Perfectly Flawed (15 page)

Clutching her glass of Coke like it were an anchor in a storm, Adrianna went back to the family room that was now crowded with people. The lights were dimmed and it took a minute for her eyes to adjust. There was a jump rope game she’d played as a child where two ropes are going at the same time in opposite directions, and the trick was to find the right time to jump in. That was how she felt—like she needed a place to jump in but could find none.

She spotted Samuel over by the music system adjusting the volume—up, of course. In a sea of strangers, Adrianna was ill at ease. Casually, she walked over to say hello. After whispering a few pleasantries and making some music requests, Adrianna turned to face the crowd.

Everyone seemed involved, laughing, talking, and motioning dramatically with their hands. They were having fun. That was what Adrianna should be doing. She hoped the dancing would start soon so she could get lost in the music and forget that she was so out of place. Thankful that at least that the lights were low, making it easier not to be seen, she wound her way through the packed room, out to the hall. She needed some air.

Chapter 19

Away from the claustrophobia of the crowded room, Adrianna felt a little better. She walked down the familiar hallway, making her way outside to the patio. Stepping through the open door, she noticed
Cari had everything set up for guests out there too. Trays of food were strategically placed on a long table under the covered porch.

Some partiers had migrated to the lower deck; the weather was pleasant so it was nice to be out. Beyond the flagstone patio was a long lap pool, with the light on, turning the water a vibrant blue. Many times Adrianna had come over to lie in the sun on the padded lounges, and talk about everything with her friend. It had been a sort of reprieve from pressures at home.

Cari’s house was warm, the atmosphere relaxed. The huge built-in barbecue brought back memories of get-togethers throughout their time in high school. Grilling burgers, mounds of potato salad, and dill pickles—one of Adrianna’s favorites. The aroma seemed ever present under the redwood patio awning, such was the vividness of those earlier times.

All along the back wall were planters filled with thriving vines and shrubs. Adrianna’s favorite was the one starting to bloom tiny blue flowers, indicating spring had arrived; blue-cloud,
Cari called it. Going down the steps and around the pool, Adrianna sat on one of the low wooden benches and touched the delicate flowers. Beyond the wall, the treetops of Boston Common looked like a black mass, and the financial district buildings rose into the sky, illuminated by the city lights.

More people were making it out to the patio. Music came on—Samuel must have flipped the switch, because music started to play through the speakers mounted under the patio cover, around the pool, and even in the ground. Adrianna had always loved the outdoor music feature, and frequently
Cari had cranked up the volume when they were alone. When Adrianna had a home of her one that was one thing she was definitely going to include.

A group of people drifted down to the sunken fire-pit area, drinking and talking. The fire was blazing though not really needed, but it did add to the atmosphere.
Cari appeared in the doorway, carrying a tray of drinks, and gracefully navigated the stairs to the pit. Chatting and smiling, she offered her wares to her friends. If she was going to be running around all evening serving, she’d be worn out. But Adrianna suspected that Lana would be there with her small maid service crew to take over and to clean up afterwards. Lana was a regular at the parties.

Adrianna sipped her Coke and shivered when a light breeze blew over her, momentarily chilling the pleasant evening. She watched
Cari go back inside. The garden and patio lights made it easy to see, though subtle enough to not ruin the ambiance.

Semi-hidden out by the back wall, watching, Adrianna noted that the party was pretty tame as far as college parties went. Maybe the classy tone
Cari set had subdued everyone, or maybe it was early and things hadn’t gotten started yet.

It was hard being one of the few—sometimes the only one—who didn’t drink. As the evening ramped up, conversations got less discernible, and as a non-drinker, Adrianna often felt that the others spoke a language she didn’t understand. But she really did. It was not that she’d never been drunk; it was that not drinking at a college party was awkward. She didn’t fit in.

Two couples came out and looked around for friends. Smiling, they made their way to where a group sat packed around a wooden table. How many people had Cari invited?

Just behind them, Tomas entered.
Alaina hadn’t mentioned that he was coming; maybe she didn’t know. At least he was a friendly face. Adrianna stood to go over and say hello but stopped short.

