Painting Sky (27 page)

The hot water warmed my chilled bones, which hadn’t recovered from the night. Even if Keith had been hot enough to replace a blanket, he hadn’t been enough for the low temperatures that plagued the area.

After blow-drying my hair and putting some makeup on, I went downstairs to help my mother—or, at least, to spend some time with her. That was why I came home this weekend.

I let myself fall on the kitchen stool and picked up some apples to peel.

“So, is anything new around here?” I started, hoping she would let the subject of Keith go.

After a couple of seconds of silence, she turned to me. “Matilda’s doing well in school. We were afraid she wouldn’t adapt to high school this quickly, but maybe she’ll get the message that education is important.”

The news she thought I wanted to hear was about my sister’s grades. I smiled anyway and nodded. “That’s good. Is she still dating Michael?”

With my mother, this wasn’t a touchy subject: she never really minded us dating. She did talk to us about precautions, though—not only with our bodies, but also with our hearts. She’d taught us to respect ourselves, and all that.

Matilda had dated since she was eleven, to my father’s horror, and had changed boyfriends as quickly as a punk rock singer changed her hair color. My mother worried she wouldn’t respect herself. My father worried she would come home pregnant with triplets—that’s how tragic his imagination was.

“They had a falling out a couple of weeks ago, but I think they’re back together. You’d have to ask her—she doesn’t talk to me about it.” She looked sad about the fact that the only child still at home didn’t confide in her.

She probably missed my brother’s bluntness over everything. He opened his heart up all the time, and I’d always gone to my mom for help and advice. She had been the first person I’d told about Cody. She’d assured me that my brother would come to his senses about us and support me when we had to tell my father. My dad hadn’t been enthusiastic, but he’d always cared about Cody as a son, so Cody was the least bad candidate.

“You know she cares about you. You’re our mom, though: she won’t tell you everything.”

Matilda had just turned fifteen. I sure hoped she didn’t have anything too daring to talk about.

“Do you tell me everything?” She stopped washing the plate and my heart skipped a beat. What was she getting at? Keith’s drive, or something else?

I played dumb. I was confused, after all.

“What are you talking about? Of course I do.”

“Of course you don’t,” she answered, annoyed, but she resumed washing the plates. “That’s okay. I don’t want you telling me every detail of your life. You could, at least, tell me about some life-changing moments, though.”

She had no idea that I hadn’t had many life-changing moments. I was still a virgin, but I couldn’t tell her that. In my case, it was better if I made my parents believe that everything was okay with Cody and that I had a sex life—at least, with him.

“There is nothing to tell, Mom.” I averted my eyes so she wouldn’t call out my lie.

“Is everything okay with you and Cody?” Of course she had to ask. She would be devastated when she found out. Our mothers had been planning our wedding since we’d gotten together. Secretly, so had I.

“I know you are still young and I want you two to finish college first, but have you thought about the future?”

This hurt. Knowing we wouldn’t have any future together was painful. I might’ve been pretending to be over it by now at home, but, here, pretending we were still together, brought out the pain all over again. I swear my mother had caught that as soon as I’d stepped inside the door, too. For now, I was saved by my sister, who delayed an answer I didn’t have.

Matilda ran from the door and threw herself into my arms, barely giving me enough time to put down the knife.

“Sis, I missed you so much. Mom and Dad are giving me hell here, by myself.”

My mother rolled her eyes at us, but still smiled, pleased to see at least two of her children together. Ryan hadn’t come home in a while.

“You’re exaggerating, as usual.”

“No, I’m not. ‘How’s school, Matilda?’ ‘How was the test, Matilda?’ ‘Have you missed school this month, Matilda?’ They go on and on about it every day.” She pouted, sitting next to me, as if those weren’t every parent’s worries. “You’re not here to get them in a better mood. At least they don’t compare us, anymore.” That stung. I knew she and Ryan had suffered from it, but turning it into a good reason for me to be away hurt. I just nodded and resumed peeling.

“How’s Michael?” I asked, so our mom would be able to participate in the conversation.

Matilda slowed down her rambling and looked between me and Mom. “Everything’s okay,” she answered, before getting up and leaving. She claimed she wanted to take a shower before lunch. I hadn’t even noticed that it was two o’clock but apparently my mother had a meat pie in the oven for lunch. The other stove was already occupied by the huge turkey. How that thing fit inside, I had no idea. The Hale family was probably also invited to have dinner with us.

After setting the table, I went to Matilda’s room. She had just gotten out of the shower and was wrapped in a pink towel. She dismissed my presence and let the towel drop to the floor. My sister had no decorum. I looked away. Although I was used to seeing people naked for class, my sister was on a different level.

“So, about you and Michael: it seemed like you wanted to tell more about it,” I started.

She waited until she had her underwear on before coming to sit beside me. “Yeah—it’s just weird, now.”

I didn’t like that. “Weird how? You haven’t—”

She shook her head. “No. He doesn’t want to.”

I didn’t expect that answer. It wasn’t usually the girl who was ready first. I looked into her eyes, waiting for her to continue.

“I want to, but he wants to wait. He says I’m too young.” She got up from the bed and searched for the rest of her clothes.

“That’s why you broke up with him?” I asked incredulously.

She turned to me as she buttoned her jeans. “How do you know I was the one who broke us up?” she asked, surprised.

I could see the whole scene in front of me: my explosive sister thought he didn’t care about her and broke up with him, only to realize she missed him and that he actually loved her and wouldn’t back off. This was exactly what she explained to me.

“You are too young, Matilda. You just turned fifteen, and he’s what? Sixteen? You should wait. Been there, done that.”

I had been there. Cody wanted to wait and I thought he was so sweet because of it. I just didn’t know he wouldn’t tell me when he didn’t want to wait, anymore.

