Outcast (36 page)

"No one will believe it," Bonnie said. "Sylor knew how dangerous those birds could be, and so does everyone else around here. Nobody in their right mind would believe he would just blunder into their pen and let them rip him apart." The fact that Bonnie had done that very thing didn't occur to her at the time, though it did occur to Lynx. "Yes, but — "

"Drummond," Bonnie said quietly. "Thank you very much for trying to help, but we will tell the truth."

"Didn't tell the truth when you filled out that birth record, did you?" Drummond countered.

Bonnie glared at him. "That was something I did to keep Sylor from having any claim on Ulla, and you know it!"

Lynx looked confused. "Ulla?"

"For your information, the name on that child's birth record is Shaulla Dackelov," Drummond told him. "And it lists you as her father — and you weren't even living on this planet when she was conceived! How's that for being honest and truthful?"

Lynx stared at Bonnie. "It is not possible."

"Maybe so," Bonnie admitted, "but I had Drummond put your name down when I reported Ulla's birth. I didn't want Sylor coming back and claiming her, and I figured you wouldn't care one way or the other." Sighing sadly, she added, "I never thought you'd stay this long, anyway." So her name is — r

"The same as your mother's, Lynx. I think I spelled it right — not sure how it would be spelled in Zetithian, but what I came up is phonetically correct, anyway."

"You did this without telling me," Lynx said flatly. "Was I ever to be told?"

"Well, I'm telling you now, so that's a moot point, isn't it?" Sighing, she added, "Guess I should tell you the rest of it, too. When I claimed abandonment to get Sylor's name off the deed, for the price of one credit, which I withheld from your pay, you bought his share."

Lynx could hardly believe what he was hearing. "I have a daughter and I own this land?"

"Well, you share them both with me," Bonnie said, "but, yeah, that's about the size of it." Lynx still seemed confused, so she added, "I did it because I love you, and I didn't want Sylor coming back and trying to pick up where he left off."

"But he was the father of your child — " Lynx said, still trying to make sense of it all. " — her true father."

"Lynx," Bonnie said gently, "You are Ulla's true father — the only father she's ever known! You're the only one I want, and I wouldn't have let Sylor come back. Not even if I had to give up everything to keep you."

A frown furrowed his brow. "Then I should not have killed him."

"Why not?" Bonnie said with surprise. "He was trying to kill you, wasn't he?"

"Yes, but that is not why he had to die." Lynx looked into Bonnie's soft blue eyes. "I did it because of you. Because he was my rival, and I wanted to be certain that you would not be able to choose anyone but me."

"But I already have, Lynx," Bonnie said. "I love you, not Sylor."

"Then he did not have to die."

"Well, now, that's a matter of opinion," Drummond said briskly. He wasn't about to let Lynx go on blaming himself for killing Sylor — it wouldn't do him, or Bonnie, any good. "There are any number of people around the quadrant who want him dead. You just saved them the trouble. His name was really Ranx Prater, and he wasn't a purebred Vessonian, either; he was part Treslanti, which is why he could disappear. Vessonians can't do that. Seems Jack had some suspicions about him and did some asking around after that last visit and found someone who could identify him. He must've forged his documents to get here. That Treslanti ability doesn't show up on one of Vladen's scans, either." Drummond blew out an exasperated breath. "Damn crooks," he grumbled. "They keep getting smarter, and all I do is get older." Shaking his head, he added, "Maybe I should give it up and retire — just go back to Texas and plant avocados."

Bonnie smiled. "You can't leave!" she protested. "What would we ever do without you?"

"Probably do a lot better with someone else," he grumbled. "I must be getting senile."

"But you came here to get enough space to breathe, remember?" she reminded him. "And you can plant avocados right here. Don't leave. We need you."

"No you don't," he said gruffly. "That Zetithian boy can provide you with more protection than I can — but one thing you do need is a comlink that works! I tried to call you before I headed out here."

"I'll get a new one," Bonnie promised, trying to hide her smile. To Drummond, most of the people in the sector were like his children — which included Lynx. Bonnie liked that.

