Authors: Sofie Hartwell
An hour later, Mark and Melanie pick me up in Mark’s new car and we are off to Castro’s.
“Chris will be joining us at the restaurant,” Mark says.
“And he’s gonna feel like he’s hit the jackpot,” Mel adds. “I told him you were beautiful, but now he’ll see how drop dead gorgeous you are.”
“Did you also tell him that he may never see me again?”
“Give him a chance, Liv. He’s smart, handsome, and well-respected in the business community. He’s also a really nice guy,” Mark says.
“You two sound like his PR firm.”
“And you sound like an ungrateful bitch,” Mel retorts.
“Mel,” Mark warns her.
“It’s okay. I get it, Mel. And she’s right. You know, I’m gonna keep an open mind. Maybe I will like him.” I don’t really mean it, but when your friends go to so much trouble to make you happy, you should at least try to be thankful.
Mel smiles and Mark strokes her hand. Ahh, lovers… I envy them.
***
Chris Bachman is everything Mel and Mark said he would be. He’s extremely handsome with blonde hair and movie star looks. He is smart, charming, witty, and laid-back. He also has the kindest blue eyes. I feel myself relaxing and actively joining in the conversation.
Dinner was superb, and now I’m having the specialty of the house for dessert – creamy panna cotta infused with vanilla and served with a coulis of berries.
“I think I chose the wrong dessert,” Chris tells me laughingly as he points to his chocolate soufflé.
“Would you like to share mine?” I ask casually, noting that Mel and Mark are smiling widely as they prematurely congratulate themselves on their matchmaking skills.
“With pleasure,” he says as he spoons into my sweet concoction.
“Chris?” a familiar husky voice breaks up our cozy tete-a-tete.
We all look up. I’m sure I feel the color draining from my face, and Mark and Mel are frozen on the spot, not knowing what to say or do. Chris smiles as he puts down his spoon and gets up to greet him warmly.
“Tony, the man of the hour,” he says as he shakes Tony’s hand. “I think your assistant called my assistant this morning to set up a conference at HSBC next week.”
“Yes, she probably did.”
“Sorry, I’m here with friends – Mark, a real estate broker from Newport, Mel his lovely fiancée, and Olivia.” When he introduces me, he smiles sweetly, and I am touched, though I’m nervous that Tony will get the wrong idea.
Why do you care?
Tony shakes Mark’s hand, smiles at Mel, and barely nods in my direction. It’s as if I’m invisible and don’t even merit his acknowledgement.
“Are you here for business? Would you care to join our table?” Chris asks.
Tony points to a table ten feet away where two men are seated, and says, “I’m afraid I can’t. I’m with the Delgado brothers. Trying to persuade them to join our group of suppliers.” Then, to my dismay, he looks at me and asks, “You’ve met them, haven’t you?”
“I believe so,” I answer softly.
Chris has a look of puzzlement on his face.
“Do you two know each other?” he asks.
“Yes, we know each other very well,” he says insultingly. “I’ll be on my way, Chris. I’ll see you next week. It was nice meeting you all.” He leaves and I see him walking to his table.
Chris looks curiously at me. “How do you know him?” He stares intently at my face as he waits for me to respond.
I answer in the simplest way possible. “I once worked at Gallo’s.”
“For Tony?”
“Yes,” I answer briefly.
“So you were in finance then?” He’s trying to find a way to get more information, but I refuse to be forthcoming.
“I was.” I glance at Melanie to enlist her help, but she’s staring at the napkin on her lap. I’m afraid Mel and Mark are now the reluctant captive audience to my conversation with Chris.
“Economics major?” he tries a different tack.
I smile a little. “Psychic?”
He visibly relaxes. “Finance people are usually from either Business or Economics. Once in a while, we do get Psychology graduates. But they’re mainly for show. Don’t want to be accused of not giving everyone a fair chance,” he says with a wink.
“Why would a Psychology major even want to work at a bank?”
“Precisely. If you don’t want to deal with numbers, you’re working at the wrong place.” Chris says and we all laugh.
“What was it like working for Tony?” Just when I think I’m in the safe zone, he starts again, unable to let it go.
Can you blame him?
“Why do you ask?”
Please sense the tone.
