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Authors: J. Minter

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BOOK: Pass It On
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“That's the one,” Fiona Flood said, and there was an edge to her voice. She sounded extremely pointed and gossipy.

The bankers looked away. Arno watched. Even his own dad seemed to glare slightly at Jonathan before helping himself to more Camembert and crackers. The huge living room was quiet except for the weird harp music that was playing in the background. A log crackled in the fireplace and a spark flew out, past the grate, and onto the Aubusson rug. Jonathan jumped over and stamped it out. Arno watched in utter confusion as no
one thanked him.

“What are you two doing for dinner?” Allie asked. She'd come back into the room with a full glass of wine.

“I guess we're not eating with you all,” Arno said, suddenly totally annoyed at his parents and everybody else for being such assholes. So what if Jonathan was staying over for a few days because his mom was a loon and had split town while she was having their apartment painted? And whatever about his dad—what were they even talking about? Fuck them. He'd been totally mellow only five minutes ago, enjoying the relative warmth and safety of his own living room, and now his mom and dad had messed it up all over again. He really wondered what he was going to do with the two of them.

“We're going to smoke up some heroin in my room and watch sadomasochistic porn,” Arno said. “You know, chase the dragon and then wag its tail?”

“Very funny, darling,” Allie said. “Now get along, you two. On to your mischief.”

No one had even offered Jonathan a glass of wine. Arno scratched his head. He didn't get it.

“Okay,” Arno shrugged. “See you.”

Arno walked out of the room without looking back at his parents or their guests, and Jonathan followed.

They went down to Arno's wing, padding quietly
down the hall.

“Your dad had on velvet shoes with foxes on them.”

“I know. My dad is so gay.”

“You know—” Jonathan pulled up short and stared at Arno. Arno stared back.

“What?” Arno asked.

“He really is,” Jonathan said.

Arno said nothing. They reached his room and he grabbed some fifty-dollar bills from a silver bowl on his desk.

“I was kidding.”

“What?” Arno asked.

“About your dad—I didn't mean it.”

“Oh. Right—anyway, I don't care. They're being assholes for some reason I don't get. It's like, lately I hate my house. Let's get the hell out of here.”

david is good at football, too

Wednesday was a bright fall day. The sky was an incredible blue and it was a perfect, bracing fifty degrees. With just a week before Thanksgiving, each day that could be enjoyed outside felt like a little gift, and everyone in the city seemed to know it.

Because of the weather, after school David and Mickey made their way to the baseball diamonds in Central Park, where they were going to play football.

It was a weekly game and whoever showed up played. David was always a quarterback because he had laser accuracy and an incredible ability to throw the bomb, and Mickey liked to be a lineman so he could grab guys and wrestle the ball away from them. They hadn't talked since David called Mickey and told him about how Jonathan wasn't supposed to invite them all on the trip, which David was currently wishing he hadn't done, since Mickey seemed very, very on edge.

“I mean, I kind of can't believe Jonathan,” Mickey said. He kept shaking his head and looking around. “I
sort of feel like he lied to me, you know.”

“I know.” And David did know. The trip was nothing, but the more he thought about Jonathan's dad stealing that money, the more he wondered if Jonathan knew about it all and was just taking him sailing to keep him quiet about the whole thing. “He and Arno said they were going to come a little later.”

“Oh yeah? If they show up, I'll give you twenty bucks,” Mickey said. “I love those guys, but they suck at sports, especially team sports.”

“I think they're just planning to watch.”

“That's lame.”

They walked quietly for a moment. They were both wearing sweatshirts, running shoes, and wind-pants, so they made loud swishing noises while they walked. David had a football stuffed in his kangaroo pocket. He looked pregnant. They sipped steaming coffee from paper cups.

“Really fucking lame,” Mickey said.

“Hey,” David said. “What's the matter? Maybe it's a big misunderstanding and he really did mean to invite you instead of me. Or maybe he's ditching both of us and he picked Arno instead. And we don't even know if he invited Patch.”

Mickey kicked at some pebbles in the horse path. “Yeah, maybe.”

