged her dry throat. Staring into the face of her ex was simply too much the minute she woke from surgery. Where was Jessie?

“I couldn’t stay away. Good God, Monica, I thought I’d lost you.”

John held her hand in his, kissed her fingers. Pain sat behind his eyes.

“You didn’t need to come.” He shouldn’t have come. Hadn’t she made herself clear before she left?

He wasn’t listening. The gentle stroke of his fingers along her hand began to feel like an emery board grinding a fine layer of her skin away. “I had to come. I love you, Monica.”

She closed her eyes, not ready to hear his confession, nor ready to tell him she wanted nothing to do with his love. Her feelings weren’t on the same level as his. He knew this.

“Where’s Jessie?” She needed her sister to intervene.

“She and Jack went to the cafeteria.”

“John…”

“You don’t have to say anything. When I was told you were missing, that they thought something awful happened to you, I realized that I can’t walk away from you.”

“You didn’t walk away. I did.”

John’s grip on her hand increased, his eyes stayed with her as if he didn’t hear a thing she said.

“We can talk about this later,” he told her. Not that her mind would change about their relationship.

“Yes. Please.” Monica reached for the call light, desperate for any intervention.

Nurse Hard-Ass walked in, a rare smile on her face. One glance and she asked John to leave the room.

“I’ll wait outside.”

Once he was out of hearing range, Monica whispered to the nurse. “Please have him stay in the waiting room.”

The nurse narrowed her eyes. “He said he was your fiancé.”

Monica squeezed her eyes closed and shook her head. “No. He’s not. Where’s my sister? I need Jessie.”

“OK, OK, I’ll get her. Calm down.”

“Please.”

The nurse stepped out of the room and spoke with John just beyond the door. “I’m going to have to ask you stay in the lobby for now.”

“I’m a nurse,” John argued.

“And a friend. You know the rules. She just woke up and isn’t ready for visitors.”

Just go, John.

The sound of footsteps moving away from the room helped calm her rapid heartbeat.

“Thank you,” Monica said when the nurse came back in the room.

Twenty minutes later Jessie walked into the room, a smile on her face. “Look who’s awake.”

Monica attempted a smile. “Is John still out there?”

Jessie slid into the chair. “In the lobby. How come I don’t know about him? He said you guys were serious.”

“Since when am I serious about anyone?” she asked. “He wanted serious, I cut him off.”

“Oh.” Jessie’s face fell.

“I need my sister to get him out of here. I can’t deal with him right now. I told him we were over before I went to Jamaica.”

“He probably got scared like the rest of us when we heard you were missing.”

“Yeah, but it didn’t change how I feel about him. Please, Jessie. I need my big sister to make the man go away.”

Jessie giggled and stood. “Consider it done.”

Monica shivered. “Be nice. OK. I know he wanted more. Tell him I’ll talk to him when I get home.”

“I’m the good cop, remember. Just relax.”

Jessie started toward the door.

“Jessie?”

“I’m not getting very far here, sis.”

“I know. Have you seen Trent?”

“No.”

“Oh, OK. Well, he can come in. You know… if he shows up.”

Jessie offered a smile and a wink. “Got it. Anyone else I should know about?”

Monica wished she had something to throw at her sister, instead she settled on a wicked look.

Trent didn’t show up. And once they transferred her out of the ICU the next day and into a private room Monica called reception and asked if Trent Fairchild was still a patient and could her call be transferred to his room. Monica was met with the response, “Mr. Fairchild was released yesterday afternoon.”

Monica stared at the phone in her hand for several minutes, all the while thinking,
He said he’d come by.

Jessie and Jack flew with Monica to their home in Texas. It didn’t matter that Monica lived in California, there was no way around letting her big sister take care of her until she could walk.

It wasn’t like there was a rush to return to her home anyway. Deb, her friend from work, had called on several occasions, checking up on her and giving Monica the rundown of the ER drama.

Walt had returned in a fiery fit about Monica’s job being placed on hold. Once she was able, she’d have to go in front of the review board to see if the hospital had grounds to terminate her. For once, maybe being a part of the union would be helpful. She’d fight the issue now if she was able to work.

John had returned home after sending a massive bouquet of flowers with a card. He added accolades of their time together and how he wanted to take up where they’d left off. He agreed he’d rushed their relationship and wanted another shot at being her perfect guy.

The letter should have made her heart do something other than freeze. The fact that when she did return she’d have to once again put him off made her tired. It was hard enough to tell the guy they were over the first time. Now after he’d flown all the way across the country only to be put on the next plane home after one brief audience, it was going to be even harder doing it again. If she were in high school, she might send Jessie to do it for her.

Sometimes being an adult sucked.

“Maybe I should play for the other team,” she said one day while perched in Jessie’s den watching DVDs of
Supernatural
and
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
. Katie stayed behind in Texas and was “babysitting” Monica while Jessie and Jack were out shopping for some family surprise they planned on presenting that night.

Katie had tucked Savannah into bed for a nap and it was just the two of them watching mindless television. Well, Sam and Dean weren’t mindless, but the play of muscles as they kicked another demon’s ass was mind-numbing.

“The way you’re drooling over this show proves you could never
play for the other team
.”

