Object Me: A Bad Boy Lawyer Romance (29 page)

I
know
it shouldn’t matter, but it does. Ryan saying how proud he is of me for trying to make it on my own really means a lot. He is a man who came from nothing and has been surviving on his own since he was seventeen. His respect means a lot to me. Theresa’s support means almost as much. In truth, it might even mean more. I wouldn’t be here at all if it weren’t for her help last night.

Even tonight, when I’m stuck here behind the bar doing cleanup, I feel good about the choice I made. My phone vibrates in my pocket and I pull it out to see that it’s my father calling. I am ashamed of myself for the flicker of hope I feel at the possibility that he has changed his mind. Might he actually let me go back to my apartment until I have a better job and more money saved?

I might even invite Theresa to come and stay with me to pay her back for all the generosity she has shown me.

My father quickly brings an end to my day dreaming like a splash of ice water to my face.

“Aria, have you come to your senses? Are you ready to return to Texas and marry Xavier?”

“Dad, I told you, I caught him with another woman. How can you still want me to marry him?”

“I know you are disappointed in Xavier. I am too. But this behavior is not uncommon in men, and technically you are not married. Xavier will learn to practice discretion and show you proper respect. I spoke about this with him this morning and he agrees with me and is very apologetic about what he did. He has assured me it won’t happen again.”

I am beyond hurt by what my father is saying and also left speechless by the cruelty and disrespect he is showing me.

“Xavier mentioned to me that you were at a male strip club and he was feeling insecure about your commitment to the relationship. This helps explain his actions.”

I can’t remain silent anymore. I won’t have Xavier blaming me for what he did. “It most certainly doesn’t explain anything. You think that my going to a club makes it okay for him to have sex with my best friend? Did he tell you they invited me to join them?”

“Stop being dramatic, Aria. You are normally such a practical girl. You need to think about your future and the family business. If you walk away from this engagement, it hurts your mother and me. It also has a tremendous effect on our company. Your actions do not only affect you.”

I feel sick to my stomach at his casual viciousness. Being practical is what brought me to this crossroads. And I question if he is being honest with me about the business. Xavier’s father is the head of the law firm that represents our company, not an investor or rival company. At most, my departure might mean the necessity of finding new lawyers, not the layoffs of hundreds or thousands of workers.

“I’m not a pawn, Father. It’s time for me to take ownership of my life. You’ll just have to find another way to get ahead in business that doesn’t involve whoring out your only daughter.”

“We are done discussing this. What I said yesterday stands. If you are not back at the end of the week and you don’t marry Xavier, your mother and I will be forced to cut you off.”

I want to throw my phone across the bar but now that I’m a working girl, all I can think of is how many drinks I will have to serve before I can replace it. I’m glad Theresa and Ryan weren’t here to overhear the call with my father. Ryan went to change but said he’d be back to take us to a late dinner.

His dance didn’t go as well as he’d planned but I think he still made a lot in tips. I wonder what it would be like to dance for men the way he does for women. Then I remind myself that no man has seen me naked and I don’t care how much money you can make. There is no way I would turn to stripping to cover the bills.

“You done cleaning?” Theresa asks.

She is back from taking the garbage out. She said tomorrow it’s my turn to do trash duty and that I may want to get some mace. Not because of muggers, but because of the rats.

“The rats aren’t afraid of anything and will come at you if you interrupt their dinner.”

I run to the restroom to freshen myself up. I tell myself I’m not doing it for Ryan, but really, who am I kidding. I would never date him though. Not after the way he treated me the other night. That and all the stories Theresa has shared with me about him and women. She says the longest relationship he has had lasted until lunch the second day. I guess I really should thank him for blowing me off. Otherwise I might have done something that I would regret.

