Read One Foot in the Grave Online
Authors: Jeaniene Frost
Ian weighed his decision silently for a minute. There was a hushed expectancy. I tensed when he took a knife from his pants and made his way through the guests to Bones.
He looked at the knife, at Bones, and then flipped it until the blade was facing inward instead of pointing out.
“Go then, and be Master of your own line, subject to none but yourself and the laws which govern all of Cain’s children. I release you.”
Then he handed the knife to Bones, who accepted it respectfully.
“You all bear witness,” Bones called out, to various audible acknowledgments.
Wow, that was short and sweet. I’d expected something more bloody or ceremonial.
Ian let out a resigned noise. “We’ve been together a long time, Crispin. It will feel odd not having you as one of my people. What are your plans?”
“The same as any new Master of a line, I suspect,” Bones said lightly, though his expression hardened. “I’ll protect those who belong to me at all costs.”
I knew what he meant by that, even if his deeper meaning flew by Ian.
“You’re under no more obligation to stay; will you be leaving, then? Or will you wait to see if your former protégée wins her challenge?”
Bones smiled, and his eyes flicked to me. “Wouldn’t miss this part, mate. I wager she wins, unless she’s forgotten everything I taught her.”
“I rather doubt that,” Ian responded dryly.
“What are the rules for this fight?” I questioned. “Are you judging the winner by who’s first to be pinned and helpless?”
Ian returned to his couch and settled comfortably on it. “No, poppet, this isn’t a wrestling match. You’ll only win back your man if you kill your opponent. Now, your opponent doesn’t have the option of killing you, however. But he can deliver you to me in any state, and once he does, then you’re mine.”
I absorbed that information. With that, I let my own light loose from my eyes. Their glow pierced the air like twin emerald lasers, causing a multitude of voices to speak at once. Ian had told them what I was, but seeing was believing.
“Bring on your best, Ian. I’m ready.”
He smiled. “Don’t you want to have your former lover wish you luck first?” And he pointed at the ceiling above me.
I looked up—and stared. Son of a
bitch.
Suspended in a cage at the top of the domed ceiling was Noah. Talk about a bird’s-eye view. He was even tilted at an angle for perfect scrutiny. What a shitty position to be in, watching your fate played out below you while you were helpless to do anything about it.
The green shine from my gaze fell on Noah’s face, who was looking down at me with horror. It was the expression I always knew he’d wear if he found out what I was. Sometimes it truly sucked to be right.
“Grendel,” Ian called out. “How would you like to deliver this half-breed to me?”
There was a laugh from the other side of the room. A bald man stood and gave a slow, appreciative whistle.
“I’ll bring her to you, Ian. It will be my pleasure to break her.”
I looked my challenger up and down.
Uh oh. This
might be a problem.
F
OR ONE, THE MAN STANDING HAD TO BE
almost seven feet tall. His arms were thicker than my waist, and he had legs like tree trunks covered in skin. For someone his size, he moved down the aisle with a light, quick grace that gave me a sinking feeling in my stomach. Massive and fast; that wasn’t good. But what had me the most concerned was that the man now jumping into the arena wasn’t a vampire. He was a ghoul.
I could kick my silver heels through his heart until the cows came home, but it wouldn’t kill him. Neither would these heels suitably double as a sword to cleave his head off. Alrighty, then. This would be interesting.
Ian grinned at me with expectant victory. “Do you know who that is, Cat? That’s Grendel, the most famous mercenary of the ghouls. He’s almost six hundred years old and a former
stradioti
of the Venetian armies. Grendel used to be paid according to the num
ber of heads he lopped off in battle, and that, my dear poppet, was just when he was human.”
I caught Bones’s eye. He raised a brow.
Did I want him to intervene?
he was asking silently. He could stop all this by pulling the property card, I knew, and Bones’s expression told me that Ian wasn’t exaggerating a bit in his description of what a badass Grendel was.
I gave the smooth-skulled ghoul another thorough evaluation. Yeah, he looked like a mean motherfucker, no doubt about it. And here I was armed with only a pair of high heels. I glanced up at Noah, who had a resigned expression on his face. Clearly he thought he was a dead man no matter what happened. I could take the easy way out. Call myself Bones’s Bite Bitch and walk away with nary a broken fingernail to show for it, but that wasn’t my style. No, I’d rather fight this giant and
win
my freedom than get it handed to me by default. But where was a cannon when I needed one?
“Don’t bash her about too badly, Grendel; I have plans for her later.” Ian smirked.
The ghoul gave an ominous laugh. “She’ll be alive. Anything else is up to you to heal.”
How comforting. I shook my head ever so slightly at Bones, indicating I didn’t want him to intercede. Then I cracked my knuckles with a hint of grimness, watching as Grendel approached. The ghoul looked me over with a professional, callous scrutiny, no doubt deciding which of my bones to break first.
