Outlaw Bride (Lawmen and Outlaws) (7 page)

“Took you long enough. It’s September. Truth is, Sister Adelaide’s got Pinkertons on the case, and you been lying from the start. Soon as you opened your eyes. Who might I believe? A grown up nun or fake one? An outlaw girl to boot.”

“‘Course I lied.” She had a coughing fit, then settled herself. Spoke as loud as she was able. “You might have been the law. Or friend of the law. Besides which, Ahab has allies everywhere. When he’s around, the hills have eyes. Trees grow ears. I had to be careful.”

He sputtered, hurt. “I’m carrying goods for a passel of nuns. And you still thought ill of me?”

“No.” Jessy Belle turned from him. She was quiet so long a dust devil came alive a half mile down the road and died before she spoke again. “No. I fell in love with you.”

In love? Redd tried to turn his heart to stone. Another typhoon of dust rose as he kicked the post. ’Course her words couldn’t help move him, just a little. She was beautiful, and he’d felt stabs of desire for her more than once. But she was a dissembler. How could he ever believe anything from that pretty outlaw mouth?

“Ain’t love, Miz Jessy Belle.” Cleeland Redd told her the truth. “Just gratitude at getting rescued.”

“Nobody’s ever been kind to me before.” Her nose pointed up to the sky. “But I know how I feel.”

Nobody’s ever been kind to her before? He frowned. At least he’d had Ma. And Tawana. But before he could think too hard on any more of this subject, something he’d forgotten poked his belly, and he recalled the stick from her dug-up grave. He dug in a vest pocket and held it out to her. Brought himself back to the reality of dealing with an outlaw woman who couldn’t be believed or trusted.

“Reckon this belongs to you. Take it.”

Chapter Five

Jessy Belle knew what it was right off. Dagnab, she’d carved the thing herself. Her grave marker. The skin down her spine all but crawled off the bone.

“Take it.” Redd said again. Harsh. His tone set more gooseflesh rising, but she didn’t obey him. She might love him, was certain she did, but those days were over, letting some man order her around.

“I said, take it. Found this under a juniper tree. And a dug-up empty grave.” He didn’t sound like himself at all. “Thought you might identify it.”

Jessy Belle choked hard but hoped he didn’t notice, and took the stick from his hand after a short time of defying him. She saw something else fixed on the stick. Her heart slammed against her ribs like it wanted to bust them. She’d had no part in slashing these particular letters against the wood.

And neither had her brother, the ignorant fool.

Dread all but swamped her like the sweat had when she found herself dying. Shaking her head, shaking hard, she ran off to the gathering room to the one friend she had.

Or prayed she had. A friend to whom she now brought danger. Instead, she headed for the stable. Ornery old Blossom would do better than nothing to get her out of here, leave the nuns far behind before Ahab came to lay ruin. The pearls slapped against her ankles as she ran.

Tonight, in the deep darkness while everybody else slept, she’d steal Blossom. Like she’d done a hundred others.

But Teresa had gone ahead of her, was gently currying the old mare in the stuffy, dark stall. That was one task Jessy Belle also enjoyed and did well. Ahab insisted on good treatment for the horses he stole. She grabbed a brush, but Teresa rushed to hold Jessy Belle in her arms. She wasn’t much older, but Jessy Belle hung on her like a motherless child.

“Why, Sister Mary? What frets you? Has Mister Redd brought you bad news? Has he...”

So close to Teresa’s neck, Jessy Belle saw the hard swallow as her new friend fought for words. “Has he, did he...find out who hurt you?” Freeing one hand, Teresa started to finger the long set of beads she wore tied to the belt at her waist.

Like a sudden summer squall over the high plains, sobs ripped from Jessy Belle’s middle, from her soul itself. “I know who hurt me. Oh, Sister Teresa, I’m bad. I’m evil. I brought it upon myself. And now Mister Redd knows. And I might get hanged again. Or at least tossed into a hoosegow.”

Teresa crooned nonsense sounds against Jessy Belle’s scarf. “Now, settle yourself. Nothing can be that bad. We are all sinners who come up short.”

“No. It’s not the same as every day sins.” She shook her head wildly. “Teresa, I truly am evil. I’m an outlaw. And I almost got hanged yesterday.”

In the loudest whisper she could manage, she told Teresa her blame-filled tale. The two sat together on a bale of hay.

“Oh, Sister Mary.” Teresa’s comforting arms tightened even more. “Then you have truly been led to the right place.”