Knowing all of this doesn’t change the fact that I want him to find me desirable, though. I take my hair out of the elastic and brush it out over my shoulders. My skin is glowing from the exertion of working behind the bar all night. I wish I had brought something to change into but when Theresa and I left for work, I didn’t think I’d be having dinner with the one and only Ryan Temptation. I suppress a giggle and remind myself that there are quite a few women here tonight that would give their right arm to be in my place. Even if it is just a friendly dinner with friends and absolutely nothing will ever happen between us.

Ryan is leaning against the bar and his eyes rake over me as I approach, causing a delicious shudder to course through my body. I’m glad I took the time to brush my hair and freshen up my make-up.

“Alright kids, lets cool it,” Theresa says. “It’s a PG-rated night for the three of us.”

I pretend to search through my bag to hide the fact that I’m blushing and Ryan says he doesn’t know what PG is.

We take the subway a couple of stops to a neighborhood I have never been to before. It’s not that I’ve never been on the subway before, but it was rare and usually with Ella, who spent the trip mocking the other people on the train. With Ryan and Theresa, we are part of the crowd and no one is judging anyone, or under the impression that they are better than anyone else. However, both Theresa and Ryan tease me for not knowing how to use the turnstile.

Outside of the restaurant, a group of kids are drumming on turned over buckets. Ryan praises their skills and drops what looks to be a twenty into a hat that is partially filled with singles and spare change.

“Oh man,” one of the kids says. “You’re here with two ladies, Ryan? Good for you.”

“Watch it, Jamie. These ladies are good friends of mine. Show them some respect.”

“Hi,” I say. “I’m Aria! Your music is wonderful.”

The other kids start ribbing him about falling in love with me. Theresa rolls her eyes and tells us she is starving and it’s time to stop playing charity and come inside and eat.

“Ignore her,” Ryan tells me. “She talks tough but she’s got the biggest heart of anyone in this city.”

“Trust me, I know. I am a firsthand recipient of that big heart. If it weren’t for Theresa, I don’t know where I would be right now.”

“She told me you’re staying with her. It sounds like a big change from that ranch you told me about,” he says with an irresistible grin.

I want to be offended on Theresa’s behalf and my own but I know it’s meant in good humor.

“Change is good,” I say with an air of confidence I don’t quite feel.

The pub is filled with the after-bar crowd and all of the food is deep fried and covered in cheese. I usually wouldn’t eat this kind of food if my life depended on it but this is the new me, I worked hard all day, and deserve a carb or two or ten.

“Why are you tending bar?” Ryan asks.

No beating around the bush here.

“I need a job and I need the money, New York is expensive,” I say knowingly. At the same time, I do my whole nervous smoothing down my hair thing. So I know I just gave away my insecurity about the situation.

“Whoa there, girl. I know you need a job and money but don’t you have a degree? There has to be something better you could be doing. Theresa and I are working there because it’s our best option, not because it’s desirable.”

“Speak for yourself, asshole,” Theresa says.

I’ve only known them a few days, but I feel a level of camaraderie with them that I never felt with Ella or my other girlfriends. I know that I can be honest with both of them and while they may tease me, they aren’t going to hurt me.

I can’t let myself be distracted by romantic notions of living paycheck-to-paycheck in the city and experiencing the real world
.
I have a degree from a great university and it would be unfair to both myself and my parents who paid for it to let it go to waste. And now that I know Ryan and Theresa, I would feel guilty about not using a degree that they never had the opportunity to get.

On the other hand, right now, this is exactly where I want to be. I have been doing what other people want and expect for as long as I can remember and it feels so good to do what I want for a change.

I realize that Theresa is the kind of friend I have always wanted. She is there for me in a way I could only pretend my other friends were. To stay strong, I only have to remind myself that in two short days, Theresa has proven herself to be a more genuine friend than Ella ever did. Her friendship is without artifice and she doesn’t want anything from me. I know this because I have nothing to offer except my friendship in return.

