One Step Too Close - Coffin Nails MC Louisiana (Gay Biker Stepbrother Romance) (Sex & Mayhem Book 6) (19 page)

“You don’t have to.
You’re beautiful, and I want you with me. You’re not going anywhere,” Ryder
said, pressing a soft kiss to Jed’s cheek. His stubble was one of the best
things in Jed’s life right now, only teasing more pleasure out of him.

Jed would purr if he
were a cat. “I’m not.” Ryder wanting him this way was a dream come true. He
didn’t even want to think about the elephant in the room that Ryder wasn’t even
aware of. The other thing that had pushed Jed to the bridge tonight. Dana.
Blackmail. Betraying the club. A chill ran down his spine, but he pressed
closer to Ryder and everything was better.

Ryder smiled as he
picked up something from the mattress and showed it to Jed. It was a pair of
handcuffs, the same Ryder had removed from Jed’s hand before they mounted his
Harley. He opened one and clasped it around Jed’s wrist.

Jed blinked and
swallowed, frozen in place. “Oh… Okay. I never really… I mean, I could try it
if that’s your thing.”

Ryder sank his face into
the pillow with a low groan. “Those are for me to get a good night’s sleep.
You’re not going anywhere while I have my eyes closed,” he said with the
muscles in his jaw twitching. “I’m never forgetting that you tied weights to
your legs and wanted to kill yourself today. I’m not letting you leave. Ever.
Don’t do this kind of shit to me.”

Jed sighed and nodded, feeling
guilty about causing Ryder so much grief. That was why he’d wanted to disappear
quietly in the first place. He’d thought of many options but knew he didn’t
want Ryder to find his body. Now, it all seemed like a much longer time ago
than just a few hours, but he understood where Ryder was coming from with the
cuff. If Ryder left, or worse, hurt himself, Jed’s heart would break.

“I’m sorry.” Jed gave
Ryder a soft kiss on the lips. “I was in a bad place.”

“If you ever feel like
this again, we will work it out,” said Ryder, glancing at Jed with his intense,
sincere eyes. He didn’t even break that connection when he closed the other
cuff on a thick bar at the headboard. “You’re mine now.”

Jed bit his lips and
took a deep breath as his heart turned into goo. Yes. That’s what he wanted. He
could feel cum slowly oozing out of him, and now that it was real, it was a
confusing feeling. It was Ryder’s. He could wait ‘til morning for a shower. “I
can still feel that,” he whispered.

Ryder blinked, but then
his mouth opened in a bright grin, and he cuddled Jed closer, slowly moving his
hand down his side, all the way to Jed’s sensitive buttocks. “But it was good
for you, right? You enjoyed it?”

Jed didn’t mind having
his hand cuffed if it meant Ryder could sleep soundly. He nodded and slid his
leg between Ryder’s to get more entangled in him. “I’ve never felt anything
like it. I was really freaked out at first, but then… I don’t know if it was
the rhythm, your size, or something inside me, but it just
clicked
. It
felt like my dick was getting fucking jerked off from the inside. I mean… wow.”

Ryder kissed Jed’s nose
and petted his ass. Relief spread over his face. “I was... kinda worried that
it wouldn’t do much for you, and we’d... be close like that, but only one of us
would be really getting something out of it.”

“No. I wanna explore
this so bad. It’s like I was drowning, and now I finally got to breathe.”

Ryder scowled. “Don’t
talk to me about drowning. And for the record, I’m not letting you out of my
sight from now on.”

Jed groaned. He didn’t
mean the drowning thing in that way. “What? You’re gonna escort me to the
toilet?” He imagined that happening at the club, and the faces their friends
would make at that.

“I just might,” said
Ryder, and a grin colored his face as he closed his arms tighter around Jed.

Jed shut his eyes and
drifted off to dreams of getting his cock sucked by Ryder in the restroom. For
once, his dreams might actually become reality one day.

Ryder

Ryder woke up to a warm
body in his arms. He buried his face in the long hair and moved his hand up and
down a toned chest, which tickled him with hair. He stirred, surprised by the
unfamiliar shape, but then memories of last night flooded his brain. He’d
fucked Jed. Jed’s eyes had never left Ryder’s face as he drilled his cock over
and over again into that warm, pliant body. He slowly moved back, pulling on
Jed’s shoulder to turn him on his back, and a furious pulsing spread throughout
his head.