“To show that I have no fear,” he said in his deep voice. “I’ll let you strike the first blow without defending myself.”
“I’m not giving you the same thing,” I responded instantly.
A cold smile wreathed his face. “I would hope not. Then this would end too soon and spoil my fun.”
Nice. Grendel the Giant was a sadist. Who said anything in life was easy?
I took a deep breath—and then leapt in the air toward him, kicking my feet out with all my strength. My heels landed in his throat and I scissored outward, hoping to sever the spinal column in his neck.
But it didn’t. What it did do was tear off two big chunks of his neck and leave me straddling him as we both fell back from the impact. I landed with my knees very indecently around his face, and then I jumped back.
Ian laughed so hard, his eyes turned pink from tears. “You didn’t use
that
battle tactic with me before, Cat. I daresay I feel cheated.”
Grendel wasn’t in as jolly a mood. He got to his feet, rubbed his throat where the skin was healing back into place, and gave me a very unpleasant look.
“You will pay with pain for that.”
What was I supposed to say? It wasn’t good for me, either?
Grendel’s fist shot out. It was almost comical, because I only saw a blur and then
boom
! I flew into the stands behind me. Landed on two well-dressed female vampires who helpfully threw me back into the arena without even a how-do-you-do. As soon as I hit the ground, I rolled, narrowly avoiding a kick that would have landed my intestines into my chest cavity. Then I jumped up to prevent him from crashing down onto
me like a WWE wrestler. Fuck me, he was fast! And he wasn’t fooling around! Another leap made his balled fist land on my shoulder instead of my ribs. There was a crack as my collarbone broke. Another crack as he feinted left and followed through with an underhanded right, smashing three of my ribs at least. I darted away, gasping, to be hit in the back when I wasn’t fast enough. Face-first I sprawled onto the arena floor, scrambling, my heart sinking as I felt an iron fist close over my ankle.
Grendel yanked me closer and drove his fist into my side. I pulled back at the last second, so he didn’t take out my entire right rib cage, but he blasted my kidney. I doubled over, coughing up blood in a crimson ribbon, barely able to even breathe. Grendel let go of my ankle. He got to his feet and began to laugh.
“This was the feared Red Reaper?
This?
”
There was an outbreak of applause. I wasn’t the crowd favorite, obviously. Grendel took a bow, still laughing, while a cold rage erupted in me. This fucker was
not
going to hand me over to Ian while chuckling at how easy it had been. I would take him down, pain or no pain.
Come on, Cat. You’re not done yet.
“Pussy.”
I said it while pushing myself into a half-crouched position. Grendel stopped laughing at once. He loomed over me, drawing back his hand to clock me.
Instead of flinching away, I surged forward. My lower position put me in perfect range to do the most damage I could with my mouth.
Grendel let out a high screech. I didn’t bite anymore, because the main purpose was distraction, and there
was nothing like a chewed groin to get a guy’s full attention focused on that. When he instinctively shielded his crotch, I whipped around him to jump onto his back like a monkey, using my legs to hold on. Then I plunged my fingers into his eyes.
Grendel screamed in earnest at that. I shoved my fingers deeper, ignoring the disgusting squishy sensation. His arms flailed back as he tried to hit any part of me he could. I jumped off, missing those murderous blows, and swept his feet out from under him. Even though my fingers weren’t in his eyes anymore, he still couldn’t see. They hadn’t healed yet. I only had seconds.
I launched myself at him again, using the speed from that charge as leverage while I squeezed his head and yanked it around with everything I had. There was an audible break, but not enough. All my muscles bunched as I pulled with my last spurt of strength, using my legs to brace myself—and then I toppled backward with Grendel’s head in my lap, bloody eye sockets staring up at me.
“You forgot…to kick me…when I was down,” I managed to wheeze.
The instant of shocked silence was broken when several voices began to speak at once. I spat some blood out of my mouth, not caring how unladylike that looked, and cradled my aching side. Grendel would have had me if he hadn’t been so smug. One more blow like the last one to my side, and I wouldn’t have been able to twist the top off a soda bottle. Even now, I felt like I’d been in a car wreck. Make that a train wreck. A big one. Grendel’s face looked up at me, his skin beginning to wrinkle, and I shoved his skull away with
distaste. Some people liked to keep trophies. I wasn’t one of them.
Slowly I pushed myself to my feet and glared at Ian, who was still gaping.
“Lower…the cage…down.”
I still couldn’t speak right from the pressure of my broken ribs. Ian nodded, tight-lipped, and with a rasp of metal, Noah was brought to the floor. When he was let out of the cage, he looked at me and the headless ghoul with horror. Then he started to scream.