Jessy Belle gulped. “A convent? Where I can’t ever...love a man?”

Teresa looked around as if to make sure they were alone. “This is the best place to be if you’re running from someone. Something you did.”

“Well, I get the idea of sanctuary. Sister Avery mentioned it last night. How you took in Will. But...”

“No. Deeper than that. I’m someone like you.”

“An outlaw? I don’t believe you.”

“Well, I am thief and a murderer. Running from the law. I am no nun. No postulant. Teresa Avila isn’t my name at all. Saint Teresa lived long ago in Avila. A great mystic and theologian.”

“I don’t understand.” Jessy Belle touched Teresa’s long string of beads. “You look like you belong here. You act like it. Who are you then?”

Teresa looked long at her hands. “I’m a nameless woman from some other life. It’s better that you do not know.”

Remembering the canvas strips tight across her bosom, and living in dime novels as Jesse Ben Perkins, Jessy Belle understood that concept very well. “I’ve done the same. Lived in disguise. I’ll keep your secret.”

“I know that. And I’ll keep yours.”

“Well, you know how I came to be here.” Jessy Belle heard her own bitterness. “I got caught rustling horses and strung up down Pioneer Meadows. Managed to cut my way free. Mr. Redd found me sick and out cold on the road. I pretended to be addled, leastways until I found out who he was and what might lay ahead.”

Teresa nodded. “I made up my own set of lies. Yet Sister Adelaide Eugene claims I’m forgiven. You must tell her of your plight, Mary. If anybody can help you, she’s the one.”

Jessy Belle had to consider the possibility. If the mission gave her religious sanctuary, she’d be safe. Except...Sister Adelaide believed the gang had killed her beloved niece. Nun or not, she likely wouldn’t warm to Jessy Belle staying here ever after as a nun she didn’t want to become.

Likely stealing Blossom would be better all around. Specially with Ahab on the prowl.

“I don’t know, Teresa. I might be better off...on my own.”

Teresa’s head shook now, with such vigor her scarf settled lopsided over her hair. “That’s not the answer. Because you’ll never find yourself. And we all need somebody. Here at least you have folks that care. You have a chance.”

“How do you know that?”

“Come. Let’s finish brushing those dear mules. I’ll take Dolly.” Teresa stood up, and Jessy Belle started on Ditsy. “This is how I came to be here. My stepfather...took advantage. Time and time again. Since the time I was thirteen.”

“Took advantage? You mean, rape?” The foul word came forth soundless, like a soap bubble that was bursting.

Teresa nodded but looked off into the shadows. “Finally I found the courage to tell my mother, and she...she disbelieved me.” Breathing hard, but her hands upon the mule were gentle and caring.

Jessy Belle sagged against the strong Ditsy. Horror grabbed the back of her neck. In spite of all his sins, Ahab had worked hard to keep her virtuous despite the lust of the ruffians who wove in and out of the gang. “Ah, Teresa. No.”

“Mama said the bloody sheets was my natural woman’s time...” Teresa’s voice trailed off into the dim stall. “Mama said I had to be mistaken, if not a liar. As if I could mistake a man’s...”

Teresa’s eyes closed and she shivered. “My stepfather was too good a provider, Mama said. She’d never let him down or embarrass him.”

Bile rose up Jessy Belle’s gullet. She emptied her belly into the straw on the ground. Shivering, Teresa held her close.

“Teresa,” Jessy Belle said when able. “There’s no need to...open old wounds.”

Teresa touched a quick kiss to Jessy Belle’s forehead. “No, it’s fine. Sometimes speaking of it helps me feel clean. Like sweeping away cobwebs. I started keeping a knife under my pillow. Last time he came at me, I...stabbed him. Stole money from his study and ran. Five years now, I reckon. A clergyman finally led me to Sister Adelaide. From a newspaper in a town I can’t reveal, I learned my mama has set the law after me.”

“Teresa, I...” She wanted to grasp her friend close but didn’t know how.

“Mary, I have made my peace. I pray...” She touched the beads. “I pray all day that Mama will find her soul. I am forgiven. I am content here. And safe. Besides, no man would want me. I’m tainted.”

“You are not tainted!” Jessy Belle’s voice burst forth loud as she dared before pain hit her injured throat. “What was done to you was not your fault!” Anger, pity, fear tornadoed inside her head. “You trusted that man! You were a child. His child. He was supposed to love you and keep you safe. But he let you down. Like Ahab did me.” Her words choked her sore throat, and she gagged again.

