Persephone (18 page)

“How else would I see you?”

“Get away from me!” I pushed him away. When he didn’t budge I glared at him.

“Tell me you will never attempt to charm me again.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. Even I knew better than to throw around words like
never
. I could only speak the truth, and future intent got messy when you couldn’t lie.

He seemed to realize what he was asking, and shook his head. “Just…don’t. How would you feel if I could just look into your eyes and make you do something that you didn’t want to?”

He was right. I dropped my gaze to the floor. I’d tried to control him, to strip him of his will. “I’m sorry,” I whispered. “I won’t—”

“Stop,” he warned me. “You don’t know what the future holds.” He sighed. “Helping Orpheus was unusually stupid of you.”

“If I can help someone, I will. I’m done watching people suffer.”

“You can’t save everyone,” Hades said, his voice gentling. He drew a deep breath and took a small step away from me. “The sooner you realize that, the better it will be for you.”

“I’m not suggesting we return everyone to life, but it was possible in this situation.”

“So?”

“So! He literally went through Hell to save her! Her death was a pointless accident. It wasn’t fair!”

“Life isn’t fair! Why should death be any different?”

“Did you ever stop and wonder if maybe that attitude is why the gods are dead?” I asked. “People don’t believe in gods because they can’t wrap their minds around the idea of someone allowing all the terrible things in the world to happen.”

“Reality has teeth and claws. It’s rarely pretty and never fair. Haven’t you figured that out yet?”

I clenched my fists. “Why? I get that no one has the power to interfere now, but when the gods were in power, how could they let things get this bad? You’re here every day! You hear the stories of murder, thievery, and worse. You see the children who starved to death. This isn’t a recent development. Why didn’t you stop it?”

“We gave humans free will—”

“That’s bull!” I exploded. “If you have the power to stop someone from getting killed and don’t, you’re just as guilty as whoever pulled the trigger.”

“Where do you draw that line, Persephone? There are billions of humans, and a handful of us—”

“Who allowed humans to get to the billions? That was greed, plain and simple. More humans equaled more worship. And really, between the God of Mist, and the God of Doorways, and the god of every other useless thing, you couldn’t at least
try?
”

“You’re angry. I understand. You didn’t see this side of the world back in your flower shop. Your mother kept you sheltered. It’s a bit of a shock at first, but—”

“But what? Over time I’ll get used to it? Used to seeing children in the court of the dead? Used to watching husbands cry over lost wives? Why
should
I get used to it when I can do something
about
it?”

“You can’t save everyone. You just don’t have that power.”

“But you did! You each had the power to grant immortality!” I threw my hands in the air. “Why were only some people given the gift? My mother has the power to make things grow anywhere. How come people are still starving? Are you all so full of yourselves that you think you’re any more deserving of these gifts than any one of those humans?”

Hades took me by the shoulders. The cold marble pressed against my back. I ground my teeth, raising my chin to meet his eyes, trying to catch my breath. “Persephone—”

The door to the throne room slammed open and a dripping wet Charon stormed into the room. “What the hell, Moirae? You can’t just zap people out of my boat. It knocked the whole thing off balance—”

He froze when he saw me and Hades.

“Um…” He took a step backward. “I’m really…I’m going to go.”

“No,” I said coldly, pushing Hades away from me with all my strength. He rolled his eyes and stepped away. “I was just leaving.”

I stormed out of the castle. I’d made my big speech with my big promises, completely forgetting that my big power was making flowers bloom. Like that could help anyone!

Don’t forget your awesome charisma.
I snorted, walking along the River Styx. To think I’d considered… Hades sucked. I wanted a guy like Orpheus. Orpheus had gone through Tartarus to rescue his wife—
that
was love. Hades probably didn’t even know the meaning of the word love.

That was the problem with gods. They could never sacrifice for love like humans did. How could they possibly understand emotions as well as we—

I stopped walking.
I’m not human.

I’d accepted the fact I was a goddess, but it felt more like my title than my species. I hadn’t considered that I wasn’t human. Would I be as detached as Hades was in a few hundred years? Was that my future? Would I ever feel the kind of love that would drive me to walk through Hell for the other person if they needed it?

Not from Hades, that was for sure. “How else would I see you?” I mocked, throwing in a heavy sigh for good measure. I didn’t know why I cared. It wasn’t like I felt anything for him. He was annoying, proud, he sighed all the time, and he was inconsiderate. Well, that wasn’t always true. Sometimes he was good, kind, and comforting. Like after I had my nightmare, he’d held me and—

I swore, scowling at my reflection in the crystalline waters.

“Persephone!” Thanatos called. He walked quickly to catch up to me.

I walked faster. “Leave me alone.”

“What happened? What did he do?” Thanatos took a few steps at a run over the grass-covered hill until he reached my side.

“I don’t want to talk about it, and I don’t want company.” At his hurt look I softened my tone. “Sorry, I just… You said not to think of you as a guard, remember?”

He nodded. “Right. We’re friends.”

“Then be my friend. Give me some space right now, okay? I can’t think unless I’m alone, and I’m never alone here. There’s always someone—” I took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have to hide in my room if I want some space.”

