Outlaw (31 page)

He shrugged. “Cops take care of their own.”

“Yes, I guess they do.”

“Same thing the club would do for a member.”

“Really?”

“Yep.” He studied her. “So, what kind of help have
they been giving you?”

She looked away, and shrugged. “Some of them tested
to be donors. They’ve collected some money for the hospital bills. Stuff like
that. Why?”

Things his club should be doing for her, he thought.
“Just wondered.” He stood up. “Let’s go see our daughter.”

When they got to Melissa’s room, they were required
to wear masks, and gowns, and wash their hands with antibiotic soap. They
suited up, and walked into her room.

Her pediatric oncologist was there checking on her.
He turned, and looked over at them. “Hi, folks. She’s doing well.”

Cole walked over to him, and held his hand out, and
shook the doctor’s. “We haven’t met. I’m Cole Austin. Her father.”

“Right. The donor. Nice to meet you. And how are you
feeling?” the doctor asked.

“I’m doing fine. How is she?” he nodded toward
Melissa, who was asleep.

“Like I said, she’s doing well. How much do you know
about the transplant process, Mr. Austin?”

“Not as much as Angel, I’m sure.”

“Well this is the most critical stage, called
engraftment. It normally takes two to four weeks. During that time the immune
system is crippled, and very susceptible to infection and excessive bleeding.
We’ll be checking her frequently for signs of fever, chills, hives, chest pain,
etc. She’ll be on multiple antibiotics and blood transfusions of platelets to
help stop any bleeding. Blood samples will be taken daily to determine whether
engraftment has occurred, and how her organs are functioning.”

“Engraftment?” Cole asked. “What’s that?”

“Sorry. It’s when the marrow you donated to her
start to grow, and make new blood cells. When engraftment finally occurs, and
her body begins producing normal blood cells, she’ll be taken off the
antibiotics and blood and platelet transfusions.”

“And when does she get to go home?”

“It depends on how she does. She’ll be discharged
when she has a sufficient number of healthy red blood cells and white cells and
platelets. It can take up to four to eight weeks in the hospital.”

“Wow. I hadn’t realized she’d be in here that much
longer. When is she going to start feeling better?”

“Well, normally, patients experience symptoms much
like a severe case of flu during that eight weeks. She’ll probably have nausea,
vomiting, fever, diarrhea, extreme weakness.”

“My God.”

“After that it’ll take another two to four more
months to recuperate at home. And I have to tell you, the first weeks at home
she’ll just want to sleep, and maybe sit up, and maybe walk a bit. You’ll have
to be bringing her in for doctor visits several times a week during that time.
She’ll need to avoid crowds. The risk of infections will still be very high.”
He paused, studying Cole. “I have to tell you, it’s a long road. It’ll be six
months, maybe a year before she is healed completely, if everything goes well.”

“A year? Wow.”

“Like I said, it’s a long road,” the doctor
admitted.

“Yeah. I guess so. Thanks, doctor,” Cole said,
nodding to him.

“Well, so far everything is looking good. I’ll let
you two visit for a few minutes.” He spoke with the nurse, and then walked out.

Cole looked over at Angel. He’d had no idea what
this process was going to entail, for both of them. She’d need him here. He’d
have to make that happen. At least for as long as he could manage. He needed to
at least stay until Melissa came home. He looked down at his daughter. He was
afraid to get too close. He didn’t want to be responsible for giving her some
infection, no matter how many precautions they took.

Angel spoke with the nurse about Melissa’s
medications, and knew she’d be asleep for awhile yet. She turned to Cole.
“Let’s get you home. She won’t be awake for a few hours.”

“You sure? We can stay. I’m fine.”

“I’d rather go while she’s asleep, and be back when
she wakes up,” she explained, looking down at Melissa.

“Of course,” Cole agreed.

They drove back to the house.

Natalie was waiting with TJ. “How is she?” she asked
as soon as they were through the door.

“The doctor said she’s doing well. She was asleep,
so I thought it was a good time to bring Cole home,” Angel told her.

“Yes, of course. And how are you feeling, Cole?”
Natalie turned to him, resting her hand on his shoulder.

“I’m fine, just a little stiff and sore. Compared to
what Melissa has to go through, what I did was a piece of cake.”

“Never the less, your body has been through a
strain, too. You need to take it easy for a while. A week or two at least.”

He nodded to her, and bent down to where TJ was on
the floor playing with some blocks. “How ya doin’, buddy?”

TJ looked up at him, and smiled, and held out a
block.

Cole took it, and carefully set it on the top of the
tower TJ had built.

TJ swung his arm, and sent the tower crashing down,
letting out a howl of laughter.

Cole ruffled his hair. “Demo man, huh?”

“Demo?” Angel questioned.

“Demolition. It appears to be his thing.”

“He’s not old enough yet to be planning his future
career.”

“Hey, you never can tell.” Cole turned back to TJ,
and watched him start to rebuild another tower.

TJ smiled up at Cole.

Angel watched. She could tell TJ was loving the
attention. He was starting to bond with his father. Angel wasn’t sure if that
was a good thing or bad. Depending on just how much of a role Cole wanted to
play in his children’s lives. They really hadn’t had that discussion yet. She’d
been too worried about Melissa to think about anything further.

Cole stood up, and appeared a little wobbly.

“Are you dizzy?” Angel asked, reaching out to offer
a steadying hand.

“Yeah A little, there for a moment.”

“You should go lay down for a while,” she insisted.