“Somebody shut him up,” Ian ordered, annoyed.
Spade stepped forward immediately, his piercing gaze and order for silence quieting Noah in seconds. Then he led him back up the aisle to the double doors where he’d been watching. I relaxed a tiny bit. It was as safe a place as any for Noah to be.
Ian, surprisingly, began to clap, but his clapping had more of a mocking sound to it than the genuine applause Grendel had briefly garnered.
“Well done, Red Reaper! No one could scoff at that name for you now. I’m more than impressed, as is everyone here. You’ve proven to be resourceful, strong, and ruthless. You’ve won your challenge and one of your men back. However…I still have three more of them. How much are their lives worth to you, poppet? Join me, swear your loyalty to me, and I’ll let them go. Come now, it won’t be that unpleasant. Indeed, there are many perks, as you’ll discover.”
Ian smiled when he said that last sentence, leaving me little doubt as to what he was talking about.
Bones stood. “I’ve seen enough, Ian. I’m leaving now.”
“But this is the best part,” Ian said, winking at me.
I held up my middle finger. He laughed. “Now you’re reading my mind, Cat.”
Bones made his way down the aisle. Over a hundred people also stood and began to follow suit. My eyes bugged. All of those were
his
?
“No need to stay any longer, mate. I bid you good night.” He got farther down until he was on the lowest level above the arena, and then he turned and grinned at Ian.
“But before I go, I think I’ll pay my respects to your guest of honor.”
Ian guffawed. “Be careful. You might end up alongside Grendel.”
“I always did like to live dangerously,” Bones replied, hopping down into the square space with me. Once there, his grin widened.
“Congratulations on a magnificent display of unsportsmanlike conduct. What a dirty fighter you are. Somebody
really
skilled must have trained you.”
I laughed even though it hurt. “Yeah. An arrogant bastard.”
“You know what they say about sticks and stones. Come now, pet, how’s about a kiss farewell for old time’s sake?”
“Want a kiss? Come and get it.”
I could see Ian just to the right behind Bones. He chuckled and muttered something to the person next to him about Bones’s high chance of getting his lips bitten off. That chuckle turned into a hiss of outrage when Bones took me in his arms and I slanted my mouth over his. I didn’t close my eyes as I kissed him, either. The look on Ian’s face was too priceless.
“What the hell—?”
Ian stood so abruptly, the couch overturned beneath him. I ignored that, sucking the deep gash on Bones’s tongue that he’d given himself in full view of everyone. It healed even as I started to feel better, his blood mending the damage within me.
Ian was livid at this change in the program. He shot Bones a glare sizzling with emerald rage.
“That’s enough, Crispin! Cat’s mine now, so you can remove your hands and get out.”
Bones tightened his grip on me instead. “I’m afraid I must disagree. I rather like my hands where they are.”
“Have you gone mad?” Ian jumped down into the arena. If he were human, he’d be having a heart attack. “What
is
this? You’d dare to antagonize me over a woman you barely tolerate? One you haven’t even seen in years? That’s hardly the behavior a new leader shows his people, unless there’s more to it than that? Is this some sort of excuse to start a war with me?”
Bones gave Ian a measured look. “I’m not trying to start a war with you, Ian, but if
you
start one, I’ll finish it. It’s very simple. I won’t let you force her into doing anything, but if she fancies you, I’ll walk away. So, luv, who would you rather be with? Me or Ian?”
“You,” I said at once, with a sly grin. “Ian, sorry, but you’re not my type. Plus kidnapping my friends to try and make me become your arm trophy?
Not
cool.”
An angry gleam flashed in Ian’s gaze, and when he smiled, it was dangerous.
“You remember slaughtering my friend Magnus, Cat? You’ve just decided that fate for one of your own friends.”
Then Ian pulled out a cell phone, continuing on as he dialed. “If you step away from Crispin right now, I might consider letting you persuade me to allow that person to live. But you’d better come up with a damn enticing offer, because I’m very brassed off. Otherwise, it’s the luck of the draw as to who my men execute.”
I heard the first ring coming from Ian’s cell. Then Tate’s voice answered.
“Hel
lo
,” he said cheerfully. “Francois’s phone.”
“Put Francois on the line,” Ian snapped.
“Hi there, buddy,” I called out loudly enough for Tate to hear me. “That’s Ian you’re talking to. Tell him the good news.”
Tate’s laugh flowed through the phone. “Oh hi, Ian. Francois can’t come to the phone right now. He’s tied up…with a silver stake in his chest.”
Ian snapped the phone closed, and his expression turned to pure, livid ice.
“You don’t have any of my men hostage, Ian,” I said cleanly. “But I have several of yours.”