"See that you do," he said. "And in the meantime, you need to get to work on that boy so he doesn't bleed to death."

"Don't worry," Bonnie said, looking up at Lynx adoringly. "I'll take very good care of him."

L eaving D rummond to handle the matter of Sylor's body, Bonnie took Lynx by the hand and led him back to the house. She sat him in a chair and sealed his wounds and washed away the blood, just as he had done for her on that fateful morning that seemed so long ago now.

He watched her while she worked, seeing her expression of anguish, seeing the tears in her eyes, though she avoided his own gaze. "You are not angry with me?" he asked.

"For what? Still being alive?" Bonnie shivered at the thought that Sylor's plan might have succeeded. "When I think of what I might have found if it hadn't been for — how did you get out of that pen?"

"I had more than one way out," he said. "I was... prepared."

"Hmph! Might have told me about it," she grumbled.

"I have never let you in the pen since I came here," Lynx said. "You did not need to know." Upon hearing his words, she realized he was right: she hadn't set foot inside either pen for any reason. He had always done it. He'd been protecting her from the very beginning.

"Would you mind telling me what else I don't need to know?"

Lynx smiled. "I will tell you everything from now on," he said. "Whether you need to know it or not."

"Well, that's a relief! Too many secrets are a bad thing! And speaking of secrets, I had no idea Sylor wasn't a pure Vessonian! Guess I'll have to check out Treslanties to know what I'm up against with Ulla."

"She will not be like him," Lynx said, understanding Bonnie's concerns immediately. "She will not use her abilities for evil as he did."

"I certainly hope not!" Bonnie said with a shudder. "I always knew he was manipulative, but this...

this is... horrifying. "

Lynx took her hand; his grasp was warm and strong and soothed her overwrought nerves like a balm. "She will be honest and kind," Lynx said gently. "Just as her mother is."

"Are you sure about that?" Bonnie queried. "Had a vision, perhaps?" She knew it was something the other Zetithians were capable of — but she didn't know about Lynx.

"No," he said. "She will be that way because of you."

Bonnie met his gaze at last, and what she saw reassured her even more. In his shining eyes she saw nothing but the truth — however difficult it might be to accept. "Might be a little of your influence, too," she said. "I've never met a more honest man in my life."

Putting his arm around her, he pulled her close. "Nor I a kinder, more loving woman. You were kind to me even when I was not."

"I couldn't help but be kind to you, Lynx!" Bonnie protested. "You'd been a slave — I can't imagine a worse fate."

"I can," he said. "Loving someone who does not love you in return." Lynx understood just how much pain he had caused her, and he vowed never to hurt her again. He would spend the rest of his life doing anything he could to ensure her happiness. Leo had been right; it was his purpose to love her, and he would dedicate his life to it. "I am deeply sorry I could not see it in the beginning." "See what?"

"That no matter how much hate I had stored up inside me, that I would love you and would make you my mate," he said. Gazing into her deep blue eyes, he found healing and solace there, and knew he would do so for the rest of his days. "My beautiful Bonnie," he murmured. "I love you more than you will ever know. Will you be my mate — for life?"

"I can't think of anything I'd like better," she sighed. For her part, it was already done, but hearing him say the words was a great comfort to her. "I love you, so much, Lynx. And yes, I will be your mate — forever."

Lynx felt a sense of joyous contentment wash over him. The hatred was gone. He could live again and truly be free. "I had no vision," he whispered, "but I should have known. Should have seen your face in my dreams and known that you would be the one to save me from myself."

"And I should have known when you rescued me that first day," she sighed. "You were so angry with me."

"If I was angry, it was because I knew that if you had died, any hope I ever had would have died along with you. It was very selfish of me."

Bonnie smiled. "I forgive you for that," she said, and followed it up with a loving kiss to ensure that he understood. She forgave him for everything; every tear she shed and every pain she endured.

None of that mattered as long as he loved her.