“Yeah. I guess so.” He turned, and walked back to
the guest room. He closed the door, and lay down on the bed. He pulled his cell
phone out, and turned the ringer back on. He had put it on silent while he was
in the hospital. He looked at the read out.

Six missed calls. One from Mack’s number, and the
other five all from his wife.

Shit.

He needed to call her back. Might as well get it
over with. He punched in the number.

She picked up on the second ring.

“It’s me,” was all he said.

“Finally! I’ve called, and called. Why didn’t you
answer?” came her voice through the phone.

“I was in the hospital, remember.”

“I know where you were. Seems you could remember to
check in with your wife.”

“Mandy, don’t start.”

“There’s no money in the account. How am I supposed
to pay for shit?”

Cole sat up. “What do you mean? I left you over a
grand.”

“Well, it’s gone. Food, gas. I have expenses, Cole.”

He wanted to reach through the phone, and choke her.
“How could you have gone through a grand already?”

“I don’t know. But there’s no money.”

He blew out a breath in frustration. “I’ll call the
bank, and find out what’s going on.”

“I need money, Cole.”

“I said, I’ll handle it.”

“Well, how did it go? Everything okay with the kid?”

She finally got around to asking, Cole thought.
“Fine.” Fuck. Her very voice was beginning to grate on him.

“So, when are you coming home?”

“I don’t know. This transplant is going to be pretty
rough on her. I need to be here a while longer. See she gets through it.”

“What do you mean? How much longer? You said this
would only take a few days.”

And let the whining begin, he thought. “Look, I said
don’t start. Okay? It’s more serious than I’d thought. She doesn’t instantly
get all better.”

“What about me?”

“What
about
you?” Cole snapped back. Her selfishness had come to the surface not long after
they’d gotten married. It was really starting to turn his stomach.

“I want you home.”

“I don’t give a shit what you want,” he growled.

“You did your part. I don’t know why you have to
stay now.”

“It’s important I be here. She’s my fucking
daughter.” Cole was loosing patience with her. Things had been rocky between
them for a long time, and this just pointed out her neediness. He couldn’t stand
clinging women. He just hadn’t realized how bad she could get. She was one of
the most self-centered and controlling women he’d ever met. How he’d married
her without seeing it, was beyond him.

“Okay. Fine. So, another week, then?”

“I can’t say. It may take longer. I just don’t
know.”

“Longer? Cole!”

“Mandy, I’ll be back when I can. Look, I’ll call you
later. The meds they gave me are starting to make me sleepy,” he lied.

“You’d better call me. And I’m sick of getting your
voicemail every time I try to call you. You better start picking up your
Goddamn phone.”

Cole disconnected.

He couldn’t even bear to finish the call. It was
always about her. Her needs. Her problems. Couldn’t she ever once think of
someone else’s needs? My God, he hated to think what kind of a mother she’d
make. If Melissa had been hers? She couldn’t hold a candle to the job Angel was
doing dealing with a sick child.

Cole knew he wasn’t being fair, but to hell with
fair. Was life fair to Melissa? Had it been fair to Angel?

He tossed the phone on the bedside table. He’d have
to call Mack back later. He was in no mood to deal with him now. He was sure
Mack wouldn’t be thrilled with him staying out here longer, either. Well, tough
shit. He was just going to have to fucking deal with it. Besides, Mack owed
him, and he knew it. For all the lies and bull shit he’d put him and Angel
though. Maybe she wouldn’t be living seven hundred Goddamn miles away if it
hadn’t been for the shit Mack had pulled. Mack was just going to have to make
some amends. And if that meant cutting Cole loose for a couple of months, then
he’d better get used to it.

Cole lay back on the bed, and closed his eyes. He
was weaker than he wanted to admit. It didn’t’ take long for sleep to claim
him.

*****

Over the next couple of weeks, they fell into a
rhythm with either Natalie or Cole staying with TJ while the other went with
Angel to the hospital. Cole recovered fully, and was able to pitch in, and help
more.

One day, while Cole stayed with TJ, Natalie went up
to the hospital with Angel. It was going to be a long time before it was safe
for TJ to be around his sister. The risk of infection was just too great to
take any chances.

Cole enjoyed the time he got to spend with his son.
It gave them time to get to know each other, and to bond. But even so, Cole
realized that no matter how much time they had together, for as long as Cole
could manage to stay, it was never going to make up for the time he’d already
missed out on. Or the time in the future that they would be apart.

Cole sat on the front porch step, and watched TJ,
who was riding a tricycle around the driveway. Cole thought about what kind of
relationship he wanted with his children. Coming out for visits, how was that
going to work? Did that mean he would only get to see them for a few days every
couple of months, if that much? He knew what would happen. No matter how
diligent he was, every few months would soon become twice a year. He’d end up
being a stranger to his own children. That wasn’t what he wanted.

So, what did he want?

He wanted Angel. He wanted them to be together, like
a real family. Who was he kidding? They’d never be a normal family. Ozzie and
Harriet. The Waltons. The Cleavers. That Hollywood ideal? But then, what was
normal, and who had that perfect picture? Hell, perfect? He’d settle for living
in the same town. No. That was a lie. He wanted Angel in the same house. In the
same bed. He wasn’t going to be happy with anything less. That left only one
option. He had to divorce Mandy quickly, and make things right with Angel.

Would she even want him? What did he have to offer
her? He was still that same guy that knew he was no good for her three years
ago. What did he think was different now?

Everything, he told himself.

Kids do that. They change everything. He wanted more
now, and deep down he wanted to believe he deserved more. He could be a better
man for Angel, for his kids. Couldn’t he? If he didn’t believe it himself, how
was he ever going to make it happen?