Part-Time Wife (8 page)

"Bet you're sorry you asked about my life," she said.

"Actually, I'm not."

"It's probably better that you know. I'll do a good job with your kids, but I won't get personally involved. In five weeks I'm going to walk away. I can't risk getting hurt again."

"I understand."

"Thanks for everything. Good night."

She gave him a brief wave, then walked down the two stairs into the family room, and across to her bedroom. She closed the door behind her.

He watched her go, then stood alone in the silence. He couldn't risk getting hurt, either. Krystal had taught him about the exquisite torture of a marriage gone bad. Night after night, he'd waited for her, wondering who she'd been with, and what he was doing wrong. He kept thinking if he was more …
something
– though he didn't know what – she wouldn't stray. But she had. And he'd been left to pick up the pieces of their broken family.

He knew what he wanted the next time around. He wanted a sure thing. He wasn't going to take any more chances on something as nebulous as love.

Chapter 5

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"
I
feel like I'm feeding an army," Jill muttered as she grabbed another armful of grocery bags and started through the short hallway that led into the family room.

She'd filled nearly two carts with food and spent more money in an hour than she'd spent on herself in the past four months. She set the bags on the counter and went back for the last couple. While she appreciated that some young man had helped her load the groceries into the car, it would have been a lot more helpful if he could have followed her home and helped her carry them inside.

She slammed the rear door of the utility vehicle, then kicked the door to the garage shut behind her. When she put the last two bags down, she counted

"…fifteen, sixteen,
seventeen
bags? These boys know how to eat."

Before starting to unload everything, she tossed another load of laundry into the washer. She'd barely gotten the frozen food into the freezer when the phone rang.

She juggled bags of apples in one hand and reached for the receiver with the other.

"Hello, Haynes residence," she said, tucking the phone between her head and shoulder and trying to remember what she'd planned for dinner that night. Did she need to make a salad?

"Jill, it's Kim. Are you still speaking to me?"

Jill set the apples on the counter and bumped the refrigerator door closed. She leaned against the kitchen wall by the phone and sighed. "Kim. I wondered when I'd hear from you."

"Are you mad?"

"Not exactly." She sank onto the sparkling floor. The service she'd hired had sent four cleaning people over. They'd gone through the house like a plague of locusts and had finished in three hours. It would have taken her two, maybe three days.

As she closed her eyes and drew in a breath, she inhaled the scent of pine cleaner and lemon furniture polish.

Her friend sighed. "I'm really sorry. I should have told you the truth, but I knew if I did, you'd say no and then I couldn't go get married and, Jill, I feel so bad."

Amazingly, Kim got that out in one long breath. "Not bad enough," Jill said.

"So you
are
mad."

"No, but I would have liked to have known what I was getting into. Mr. Haynes thought he was hiring a full-time nanny, and I thought I was baby-sitting for a couple of nights."

"But it can't be too awful. You took the job."

"You didn't leave me a lot of choice. The poor man was desperate."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't keep apologizing. I'm not upset." She glanced around at the piles of laundry yet to be folded and the groceries she had to put away. Her gaze strayed to the clock and she realized she had to leave in less than an hour to pick up Danny and C.J. at school.

"This job might be good for me," she said slowly. "At least I don't have to worry about finding a place when you come home from your honeymoon. This job will give me time to think."

"So you don't hate me?"

"No, I don't. How was the wedding?"

"Wonderful. And the honeymoon is even better. Oh, Jill, Brian is everything I dreamed he would be. I can't believe I put off getting married to him for so long. Every day is better than the one before. He's thoughtful and tender. My heart beats faster when he comes into the room. And the sex—"

"Spare me the details," Jill said quickly. "I'll use my imagination."

Kim laughed. "Then you'd better have a good one because—"

"Kim!"

"Okay, I won't tease you anymore." Her friend was silent for a moment. "I do appreciate all you've done. Without you reminding me what was really important, I wouldn't have married Brian."

"You were there for me. When I realized I couldn't stand it anymore, you gave me a place to run to," Jill said. "I owed you. Now we're even."

"How are the boys?"

"Interesting. Very different from Patti and Heather. But I like them."

Over the phone line she heard the sound of a door opening. Kim called her husband over. There was a breath of silence, then a soft giggle.

"Sounds like you two have plans," Jill said. "I'll talk to you when you get back."

"Definitely. We want to have you over for dinner."

"Sounds great. Bye." She hung up the receiver.

Despite the bags of groceries that needed to be emptied, she sat on the floor a little longer. She envied Kim her happiness. Jill tried to remember the last time she'd been excited about a man. She had been married to Aaron for five years, but the thrill wore off very quickly. Had she expected too much, or had she sensed that he was holding back something of himself?

Funny that she never thought about leaving him. Of course, he'd gone out of his way to make her feel obligated to the girls. Maybe that was his way of making sure she was around. Sometimes she felt as if Aaron had played her the way an experienced fisherman plays with a prize bass. Reeling her in slowly, teasing her with just enough line so that the hook sank in deep.

She stood up and put away the rest of the groceries. She glanced at the clock, then made a batch of quick bread. The timer on the oven would turn the heat off at the right time, so it wouldn't overcook. Then she grabbed her purse and keys and headed out to the garage.

Five minutes later she pulled up in front of the school. She joined a long line of cars filled with mothers waiting for their children.

