Our Lizzie (16 page)

He was bewildered. “Not putting up with what?”

“Mam's been hitting me for years, Percy, ever since Dad died. You don't realise how often she does it because she's a bit careful who's around when she lets fly. I know she doesn't like me, though I don't know why.” She took another deep breath, fighting off tears. “When I turned sixteen I promised myself I wouldn't let her hit me any more.” Her eyes were bleak and her voice wobbled as she added, “She has no right to hit me so hard and so often.
No right!
I don't do anything to deserve it.”

Percy stared at her. “How often does she hit you?”

“Every couple of days. Hard enough to make bruises, too.” After a moment's hesitation, she unbuttoned her blouse and showed him her shoulder. A large bruise was just turning yellow. “This one was the final straw, Percy. She had the rolling pin in her hand when she did that. It really hurt and it's been stiff ever since. I had to tell Mrs. D I'd bumped myself. Mam only hits me when you're out, and not when our dear lodgers are around, either. So it isn't just anger, is it? It's—it's calculated. She
likes
hurting me.” When he said nothing, she added, “You don't have to take my word for it, you can go and ask our Polly. Look at her bruises, too. Mam hits her and Johnny as well, but not as much as she hits me.”

It was a moment before he could form any words, so shocked was he by the size of that bruise. “Why didn't you tell me?”

Lizzie shrugged. “What would you have done?” She waited for a comment, but now he was the one staring into the empty fireplace. “Shall I move out? I'd have done it before but,” her voice faltered, “I don't think I'm earning enough to pay for decent lodgings.”

He raised his eyes and she was astonished to see them full of tears. “You don't need to move out, Lizzie. This is your home. I'll tell Mam I've given you a thorough scolding, but that you're unrepentant. I'll suggest she asks me from now on if she wants you punished.” He broke off and held out his arms. “Oh, Lizzie love, I'm sorry.”

She nodded, but did not go to hug him. He wasn't going to tell their mother she was wrong, he was just going to try to stop the beatings. Well, she'd done that already by hitting her mother back. They both knew it. She'd wept about the situation so often, usually sitting out in the lav, that she seemed to have no tears left now. “I'll do my best to keep the peace, Percy. But I'll hit her back if she lays one finger on me again. I mean that.”

He came across, pulled her stiff body into his arms and gave her a long hug, rocking her to and fro, and though Lizzie held herself stiffly at first, after a moment she leaned against him and then the tears came.

“I thought…” She sobbed against him. “… I thought you'd agree with her. I thought you m-might turn me out.”

“No, love. You've every right to be here. I just try to keep her as happy as I can.”

When Lizzie had dried her eyes, she said quietly, “It's not fair on you, either. You're stuck with her now until she dies, because she won't marry again. Who'd have her? You should be finding yourself a nice girl and getting married.”

“We both know I shan't be able to do that.”

She sighed and clasped his hand for a minute. “Life isn't very fair, is it?”

“No. But at least we have enough to eat and a decent roof over our heads, which is more than a lot of other folk have. Pilby's have let a few chaps go lately, but the foreman told me I'm all right. And Mam keeps this place nice for us, you've got to give her that. So we've a lot to be thankful for. And you are happy at work, aren't you, Lizzie love?”

Her face brightened a little. “Yes. Very happy. Me an' Jack have a bit of fun together. Mrs. D doesn't mind us enjoying ourselves an' chatting, so long as the work gets done.”

“I saw you in the park with him last Sunday—with Polly walking behind. It looked like … are you getting a bit fond of Jack?”

She didn't pretend to misunderstand him. “Maybe. I don't know. I feel older than him sometimes, but we're good friends and that's enough for me at the moment. And I've got Polly as well as Jack. Me and her are right good pals now.”

Percy looked relieved. “I'm glad for you. Friends are a help.”

“Well, you should know. You've got Sam.”

“Yes.” But he had been a bit distant since Percy let him down on that deal. He changed the subject. “It's been a rotten birthday for you.”