Ryan, on the other hand, is an anomaly. In my confusion over Xavier, I thought Ryan was my knight in shining armor. Now I know I don’t need to be rescued and that I can take care of myself. But all of the above being true doesn’t change how I feel about him. Even now, when he’s sitting across from me at a table and pretending not to be looking at the hot girls that just entered the restaurant, he puts every cell in my body on high alert. For self-preservation though, I need to tell myself that I don’t care about him and that I am here for the sole reason that for the first time in as long as I can remember, I am happy.

I
can’t shake
how impressed I am with Aria and the choices she has made for herself. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not looking to make her my girlfriend or anything. I am perfectly happy with my life. But that doesn’t change how amazing she is. I love that she is hell bent on blazing her own trail and not relying on the privilege she was born into.

There is also the matter of how strongly my body responds to her. Even when she is halfway across the room and I’m dancing for a crowd of excited women, I want her. But Aria and I aren’t going to hook-up. She is too inexperienced and for lack of a better word, virginal, for me to take advantage of. Additionally, and this is not something I’m familiar with, but I’m not sure she is buying what I’m selling.

I decide to spend the day working on a new routine. After what happened last night, getting distracted by Aria and dropping the ball on stage, I really need to bring my A-game. Or better yet, I need to take my show to an entirely new level of eroticism and physicality.

I scroll through my song list on my computer and decide to go with something more rock n’ roll than I normally choose. Hip-hop and R&B is what everyone choreographs their routines to at the club. I want to design a show around a classic rock piece. The kind of song everyone knows the words to and that elicits fond memories.

I decide on Foreigner’s “Feels like the First Time.” It’s not original, given it was in the movie about male strippers. I am Ryan Temptation after all. And I am going to make it feel like the first time for all the ladies in the house.

Since I’m going with classic rock, I decide on a hard look and pull out some black leather pants and a vest.

A once-over in the mirror tells me that I definitely need to make a stop at the tanning salon before heading to the club tonight. The whole spray-on-tan thing is not my favorite, but after a long winter in New York, it’s a necessity. It’s always good to be bronzed, and it helps define my muscles beyond their normal look.

I want to incorporate a lot of floor work in for tonight. I roll the leather vest down my arms and off my back and bend my torso back as I pull it off. It’s like doing the limbo and it requires a lot of muscle control, but it looks hot on stage. I thrust my pelvis towards the imaginary audience, teasing them into screaming for more. I flip over into a push-up stance with my legs wide apart. I keep my movements slow and languid, stretching out the forward thrusts with my body hovering over the floor.

My mind wanders to Aria and I picture her beneath me. Her hair spread in a halo behind her, eyes closed, and lips parted. I want her so badly that just the image of her causes my cock to stiffen, and I can almost feel her beneath me, matching my rhythm.

A loud knock at the door pulls me out of the zone. I roll onto my back and wipe the sweat off with a towel. That woman has put some kind of spell on me. I can’t believe just thinking about her has me hard and needing release. I may have to rub one out before going to work tonight. I really don’t need a repeat of what just happened occurring on stage. Especially if Aria will be there working.

Whoever is at the door knocks again, but it is harder and with more urgency. The music is loud, maybe too loud. It is probably a neighbor or the super. I don’t bother putting my flannel back on but answer the door in my muscle tee.

Two men in suits are on the other side of the door. I am thrown off balance by the unexpectedness of them.

“Ryan Trent?” the taller one asks.

They don’t look threatening and their suits look inexpensive and ill-tailored; I suspect that they are government employees. I try to think of anything I should be worried about but nothing comes to mind.

“Yes, I’m Ryan. What do you want?”

“I’m afraid we have something rather unfortunate to discuss with you, son.”

The shorter one cuts in. “Mr. Trent, would it be alright with you if we came inside to talk?”

I consider saying no, that whatever they have to say they can do from the hall. But what would be the point? Besides, I would much rather receive bad news in the privacy of my own living room as opposed to the hallway, where the neighbors could overhear.

