Patch 17 (Realm of Arkon) (40 page)

"I'm concerned about something else entirely—didn't you find anything odd?"

"You mean the greeting?" Max looked at Luffy questioningly. "Duh, he sees the likes of us all the time. What's the point of running off at the mouth for each one?"

"Are you trying to tell me you've never played these games before?"

"Nope. I had no time for it, although now it dawns on me that I probably should have."

"You see, in games like this the whole world revolves around the players, so the druid was supposed to have greeted us properly, but he... And what he said about where we came from—he should have uttered none of that, don't you get it? None of that!"

"Could the NPCs have come to life after the latest patch?" Max suggested.

"It sure looks that way, and what it means is that we're the ones who have to watch our tongues now. I'm surprised he didn't squash us like bugs."

"So what," the warrior made a dismissive gesture. "We're immortal, aren't we? So what if he did squash us? I'd level up to 200 and then come back here and squash him—or, at least, take his antlers as a trophy."

"You really believe anyone can level up to 200 with this twenty percent penalty for dying?"

"I have no doubt."

"Heh," Luffy sighed theatrically. "I wish I had your certainty."

It didn't take them long to find Immalah the Herbalist. It was a short and thin elf, who, oddly enough, seemed overjoyed at their arrival. He rummaged in a hollow that must have served as a tool shed, gave the companions two wooden shovels, led them to the site, outlined their tasks and went away, humming some melodious tune.

"Two hundred bucks, is it," exhaled Luffy, resting his hands on the handle of the spade that he had driven into the ground and eyeing the dark patch with the rough area of three hundred square feet. "Not half bad. Chinese workers probably get around that much for tilling two and a half acres by hand."             

"Chinese workers get tired," muttered a slightly embarrassed Max, "whereas we happen to be in a magical world."

"But there are usually ten of them digging."

"Which means each of them gets five times less. Besides, labor brings out the best in a person."

"Whereas idleness makes one happy!"

"Enough yapping already. If you call yourself a hero, put your money where your mouth is," Max chuckled and set forth toward the patch pointed out to him by the herbalist, the shovel over his shoulder.

***

"I still say this is a great place," Max took a sip of wine from a simple wooden chalice, inhaled the smoke with gusto and gave the nearby sorcerer, who was contemplating the motley birds swimming in the lake, a gentle shove. "You're overcome by melancholy again?"

Luffy took a suspicious look at the vessel in his hand, downed the contents in a single gulp, and stretched out on the grass, folding his hands behind his head.

"I should stop lying to myself," he said sullenly. "The phone is silent, her mother isn't picking up, either, and when I called her friend, she got so scared she nearly soiled herself."

"Well, she's doing all right, at least," said Max philosophically. "And so are you, by the way. This 'doing all right' thing may not involve the two of you being together, but she isn't the last woman alive, is she?"

"A month ago, when they'd just brought me back from the hospital, I told her she was free right away. We wouldn't have starved, but who needs a guy with no legs? Why did she have to stay with me? Why lie?" The young man sat up in agitation and looked to the side with anger in his eyes. "They brought the capsules a week ago—you have to order them well in advance where I come from. We thought we could spend time here... Then this nightmare of a 'departure'—a neighbor died together with his son, right in their capsules... Then Alex called his mother, and she followed. Can you imagine?" The mage picked the chalice up from the grass and handed it to Max. "And then she calls me—this neighbor woman, I mean—and asks me to look after the apartment until their relatives arrive, and to call the coroner. It took me less than five minutes to decide... Xenia agreed to it, too—we had no kids, after all. But why did she have to lie to me?!"

"You're a fool, brother," Max shook his head. "You lived with an amazing woman. Remember her and be grateful she didn't leave you when you were down in the dumps... Let's drink to her."

"You're a real spoilsport, Max. Whenever there's a serious conversation, you sidetrack it, and I have nothing to counter with... Forget it. May she be happy and in good health," the young man finished his wine in a single gulp and stretched out on the grass again. "Thanks," he said after a while.

"For what exactly?"

"For hearing me out..."

They finished digging late at night, having tilled the entire stretch of land. When the herbalist, whom they woke up in the middle of the night banging at his door, gave them their gold, they instantly leveled to three. Immalah mumbled, "Why can't some people just sleep the night away?" as he taught them their first profession by pressing his palm against their foreheads. Then he gave them a thin notebook containing descriptions of the Sunlit Forest flora.

The companions spent the next three days running around the woods. Alisha, a pretty young elven maid who also turned out to be a herbalist, gave them about a dozen quests at once, all of which involved gathering local flowers and herbs. The stocky and somewhat beast-like druid tasked them with cutting off pestilential burls growing on some trees—he called those blighted fungi. Finally, by the morning of the fourth day, the friends had eradicated the source of the pestilence, which was an enormous mossy tree stump. They reported to Artainor, and then headed back to Mentor Almaren, cursing the entire local flora in low voices.

There were substantially more people once they returned, and they had to spend eight hours in line before they could register the quest as completed, all the while listening to news from the outside world. The news was unremarkable, however—all the developments were expected. The panic and the hype were growing by the minute. The death of over thirty million people drowned out all other reports of current events and was discussed on every channel and all over the Internet. Several governments had already implemented limits on capsule usage while scientists discussed whether or not the Realm of Arkon could be considered a separate reality. Most people, however, didn't care much at all. Parents followed their children and vice versa. Many of those who couldn't find a place for themselves in the world had migrated, as well as the terminally ill, adventurers and thrill-seekers. Capsules skyrocketed in price and soon became impossible to find. One man claimed to have bought his for eight hundred grand. But the weirdest thing was that the same capsule could only be used by close relatives to leave one after another. Therefore, a mass exodus into this world wasn't likely to happen anytime soon.