She shook her head. “No. It's been—useful.”

But from then on her mother did not speak to her at all unless she had to. And Lizzie couldn't pretend that didn't hurt. Before there had been occasional patches where her mother hadn't been so bad with her, but now things were always hostile.

All in all, what with Sam and the situation at home, Percy found it a relief to go out to evening classes. It was his main source of pleasure now and he found that he had not lost his love of learning. Emma had been right about that. He told her so as they walked to and from their classes together.

“I like to keep my brain alive,” she said as they walked back through the moonlit streets.

“Aye.” But his thoughts were on her: her slender ankles, soft hair and dainty ways. She always looked lovely. But he had no right even to think that. So he tried not to look at her too often. And he didn't think she knew how he admired her.

*   *   *

Still upset about his mother's attitude to Lizzie, Percy mentioned the incident to Sam.

“You'll never change your mam. The best thing your Lizzie could do would be to find herself a chap an' get wed,” Sam said at once. “Then she'd be able to leave home.” He felt rather angry that Mrs. Kershaw had been bashing the lass he still intended to marry.

“Oh, Lizzie's found herself someone. But she's in no hurry to wed him.”

“She's found herself a chap?”

Percy was surprised by the sharpness of Sam's voice. “Aye. It came as a bit of a shock to me, too. They grow up quickly, don't they?”

Sam nodded and forced a smile to his face. “Yes, they do. Er—who is he?”

“Jack Dearden. And it's nothing definite. They're just good friends at the moment. They're both a bit too young to get serious. But they look happy together. I saw them in the park.”

“I should think they
are
too young. Why, I can still remember her walking along the top of that wall.”

Percy chuckled. “Aye. Silly little fool. But she seems to have settled down a bit lately. Perhaps putting your hair up is good for your brain.”

“Mmm.” Sam liked the way wisps of soft black hair always fell down the nape of Lizzie's neck, however hard she tried to pin it up neatly. She was getting a womanly look to her now—at last!

He made an excuse to leave the pub early that night and went for a walk round the silent park to think things over. Of course, he wasn't supposed to be in there at that hour, but he often scaled the gates at night. You couldn't have a quiet think in the house when Gran was around, nor could you think at work during the day. And Gran was failing lately, getting that shrunken look to her that he'd seen before when an old person was sliding gently towards the end of life.

I'll wait a bit and see what happens, he decided as he strolled past the little boat pond, too immersed in his own problems to notice the beauty of the moonlight shining on it. Yes, I'll see how Gran goes an' I'll keep an eye on Lizzie. No use rushing into things. Percy may be wrong about the lass courting Jack Dearden. He's not all that smart where people are concerned. He's better with his books and figuring, that one is. Sam chuckled. Why he wants to go to classes to learn about looking after money, I don't know. He'll never have any, that's for sure.

But Sam would. Had quite a bit of cash hidden away already. It made him feel good to know it was there if he ever needed it. And no one had ever caught him at his “night job,” because he was very careful indeed and didn't do places too often—even more careful than Josh, who was a wily bugger.

A little later, as he climbed back over the park wall, he nodded and said aloud, “But I shan't wait much longer for her. She's mine an' she allus has been, an' no one else is havin' her.” He didn't know why he continued to feel so strongly about Lizzie, but he did, so that was that.

*   *   *

By July of that year, Eva would have spent three years at secondary school, which would qualify her to start training as a teacher. She talked things over with Alice Blake, who had recently had some very good news, and then she asked Percy to speak to them both before she approached their mother.

He walked out to the teacher's little house on the Saturday afternoon, saw Eva's bicycle standing against the wall and found his sister cosily installed in the sitting room, looking more at home than she ever did in Bobbin Lane.

“Take that chair, Percy. It's the one we always give to gentlemen callers.” Eva and her teacher exchanged smiles. There was obviously some joke between them about this.

“It's very comfy.”

Alice smiled at the earnest young man. “A cup of tea, Mr. Kershaw?”