I open the door wider to give my consent and they follow me inside. I pour myself a glass of water and then collapse into my black leather armchair. I don’t offer them water but I do tell them to have a seat.

“I am Gary Little,” says the smaller one. The taller one introduces himself as Todd Feeney.

“We are associates at McBride and Smith.”

That I have no idea who they are must be clear to them because they continue without waiting for a response.

“Martha and Randall Trent, they are your parents, correct?” They look to me for confirmation.

A heaviness settles in my chest and I nod silently.

“Your parents procured our services for the drafting of their wills some years ago. We would have informed you sooner, but we have had some trouble tracking you down. There was an accident, a fire, nine days ago. Your parent’s trailer, it burned to the ground. The fire … it happened with both of your parents inside.”

The heaviness that had settled onto my chest turned into a cannon ball. The oxygen leaves the room and my ears are ringing. My parents and I were not what I would ever describe as close. But whatever problems we had, they were still my parents. And other than Theresa and Mickey, they were the only people I had in the world.

The two suits look at each other, unsure of what to say next. I don’t think they have anything prepared beyond telling me that I’m now an orphan.

“Mr. Trent?” short and paunchy finally says. “Are you alright? I know this is sudden and unexpected.”

“It’s fine, I’m fine. What do you need me to do? Are there papers you need me to sign?”

“Um yes, there are papers,” says Feeney.

He unzips a messenger bag and hands me a stack of files.

“In addition to reading over the papers and moving forward with the estate,” says short and paunchy, “you need to,” he pauses and clears his throat. “You need to decide what to do about their remains. They are currently at the coroner’s office in Boston. They don’t hold the remains for long. I need to be clear on this, because it took us some time to track you down.”

“So you have until next Monday to decide,” cuts in Feeney, shooting a scowl at his tactless cohort.

“We know this is a lot to take in,” he says with no expression whatsoever.

“Yes, it is unexpected. You are saying I only have a few days to read this over,” I gesture towards the papers that are now lying on the coffee table.

“And I have what?” I count out on my fingers from today until Monday. “Five days until the city disposes of their remains?”

Both lawyers look horrified. It is obvious that they want to be absolutely anywhere but here in my living room, delivering what they must believe to be devastating news. I decide to cut them some slack. It’s not their fault that my parents were somewhat lacking in the whole unconditional, we will support you no matter what, part of being a father and a mother.

“I appreciate you taking the time to find me and personally deliver the news. I have a few days. Let me look everything over and I will be in touch.”

I stand up to let them know that their visit is over and I’m done talking to them. They respond accordingly and file towards the door.

I can’t imagine how I would have felt if I found out almost a year from now when I make my annual call to my mother on her birthday. I can hear the ladies buzzing about it in the trailer park. “It took 10 months before that black sheep of a son even realized his parents were dead.”

The lawyers are gone and I am left alone with Foreigner playing on repeat and a sheath of papers I have no idea what to do with.

I am devastated at the sudden realization that I am an orphan. I remember my mother telling me when I was only six how she felt when her mother died. It doesn’t matter that I haven’t spoken to them in months; all at once, I miss them.

I pick up the stack of papers and don’t know where to start. I guess page one is as good a place as any.

I skim the pages and they mean nothing to me. The words start to blur together and I feel like I’m back in high school. It’s not as though my life’s ambition was to be a stripper. I am here in this world of erotic dancing because school was so difficult for me. I was never able to follow what the teacher was saying in class and homework was an absolute joke.

I have tried to avoid reading anything that wasn’t for pleasure, rather than work, since leaving school, and I had planned on keeping it that way. But with the stack of papers in front of me, I realize that no matter your plans, things come as they will and you have to deal with them. And I will deal with them. I just have to figure out how. I can’t read the papers that they left for me and I don’t know who to go to for help.

I may not understand what these papers say but I know enough that I need to figure out what they mean.