"Salutations, heroes," said Almaren in a strange voice as he rose to greet them. "I bid you welcome to my humble abode..."

"You're trolling me, aren't you?" Luffy looked at him suspiciously.

"Just a tiny bit," the druid grinned. "However, I'm truly grateful to you for the awakening of the soil."

"Soil is all nice and good," muttered Luffy while examining a plain-looking wooden staff—his quest reward. "But we really didn't expect we'd have to spend three days gathering a comprehensive collection of herbs and flowers," he grunted, satisfied by the visual examination.

"Oh, so it's hunting that you're after?" The druid shook his head in reproach. "Well, that's easy enough." He settled into his armchair, produced a blank scroll and started to write something on it...

You've accessed the quest: The Majordomo of Venlamin.

Quest type: normal.

Find Majordomo Diplexius in Venlamin and deliver the message from Mentor Almaren to him.

Reward: experience.

"The Brown Hills are overcome with packs of rats—they feed on the bark and the soft heartwood of young trees," he explained to Max as he gave him the scroll. "Certain events that have transpired lately have made me focus on something else entirely. A week ago, Majordomo Diplexius asked me to send him a few hunters to destroy the pesky rodents. I have no free hunters at the moment, but the two of you should be able to handle the task without much trouble."

"Kill a beaver! Save a tree!" Max looked at Almaren, holding the two-handed sword received as a reward for completing the quest on his shoulder for want of a sheath.

"Something along those lines," nodded the druid. "You get the drift, but note that wood rats are a bit larger than beavers. Good hunting, heroes," the druid waved the companions farewell. "We're unlikely to meet again here—on the mainland, perhaps, two years later, when my service here is done. One more thing—I come from the Wood Moose clan and consider it a great honor to be compared to that animal. You should bear that in mind, young warrior..."

"There's a place that's a lot like this one near Kiev, right next to the village of Rovzhi. When I was a student, we would spend nearly every weekend there during the summer." There was a hint of nostalgia in Luffy's voice. "The pines are just like the ones here, and the shore is just as steep. This puddle is a far cry from the Kiev Reservoir, of course, but..."

"I can't remember the last time I went fishing," Max replied in the same vein. "There should be someone here who teaches the fishing skill—we should definitely find them tomorrow."

"Don't you ever feel horrified when you think all of it is gone forever? After all, we're basically walking corpses, you and I."

"Cut the crap," Max took his eyes away from the players splashing in the lake a hundred feet away and frowned at the mage. "How the hell are we walking corpses? As for beautiful places, I'm sure there are lots more of them here than back there."

"But how is that relevant?" Luffy sighed. "There may be more beautiful places, but none of them feel like home..."

"You're at it again, are you?"

"Don't mind me—I get this way when I've had a few," the mage shook his head. "Still, it's a good thing we came here instead of staying at the inn... those drunken mugs depress me."

"Remember the movie that came out recently—
The Final Day
, or whatever it was called? With another asteroid heading for collision with the Earth? They really partied hard there, knowing the end was nigh, didn't they? But why would you do it here? Did you notice that only one person in ten or so is actually doing something useful? The elves are supposed to be one of the evolved races." Max looked at the drunk elven maidens screaming and splashing each other, and then his glance fell on the chalice in his hand. "At least they can't remove their undies in a noob zone. Thank goodness. I shudder to imagine what would happen here otherwise."

"You're a snob, brother," Luffy snorted. "Why do you care? The two of us aren't all that sober, either."

"I don't like seeing people behave like animals, is all. As for us, a bottle and a half each is a ridiculous amount. Also, we've been working like beasts of burden for three days straight—we deserve it." He rose in a single fluid motion. "Shall we go? The moon is out already."

"Let's—it's high time we had some proper sleep. I'm sick of camping out in the woods."

"Don't forget you're an elf—they're supposed to sleep up in trees, aren't they?" Max shot over his shoulder.

"Let monkeys sleep up in trees," Luffy dusted his pants and followed. "But think how convenient this is—there are ten rooms tops in the inns, and they can house a hundred—and everyone gets a room of their own, unless they invite someone over. This hotel owner lady—the one that looks thirty at the age of sixty-something, what's her name..."

"Paris Hilton?"

"That's the one. Imagine what she could have paid for someone implementing that IRL..."

"Like I care! We're not IRL anymore," Max turned over as they approached the massive door of the inn, with the din of inebriated patrons coming from inside. "At seven in the morning, right here," he pointed to the ground with his finger. "Tomorrow's gonna be a hectic day—don't you dare oversleep."

"Worry about your own oversleeping," the mage grunted. "Let's get going before I pass out right here," he nodded at the bodies piled up next to the entrance, wincing at the smell of vomit, "right next to these folks..."

"You have drunk ten times less, although you can surely try if you want," Max smiled, and the companions entered the inn.

Max found it really hard to fall asleep that night. He never slept well in a new place, and now his unease was compounded by the wine and all sorts of uneasy thoughts coming to his mind. How would Alyona react to his arrival? What if she'd already found someone? What would he need to do to find her in the first place if she never checked her mail? Everything had seemed easy enough initially—log into the game, send a private message, and wait for the answer. But on the very first day it turned out that after the patch, which took place less than a week ago, the only way of reaching someone was by mail. It was impossible to send mail to the mainland from Sunlit Forest, so he'd have to wait until he got out of here.