Orphea Proud (17 page)

Aunt Minnie cleared her throat. “Hello, Grandpa Babe … it’s Minerva Proud speaking. That well you dug will have plenty of water this summer on account of all the snow this year. If you’re wondering, your wife’s family store is still going, though it’s doing poorly. Called Proud Store like always. Your son
Eugene and his family went back to the Proud name after you died. Your Grimes relations took their name away when they took your body. Matter of factly, though, we got a young Grimes with us today. Name of Raynor. Not from your branch, but you’re all kin. We also brought Orphea. Cleopatra and I thought we might be the last of the Prouds in these parts, but then young Orphea came to live with us.”

Aunt Cleo reached down and touched the stone. “Rest now, Grandpa.”

In the car on the way back to Proud Road, Aunt Cleo offered a theory on why Jameson Grimes’s marker was in the Gallitan plot instead of being with the other Grimeses.

“His sister was married to a Gallitan,” she explained. “And she’s the one who came to take the body. When she fetched Grandpa Babe’s body, she had it buried in her husband’s plot. Probably the other Grimeses didn’t want him in the big plot with all the other Grimes family members.”

“Maybe they thought he wouldn’t be noticed if they stuck him someplace out of the way,” I suggested.

“They were ashamed of him,” said Aunt Minnie. “They gave him a real plain marker compared to everyone else’s.”

“Why were they ashamed of him?” asked Ray.

“Because he married one of us,” said Aunt Cleo.

“Plain dumbness,” said Lola, “that’s what it was.”

After that, how could I keep my secret? I was still afraid, but hadn’t Aunt Minnie been afraid? Besides, I wanted them to know me, to know me as well as I was getting to know them. By keeping my love for Lissa a secret from my aunts, I was keeping myself outside of the circle. I was keeping myself apart from what I wanted, a family.

I chose a rainy afternoon when Ray was at his own house and Aunt Minnie couldn’t garden. She was sorting flower seeds at the table in front of the stove. It had warmed up enough so that we no longer needed a fire during the day. Aunt Cleo and I had just finished a round of tic-tac-toe. I put down the pencil and stood up.

“I have something to tell the two of you.”

Aunt Minnie looked up from her sorting. I was facing them both.

“I’m gay. That’s the reason I came here. There was no problem with math. I had a friend named Lissa. We fell in love with each other. Rupert found out and got really angry. He said we didn’t have people like that in our family. I acted kind of crazy. So Rupert and Ruby drove down and dumped me here.”

I waited for what seemed like an eternity.

Aunt Cleo broke the silence. “Why didn’t you tell us before?”

“Rupert told me not to. He said you were righteous.”

Aunt Minnie grunted. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you think it’s a really bad thing, even a sin. Ruby told me to forget my feelings. But I can’t.”

Aunt Minnie got up and walked over to me. “My definition of righteous is different from Rupert’s.” She touched my cheek. “You’re family, honey child. The fact that you’re gay, as you call it, doesn’t take away from that.”

“Uncle Jed was gay,” Aunt Cleo sang out.

“Someone else in our family?”

“At least one someone else,” she said, wheeling herself over. “Bookworm Jed, we called him. He was so good to us. Never got married. Didn’t talk much about being gay; people didn’t talk about it then. But everybody knew. And it didn’t make a bit of difference in the way we felt about our uncle.”

Relief washed over me. “You don’t think I’m unacceptable?”

“Of course not,” said Aunt Minnie. “I worry about how other folks who don’t understand these things might treat you, though. But you’re strong. You know who you are.”

Hearing her say that, I began to feel stronger.

“Daddy would probably roll over in his grave—that’s what Rupert said.”

“We’ll never know,” said Aunt Minnie. “I do know that your mother would have loved you even more, if that’s possible.”

“How do you know?”

“Nadine was a free spirit. She’d never judge a soul.”

“She wasn’t in the position to,” Aunt Cleo added. “She lived her life just the way she wanted to.”

“But she wanted to sing opera—she gave up her dreams for Daddy. That’s the way it seemed to me.”

“It may have looked that way to you when you were a little girl, Orphea, but I don’t think that’s true. Nadine’s dream was to marry Reverend Apollo Jones and to have a little girl.”