But David didn't like the sound of that any more than Mickey did.

They arrived at the baseball diamonds and waved at the ten kids who were already there, throwing around footballs and tackling each other. One kid, clearly hungover, was dry-heaving into a bush. Another had already twisted his ankle and was lying on his side, moaning. A few girls were there to play, too. The group of footballers approached them. Mickey and David tossed their coffee cups into a trash can.

“Mickey's got to be on my team,” David said to the group. “I don't want this crazy monkey sacking my butt every time I get a snap.”

Immediately, a guy from Collegiate named Roman called for Mickey, and Mickey went on the team that wasn't David's.

“I want you!” Mickey yelled and pointed at David. He started hopping up and down and barking. “I'm Ray Lewis and I am going to bury your sorry ass in the dirt!”

“Great.” David looked around and saw Jonathan and Arno coming toward the field. They were late, and everyone watched them approach. They were both in long black overcoats, crewneck sweaters, and loafers.

“I have Arno,” Roman yelled. “Not the other one.”

“We're not playing,” Jonathan called out.

“What're you, cheerleaders? Fuck that!” Alex Turner screamed. He was Mickey's team's captain. “I got Arno.”

Everybody on David's team was quiet. That meant they had Jonathan.

David watched Arno and Jonathan confer for a moment, and then Jonathan jogged over to David. They nodded at each other.

“Can I stay at your house tonight?” Jonathan asked. “I've had about enough of Arno's.”

“Of course you can.” But David knew his voice was stiff.

They set up to play, and on first down, David lobbed one out to Jonathan, who did his best to catch the ball. David watched as the ball spiraled and then he saw Jonathan seem to tug it down from the sky. Then everyone stared in complete surprise, as Jonathan brought the ball down and cradled it in his scrawny arms. Mickey launched himself at Jonathan just as he began to run. And Jonathan went down, the ball squirting out of his hands and bouncing away. Mickey and Jonathan landed on the grass.

“Wow,” Jonathan said, “I forgot you were allowed to do that!” He tried to laugh as he struggled to his feet, and then extended a hand to Mickey.

“Yeah,” Mickey said. “I love to come right at the guy
with the ball—I'm really upfront and honest that way. No lies here.”

“Okay,” Jonathan said. Mickey looked at Jonathan and saw that he was totally confused. They jogged away from each other, and Jonathan caught Arno giving Mickey a “what the hell, dude, you know Jonathan is fragile” look.

They played a few more downs, and then everyone was huffing and out of breath. Jonathan was bent over, still, from when Mickey had taken him out.

“Let's go!” Alex Turner screamed. Everyone looked at him. He was really into the game. Just then Froggy came up in a brand-new Giants football jersey.

“I want in.” Froggy pranced around, and started pointing at Arno, because he wanted to get back at him for breaking his parents' bed.

“You can have my spot,” Jonathan said. “I've got to make a phone call. See you guys later. David, I'll be at your house around seven or eight.”

Jonathan was already walking away before anyone could stop him. David, Mickey, and Arno watched him go. They turned around and looked at the remaining players. Froggy grabbed the ball and ran with it, and then flipped onto the grass.

“Is he trying to tackle himself?” David asked. While they watched, a knife fell out of Froggy's pocket. He
stood up and hid it, and bounced up and down, staring at Arno. While Froggy screamed at Arno, everyone stared at the smear of dog shit he'd gotten on his khakis.

“Can you imagine getting stabbed to death playing pick-up football?” Arno asked. “I don't think I want to play anymore.”

“Everybody in position!” Alex Turner screamed. He grabbed the ball and torpedoed it at David, who caught it with one hand and shot it back.

“We're done for the day,” David said. But when he looked around, Arno was already gone. David called out to Mickey and they walked toward the park exit together.

“Somebody should call Jonathan and make sure he's okay,” Mickey said. “I really creamed his ass.”

“Don't worry. I'm going to see him for dinner.” David smiled, and the two waved their cell phones at each other.