Right behind him a handsome face appeared.
Sean
. Followed by the other guy he hung out with, the Italian. Oh God. Now what? Should she bolt? There was nowhere to go. The only way out was around the pool, in Sean’s direct view. Her heart fluttered and she stopped breathing.

She watched Sean greet several people who knew him, giving a high five to one of them. He looked so relaxed and confident, everything she wasn’t. And how did he know so many people there? The friendliness she’d experienced from him was not in short supply. You’d think everyone was his best friend the way he was kidding around, laughing, and making his way unhurriedly through the crowd.

Then Sean looked out at the pool and saw her. His expression revealed nothing, or if it did, it was too dark to see. God, he must hate her after the other day. Adrianna was glued to the spot, too horrified to move, unsure what to do. After saying something to his buddy, Sean walked in her direction.

He wore tight black jeans and a soft white cotton T-shirt. His short hair was combed but naturally a bit messy. With his casual gait and his muscles flexing as he walked, Adrianna viewed him as a sexy predator. She felt a little dizzy.

Sean stood in front of her and Adrianna gawked.

“Nice dress,” he said, as if his being at the party was expected.

“Why is it that everywhere I go, you’re there?” The rude comment spilled out before Adrianna could stop herself. She was tied up in knots of contradictions. The effect Sean had on her was powerful and her need surfaced despite her determination to hide it.

“I like being around you.” Sean’s eyes gleamed, the deep color rich in the subdued outdoor lighting.

There is was again. The honesty. To Sean, it was all so simple. He’d said he liked her and wanted to be with her. Simple. Why couldn’t he understand it wasn’t that simple for her?

Sean took a sip of his beer.

“Your eye looks better.” Seated, with Sean’s waist about eye level, Adrianna purposefully looked
up at him
to avoid looking where she really wanted to.

Sean shrugged. “It doesn’t bother me.” He glanced at the long bench, turned, and sat down beside her.

“Did I say you could?”

“What?”

“Sit by me?”

“Nope.”

His warm body blocked the coolness of the evening; his rock-hard thigh rested next to hers. A light fragrance of cologne and body wash wafted over and aroused her.

“So, why were you having Tomas ask his sister about me?”

Sean looked over, his expression serious. “You know about that?”

“Of course.
Friends don’t keep secrets.”

“Then we aren’t friends?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You have secrets from me.” Even in the low light, she could see the look in his eyes. He was being sincere—exactly what Adrianna had no idea how to deal with.

“So. Who says I have to tell
you
everything.”

“I say.” Sean didn’t look away. “I think you need to. Whatever it is you think you’re doing, you’re making a mistake.”

“Kevin? Is that what you’re referring to?” Adrianna lifted her chin, challenging him to question her choices.

Sean gulped his beer then looked back. “Yes, Kevin.”

Adrianna didn’t say anything.

“And is he going to show up here, like he did at the coffee shop?”

“No,” Adrianna said, insulted. “I didn’t even know you were going to be here tonight, so I seriously doubt that’s my plan.”

“It was fairly effective the other day.”

“Sean, that part was a mistake. How was I to know you’d come running after me? Suddenly, there you were.”

“You could have told me.”

“What? Like: ‘Hi, Sean—by the way, I’m meeting Kevin so can you say what you need to and move on’? Something like that?”

“No, you wouldn’t have had to say it like that. But you could have clued me in. Instead, you made a fool out of me.”

“I didn’t mean to.” Why did Adrianna feel like she was always apologizing?

“So you’re dating him again?”

“No. Not that it’s any of your business.”

“You meet at coffee shops for non-dates?”

“Ooh, Sean, you are so…maddening sometimes.”

Sean stared at her, and for a fleeting second Adrianna thought he was going to kiss her.

“Adrianna.” Sean’s tone changed, and his bicep bunched like he wanted to reach out but didn’t.

Adrianna looked away, annoyance clouded out by sensations she seemed unable to control. Weakness flooded her body, and she feared looking into Sean’s eyes would be dangerous right then.

“I’m not seeing Kevin right now,” she said, keeping her eyes on the glimmering pool water. “He wanted to apologize for what happened the other night.”