“Are you all right?” Teresa’s hand and voice were soft.

Jessy Belle shook away her tears. “Yep. But Teresa, your mama let you down, too. Because of that, I know you’ll be a right fine mama to kids of your own.”

Like that holy saint of long ago, Teresa smiled. “I don’t want a man. Now come along. Will can muck up your sickness when he feeds the animals. Sunshine always heals my moods. Let’s go work in the garden for a spell.”

“Garden?” Jessy Belle wrinkled her nose and peeked out the barn door at the dusty yard.

“Behind the chapel.” Teresa still smiled. “We’ve got a spring nearby, with much good water for vegetables and herbs. Maybe a flower seed or two next spring. We’ve enjoyed fresh squash all summer.”

“Oh, flowers. Let’s go. I’m nearly finished with old Ditsy. Flowers surely would brighten this place.” Jessy Belle’s heart lightened, just a little. “My mama had something of a hardscrabble little garden once. Oh, how proud she was of her little swarm of zinnias.”

Her throat clamped. How loud Pa had laughed, stomping each and every one to death after an Easter day binge.

The same laugh still woke her up in the night sometimes.

“Those zinnias must have been lovely,” said Teresa.

Jessy Belle shivered in the hot sun. She had to believe Teresa, about the sunshine healing moods. But so far, something else bad sprouted in her mind. It wasn’t quite the same, her story and Teresa’s. She knelt down to pull a weed. Jessy Belle wasn’t tainted.

And all because Ahab had protected her from thugs like Rolly Gitts.

She pondered, lifted her face to the sun. Did she owe something back to the lost boy who had raised her how he thought best?

The stick Redd had given her poked through her pocket against her thigh. No. No, she did not. Ahab’s horrible message scared and sickened her. He was coming to get her. Or leastways the pearls. She had to hightail it out of here to keep these nuns safe.

Tears she hadn’t shed at her brother’s abandonment flooded her now. Dirt from her fingers mixed with the tears on her cheeks. Teresa had advised her sticking around and finding herself, but Jessy Belle wasn’t sure she’d like what she’d find. Not worth the chance should Ahab find her first.

“Sister Mary?” Cleeland Redd’s deep voice broke through her pain, the tangled squash vine and her tangled thoughts. Upon hearing that strong, stalwart yet gentle voice, the roots of her hair trembled.

So did the nails on her toes. She managed to scramble to her feet. Facing him brought both joy and fright.

“Mary? It’s time we confer with Sister Adelaide,” he said.

She pulled the scarf from her head and wiped her nose with it. Tried to still her pounding heart. Leastways she had a reason for her soft, trembly voice. “It is time, Redd. And now on, you call me Jessy Belle.”

****

She turned her face up to him, proud. Not defiant at all. Like she’d reached the top of some mountain all by herself. And she might have for real, all that dirt streaking her cheeks. Redd smiled.

Her eyelids shuttered quick, though. Like she might need somebody now and didn’t know how to ask.

“Go on, Jessy Belle.” Teresa pushed her gently, nodded first at her, then him. “Sister Adelaide is most kind. She’ll know what to do next.”

“All righty.”

She seemed small and sad, though, when she walked ahead of him toward the mission. Redd followed silent through the dusty yard, but his heart still tugged, his ears still burned. Somehow her words still hung on the gritty September air and he couldn’t help grabbing them.

Couldn’t help hearing once again her small, hurting voice.

What was done to you was not your fault! You trusted that man! You were a child. He was supposed to love you and keep you safe. But he let you down. Like Ahab did me.”

Her chokes had let him know she’d been fighting down bile. He didn’t apologize for the eavesdropping. Any worthy scout spied upon his foe when he could. Right now, he caught up to walk beside her, to find Sister Adelaide. Instead of ire, being that he knew just who she was, he recalled finding her near dead in the dirt.

Recalled a brother who left her to hang.

A brother who was supposed to love her and keep her safe. Well, Cleeland Redd had let Tawana down, not being around when she sore needed him. He wouldn’t do the same to this pretty blond gal who said she loved him.

Loved him? Thrills trickled up and down his spine as he stumbled, not watching, through a small, stony patch of cholla. Even him learning some Chiricahua and Tawana some American, she had never to his knowledge said those selfsame words to him.

Nor....shame blistered his skin. Nor had he in return. But something twitched across his body, his heart now, thinking of an alive girl who loved him. Not just twitching his manhood, which was just what a normal cock did around a pretty woman.