On Tenterhooks (28 page)

“Jack, these people came a long way to talk
about Zack and
Abby
and
some kind of chain letter or something?”

“I see,” said Jack, voice low.

“No, not exactly a chain letter,” Steve answered. “I think maybe I’d better back up a little bit, if you don’t mind?”

“
Please
,
”
answered Jack.

“First of all, I’d like to
thank you for inviting us in
,” began Steve. “I know you don’t know us from Adam
.
In fact, a few days ago, the three of
us
didn’t even know each other,
s
o, I’ll ask you to bear with us if this story sounds a little bizarre.”

“Of course, Mr. Connor, a
nd you must also understand that
if your visit here today
upset
s
my wife
or
daughter
in any way
, I reserve the right to throw you out of here if
or
when I see the need.”

“Daddy!
I am
not
upset! I
—!”

“Abby!” said Susan, grabbing Abby’s arm. “
L
et your father lead this discussion!”

“But it’s no
t a discussion!
They just got here
,
and already you’re trying to run them out!”

Jack closed his eyes and shook his head
.
When he
opened his eyes
, he
smiled
tentatively
at Steve
and
breathed a large, cleansing breath.

“Please understand,
Mr. Connor,
my
family has been through a lot this year
.
It has affected each of us deeply.
Clearly, my daughter wants you here, for reasons I assume you will be explaining
to us
soon. But
let me be perfectly clear with you. I
f any of
you
do anything that turns this from a polite conversation into a confrontation, I will remove you bodily from this house, regardless of any protest from my daughter
.
Are we clear?” he looked at each of them as they nodded
.

He turned to Abby.

“Are we clear?”

She flung herself back against the couch cushions. “Fine,” she mumbled
,
as she chewed on her lower lip
.

“Good.
Now, let’s continue
please.”

“I ass
ure you
,
Mr. Nikko,” said Steve, “w
e mean no disrespect to your family or your loss
.
You will not have to toss us out. I would just like the opportunity to explain
our situation
, even if the story sounds a little far-fetched
.
But
,
believe me, we do not want any trouble.”

“Excellent.
Then we are already in ag
reement on at least one thing
,”
Jack
smiled.

Abby sighed loudly from the couch. Steve decided to charge ahead.

“Back in February, my wife
was killed in a car accident.
It has been
. . .
difficult
. . .
for me to adjust to losing her
.
Well,
to be honest with you
, it has been a tremendous struggle for me to get out of bed in the morning
.
We were deeply in love
,
and I had crafted my world around her and us.
Until the moment I got
a
phone call
tell
ing
me she was dead
, it had never even crossed my mind that we would ever be separated, by anything.”

Steve paused
.
He was struggling
.
Should he let them see how much it hurt? Could he even control it if he kept talking? The Nikkos were rapt
.
Martin and
Veronica
had not heard him talk with this much rawness about Julie, so they also paid very close attention.
He continued.

“Anyway, after she was gone,
I basically became a shut-in. I was off from work for
nearly
five
weeks
.
I stayed in the house, but it was torture
.
Everywhere I looked, she was still there. Every simple thing in my house bec
ame a memory. I
was .
.
. lost
.”

He fought the tears. He chuckled.

“
One night, I wandered into our closet.
I took al
l her clothes off the hangers.
I was gonna throw them all out. I dunno
,
I guess I was thinking
that’d make it better somehow
.
I couldn’t do it
.
Instead, I made a big pile of them on the floor and sat there, smelling them because they still smelled like her perfume and her shampoo.
”

Steve removed his glasses and wiped his eyes
.
“
I fell asleep there. I fel
l aslee
p
sniffing a heap of clothes.
”

He felt the heat in his face
.
Veronica
slid closer and put her arm around him.
Abby wept
,
and Susan
’s
faced softened as Steve
related his pain.

“Shhh,” said
Veronica
soothingly
.
“Stop Steve, you don’t have to do this.”

“Yeah
.
Why don’t you
take over
for a minute
and
let me catch
my breath
, okay?”

“Sure,” said Martin. “I can relate to Steve’s story in many ways
.
Several weeks
ago,
I lost my
only child, my daughter
,
Maggie
.
She was the light of our world. She was in college
,
and my ex-wife and I could not have been more proud of her and her accomplishments.
Ever since my wife and I separated,
Maggie
had been
the true center of my universe
.
I suppose I may have doted on her and spoiled her a bit, like any self-respecting father would do
. . .
”

Martin looked at Jack, who gave him a slight smile
and
a
nod
.

“I tried to get away from the pharmacy on weekends and
spend time with her.
We’d
go to dinner or the movies o
r
the home football games together
.
I did my best to get out of there in the early ev
enings, so as not to cramp her ‘
yo
ung adult’
lifestyle
.
She had dozens of friends calling and texting, a pile of standing party invitations and enough classwork to kill a bull moose
.
But
,
she always made time for Dad
.
That was her style
—
subtle but always thoughtful.
Then
one Sunday morning, her roommate found her on her bed
.
She had overdosed
. . .
on sleeping pills
.
No warning signs, no cries for help
.
Just
poof
. . .
and she was gone
. . .
”

Martin looked at each of the Nikkos
,
in turn.

“And now, well
. . .
here I am
.
Not sure where
we are
going exactly, and not sure what we’ll find when we get there
.
But for the first time in weeks, I don’t feel like I’m wanderin
’
in the wilderness.”

Martin heaved a sigh and looked at
Veronica
.

“And I lost my mother,” said
Veronica
, taking her cue. “
She and I were distant
for many years
before she died
.
She was SCUBA diving
when she died
.
She
had a heart attack
.
Diving was
something I didn’t even know she knew
how to do, or even wanted to
try
. And I’m
an
avid diver.
I keep thinking she was maybe doing it to try to get close to me again
. . .
like we were when I was a kid
.
But I don’t know for sure
.
I guess I never will, huh?
”

Abby was nodding, tears in her eyes.

“
Death is pretty final that way
,”
Veronica
continued. “N
o chance of reconciliation, just a lot of questions. I tried to tell myself
that
the questions were gonna have to go away on thei
r own. B
ut, they’re still
here
with me
.
I can tone them down from time to time, but
they haven’t gone away
. They’ve
just quieted down a bit.
Her death has made me reexamine a lot about my own life and what I want to do with it.”

She ended it there. Jack was leaning forward in his seat, chin in his hand
.
He looked at each of them appraisingly.

“Guys,
I believe you. I understand where you
are
.
Believe me, I can relate
.
But
I don’t get it.
Abby said that you were from out of town
.
I am guessing they have support groups wherever you’re from
.
Why did you come here?”

“I am from Charlotte, and
yes,
I
do
have support groups
at home
,” Steve said
.
“But that’s not why we came
to see you
.
”
He
pulled the familiar letter out of his back pocket.
“About a week ago, I finally went back to work. As I was going through all the mail I got while I was out, I found this note
.”

He stood and handed it across the coffee table to Jack.
While
Jack
read,
Steve
focused
his conversation
on Abby and Susan.
 
“It’s like an ad
vertisement,
f
or this
website
called
Say Goodbye to Me
. It’s
a
place where you can send a final letter to a loved one who has died
.
Or at least that’s what the note says.
I chalked it up to some weird internet scam, and
figured
the timing of it
s
landing on my desk was just coincidence.”