She watched the smiling kids run toward their parents. There hadn't been a lot of laughter in her house when she was growing up. Before the divorce, her parents had fought constantly. After the divorce, they'd spent their time thinking up ways to torment each other. Usually she was the preferred method, each parent playing her against the other. Once she'd grown up and escaped, she'd been willing to do anything to belong to a family, even turn a blind eye to Aaron's real motive for marrying her.

Before she could question her gullibility, she glanced up and saw two boys racing toward the vehicle. They were laughing, and she couldn't help but smile back.

She unlocked the car and they tumbled inside. Danny took the front seat. C.J. had had it that morning.

"How was your day?" she asked and waited until they'd put on their seat belts before starting the engine.

"Great," C.J. said. "I've got to do a science project."

"Wonderful," she thought, fighting back a groan. She had a mental picture of a pudding-filled volcano exploding in her freshly cleaned kitchen.

"What about you, Danny?"

Craig's youngest frowned. "I wanna play Pee-Wee ball, but Daddy won't practice with me. He said he would this weekend, but he was gone."

"Your father is working on something special right now. It's important for him to be gone. But he thinks about you and misses you. As soon as he can, he'll start spending more time at home." She paused, wondering if either boy would ask how she knew this bit of in formation. She didn't, exactly. She was assuming. Because Craig was a decent guy and he genuinely seemed to care about his kids.

"You don't have to practice," C.J. said. "Everyone gets on a team."

"I know." Danny blew his bangs out of his eyes. "But I don't want to be on a baby team. I wanna be good."

"Not a problem," Jill said, glancing at him. "We'll help you."

Danny made a face that said he wasn't impressed with the offer.

"I'll have you know that I'm a very good Pee-Wee ball player," she said.

C.J. looked at her and grinned. "You're lying. You've never played Pee-Wee ball."

"Well, I could if I wanted to."

Danny laughed. "You're too big."

"There's a first," she said. "Okay, maybe I haven't played Pee-Wee ball, but I can still help. Your brothers can, too. You'll see, Danny. You'll do great."

"I'll help the kid out," C.J. said. "But Ben won't. He just watches TV or plays video games after school."

Jill didn't like the sound of that. Children needed to get outside and run around. When she'd been a child, she'd often escaped outside to get away from her parents. There, in a tree house, she'd been able to pretend she was somewhere else – in a place where people cared about each other.

She turned the corner and stopped behind the school bus. It turned on its flashing red lights as children began to step down. Ben was one of the last ones off. None of the other children spoke to him as they walked away in groups of twos and threes.

Jill stared at the boy. He had his father's good looks, but he needed to lose weight. His whole body shook when he walked. She frowned, wondering if she was qualified to deal with this problem. Then she realized Ben didn't have anyone else right now. She was going to have to do her best and pray that it was enough.

When he was in the car, she signaled and pulled away from the curb.

"How was your day?" she asked brightly, glancing at him in the rearview mirror.

He looked out the side window and didn't meet her gaze. "Dumb."

"Okay." She thought for a moment, trying to plan the afternoon. It was staying lighter longer so there would be plenty of time. "What's the homework situation for everyone?"

"I don't have any," C.J. said quickly.

"Me, either," Danny piped in.

Ben didn't bother answering.

"No one has homework?" They all shook their heads. "Interesting. No homework on a Monday night. Gee, I'm very surprised. I thought everyone would have
some
homework. But if you say you don't have any, no problem."

They were all lying, she thought, fighting a grin. But she knew how to fix them. She turned on the radio and found one of those stations playing elevator music. The kind with twenty-year-old songs sung by a no-name group. She turned the radio up just loud enough to be annoying, then joined in.

Her natural inclination was to sing off-key and this time she didn't fight it. She sang right along, loudly, making up words if she didn't know them.

The boys stared at each other in disbelief. C.J. clasped his hands around his neck and made a choking sound.

"Jill?" Danny said. "Why are you singing like that?"

"Because I want to. If you don't have homework, then there's plenty of time to listen to my singing. I'm going to take the long way home."

"I've got word lists and a math page," Danny said quickly.

"Really?" she said, sounding surprised.

"I've got Spanish and history," Ben said.

She looked at C.J. in the mirror. He smiled. "Okay, maybe some math and spelling."

She clicked off the radio. "Ah, the truth at last. Okay, here's the plan. We're going to have a snack and do homework for a half hour, then we'll help Danny with his Pee-Wee tryouts. Then, if there's any homework left, it can be done after dinner."

"I don't want to," Ben said.

Jill raised her eyebrows. "Which part doesn't appeal to you?"

"Helping the pip-squeak. I'm gonna watch TV."

"But, Ben, you're the oldest. I would have thought you would want to help your brother out. Don't you play Little League?"

"Not anymore," C.J. said and puffed up his cheeks. "Lard-o is too fat."

Before she could say anything, Ben launched himself at his younger brother. C.J. grabbed him and they started wrestling together. Jill glanced at the street signs. They were only about three blocks from home, but she wanted to prove a point. She pulled to the side of the road and put the car in park.

Danny stared at her. She gave him a wink. In the back seat the boys were grunting and squirming. After a couple of minutes, Ben looked up.

"Aren't you gonna stop us?"

Jill shrugged.

C.J. looked around. "Why'd you pull over here?"

"Because you're acting like animals. It's not safe to drive with loose animals in the car. If you want to settle down, we'll go home. If not, we'll sit here. Oh, look at that girl," she said, pointing to a pretty blonde who was about ten years old. Jill rolled down the window and waved.