CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Nicole stopped the hire-car on the side the road in front of the cottage. It was mid-afternoon and the sunshine sparkling on the bay brought back the bitter-sweet memories of her previous visit to Kettering over a month ago.
As expected the
For Sale
sign was gone, and a gold convertible Porsche sports car was parked in the driveway. Relieved to see he was home, Nicole switched off the engine, sticking the key into the pocket of her jeans.
For a moment she merely sat there staring at the cottage. The grass had been mown, and flowering plants flourished in terracotta pots on either side of the steps. There were even curtains on the windows. It was certainly starting to look lived in.
Nicole still found it hard to believe he’d actually gone and done it. She thought it merely been wishful thinking; abstract talk about a far away dream. She should have realised that Philip was someone who acted on his dreams.
The irony was, she had been offered the job she’d gone for on the day she was mugged, but Nicole was certain, no matter what happened today she wouldn’t return to Sydney in a hurry. There was nothing and no one to keep her there anymore. Her parents would only try to run her life. Trisha had Jim now, and Robert would be starting University in a few weeks. Neither did she feel safe there anymore, not when one was attacked in the middle of the day.
There had to be a job for her in Hobart. Earlier that morning she’d glanced tentatively through the positions vacant section of the paper, but circling a few ads was as far as she’d gone. Her mind had been too preoccupied with Philip.
Something caught her eye, and she turned away from the house to see the tall lean figure of a man walking along the edge of the road towards her. As he drew closer she saw it was Philip. Even though his strides were fast and purposeful, there was an aura of sadness about him, making her heart beat painfully in her chest. He also appeared to have lost weight. His cheeks were hollowed and his eyes shadowed.
Where had they gone wrong? Why were they now apart, each enclosed in their own private world of torment?
He walked right past the car without seeing her and up the path to the house. Nicole watched him unlock the front door and disappear inside.
Spurred into action, she got out of the car and followed him.
Moments later she stood on the veranda with her hand poised to knock on the door, realising for the first time that she had absolutely no idea what she was going to say to him.
Play it by ear, she told herself. Jenny had said he loved her, and Nicole loved him. That was all she had to tell him. Things would take care of themselves from there. Everything would turn out for the best the moment he saw who his visitor was.
She rapped her knuckles against the decorated stained-glass section of the door and waited. She heard his heavy tread on the floorboards, and a moment later saw his tall silhouette through the frosted window.
When he had the door open and saw who was standing on his doorstep, Philip’s expression turned from indifference, to shock, and then anger, all within the space of a heartbeat. Fury was the last emotion Nicole would have expected, and wondered what reason he could possibly have to be mad at her.
For a moment neither of them spoke, but Philip regained control first. If Nicole had been stunned by the fearsome look in his eyes, she was totally floored by his words.
“I can’t believe you have the gall to show up here after what you’ve done,” he said through tightly clenched teeth.
Nicole stared up at him in dismay. Too stunned to speak she shook her head mutely from side to side.
“But then that’s the way of your entire family, isn’t it? If it wasn’t enough to inflict the wound, you had to come and dig the knife in deeper. Well, you’re too late. I’d already made all the arrangements, and Frank knows everything about my past. I made sure of that before I started.”
“Wh- what are you talking about?” Nicole finally managed to ask in a tremulous voice.
“Don’t play the innocent with me you spoilt little bitch. I should have known that your sweetness and light was all a front. I should have followed my initial assumption that you’d bend under the pressure and do as Daddy says.”
“Please Philip. Whatever he’s done, I had no part in it,” she protested, but his dark scowl told her Peter Cameron had well and truly succeeded in driving a wedge between them.
“Didn’t you? Then how about telling me how he found out about Mario Palmiri...?”
“Not from me. I swear,” she gasped, shocked and horrified that her father had somehow discovered the truth and used it against Philip.
He leaned closer, his hard angry face only centimetres from her own. “If you didn’t tell him, then a little birdie must have, because you’re the only person I trusted enough to talk to about it. After what we shared, how could you turn on me like that?”
“I didn’t. Can’t we go inside to discuss this?”
He stretched back up to his full height, towering over her, making her feel small, vulnerable and alone.
“What’s there to discuss?” The harshness in his voice hit her like cold hard chips of ice, chilling her to the core.
“Why you never rang me once we got back to Sydney for one.”
“Oh but I did. I rang you over and over, left messages on your phone. I even went to your house, but I was threatened with an AVO, and told that you didn’t want to see me anymore.”
“Oh God!” she groaned, sharp spears of anger at her father’s underhanded vindictiveness tearing through her.
But Philip hadn’t finished. “At first I didn’t want to believe it, but when you made no effort to contact me I realized he had to be right. Now I’m telling you to get the hell out of my life.”
“No, Philip. Please listen to me? I did ring you, but for two weeks –
But he was already closing the door on her. “I know why you really came here, Nicole. You’re jealous that I got this house before you did. You think you can have everything - but you can’t. No one crosses me and gets away with it.
No one!”
“Philip!”
she cried again, but found herself facing the hard paneling of the door.
For a moment she just stood there, too shocked to move. Never in her worst imaginings had she thought Philip would turn on her like this. He hadn’t even been prepared to listen to her explanation, hurling vicious accusations at her instead. Had Jenny got it wrong? If he really had loved her, surely he would have at least stopped to hear her side of the story. Instead he’d banished her from his life. If he truly had cared about her he wouldn’t have listened to her father. He would have trusted her, believed in her.