They’d been talking about guys and Monica’s inability to connect with any of them.

“Well I’ve got to do something. I’m obviously the problem.”

“Why do you say that?” Katie had set up shop at Monica’s feet and proceeded to paint her toenails. A pedicure was out of the question, but with her toes peeking out from beneath the temporary cast Katie thought it was her duty to gussy her up.

Monica ate up the sister time. Though not a sister by blood, Katie was a sister of the heart. Jessie really lucked out when hooking up with Jack. His entire family was something out of Mayberry only loaded to the umpteenth degree.

“I don’t want them for very long. I swear I should have been a guy.”

Katie laughed, holding the polish aside to avoid a smudge. “Because you enjoy sex without strings?”

“Because I enjoy sex and want them to leave when we’re done.”

Katie regarded her with a tilted chin. “You don’t do the cuddle thing? Spooning?”

There’d been only one guy she’d come close to spooning. And that was in a cave while doing her best I’m-going-to-die-soon interpretation. “Not really.”

Katie bent her head toward her task, blew on Monica’s toes. “What about the guy in Jamaica?”

Monica’s head popped up. “Trent?”

“Well at least you know his name. Some guys don’t bother to remember the girl’s name.”

“He doesn’t count.”

Katie moved on to her other foot. “Oh, why not?”

“Near-death experiences have a way of skewing the facts.”

“What facts are those?”

“That we were never going to be anything but temporary. A nice diversion from the crap on that island.” OK, a
mind-blowing
diversion. A
rock your world
diversion. A
nocturnal emissions
diversion.

“There’s that look again, darlin’. And you’re not even watching the hottie on the TV.”

“What look?”

“The ‘Is it getting warm in here?’ look. So, you and this Trent guy… you spooned?”

“Not spooned so much as he was my personal pillow. The cave was pitch black at night. And so damn quiet.” She shivered with the memory. “I could hear the constant drip from the hole above into the pool of poisoned water and kept thinking I knew what Chinese water torture felt like. The only thing that broke it up was if it started to rain.”

Memories flooded her senses. The smell of the cave, of Trent. He’d certainly become more earthy as the days had passed but Monica had never been put off by it. They used the one towel to wash off as best they could, but a lack of shower for that many days resulted in discomfort. She still hadn’t been able to take a completely proper shower. A bath with her leg hanging out to avoid soaking her cast was the best she could manage. She wondered if Trent lingered in the hot spray for an hour once given the opportunity.

“I’ll bet you were scared,” Katie said, pulling Monica out of her thoughts.

“Shitless. But he made it better. We talked about stupid stuff. Old movies, whatever we could to get our mind off the fact that we might… well, that we might not make it out.”

Katie sighed. “And you spooned.”

“Cuddled. Kind of.”

They paused for a moment, both thinking and not talking.

Then Katie said, “Sounds like you connected with him.”

Monica shrugged. “Must not have. He didn’t even say good-bye when he left.”

“But you wanted him to?”

No. Actually… Monica didn’t want to say good-bye at all.

“We’re pregnant.” Jack stood at the head of the table with Jessie at his side and made the announcement just about everyone was expecting.

Monica glanced over at Katie and said, “You owe me five bucks.”

Katie rolled her eyes and Jessie laughed. “You guys knew?”

“Guessed,” Monica told her.

Gaylord walked around the table and bear-hugged his daughter-in-law before taking Jack’s hand in his. “Well, I didn’t know.” His face beamed and his cheeks warmed to a rosy color. He glanced back at Jessie and hugged her again, lifting her off her feet.

With the exception of Monica, everyone took their turn hugging Jessie and Jack and offering advice to Danny. “I’d jump up for a hug, but my jumping days will have to wait.”

Jessie walked over and leaned down for a sister hug. “I’m happy for you,” Monica said.

Jessie lowered her voice. “So different than the first time.”

Monica understood. When Jessie found out she was knocked up in high school, they both thought her life was over. Their mom had been good about it. As much as a mom could be, but never once did Jessie think being a parent on her own at such a young age was going to be a picnic. Still, she brought Danny into the world, alone because the dirtbag who didn’t glove up split soon after she announced she was expecting, and put her life on hold to raise him. This time she’d have a husband, a family to support her… everything a new mom could want.

Monica reached up and hugged Jack. “Congrats, stud man.”

He beamed.

Danny took that moment to pull on Jack’s sleeve. Without hesitating, Jack scooped Danny up into his arms. “Can my baby brother sleep in my room?”

Jack ruffled Danny’s mop of hair. “Maybe. What if you have a baby sister?”

Danny regarded that possibility and dismissed it. “I don’t think Mommy can have girls.”

Jack shook his head and laughed. “She might have a girl.”

“As long as she doesn’t have too many dolls, she can sleep in my room.”

The adults at the table laughed.

They settled into their seats again, and champagne was served to everyone but Jessie, who opted for milk in a crystal flute.

Sometime before the meal was over, Danny asked a question that had Jack earning his daddy stripes.

“Daddy?”

“Yeah, sport?”

His young brow pitched together as he picked his words carefully.

“How did Mommy get the baby in her belly?”

A hush went over the table.

Katie and Monica exchanged glances and waited Jack’s reply.

“I-I ah, I put the baby there.”