Jed groaned, and the
handcuff rattled against the headboard as he turned, squinting at Ryder as if
he too wasn’t yet sure where he was. Seeing his handsome face on a pillow next
to Ryder was like the sweetest caramel drizzling over Ryder’s heart.

He petted the top of
Jed’s head, still unsure what to make of what had happened. All those years
spent fighting any and all trace of attraction to men. To Jed. And this was how
it ended. As much as Ryder had always denied himself a taste of men, he didn’t
feel like what he did was wrong. With Jed, it had been all tenderness and
warmth, and when Jed smiled at him, when he called out Ryder’s name and accepted
him inside his body, Ryder felt close to him like never before with anyone.

Ryder himself was
confident enough to know he really loved girls, but in comparison to the
closeness with Jed, to the onslaught of emotions so thick he could choke on
them, the excitement from being with an attractive woman was nothing. And he
didn’t think it was about being with a guy either. It had been very pleasing to
fuck Max, but it was at most five out of ten, regardless of how attractive Max
was. Jed on the other hand sent Ryder’s pleasure through the roof. As much as
Ryder had always thought he could suppress his attraction to men, the problem
was that he couldn’t suppress his attraction to Jed, because there was no one
who could replace him. He’d always thought he could just choose not to go
there
.
That other men who considered themselves gay were just lazy fuckers who took
the easy route of fucking other guys. But he couldn’t choose anymore.

“Oh, wow… I did die
after all.” Jed’s mouth spread into a smile that made his dimples become more
pronounced, and Ryder wanted to smack him for the morbid joke.

“Stop saying this kind
of stupid shit,” said Ryder, closing his hand over Jed’s mouth. He pushed
closer and kissed him on the nose, watching the bright blue eyes follow him with
an expression of wonder. In that moment, he knew he didn’t want anyone else in
his bed. As new as this situation was, Jed was the one person Ryder was most
comfortable around.

Slowly, Ryder peeled his
hand away, but Jed followed it, and licked the inside of Ryder’s palm.

It sent a jolt of
electricity to Ryder’s cock, and he grabbed Jed’s jaw, kissing him firmly.
“Cocky, aren’t we?”

Jed smiled into the kiss
and pushed his free hand into Ryder’s hair. “Yep, I’m still the same guy.”

“You’re a damn hot piece
of ass, I’ll give you that,” said Ryder, rolling on top of Jed. Being over him
like this, touching someone he felt so strongly about, was the most amazing
experience. He couldn’t get enough of it.

Jed gasped, and seeing
his lips part only reminded Ryder of how eagerly Jed had sucked him off
yesterday despite a storm rolling over them, despite having to kneel in a
puddle. “You’re not so bad yourself,” Jed whispered.

Ryder moved the back of
his hand down Jed’s chest, marveling on how the skin reacted to his touch. “You
okay?”

“I’m a bit… I can still
feel it.” Jed laughed nervously, and seeing him so vulnerable made Ryder even
more eager to protect him. “But it’s not a bad feeling. Just different.” He
cupped the side of Ryder’s face and ran his thumb over his stubble.

Ryder kissed his hand
and slowly lowered himself to lie on a body that was so big and strong in
comparison to what he was used to. “I am still inside you.”

The flush coloring Jed’s
face was a marvel. A whole new side of him that Ryder wanted to explore. “I’m
not sure how this should work. Should I have showered? What do gay guys do?” He
took a deep breath, and his fingers explored Ryder’s neck.

Ryder reached to the
nightstand and returned with a small key after a bit of fumbling. “What do you
mean what they do? I’m not going to a parade. That’s too much.”

“Christ, no. I mean, in
the sex stuff. I kinda… I always tried to only watch straight porn.” Jed looked
away as Ryder opened the handcuff.

Ryder blinked, opening
his mouth in shock. “What do you mean you haven’t watched gay porn? You said
you’re gay?” He flushed, remembering all the times he’d secretly watched some
and jerked off to it.