The horror of Sylor's death faded slowly for Bonnie. She knew there was no longer anything to fear, but her sleep was troubled. Lynx was there to soothe her fears, as his purring soothed her soul, but she wished with all her heart that Lynx had not been placed in a situation where he was required to kill or be killed. Bonnie thought Lynx would have more difficulty as a result and was surprised that she was the one having nightmares rather than him. Lynx slept better than he had in some time; knowing that his rival was no longer plotting his death made him much more relaxed. He, too, regretted having killed, but also knew that sometimes a man must do things he does not enjoy or look back on with pride.

Late one evening, the wind began to howl and the thunder rolled as rain fell in sheets, isolating their house from the rest of the world.

"No fires?" Bonnie asked as Lynx came to bed.

"No," he replied. "The storm is moving through quickly, though."

"I'm sorry to hear that," she said. "I like the feeling of being safe inside where it's warm and dry while the storm passes around us." Looking up at him, his face illuminated by the soft light, she added, "How did you ever stand being out in the shed when it was storming like this?"

Lynx laughed. "It was better than many places I have slept." He'd told her of the tough conditions on Paemay after he left the harem; of hot, dry days and cold, sleepless nights. Of dust and dirt and the odor of sweat filling his nostrils. The pain of muscles screaming from unaccustomed use, the jostle of rough company, and the sickening smell of even rougher rations. But those things were in the past and would remain so.

"When I first came here," he said, "that shed seemed like a palace to me. I have since learned that living here with you is much better," he purred. "Here, where I can be surrounded by the scent of your love."

"Can you smell it now?"

"Always," he replied.

"Not any danger of it losing its effect — is there?" Bonnie asked hurriedly.

"None," Lynx said firmly. "But you will see that for yourself. I look forward to many years of demonstrating just how strong your effect is upon me."

Melting into his arms, Bonnie felt complete and warm and loved. And when he kissed her, the feeling grew. These were the moments she enjoyed the most: the soft, wet kisses that sent her mind to a special place — a place as special as being in his arms.

Lynx sighed and slid gently inside; flowing into her with slow, undulating moves that came as naturally to him as breathing. There was hurry, no rush to reach climax, no need to do anything spectacular; he could take his time to savor her peaceful, warm, and deliciously satisfying love.

Bonnie had once said that she would have been happy just to hold him; now he knew just how true that was. He didn't need to impress her; he just needed to love her — and his need to show her how much he loved her was strong. Soft sighs escaped her, her joy escalating with slow, potent moves designed by his love. Then heat and light and mounting passion, followed by subtle, gently rocking waves of bliss. Her soft, wet kisses on his face, her fingers tantalizingly cool on his heated skin. Her languid body surrounding him, accepting all he had to give.

Where had she come from? How had he ever found such a treasure? Out of all the women in the galaxy, she had done what no other could do. Gazing down into her deep blue eyes, her halo of golden hair framing her angelic face, he didn't know why she had saved him, he only knew that she had.

Her eyes met his, and she drank in the sight of him. "That feels so good," she whispered, her voice soft and dreamy. "You have no idea."

"But I do, my lovely Bonnie," he assured her. "I know just exactly how it feels."

"You couldn't possibly," she murmured in protest — after all, she was the one for whom the orgasms were almost continuous, and she got to look at Lynx and hold him while he loved her. "Can you read my mind and tell me what I'm feeling?"

"No," he purred. "But I know what I feel, and it feels like love. Nothing could be better than that."

"To me too," she said. "I want you to stay right where you are forever."

"If only I could," he sighed. "But I know that I cannot."

Lynx did his best to prolong the inevitable, for watching her face while he loved her was an addiction. He could never get enough of her. When his climax came, he wasn't giving it to her or taking it all for himself; it was shared joy, and he felt the euphoria for the very first time.

Lynx knew the moment it happened — the beginning of new life deep inside her. He had never had a vision before, but he knew it was a true one; the one dream he'd had all his life; the dream that never came true. Bonnie may not have had a vision, but she, too felt a change; that change which comes when two souls entwine, having no secrets from one another, no fears that the love they share will ever end. The fear and uncertainty were gone. There was no going back. They would only move forward. And with the dawn of a new day, their new lives began.

Jack received the wedding invitation with a satisfied smile. "Ha! I knew she could do it," she chuckled. "I had faith."