“Thank you. That'd be very nice.”

“And try one of these little cakes. They're Eva's speciality.”

He waited for them to tell him what they wanted. He had already guessed it must be be something that would cause more trouble with his mother. Since the confrontation with Lizzie, Mam was quick to take offence at anything and everything, and he'd noticed Polly's cheek looking reddened once or twice. He'd have to speak out about that if it went on, because Polly wasn't a naughty little lass. But it was hard to take your own mother to task. Well, he found it hard, anyway.

He accepted the cup of tea, ate a couple of cakes and waited.

“It's about my future, Percy,” Eva said at last.

“I thought it might be. Time for you to start training as a teacher in the autumn, isn't it?”

“Yes. I've done three years of secondary school, and now I have to apply to become a pupil teacher—I can get a small bursary for that, which'll help. Then after a year as a pupil teacher, I'll need to go to training college. That'll—well, it'll cost more money. And the brewery won't help any more, nor will Mrs. Pilby.” Alice had asked them.

He suppressed a sigh. “We'll find the money somehow.”

Miss Blake cleared her throat. “There is an alternative, one which will take the burden off your family and give Eva a better chance to learn how to teach.”

“Oh?”

“I've just been left a small house by an old uncle. It's over the other side of Rochdale and there's some money, too.” More money than she had expected, actually.

“I'm very glad for you.”

“It is rather a nice feeling to have the security. But the thing is, if I go to live there—well, I shall know no one. So I thought maybe I could help Eva and myself at the same time.”

Now he was thoroughly puzzled. “I don't understand?”

“I've made enquiries and I can get a job as a teacher nearby, but—well, I want to take Eva to live with me.” She'd applied for the job and had also mentioned her “clever niece” who wanted to become a pupil teacher and been assured by the headmaster, who was delighted to gain such an experienced teacher, that they could find a place for the lass as well. “Your sister will find it a lot easier to start as a pupil teacher in a place where no one remembers her as a child. And—and I've grown very fond of her.”

“I want to go with Alice,” Eva said firmly, putting one arm round her teacher's neck. “It's a much better way to arrange things, Percy, because it's so hard to study at home, and I'll have even more studying to do now, as well as lessons to prepare.”

“But—”

“And Mam makes such an atmosphere in the house. Honestly, it's murder when you go out to the pub with Sam. She's always yelling at Lizzie, even though she doesn't hit her any more. That's the only time she says anything to her. The rest of the time she tells me to tell her things, even when Lizzie's in the same room. And Mam hits Polly and yells at her, too. On and on. I don't know how Miss Harper and Miss Emma put up with it. Don't you think,” she hesitated, then asked quietly, “that Mam's getting a bit strange lately? You know, Percy.”

“Mmm.” He ignored the remark about Mam and let out his breath in a long, weary sigh at the prospect of more trouble. “I don't think she'll agree to your leaving, Eva love.”

“She may do when she realises how much money it'll save her—well, save you, really. You've been wonderful to us all, Percy. It's about time you had more of your own money to spend, not to mention a life of your own. You work so hard.”

He shrugged. “Even so, she still won't agree.”

“She will if we insist and keep on insisting. We'll just have to wear her down.”

“And anyway, I'm not sure that I like it, either.” He frowned at Miss Blake, then turned back to his prettiest sister. “It's like—it's as if you
want
to leave the family.”

Eva avoided his eyes. “I'll be coming back on visits.”

“How often?”

She flushed. “In the school holidays.”

His voice was sarcastic. “Three times a year?”

“You can come and visit me as well.”

“A couple more times a year.” If that. They'd never been a family for gallivanting and even when his father was alive had never gone away on holiday as others did, because his mother preferred her own home.

Eva and Miss Blake began to speak at once, then both stopped.

“I'll say it,” Eva said firmly. “I hate living at home now, Percy, really hate it. I've not been happy for a long time, but I couldn't see any way out so I just put up with things. Now there is a way out and I'm going to take it, whatever Mam says or does.”