the scents of jasmine from the garden and of the sea
beyond the walls of the city. "Mamacita has a ring with a
jewel in it," he went on. "A ruby. She wears it around her
neck because it was not safe to wear jewels where we
lived. I pray she still has it," he added.
"I was referring to your character, not your birthright,"
she said now, as she had said then, and turned around to
face the thing she feared. "Hello, Diego," she said, and
slapped the Honorable James Marbury in the face with all
the strength that was in her.
She did not wait for his or anyone else's reaction.
She picked up her heavy skirts and ran toward a side door
and out of the room.
"Get out."
The gaggle of females gathered around a cozy fire in
her suite's sitting room turned toward her as one. Honoria
couldn't make out their faces, between weak eyes and a
flood of tears, but their united gasp was loud on the air.
She pointed at an exit. Her maid, her maid's assistant, her
secretary, her hairdresser, and her mistress of the
wardrobe were wise enough to scatter, at least after
Huseby rounded them up with a look. Huseby had
survived twenty years of being Honoria's personal servant
by knowing when to fight and when to flee Honoria's
temper.
Once they were gone, Honoria barricaded every
entrance to her apartments with the heaviest furniture she
could manage to drag in front of the doors. If she'd had a
weapon available, she would have taken it in hand. Her
father soon stormed along to demand an explanation, but
the most he could do was bang on the hall door while
Honoria buried her head under a pillow and ignored the
racket. His rage soon turned to worried parental
imploring about her well-being. Eventually he called out
that they'd speak in the morning, and went away.
After her fit of hysterics had passed, Honoria felt
weary but much calmer. She had to have been mistaken
about his being Diego, of course. And now the gossip
would already be flying, when all she'd wanted was to
avoid any breath of scandal.
She supposed the one good that would come of it
was that now no one would think to offer for her hand in
marriage. She even managed to smile a little at the
thought. Father would be disappointed and hurt, but the
damage was done. She couldn't go back and undo it; she
could only wait for morning before offering him her
apologies and begging to be allowed to return to the
country.
Once the emotional storm was past, she wished she
could fall into a dead sleep, not to wake for at least
twenty years. But sleep, like every other form of peace,
eluded her. So she rose from her ornate gilded bed and
proceeded literally to rip off the green pastel satin gown
she'd looked ridiculous in.
"It's not as if I could ever do anything right." she
muttered, once she was standing in a puddle of sea foam-
colored rags. She did not find reminders of the sea
pleasant, so she kicked the remains of the dress aside and
went to work on unlacing and tugging off her corset and
chemise. Then she wearily dragged herself off to discover
where her nightgowns were kept.
The problem with being pampered and provided for
by an army of servants, Honoria concluded, after a search
of the dressing room finally yielded up a drawer full of
embroidered linen nightgowns, was that she really had far
less control over her life than she thought. If there was
one thing she hated, it was lack of control. If she wanted a
cup of tea, for example, she had but to order it and it
would be brought in a china cup on a silver tray. But how
to make tea, or what merchant provided it, or even where
the kitchen of this house was located, she hadn't a clue.
"Now, I ask you," she murmured, as she walked
back into the bedroom, "what kind of control is that?"
For all her wealth she had no independence, no true
freedom. Her servants had more dominion over her life,
at least here in London, than she did. Her life was as
narrow and proscribed as that of any harem woman
locked away in the bagnios of the east, not that she knew
all that much about the indolent, luxurious life of a harem
girl. Oh, no, not Honoria Pyne.
I do, however, know how to brew a fine cup of
Turkish coffee
. It was one of several lessons she'd learned
in how to please a man, she recalled bitterly, as she
claimed her spectacles from the damascene coffer on her
writing table. Once she had them perched on her nose she
could see clearly again, though her jaded view of the
world remained as dark as ever. Honoria absently ran her
fingers over the top of the desk while her thoughts drifted
in odd unconnected circles.
Coffee making was one of her few domestic
accomplishments, she thought, remembering the dark
color of the beans, the deep aroma of the steaming brew,
the thick, grainy taste of the sweetened liquid on her
tongue. Not that she had done it in years, for questions
would be asked as to how she'd come to have the skill.
She had not tasted Turkish coffee, either, for fear the very
taste would set off all the wildness that would destroy
her. She drank tea; led a quiet, controlled, proper life; and
kept all her secret desires to herself.
Honoria did not embroider through her quiet days at
the family's country estate; neither did she garden. Nor
did she practice music or drawing. Ladylike pursuits had
always eluded her interest, though she'd been provided
with the finest teachers in the world. Books were the only
true love in her life, a skill in reading languages her only
natural talent. Other than a sizable inheritance, she'd
never possessed any of the artifices or skills likely to
attract the attentions of a suitor.