Jed groaned, but never
stopped petting Ryder’s arms. “I don’t like pussy, so I guess that’s what makes
me this way, but… I tried not to be. I thought I’d be gayer if I get into
watching this stuff. And you said it yourself, that it’s like an addiction,
and…”

Ryder growled and lay
his head on Jed’s chest. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I fucked up so hard.”
He
didn’t even do what he preached, and then there was Jed, who all this time had
never sexed anyone that he actually wanted. It was fucking sad.

“I tried to be more like
everyone else. And they don’t exactly teach you the ins and outs of anal at
school. Unless they did after I dropped out.” Jed stroked Ryder’s back.

Ryder chuckled and
gently nipped at Jed’s cheek. “I think it’s one of those things you just need
to put into practice and perfect this way,” he said, his brain suddenly spiking
with awareness.

“I thought you’d say that.
What makes you think I’d put out so easily?” Jed snorted and playfully pushed
on Ryder’s shoulder.

Ryder chewed on his lip
and grabbed Jed’s hands, pinning them against the mattress. “You were pretty
easy yesterday.”

Jed gasped and struggled
against him, wrapping his legs around Ryder’s hips. It reminded Ryder of the
dozens of times when they’d wrestled for the TV remote when they were younger.
Only now the prize was much sweeter.

“‘Cause I’m a slut for
biker cock.” Jed grinned, and watching him so happy and horny—judging by his
growing erection—was the best thing ever. Only now, seeing the comparison,
could Ryder notice just how subdued Jed had been. It was a shocking change.

“Yeah? You wanna serve
your VP? Take the edge off now that he has so much on his plate?” teased Ryder,
trying to pull Jed’s hands back, but they wiggled out of his grasp.

“Can’t you tell a
prospect to suck you off?” Jed tried to throw Ryder over by grabbing his arm
and using his legs at the same time, but he ended up facing the pillow, with
Ryder on top of him. Victory clang in his ears as his cock rested against the
crack of Jed’s ass.

“We don’t have one
anymore, remember?” whispered Ryder, grinding his hips against Jed.

“I guess I’ll have to do
my duty to the VP then,” Jed rasped and pushed his ass against Ryder’s dick all
too eagerly.

“Yeah? I should take my
spoils?” Ryder laughed and tangled Jed’s long hair around his hand, smelling it
as he rubbed himself against Jed’s back. This was the best thing that had ever
happened to him.

“I wanna feel it again,
Prez
,”
Jed muttered into the pillow, rocking his body back and forth, and making the
prettiest picture. With his shoulders wide and muscular, with the tattoo on his
back, yet yielding to Ryder completely.

Ryder kissed Jed’s nape,
hungry to see him flush and moan. Jed stirred, whimpering into the pillow as he
pushed his ass up. “When I’m actually club president, I’m gonna give you a
property patch.”

“You wanna make me come
already?” Jed groaned and reached back to stroke Ryder’s side.

Ryder swallowed hard and
sucked in the soft skin below Jed’s ear. “That’s how much you want it? You’re
already mine.”

Jed scraped his nails
over Ryder’s side, giving Ryder goosebumps. Only now Ryder noticed a few small
hickeys on Jed’s neck. He hadn’t intended to leave them, but now he was tempted
to mark Jed with another one.

“I’ve never wanted
anything more.”

A wave of tenderness
washed over Ryder’s chest, and as he reached for the lube, he nuzzled Jed’s
ear, already beyond excited. “I’m gonna make you happy now. Tell me if you’re
not. Please?” he whispered, still haunted by the sight of Jed trying to jump
into the cold waters.

“I will. I don’t want to
disappoint you, but I will.” Jed spread his legs farther, and just looking down
at his firm juicy ass made Ryder’s cock twitch.

Nature took its course,
and very soon, Ryder was climbing on top of Jed and holding on to his shoulders
as their bodies connected again. It was so much easier this time, with Jed’s
body soft and relaxed from sleep as Ryder pushed into him. And just like
before, Jed bucked his hips, pushing back, as if Ryder’s cock was curing all
the sadness left in his heart.

