Parties & Potions #4 (24 page)

Don’t cry, I tell myself. Do not cry. I can’t believe what I’m about to do. I never thought I would do what I’m about to do. But I have to do it. “I can’t be your girlfriend any-more,” I say slowly.

He looks stung, like I’ve slapped him in the face. “What are you talking about? Why?”

How can I possibly explain? Should I say that it’s better for both of us if we just break up now? I can’t tell him the truth. If my own dad wants nothing to do with me, why would Raf? And what’s my other choice? Lie for the rest of my life? Get married and keep lying? Have two kids but never fully show my husband who I am? End up divorced? He deserves more than that. I deserve more than that. Adam’s right. Karin’s right. A witch and a norlock can’t work.

But what can I possibly say that will make sense to him? I look around the room for answers. I look at my witch friends, who are watching me. Waiting. Miri. Corey. Karin. Viv. Adam.

And then I say it—the only thing I know he’ll under-stand. “I’m here with someone else.”

He follows my gaze to Adam. “Oh,” he says. He takes a step back. Pulls away his arm. His face hardens. “I get it.” His voice cracks.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper again, and then, before the tears overflow, I turn my back to him and run to my friends.

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do, but It’s Easier with a Few Choice Spells

Miri immediately whisks me back home.

Raf and I are broken up.

Raf and I are broken up.

My father hates me, and Raf and I have broken up. And to add salt to my wound, when I listen to my messages, there are three from Raf, from
before.
The first two are him telling me he’s going to the concert and asking me if I can come back into the city to go too. Justin had two extra last-minute tickets. The last one is Raf at the concert. It’s a full minute of “Sixteen Shades of Love,” because Raf knows it’s one of my favorite songs.

Miri and I climb into my mom’s bed, and I sob and I sob until I am empty of tears. I can’t believe I just broke up with the sweetest guy in the world. I can’t believe I’m never going to kiss Raf again. One hundred and thirty-one kisses. That’s how many we’ve had. That’s all we’ll ever have. Yes, I kept count. What, you thought I came up with a whole formula for calculating kiss amounts and I wasn’t going to try to prove it right? Please.

But I had to break up with him. What other choice did I have?

“My,” my mom says, “you guys have certainly cleaned me out of Kleenex this weekend.”

I start laughing and crying at the same time.

“I’m hungry,” Miri says. “If I make popcorn, will you have some?”

“Yes,” my mom and I say.

I turn to my mom and sniff. “Do you think I made a mistake?”

She pats my head. “I think not wanting to be in a relationship based on lies is a very mature decision. I think you could have told him the truth. But I know that’s not an easy thing to do. Especially after your father’s reaction.”

My eyes tear up again. “You were right to begin with. You would have been better off marrying Jefferson Tyler.”

She hugs me. “Then I wouldn’t have had you guys.”

Miri returns to the room with our white popcorn bowl, the one that also doubles as a cauldron. “Don’t worry. You practically have a new boyfriend already. A warlock boy-friend. Adam already Mywitchbooked me.”

“My life is falling apart and you checked Mywitchbook?”

She pops a kernel into her mouth. “I just peeked. Don’t you want to know what he said?”

“No,” I say quickly. “Okay, maybe.”

“He asked me if you and Raf broke up.”

“Don’t tell him! I don’t want everyone to know already!” If everyone knows, then it must be true.

“I didn’t say anything to him, I swear. I told you, I just peeked!” She licks the salt off her fingers. “Do you want me to write him back?”

“No. Yes.” Is that what I want? Adam to be my new boyfriend? I know I like him as a friend, but do I like him
like that?
The thought of being with someone else, anyone else, even someone as cute as Adam, just makes me feel… blah.

I fall asleep with a hole in my heart, dreaming of Raf.

I mope around most of Sunday. I alternate between lying facedown on my bed and lying facedown on the couch. At least in the living room I can listen to (and watch with the one eye not smushed into the pillow) the TV. The Travel Channel is running an all-day marathon of
The World’s Bests.
By four o’clock I’ve seen
The World’s Best Hotels, The World’s Best Bathrooms
(Yes! People actually rank bathrooms! It must have been a witch, ’cause who else zaps her-self into so many of them?),
The World’s Best Restaurants,
and
The World’s Best Beaches.
The world’s best beach is in Greece, in case you’re interested.

At five Miri tells me we’re going out.

I lift my head up from the couch. “To where? Greece?”

“No. Lozacea.”

“But it’s Sunday,” I say.

“It’s a community center. It’s open. Karin and Viv are there studying and hanging out.”

I sigh. “I don’t feel like it.”

“Just for an hour. That’s an order.”

I stand up. “When did you get so bossy?”

We use the go spell and get zapped into the bathroom.

Miri takes the opportunity to pee, and I study my reflection. My eyes are puffy. Do I care? Not really. I feel the tears well up again, and I splash water on my face. I’m going to be fine. Absolutely fine. I did what I had to do.

My cell phone vibrates.

Raf?

I glance at the name. Adam. I pick up. “Hello?”

“What’s going on, friend?” he asks.

I let out a low laugh. “Not much.”

“You left last night in a bit of a hurry.”