Matilda must have read something in my face, because she changed from upset to worried. “What is it? Is it something to do with Cody?”

I was so sick of keeping my feelings bottled up and not confiding in anyone that the dams opened and tears started falling to my face. I wasn’t able to wipe them away. My baby sister came to sit with me and hugged me, until I cried out every tear I had kept inside me these past few weeks.

“What happened? If you don’t want to talk, it’s fine. I didn’t want to, either, when Michael and I broke up.”

I shook my head. I wanted to tell her, but, right then, my mother called us to eat. My sister went downstairs first, claiming I had a bathroom emergency, which wasn’t far from the truth. I splashed cold water on my face and had to wipe the mascara running down it. I was a disaster, and there was no way my mother—or even my father—wouldn’t notice I had been crying.

As I suspected, even though my face was almost composed, my mother caught it. “What happened?”

I had to come up with an excuse fast.

“A friend from school had an accident, but I think she’ll be okay.” It was awful to lie like this, but I needed to be convincing. I couldn’t have my mother knowing I had broken up with Cody. I suspected she had worries about me and Keith, even if that was preposterous.

“I hope so,” my father muttered, believing my lie.

“Where are Grandpa and Grandma—and Uncle Tom and Aunt Sarah?” I asked, trying to turn the attention off of me.

Apparently they’d gone to another town for the day. My aunt had wanted to buy some stuff and my grandparents had gone with them to distract themselves. They lived in a small town a couple of hours away and didn’t do much during the rest of the year, since they were retired, except for cultivate the land around their house. My aunt saw them even less than us, so they’d decided to spend the day together.

When my mom spoke about her sister, a happy smile crossed her face. “What is it?” I asked.

“Oh, nothing.” It was definitely something, though, and what else could it have been other than a baby? Aunt Sarah was ten years younger than my mother, had married three years ago, and had been trying for a baby ever since. I knew that they were having a hard time and that, lately, my aunt was thinking about giving up.

A smile spread on my face, replacing the previous tears. I was already opening my mouth, but my mother shushed me. “Don’t you spoil the surprise.” My sister caught up with the secret and she, too, smiled, but we kept silent. It was Aunt Sarah’s secret to tell. I just wished I was right. She would be the coolest mother ever.

I spent the rest of the afternoon hanging around the kitchen and living room. My father and sister were watching a movie that both had seen many times. My mother was still cooking. She hadn’t learned from previous years that there would be so much food left at the end of the weekend that not even distributing it to the entire family would be enough. I guessed I would be delivering Cody and Ryan a Thanksgiving dinner, after all.

At five, my grandparents arrived, followed by Uncle Tom and Aunt Sarah. I automatically eyed her belly, but she wasn’t showing. They could have been adopting a child. I looked forward to the announcement tonight.

They all hugged me, claiming to miss me more than the other, even though I had seen them on the Fourth of July. Aunt Sarah tapped my pierced nose and winked. Yeah, she would make the coolest mother ever.

“Come on, Matilda and Sarah. Help me set the table? Jane, go next door and see if Carl and Samantha are ready.”

I had no idea if she’d purposely left Keith out, if she’d forgotten, or if she believed he wasn’t invited. I wouldn’t let them leave him out. He already felt that his parents didn’t give a crap about him—I wouldn’t let my parents do the same. He’d welcomed me into his house, even if he had been an asshole about it, at first. He’d helped me, he cared about asking about my day, and he cared enough to pose for me when I needed him to. The least I could do was make him feel welcome into my house—my parents’ house.

“Don’t forget Keith’s coming, too,” I shouted to the room before leaving through the kitchen door.

The Hale’s kitchen had lights on, but no one was there. I made myself at home and went inside, tiptoeing around the kitchen and calling for Samantha. I didn’t want to catch my ex-boyfriend’s parents doing anything romantic.

“Hello, honey,” she greeted from the stairs, as she put beautiful earrings on. She hugged me tightly. I had missed her, too—she had been a second mother to me, after all. She made me miss before, when I could come inside without asking for permission and slip upstairs to meet Cody. I could invite myself for dinner, or let them know when Cody wouldn’t be having dinner with them. Those times were now lost forever.

Willing the tears to stay in my eyes, I stepped away. “I missed it here, too.” Yes, that defined my feelings.

“Carl will be down in a second, and then we’ll come over, if you want to go ahead.”

I wanted to wait, but, most of all, I wanted to ask about Keith. I searched for something to say that would allow me to linger without being obvious.

“My mom told me I needed to stay here for the night. Did she ask you?”

Samantha was taking a cold dessert from the fridge—as if we didn’t have enough food, already. “I was working all day and only had time to make this yesterday. I know your mom probably bought all the food available at the grocery store.” She eyed me, smiling.

She knew my mother too well. She tried to help out around Thanksgiving, even if my mother always dismissed her efforts, claiming that she had everything under control.

“Of course, honey. Your mother mentioned it yesterday. You’re always welcome here. Cody didn’t come home, unfortunately, so you can have his room.” She sprinkled something on top of the desert and picked up a bottle of wine from the counter. “Carl, come on. We’re going to be late,” she shouted to the ceiling. “I swear, they whine about us, but men take much more time getting ready.”

“Don’t I know it! I live with three guys. Ryan takes an hour getting ready every time he goes out,” I told her. Ryan had always been like that, ever since he’d found an interest in girls. Cody wasn’t so bad, but sometimes he’d taken more time than I did. I still had no idea about Keith. He didn’t go out much, and he had his own bathroom within his bedroom, which made it impossible for me to know his schedule.

“How are the boys?” she asked. I guess Keith hadn’t talked about home with his mother. If he had told his mother about Cody and me, she wasn’t giving any hints.