It was sweaty, messy,
and so beautiful Ryder still wasn’t sure what to think. None of his previous
partners had ever made him feel as elated, even Jess, with whom he’d been the
longest, whom he thought he loved. Maybe it was simply Jed who had been on his
mind all along, preventing him from actually falling for anyone else?

They had to finally get
up and shower, but Ryder took his time ogling Jed in the morning sunshine on
the way. It was like seeing him for the first time, every muscle and plane of
skin was now available to touch. He could hug Jed, play with his hair, kiss his
smiley lips, do all the forbidden things he’d always secretly wanted to.

He was now grateful he’d
installed a big stall, because their bodies could both easily fit inside. Ryder
pushed Jed against the tiled wall, shielding him from the initially cold spray
of water. “So... I guess I’m awake enough to talk now,” he said, pressing his
lips to Jed’s temple.

Jed took a deep breath,
but then whimpered when droplets of cold water hit his body despite Ryder’s
sacrifice. “I’m more sober than I’ve been in a long time. And I’ve never felt
so satisfied. Like I’ve had a hard-on for years, and could never get off. You
know, like when you want to yawn, but just can’t seem to get air into your
lungs?” Jed pushed closer and wrapped his arms around Ryder’s neck.

Ryder rubbed the thick,
well-sculpted arms, without ever looking away from Jed. It pained him to listen
about just how unhappy Jed had been all this time, and he’d do his best to make
it up to him. His eyes instantly turned to the red spots on Jed’s forearms, and
he remembered seeing more of the same on Jed’s legs. “Are you... burning
yourself on purpose?”

Jed looked at his arm in
surprise, and Ryder could sense the lie on the tip of his tongue, but Jed
nuzzled Ryder’s neck with a sigh as the water heated up, creating pleasant
steam around them. “I don’t think about it much… I just get so angry sometimes,
and I don’t know what to do with it. Like when you came back from jail and were
getting a lapdance from a stripper
I hired
. I had to hit something or I
would’ve gone mental.”

Ryder sighed as bile
rose in his throat. “If you must hit something, then hit me. You can’t go on
like this. I’m not gonna let you,” he muttered, grabbing Jed’s wrists and
brushing his thumb over the scabs on his knuckles.

Jed looked into Ryder’s
eyes, his own even more like a Caribbean sky in the sunlight. “I don’t want to
hit you. Yet.” He snorted. Everything was always a joke to him, and then he
ended up on the edge of a bridge, having bottled up all the serious stuff.

“But you’ll have to,
because if I see you’re hurting yourself again, we’re gonna have serious
issues,” hissed Ryder, kissing the red dots on Jed’s forearms as water heated
up on his back.

“I’ll try to talk to you
about it. My big brother after all, right?” Jed’s nervous laugh got a higher
pitch this time, and the uncomfortable silence that followed was no laughing
matter.

Ryder scowled, suddenly
freaked out as he looked at both their cocks in the streams of water. “I— I
don’t think I can be your brother anymore.”

Jed stood close to him,
and the feelings his tattooed, hunky body evoked were definitely not fraternal.
“We both know what we feel, right? We’re not blood related. These things
happen,” Jed said, even though he didn’t sound so sure.

Ryder gasped and
smoothed the hair on Jed’s head with his fingers. “I know. I just can’t be like
this with my
brother
. It doesn’t connect well in my brain.”

Jed stood on his toes to
kiss Ryder on the lips. “I know. It’s messed up. Let’s be friends and go from
there…”

Ryder shook his head,
frustrated. “We’re not
friends
. I don’t want you as a friend. I want you
here with me. In my bed.”

“What are we then?
Lovers? That sounds weird.” Jed got some shower gel and began massaging it over
Ryder’s chest.

“Why, you’d rather be
fuckbuddies?” growled Ryder, looking away from him. “What’s wrong with lovers?”

Jed’s slippery hands
traveled down to Ryder’s stomach, and if he hadn’t come just half an hour ago,
he’d be getting hard again. “I guess it’s not that bad. ‘Cause
boyfriend
doesn’t say what I feel about you.
Fuckbuddy
sounds like we’re only
going at it.
Lover
,” Jed said with a thoughtful expression. “I guess
it’s not like you’ll ever need a word to introduce me with to anyone.”