Yet she'd believed in the devoted love of one man,
once. Oh, yes, she had…
Honoria tried to divert her thoughts from going
down yet another rocky, thorny road. It didn't help that
when she grasped the stack of correspondence off the
desk to divert her thoughts that the envelope on top was
written in a familiar hand. It held the signature of Captain
Derrick Russell.
She flung the letters from her and grasped her hands
nervously before her.
"Oh, God, Derrick!"
Her fiancé patted her shoulder and said in a
distracted way, "There, there. Buck up." His steely glance
turned out to sea as the shore of Majorca receded in the
distance. Honoria wiped a tear away and held down the
black skirts of her dress against the assault of the wind.
News of her mother's death had come with the docking of
one of her father's merchant ships, the
Manticore,
and
they were now on board the same ship, returning to
England as swiftly as possible
.
"It's wonderful of you to leave your own ship to
travel with me," she told the Navy captain who now stood
with her on the deck of the merchant ship. He looked
restless, and she didn't blame him. His own vessel had
taken damage in a fight with a band of ragtag Barbary
pirates and put in to Majorca for repairs. She knew he
was anxious to return to fighting in the joint effort with
the French navy to finally rid the Mediterranean of the
outlaws who had plagued these waters for centuries.
Derrick had earned the title of Scourge of Algiers from
his enemies. She was so proud of him.
Honoria watched him with open admiration from
beneath the wide rim of her black bonnet, her eyes
shining as much with devotion for him as with tears at
her loss. She could only pray that her mother would
understand the mix of grief and love that filled her right
now. She had accepted Derrick's proposal only two days
before. Her joy had seemed so complete, before the
Manticore
had arrived with the awful news of her
mother's untimely death
.
Before she had left England, Derrick had asked her
to marry him in a letter posted from Naples, and had
asked her to meet him. Father had told her that since her
happiness meant everything to him, he would give his
consent to the match. So she'd left to visit relations on
Majorca, in the hope that she would be able to spend time
with the Naval hero when his ship put into port on the
Mediterranean island. Her mother had already been ill,
and Honoria wished now that she'd stayed home to help
nurse her. Regrets gnawed at her, but Derrick's presence
was a steadfast comfort. She knew her father would be
pleased that Derrick was accompanying her back to
England, even if her servants and the ship's crew might
not be considered appropriate chaperones by the highest
of sticklers. What did it matter? They were to be married,
after all.
Father had spoken of reservations about the young
man's suit, and had said that his permission for the match
with a mere Naval captain was given reluctantly. But
Honoria knew the duke's hesitation had nothing to do
with any fault her father found in Derrick Russell.
Derrick was perfect. He was solicitous, kind, brave,
chivalrous, and thoughtful. He loved her for herself, and
not the estate to which she was heir. Honoria knew that
the Duke of Pyneham was merely concerned that his heir
make the best match possible for the continuation of the
family name and fortune. Derrick's father was but a
baronet, and Derrick was not even the baronet's eldest
son. His prospects were tied to his Naval career
,
not that
Honoria cared a fig about that. It was Derrick she
adored, since the moment their gazes met at her very first
ball. In his dashing uniform he had glittered like a bright
jewel among a flock of crows. His gold head stood out in
the crowd, as did the healthy glow of skin kissed by the
wind and sun of the Mediterranean. She did not feel so
overgrown next to the tall, slender man. She'd danced her
first waltz with Derrick, and prayed that she would dance
her last one with him, as well. She prayed she would be
as good a wife to him as her mother had been to her
father
.
"I so want to make you a good wife," she told him
now. "To be with you wherever in the world you happen
to sail."
Derrick patted her hand and graced her with his
wise smile. "Darling, where I'll need you to be is safe and
sound at home. I need you there protecting my interests
—
our interests, my darling." He touched her uptilted nose
.
She found it hard to see his dear face through her
tears. Derrick had taken off her spectacles when they
came aboard the
Manticore,
reminding her that wearing
them in public was unladylike and unbecoming. His
advice was always for the best. She vowed to follow it
always.
"We will make a wonderful team, Derrick. I know it
."
"Indeed, my dear little wife-to-be. Where I lead, you
will follow, and all will be well."
Honoria now put her hand on her stomach as a wave
of nausea shuddered through her. "Fool." The word was a
low, dangerous snarl, though she wasn't sure who her fury
was aimed at. What a sick, naive, besotted thing she had
been. "And Derrick wasn't even the worst of it."
How dared they reappear—both of them in one
night! Why the devil didn't her ghosts have the decency to
stay in their much-deserved crypts? If she could live in
limbo, why couldn't they?
How dared they
?
She shook her head and looked about her, trying to