“Don’t forget going to Kenya,” Aunt Minnie reminded her. “If Nadine had wanted to leave Apollo, she wouldn’t have hesitated.”

“Do you really think she would have still loved me?”

“Would you let something stop you from loving her?” asked Aunt Minnie.

“No. Never.”

“There’s your answer.”

Aunt Cleo fanned herself. “Knew there was something on your mind. Glad you finally came out with it.”

“You didn’t believe the story about math?”

Aunt Minnie hooted. “We weren’t born yesterday, pumpkin.”

“This calls for a soda pop,” said Aunt Cleo, crossing to the refrigerator case.

“No ginger ale, root beer, or orange,” I told her.

“Fine. I’ll take black cherry. Want one?”

I sat down at the table. “Sure.”

“Minnie?”

“No thanks. I’ll just have me a chaw.” She pulled out her tobacco pouch. “So, where’s Lissa?”

“That’s the other piece. She died in a car accident, just before I came down here.”

“Oh, my …,” murmured Aunt Cleo. Aunt Minnie put her arms around me.

“You’ve been through a lot, girl. But we’re here with you. You’re home.”

The following day the sun was out. I went over to speak with Ray and asked him to wake up his mother. I wanted my aunts to see Lissa in the daylight. Aunt Minnie and Aunt Cleo got into their best clothes for the occasion. Though Lola didn’t know the whole story, she was excited about the plan.

“I’d love for them to see Ray’s horses! I haven’t checked in on him myself in months.” She even insisted on making punch and opening a bag of cookies for the event. “This is a regular art opening,” she said with a giggle.

Ray and I wheeled Aunt Cleo out onto the porch. She was wearing a pearl necklace. Aunt Minnie was carrying a big red pocketbook, which she gave to Aunt Cleo to hold while she, Ray, Lola, and I lifted the wheelchair off the porch and pushed it across the road.

“I feel just like a queen,” chirped Aunt Cleo. “Leaving the store twice in the same month.”

We set the wheelchair down in front of the root cellar and Ray opened the door. Aunt Minnie stepped inside and stood out of the way, so that Lola could squeeze in. There was just enough space left in the doorway for Aunt Cleo to poke in her head. Ray and I waited outside. The first voice we heard was Lola’s.

“What happened to the horses?”

“I painted over them, Mama.”

“Where did this girl on the wall come from?”

“That’s Lissa,” Aunt Cleo said quietly. “She’s lovely!”

“Orphea’s friend,” Aunt Minnie explained.

“She showed me a photo,” Ray chimed in. “Do you like her, Mama?”

“Like it a lot!” said Lola. She came outside beaming. “First time you ever painted a person. Good job!”

“She died,” Ray told her.

“That’s awful!”

“She wasn’t only my friend, she was my girlfriend,” I said.

“You’re queer?”

“If you want to call it that.”

She shrugged. “Oh, well. Can’t help who you fall in love with. I thought I was marrying a guy with his head on his shoulders, turned out to be a space cadet. Sorry about your friend, though.”

“Thanks.”

When we carried Aunt Cleo back to the store, there were tears in her eyes.

“That girl could walk off the wall, she’s so alive. It’s like she could start speaking.”

After supper, I went to Nadine’s room and turned on the light. I looked at her baby pictures. It was hard to believe that my own mother had once been a baby. I picked up the doll on the nightstand and gave it a hug. Then I opened the drawers of her dresser. In one of them was a photo of the two of us standing in the snow with a boy. The boy was holding me in his arms. It took a minute for me to realize that it was Rupert. The photo appeared to have been taken on the same day as the one I’d always kept of me and my mother. Strange how I’d forgotten that Rupert had been with us. In the photo he looked like anybody else’s big brother. What else didn’t I remember? Who had taken the picture? I wondered.

In the second drawer I opened, I found a strand of pink pop beads and one of those diamond rings from a bubble gum machine. I put the jewelry on and sat down on the bed. I was waiting for some kind of sign from my mother. None came. So I got up and opened her closet. On the floor stood a small pair of white rubber boots. At that moment I heard a voice. I’m sure it came from my mind, but it was so strong and vivid; as if it came from somewhere else outside of me. But it wasn’t Nadine’s voice. It was Lissa’s.

Hey, Duckfeet!

I smiled.

Maybe Lissa and Nadine would meet up someday, I thought. I took comfort in that.