“No kidding.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

I look away from the mirror. “Not so much. Hey, how did you get my number? I don’t remember giving it to you.”

“I’m a warlock. I can get anything,” he says. “So, where are you now? At home?”

“Actually, I’m at Lozacea.”

“Seriously? Me too. I’m in the game room. Viv and Karin just left me to practice their candle spells. Come be my pool partner?”

“Where is the game room?” How many rooms does this place have?

“Make a left after the caf and then walk until you see a red door. Knock three times and say,
‘Balio.’

“Okay. We’ll be there in two.” Hopefully. If I find it. I hang up as Miri flushes and then joins me in front of the mirror. I wag my finger disapprovingly. “You did not tell me Adam was here.”

She feigns innocence. “I didn’t? Fine, you got me. Viv may have mentioned he was here studying. Or pretending to study.”

He
is
cute. And sweet. And funny. And a warlock. Could I like him as more than a friend?

Miri goes to find the girls, and I search for, and then find, the game room.

“Welcome,” Adam says.

I look around. Ping-Pong. Foosball. Checkers. Monopoly. Adam, looking kind of cute, racking up a pool table. I clear my throat and say, “These games seem kind of ordinary.”

“What did you expect?” Adam asks. “Quidditch?”

I force myself to laugh. “You’d think witches would have
some
sort of magical sport.”

His eyes crinkle. “Wanna race brooms?”

I lean against the table. “Brooms are so last year.”

“Chicken?”

The word
chicken
makes me think of General Tso chicken, which makes me think of Raf, and my heart stops. Great. Now I’ll never be able to eat my favorite dish ever again. “No,” I say. “Definitely not.” I push the thought of Raf away and pick up a pool cue. “What would you want to race for? Broom ownership?”

“Ha. How about these terms. If I win …” He pauses.

“If you win what? The race or the game of pool?”

“Either,” he says. “If I win either one, you be my date for my Simsorta next weekend.”

I almost drop my cue. “Oh. But—”

“Don’t ‘but’ me. Just as a friend. I promise I won’t try to make out with you again. Unless you want me to.” He gives me an exaggerated wink. “But honestly, my parents keep bugging me about why I’m not bringing a date, and if I don’t bring somebody, I’m going to have to dance with my mom for the first dance. You can’t make me do that. Please. Save me.” He looks up at me. “Unless your boyfriend doesn’t want you to.”

I shake my head. Guess Miri really didn’t tell him. “Raf and I broke up.”

He cocks his head. “I wondered what was up last night.…” He raises an eyebrow. “How are you?”

Must not cry. Must not cry. I force myself to shrug. “I’m fine. It was the right decision.” I think. I hope. “It’s too hard to be with someone I can’t be honest with, you know?”

“Yeah,” he says. “I do.”

For a second, neither of us speaks. We hear laughter from outside.

“So does that mean you’ll be my date? As a friend?” He gives me a hopeful smile.

I have an idea. “I’ll tell you what. Forget the race and the pool game. Let’s make a deal. I’ll be your friend-date this week—”

“Deal!”

“If next week you’ll be mine.”

He smiles. “Now, those are my kind of terms.”

I don’t see Raf all day on Monday.

Some would call it luck, but I would call it the avoiding spell, which I found on page 376 of the spell book. It casts an orange hue fifty feet around him that only I can see. Best way to keep tabs on an ex
ever.
Or someone you’re stalking. Not that I’m advocating stalking. ’Cause everyone knows that’s bad. But no matter what it’s used for, I’m going to have to find out which witch made that one up and give her some serious kudos.

I tell Tammy the breakup news that morning in home-room.

“But I don’t understand!” Tammy cries after her jaw literally hit the desk in shock. Fine, not literally, but her mouth really did fall open at the news. “How could you break up? You guys were crazy about each other!”

Now what am I supposed to say? Because I’m a witch and he isn’t? Because it’ll never work? “We were just in different places,” I say.

“What are you talking about? What different places? You two are in the same place! Here!”

“It’s complicated,” I say, my head starting to pound.

“This isn’t about the fashion show, is it?” she asks, fore-head wrinkled in confusion.

“No, it’s just…” What am I supposed to tell her? I can give her the same untrue explanation that I gave Raf—that it’s because of Adam. But Tammy would wonder why I’ve never mentioned Adam. She’d ask how I met this Adam. She’d want to meet this Adam. “You know what? I don’t really want to talk about it.”

I feel her eyes boring into me. “But I’m your best friend! You have to talk about it.”

“Tammy, I can’t.” My throat closes up. There are so many things I wish I could tell her. About Raf, about the Sam, about Adam, about my dad. My dad, who we still haven’t heard from. Two days and no phone call.

Tammy would understand. Her parents are divorced too, and she would know just what to say. She always does. But how can I trust her? Sure, she’s my best friend today, but what about tomorrow? She broke up with Bosh. What’s stopping her from breaking up with me? What if I had confided in Jewel? She might have told the whole school by now. I can’t tell Tammy. I just can’t. The tears threaten to spill onto my cheeks, so I turn away from her to wipe them.

I feel her arms around my back, hugging me. “I’m so sorry. You talk to me whenever you’re ready to. I’m always here for you, you got it? Always.”

I nod and blink my tears away.