“Fascinated with the man. He’s supposedly a whiz with numbers. Crunches them all quickly in his head and gives you an instant analysis,” he says to everyone at the table. Mark and Mel nod politely. I just want to hide under the table.
“Yes, he’s quite good,” I don’t say at what.
“Coffee, anyone?” Mark interrupts seamlessly.
We all order the latte and, when the server leaves, Mel tells an intriguing story about the company she works for. The moment has passed and Chris has finally let go of his twenty questions. Mark is now telling one of his hilarious jokes. I pretend to laugh and listen, but my mind is somewhere else.
I want to see his face again, even for just a few seconds.
No! You’ve come so far. He’s out of your life.
I don’t heed my inner voice. I turn slowly to look. While he talks, his gaze is fixed on me and I can’t turn away, even if I want to.
“Liv?” Chris calls my name.
“I’m sorry?” I imagine I look befuddled, and probably a little guilty.
“You don’t look very well,” he says with concern.
“I am a little queasy. Will you excuse me?”
“Would you like me to come with you?” Mel asks.
“No, just a little trip to the ladies’ room.”
The guys stand up as I leave and I scramble to find the restroom. Once inside, I lean on the lavatory, shaking uncontrollably. Thank God there’s no one else to witness my distress. Why did he have to be here?
I’m not over him. I’m not over him.
Coming here was a huge mistake.
I wet a paper towel from the dispenser and wipe my face with it. I have to go back or Mel will follow me here, so I take a very deep breath. I push the door open and see him standing there, waiting for me. He must have followed me when I stood up. A decorative partition wall hides us from everyone’s view.
“Why are you here?” I whisper.
“Isn’t it obvious?” he asks insolently.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“How long have you been with Chris?”
“That’s none of your business,” I say with hostility.
“One word from me and you’re out of his life.”
“Is that a warning?” I almost want to laugh.
“Yes.”
“I don’t care what you say, so go ahead. Talk to him.”
He looks like he wants to hurt me.
“You sound very confident,” he says. “Does he know about me?”
“Yes,” I’m not exactly lying to him.
“Everything?”
I don’t reply.
He smirks. “You’re lying. You never said anything to him or he wouldn’t have been so pleasant to me. I know I wouldn’t be so welcoming in his place.”
“Why are you doing this?” My voice is still soft, but more shrill now.
“Maybe because Chris is a friend and I’m rather concerned that he’s seeing you.”
“I see. You can’t have your dear friend associating with the likes of me.”
“You got it,” he says nonchalantly.
“Well, do what you have to do. I must go now.”
But as I leave, he puts his hand on my shoulder to stop me.
“What do you want from me?” I ask softly.
“You know what I want from you.” His voice is urgent.
“No, I don’t.”
“This,” he says as his mouth descends on mine. He suckles on my lips and then runs his tongue over them. It’s a devastating seduction I cannot resist, and I kiss him back with bittersweet fervor. His hands are all over me and I’m going limp from his touch. I make a strangled noise.
“Someone will see us,” I protest.
“I don’t care,” he says as he kisses my cheek, jaw, and neck.
“Please.” I become more aware of where we are.
“Please what?” he says.
“Not now. Not here,” I stutter. He slowly lifts his mouth and releases me.
“I’ll wait for you at the hotel,” he says. I neither nod nor shake my head. I’m too weak to respond. I just watch him confidently walk back to his table. After what seems like an interminable period of time, I walk slowly back to the table.
“Feeling better?” Mark asks.
“Yes, thank you. I’m so sorry. It must have been the fish. I ate too much,” I say with self-deprecation.
“Don’t be,” Chris says gallantly. “I’m a big meat-eater so I was quite happy with my steak. You should try that next time.”
“Next time?” I stupidly ask.
“Well, you may want to try other places,” he says with uncertainty.
“I had a lovely time, Chris,” I say to put his mind to rest.
“So did I,” he now says with a genuine smile on his face. “I hope we can go out again – that is, if you’re not busy or anything.”
I smile and touch his hand briefly. “Me too,” I say sincerely.
After saying good night, Chris walks over to give his ticket to the valet and Mark does the same thing. We get in our respective cars and drive away. The ride home is one of tension-filled silence.
Finally, Mel bursts out. “How dare that man ruin this night?”