“The roses weren’t enough?” Sean’s caustic comment hung in the air between them.

Adriana thought of countering but didn’t. “He came to say he was sorry, in person.”

“He’s not sorry, Adrianna. I know guys like that.”

“Sean, I’m not saying it makes everything okay. All right?” She looked up. Sean watched her intently. “I’m just saying that he wanted to talk about it. So we talked.”

“And?”
Sean asked in a quiet voice.

Adrianna looked into his eyes, overwhelmed by the feeling that consumed her. An urge to wrap her arms around him and press her mouth to his soft lips rose within her. She was unable to look away, or to ignore the attraction. “And…I’m here with you.”

Sean touched her cheek.

“He wants to keep seeing me. But I didn’t agree to that.”

The pool, the music, the partying crowd seemed to disappear. There, seated by the planter with leaves brushing against her shoulder and the dull city lights sparkling behind her, Adrianna was in a world apart. Only Sean existed. The radiant pool light enhanced his handsome face and his lips begged to be kissed.

Sean lost his hand in her hair and pulled her closer, touching his soft lips to hers. His breath smelled of beer—just one more aphrodisiac to her. Everything about him was a turn-on. Male pheromones engulfed her, drugging her, and Adrianna couldn’t have said no, even if she’d wanted to.

The kiss was long and sweet. Adrianna kissed back, glad to be with him, wanting his affection. Whatever had gone on before she couldn’t recall. There was only now. And there was only Sean. His fingers stroked her back, and the tenderness nearly made her cry. She’d never had anyone be so good to her.

Nor had she ever felt the way she did around Sean. Before, with other men, she’d felt like she was pretending. But this was real.
Very real. The feel of him swamped all her senses. All Adrianna could feel was his strong hand against her back and his wet tongue caressing hers. All she could taste was him, the beer mingled with Sean’s own flavor. All she could smell was the maleness of him.

When he pulled back from the kiss, Sean held her, pressing her cheek to his. No words were spoken. In the silence, the emotion that radiated between them said it all. The attraction she’d fought now blossomed into a heady ecstasy, and Adrianna dared not move, not wanting to break the spell.

Sean had set his beer aside long before, and now, with his palms on her cheeks, he kissed her again. Adrianna felt as if she could kiss him forever; there was no desire to stop. The more he kissed her, the more she wanted. There was no way to get enough, not of Sean. Wrapped in the sensuality of the encounter, excitement mounted.

Leaning back, Sean had a look in his eyes that melted her. A bout of shyness surfaced and Adrianna shifted on the wooden bench that she hadn’t even felt underneath her until then. Unsure and suddenly awkward, she ran her hand through her hair and stood. Her legs were shaky.

“I’ll be right back,” she said.

Sean stood and pulled her against his chest. “Don’t be long.”

Adrianna walked on rubbery legs around the huge pool, ignoring those around her, still mentally with Sean. The way he had kissed her was amazing. It was filled with emotion, tender and loving. Nothing like she’d ever experienced. Kisses like that she could become addicted to.

The music volume inside was even louder than out, and the party had reached a new level. There was some shouting a couple of rooms over. Otherwise, it was a rumble of voices drowned out by the rock tune reverberating against the walls. Winding through people, Adrianna found the stairwell and, holding to the polished wood railing, made it to the top.

Just to the right was one of the guest bathrooms, and the door was open. She went inside and locked the door. Putting her hand against her cheek, Adrianna expelled a breath. “Whew.” Sean was hot.
Oh my God.

Lightheaded, Adrianna used the facilities and then looked in the mirror. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes glassy. She needed to get it together. Taking a couple of deep breaths, she turned toward the door. The bathroom was large and had its own lounge, complete with a padded reclining sofa in maroon fabric. The sink area was tiled but the anteroom was carpeted with a thick beige rug. It had never struck her before, but the design was decadent.

Reaching for the doorknob, she closed her eyes, summoning strength. There was no way to resist Sean. She didn’t want to anymore. But her lack of experience with such a passionate man made her anxious. The anxiety, together with the excitement she felt, made butterflies race in her stomach. Adrianna hesitated, but only for a moment, then excitement won out.