Mickey was already calling Philippa. So David speed-dialed Amanda. But then he pressed END when he remembered that he was supposed to be getting secretly engaged to her, and he punched in Risa's number instead.

arno's got a problem

“If my best friend did that, I'd chop his balls off.” Liesel said and laughed heartily, her voice jumping up and down multiple octaves.

“It's not a joke,” Arno said, and to console himself, he slid his hand along Liesel's naked thigh. He thought it might be the softest and warmest part of her. They were in his bathroom, in his apartment, sitting side by side on the marble bench in his big glass-enclosed shower. It was early evening, and they were both draped over with towels and drinking some herbal tea that the Wildenburgers' cook had made for them and left by the door.

“I mean, really,” Liesel said. “He stayed at your house and invited you on vacation but then you find out that actually he's bringing someone else!”

Arno had just explained to her as much as he knew about what was going on with Jonathan, all of which he'd heard from Mickey, who had called on his way to do homework at Philippa's. Mickey had told Arno a
garbled version of what he knew since he was feeling bad, both about tackling Jonathan and the nasty look Arno had given him, so he wanted to explain why he had been so fired up during the game.

Arno knew Liesel was maybe not the perfect person to tell problems to… but then again, she was supposed to be his girlfriend. Arno closed his eyes. But then he opened them, because he was just beginning to understand that listening to Liesel without seeing how gorgeous she was, was a very bad idea.

“I need to go home and study,” Liesel said suddenly. “You're so naughty, making me act all crazy on a weekday, when I should be home! Everyone was right about you. I have to get out of here. You are so good-looking!”

She kissed him, and for a moment, he felt himself get excited. Then he shrugged her away.

“Man, you change subjects quickly,” he said.

“What do you mean?” Liesel asked. “Were we talking about something interesting before?”

“I just want Jonathan to tell me what's going on. And if stuff was normal and his dad wasn't getting remarried right now, then maybe we would just wrestle and like, get it all out. But Mickey made me swear that I wouldn't say anything to him.”

“Um, right. I remember when my parents had some friends who got in all this trouble for using the money
from the company they owned together to finance their personal lives. My parents cut them off quicker than you can say ‘Jack Spratt.' That's how my dad put it. I know it's old-fashioned, but my family doesn't like it when people do things that get them in the papers. Anyway, this couple had a daughter and I never saw her again. I heard they moved to New Jersey and now she goes to public school.”

“How is that related to anything? Do you mean you think I should cut Jonathan off because he might bring someone else on this awesome vacation instead of me?” Arno wondered for just a moment if Leisel knew something that Arno didn't.

“I don't know!” Liesel laughed. The sound was braying, and for a moment her nostrils flared. “Sometimes I hear things, but oh well!”

He was glad the bathroom was steamy because he didn't want her to see his totally confused expression.

“Arno?”

They both stood stock still. Through the Liars CD, which was playing plenty loudly in Arno's room, they'd heard Arno's mother's voice calling.

“Yeah, Mom.”

“Dinner! Does your friend want to stay?”

“Now I really have to go,” Liesel said as she stood up and dropped the towel. Arno's jaw dropped. She was
incredible. Too thin, but still incredible.

“I think she's going to go home,” Arno said through the door. He stared at Liesel, who was struggling into a silvery-pink bra.

“If you stare too long you'll turn to stone.” She giggled, and leaned down and kissed him. Then she sprinted out of the steamy bathroom. Arno followed her, and they dressed quickly.

“Being with you is so fucking
outrageous
.” Liesel laughed and looked around for the rest of her clothes. “You are so much more fun than all those rigid uptown boys I've been with!”

“Yeah,” Arno said. “Hey, do you want to meet my mom?”

“Are you crazy? We barely know each other—what do you think I want to do, marry you?” Liesel started laughing uncontrollably and threw herself on the bed. And all of a sudden, Arno thought,
hey, I think I kind of like this girl. I don't get her at all, but I like her.

one-on-one with david

Amanda called David and his phone vibrated. David saw her name and jumped in the air.

BOOK: Pass It On
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