Thanatos hesitated. “Okay,” he agreed. “I’m going to walk away, I’ll be at the bottom of the hill, out of sight, out of hearing range, out of mind, I hope. Take as much time as you need. Just promise to come get me when you’re done. And please, don’t wander off.”

I looked around, surprised to find I was next to the thin ribbon of fire that marked the boundary of Tartarus. I hadn’t been paying attention to where I was walking. I’d just walked away from Thanatos.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll stick around.”

He nodded, but his face was troubled, like he had misgivings about leaving me by myself. But true to his word he walked down the large green hill. He faded from sight and I sat down at the edge of the river of flames and watched them dance wickedly down their slope. It
was
a river, not a wall of fire as I’d assumed in Latin class. I could see clearly to the other side, but there was nothing there. The landscape continued into the distance unchanged. A trick of the eye, maybe? If
I
was sentenced to Hell, I’d stay by the river my whole afterlife in hopes I could somehow escape.

It wouldn’t make sense for the good to have to watch the bad suffer for all eternity, I mused, but the other way around would be torturous. What if, on the other side of the fire, I was being watched? There could be someone standing a mere foot from me and I wouldn’t be able to see them because of some magic trick.

The river was beautiful; it would be pretty cool to just touch it…

Entranced, I knelt by the water’s edge and held my hand over the flames. I could feel heat, but it wasn’t as blistering as I’d imagined it would be. I touched my fingertip to the flame, grinning when it didn’t burn.

“How cool.” I took a furtive glance around then stuck my hand into the river. It felt wet. Not like fire at all. I grinned, entertaining thoughts about swimming in the river of flames as I watched them curl over my hand. Something snaked through the river and wrapped around my wrist.

The shock barely registered before I felt a sudden yank. I screamed as I was pulled across the river.

Chapter XVI

I gasped as I was pulled through the river of fire and into Tartarus. I didn’t get burned, but I felt frozen inside. I stumbled, shocked, and landed on the icy red sand. It was so cold it burned. I was stunned at the sudden change from idyllic scenery to elemental horror. The sky was black, with neon green and bright blue flashes of lightning lancing through the sky, revealing frightening shapes and deformed creatures crawling over the sand.

Someone stood beside me, his hand still gripping my wrist. My mind screamed at me to stop looking at the scenery and face this new threat, but I couldn’t move. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the terrible sight. My chest heaved as I struggled to catch my breath. I couldn’t seem to breathe here. My skirt dripped tiny flames. The burning cold sapped away my strength. I tore my gaze from the landscape and struggled to turn my head to the side.

“Pirithous!” Adrenaline filled my veins, giving me the strength to scurry away from him with a half shriek that came out sounding more like a terrified squeak.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself like Charon taught me. My heart thundered in my chest and every instinct told me to get up and run. I struggled to my feet, eyes widening when I took in Pirithous’ changed appearance.

He stepped forward, face gaunt. He looked like a walking skeleton, with cracked and dried skin hanging off his bones. He didn’t have an ounce of fat or muscle left on his body. I recoiled when I saw that his eyes were yellow and his hair was falling out in patches.

“What happened?” The question was ridiculous. I shouldn’t care what happened to him; I should be running. But the change was so drastic, so far beyond my comprehension, that the question just slipped out. I took a small step backward toward the river, hoping Pirithous wouldn’t notice.

“I followed a tip on where to find you, and met a woman named Doso. Turns out she was your mother in disguise. She cursed me with eternal hunger.” He laughed bitterly. “I eat all day, and it doesn’t matter. I’m starving!”

I couldn’t reconcile the image of my loving mother causing a person—any person—enough suffering to look as bad as Pirithous did right now. “My mom made you starve to death?” I asked, taking another small step. My foot brushed against the water, the freezing heat searing my toes.

“Oh, she won’t let me die that easily. Luckily, someone else took an interest in me. He showed me this entrance to the Underworld. Didn’t know I’d be walking through Hell, but the people here didn’t bother me. I guess when you look like this—” Pirithous held up his arm, and I shuddered when I realized I could see the skin between his bones touching. Every vein strained against the gaunt flesh, a landscape of blue bumps. The bones protruded from his paper-thin skin. “—they figure you belong in Hell.”

“You came here for
me
?” I needed to keep him talking. If he got distracted enough I could make it across the river. I’d be free as soon as I got onto the shore. I just needed to find the strength to run.

“I couldn’t cross the river.” His bony fingers dug into my arm. “So I watched and waited. You came.” He grinned, the action stretching his skin even tighter across his face. “I knew you would.”

I yanked my arm free, rubbing it in disgust. “Haven’t you learned your lesson yet? My mother didn’t put this curse on you because you asked me out for coffee. This kidnapping thing is never going to end well for you.”

“Oh, I don’t want you anymore.”

Something was draining my energy, but it had to be affecting Pirithous too. I thought fast. I was weaker than usual but that didn’t mean I was at a disadvantage.

“Then what? Revenge? You can’t kill a goddess,” I said, with more bravado than I felt. Every word I spoke left my lips reluctantly. All I wanted to do was curl up in the sand and go to sleep. Only fear kept me on my feet.

“I found another god interested in your whereabouts. He approached me after your mother cursed me. Said if I could bring you back, he’d fix me.”