But he had.
He’d trusted her enough to tell her about it in the first place. He could quite easily have kept that part to himself. How her father found out about it she had no idea. Being confronted with it like that must have really torn Philip apart. No wonder he’d slammed the door in her face. Somehow she had to make him see the truth. But the first thing she decided to do was tell her father exactly what she thought of him.
Gail answered the phone when she rang. She’d managed to calm down somewhat after the drive back to Hobart and the light supper she’d forced herself to eat in a coffee shop near her hotel.
“Where on earth are you, Nicole?” her mother asked anxiously. “We haven’t heard from you in days, and when I rang Trisha last night, she told me you’d gone interstate.”
“That’s right, but it’s Dad I want to talk to right now. Put him on please?”
“What is it, honey? What’s wrong?”
“Get Dad to tell you after I’ve finished,” she said coldly.
“Nicole! All right I’ll get him.”
A few moments later he spoke insistently into the receiver. “Where the hell are you?”
“Where do you think I am? Trying to salvage a relationship you ruined. How could you do such a thing!?” she demanded, all her pent up anger and frustration boiling to the surface.
“You haven’t gone running after that awful Spanish man, have you?”
“Got it in one, and if you think you’re going to stop me from seeing him, you’ve got another thing coming. I’m not returning to Sydney until I’ve repaired the damage you’ve caused.”
“For God’s sake! His father was a crook, a criminal. Why do you think Philip changed his surname?”
“And if you’d done your research properly, you would have found out he wasn’t his father, but his
step
-father, whom he helped put behind bars.”
“He told you that did he? I can’t believe you’d fall for such a pack of lies. I thought you had better sense than that. I want you to come back to Sydney first thing in the morning.”
“Stop ordering me around. I’m staying right where I am,” Nicole asserted vehemently.
“If you continue seeing that man I’ll -“
“You’ll what? Forcibly bring me back? Just try it.”
“No, I’ll disown you,” he said softly, dangerously.
“Looks like this is goodbye then, doesn’t it?” But her words sounded hollow even to her own ears. They were her parents and she would always love them, no matter what.
“Please see reason, Nicole. He’s all wrong for you.”
“Goodbye Dad,” she said sadly, slowly returning the receiver to its cradle. The tears were already there, flooding her eyes with pain and regret. She never thought it would come to this, that by loving a man she had to cut off her own family, a man who now hated her because of the lies of another.
Determined not to give up on him, Nicole went to Philip’s office the following day, after finding Davies and Turner Solicitors in the phone book, but the secretary told her he wouldn’t be back that afternoon. She asked her if she wanted to make an appointment. Nicole contemplated giving a false name to do it, but decided to try again the next day.
The next time he was in, but Nicole was informed it would be at least an hour before he had an opening in his schedule. She sat down to wait, anxiously flicking through one magazine after another without reading a single word. By the time the door to his office opened, it was closer to two hours.
Nicole sat silent and apprehensive as he came towards her. She saw his expression darkening with repressed anger, but on noticing his secretary at her desk watching them, he motioned for Nicole to precede him into his office.
Telling her to take a seat, he settled himself in the chair behind his desk. Nicole chanced another glance at his face, but now there was no hint whatsoever of what he was thinking. He had schooled his strong-boned features into an impassive mask of indifference.
“O.K. so now that you’ve gotten yourself in here, you have exactly five minutes to tell me what’s on your mind,” he said curtly.
“Oh Philip, I can’t understand why you want to believe him. I don’t really know how he found out about your stepfather, but I swear it wasn’t through me. I thought you were immune to his threats. You told me yourself if someone ordered you to do one thing, you’d do the exact opposite...”
“Three minutes.”
“Are you listening to me?”
“Of course. Want me to repeat it? But if you have any more to say, it would only be cutting into your precious time,” he said sarcastically.
“Damn it Philip! I thought you cared about me. Jenny led me to believe you did.”
“Oh yes, Jenny, the last of the true romantics. The point remains, someone told your father about Mario Palmiri - and it sure as hell wasn’t me.”
All of a sudden she couldn’t take it anymore. Her control slipped, and she cried out in indignation, jumping abruptly to her feet. This sudden action caused something to twinge around her middle. Having forgotten all about her healing ribs, Nicole clasped her side, gasping from the sudden jab of pain.
“What is it?” Philip asked, also getting to his feet.
She looked back up at him, and saw a flash of concern soften his face. Now he shows he cares, she thought dejectedly.
But it was too little too late.
Philip would never love her the way she loved him. She could see that now. If he felt the depth of emotion she felt for him, he would never have listened to her father in the first place. He would have trusted her, believed in her.
“If you’d really cared, you would have sought to find out. You could have rung someone else. Trisha left a forwarding address. Jim could have told you. Instead you believed the lies my father was sprouting... I suppose my five minutes is up now, so I guess I’d better go.”
She knew she was taking a big risk walking out like this, but she did it with as much dignity as her tender ribs allowed. Stopping at the door, she chanced a glance back at him. He was still standing there, doubt and uncertainty crossing his face. But he made no move to stop her from leaving.
Nicole turned away, letting the door close behind her. She stood hesitating in the hall. Don’t let it end like this? She pleaded silently.