“I don’t think he did it on purpose,” I say in his defense.
“How dare you come to his defense?” She turns her fury on me.
“Honey, it’s no one’s fault, and the night isn’t ruined,” Mark says.
“Men are so oblivious!” Mel says to me.
“What do you mean? Chris obviously liked Livie. And you liked him, too, right?” Mark asks as he looks at me in his back mirror.
“Yes, I like him very much,” I say honestly.
“There you go then,” Mark says, happy with my response.
“Mark, didn’t you observe anything at all?” Mel looks like she wants to scream at him.
“He never even said anything to Livie. What are you worried about?”
“He kissed you, didn’t he?” Mel asks with a tinge of sadness.
“How did you know?” Her question takes me by surprise.
“What?” Mark reacts with shock.
“I saw him follow you and, when you came back, your lips were swollen and red.”
“Oh,” is all I can say.
“What now, Livie?” she asks me as if she doesn’t want to know the answer.
“He wants me to meet him at the hotel.” I tell her the truth.
“And are you?”
Mark just silently listens to my conversation with Mel.
“I don’t know.”
“Don’t,” she says it softly. “You’ll get hurt again, and this time you won’t be able to pick up the pieces so easily.”
Tears well in my eyes and I reach for her hand. “It hurt so much to see him tonight. It’s pointless for me to deny what I feel.”
“Mark, let’s drive her to the Rembrandt.” He nods and makes a left at the next corner.
I openly weep now, my face buried in my hands. “Thank you,” I say to both of them, but they say nothing, misery etched strongly on their faces.
The curtains in his room are wide open. I look at the view of the star-filled sky and wonder how life can be filled with so much beauty and pain. Tony stands behind me, his hands on my shoulders.
“Chris is a good man,” he says.
“Yes, he’s very nice,” I say.
“How long have you known him?”
“I just met him tonight,” I say with a rueful smile.
“Are you sorry then, that you didn’t meet him before?”
“No, what is meant to be is meant to be.”
“Meaning?”
“I could have met him in the past and it wouldn’t have mattered at all if the universe had planned something else for me.”
“So you believe in destiny?”
I turn around and look him in the eye. “I do.”
“Well, clearly, I was meant to be dining at that restaurant so we could meet again,” he says with his tight expression relaxing into a smile.
“So we’re here because of a chance meeting?”
“Yes and no. If I hadn’t seen you tonight, I assure you, we would have met again.”
I consider his reply, but don’t know what to make of it.
“Come sit with me,” he says as he himself sits down on the sofa. I sit right next to him. He reaches for the bottle of red wine next to him and expertly opens it with a corkscrew. He pours a little into two glasses and hands me one of them.
“Do you think this is wise?”
“Which one? Being with me or drinking wine?” he asks with a laugh.
“Both.”
“Half a glass of wine won’t hurt you, but…”
“Being with you might,” I finish his sentence.
“I was going to say that it might make you feel more receptive to what I have to say.”
“Which is?”
He puts down his glass of wine and puts his arm around me.
“A lot of things have happened since we last saw each other.”
“I know. I read about your promotion. Congratulations!”
“Thank you,” he says graciously.
“And is Izabel happy?” I have to ask about her.
“I wouldn’t know. Last month, she finally signed the divorce papers and she’s back in Brazil.” He searches my face for a reaction.
“May I ask how you persuaded her?”
“I gave her everything she wanted.”
“Why would you do that when you were resisting back then?”
“Because it wasn’t worth it anymore. She wanted the money, and I wanted something far more valuable than that.”
“Are you talking about some property?”
“I’m talking about you, Livie. I wanted to be with you and I didn’t want you to run away again.” My heart is pounding, but I exercise restraint over my emotions.
“That’s not why I left, Tony.”
“But it is. You wanted me to make a commitment I had no right to give.”
“You mean because you were married?” He nods.
“That’s not the kind of commitment I wanted from you.”
“What then?”
I can’t bear to see him look so disconcerted. I sigh, not knowing what to say. “I don’t want you to make a commitment for the sake of making one.” I stand up, unhappy that we have to go through this conversation yet again. I pace the floor. “This is insane. We are going through the same thing again, expecting a different outcome.”