Persona (25 page)

He didn't dare think,
Me
. Everything about him was a spy. He wondered if Li Zhao had known it would be worse like this, always looking but afraid to ever find her.

But he wouldn't let it turn into a punishment. It stung, and it would always sting, but it was better than not knowing about her. Anything was better than not knowing.

The Central Committee filed in last. Most of them took the stairs to the side of the stage and found a place in the risers of upholstered chairs grouped stage left for them; just ostentatious enough to be seen, just far enough to seem out of the way.

Margot kept walking right to the center of the stage. She was wearing a pale-blue suit a shade lighter than her eyes, and her face was a mask of noble altruism.

She delivered her introduction smoothly, took her seat at the front of the Committee, without a care in the world.

Daniel never heard what she said. He was already leaning against the glass, looking for Suyana as she cleared the wings.

She wore a turquoise dress that made her look older and sharper than he'd ever seen her, and her long hair swung like a pendulum as she crossed the stage.

The look she gave Margot was that of two people at war, and Daniel had two thoughts at once—
Be careful
, and
What a story that will be
.

He tried not to feel guilty. There was no harm in it, now. That was just what he was.

The angry, ugly bullet wound on her arm was Suyana's only jewelry, and it burned purple and white against her skin under the lights all the way up to the podium.

She took her position, her hands curled around the sides as if she were bracing for impact. She cast an eye around the room—Daniel thought her eyes lingered as she looked across the Big Nine, but maybe that was just something the Big Nine required.

Then she scanned the gallery.

There was no way to prove she'd seen him. Her eyes flickered past the rows in turn, and then she was looking away, and even the camera couldn't say she had looked him in the eye. But she had. Just for an instant, she'd looked right at him. His hands were heavy; his lungs pulled tight.

(Once—it seemed very long ago—he'd looked at her and thought that following her was the luckiest thing he'd ever done.)

He held his breath for what felt like minutes, watching the lines of her face.

The camera took a thousand pictures as he watched her. It was a sound he was already used to; he hardly heard it anymore.

[
ID 35178, Frames 204–208: Suyana Sapaki facing the floor of the IA, beginning to speak.
]

SUYANA SAPAKI PERSONAL ITINERARY

[Classified] (For tomorrow —M)

Suyana gave herself a gift, and forgot some things.

It didn't matter what happened after Magnus appeared and asked the IA press for “please no more questions,” and pretended he'd never seen the corpse under her feet.

She could forget how it felt when Magnus took her shoulders harder than he had to, told the cameras she had no further comment at this time, kept her at an angle as they walked so he could look into her face.

(No knowing what he'd found. Better not to ask.)

She could forget the walk to the car—she'd had to step over the body's outstretched arm, which would have been terrible, if she remembered it—could forget how her body had turned to stone when she saw the ambulance and she'd insisted no hospitals; she forgot that Magnus took her in his car instead, cleaning the blood from her hands with some wipes he'd charmed off the medics, so that when she arrived at the hotel they would let her inside without making a scene.

She could forget the photographers outside the Pierrot, and however she must have looked to the cameras as she walked past them. She could forget the bouquet of flowers the concierge delivered, with compliments of Ethan, who wished to be informed of anything he could do.

There were problems she'd have to face in the morning, but she'd stood over a corpse and played the part that had to be played, and the rest would wait for her. She could forget some things.

She closed her eyes; she dreamed of the forest.

×  ×  ×  ×  ×  ×  ×

Her first visitor was Magnus, who came with the doctor just before dawn so she could be pronounced well enough not to faint on television.

“Thank you so much for your attentions,” Magnus said as he escorted the doctor to the door. “The Assembly makes excellent recommendations, we couldn't be happier with your work. Will there be serious scarring, do you think?”

“Yes,” the doctor said. “I don't know how badly, but there was a lack of sufficient treatment after the initial injury, and she's been hard on herself.”

“Of course,” Magnus said, which meant,
That's a shame
; then he thanked the doctor handsomely for his time, and closed the door.

When he came back into sight in the entry hall to her bedroom, he leaned against the door frame and came no farther. His hands were in his pockets, and his eyes fixed on the foot of the bed.

“You didn't say, last night, what happened.”

There was no blame in his voice for what she'd done. It was more generous of him than she'd expected, for him to trust her reasons.

She considered what she knew he could find out, balanced against secrets she might be able to keep. If he knew Margot was against her, he might help; there were alliances that could be made, and Magnus was a master of the game.

But if he knew, he could also turn her over to Margot, if things ever soured at home. Margot wanted a lot of people gone. Suyana couldn't risk that Magnus would ever be willing to hand her over for a chance at Margot's good graces. It was no good telling Magnus too much of the truth.

“He was going to kill me,” she said, settling on the cleanest lie. “He killed your man, I guess.”

Magnus started to look at her, stopped. “Yes.”

(Some things she hadn't forgotten. There were things she knew about the way a blade cut through the body that would never go.)

Then she said, “It was a good lesson. We've both learned something.”

He frowned. “Suyana—”

“I should shower and dress,” she said. “If you'll excuse me.”

And because he was a diplomat, and manners must trump pride, he closed the door behind him without another word.

×  ×  ×  ×  ×  ×  ×

Her second visitor was Grace, who arrived just as the suite phone started ringing.

Magnus let her in, looking a little surprised that they rated a visitor from the Big Nine, and then headed straight for the phone.

“Sorry,” said Grace. “It's probably our fault the press figures you're awake.”

“ ‘Our'?”

Grace rolled her eyes. “Colin insisted on coming. He's hovering in the hallway just in case one of the porters pulls a gun.”

Suyana smiled, and indicated the pair of chairs farthest from Magnus.

Magnus was already handling the call, his fingers flying over his tablet. “No interviews until after the press conference,” he was saying. “I'm sure you understand, but after that we can of course look at her schedule—”

“How did your evening go, with the excitement? Was Magnus your last dance?”

Grace's posture was the picture of ease; you'd never know she was asking if the man ten feet away had tried to kill her.

“No,” Suyana said. “My guest from Terrain helped me sort out my dance card.”

“I see. Do I want to know?”

“It's worth your life,” Suyana said.

After a moment, Grace shook her head.

“The United Kingdom wishes to extend its warmest sympathies,” she said instead, in her public voice. “It admires the UARC for its determination and its victory, and looks forward to working together on committee projects to which, I understand, you'll soon be invited.”

Grace's rueful smile started about halfway through her speech, and Suyana had to bite back a grin.

“The United Amazonian Rainforest Confederation thanks the United Kingdom for its kind words,” Suyana said, pulling a face Magnus couldn't see. “I look forward to further negotiations of our countries' best policies.”

Grace tilted her head to hide her smile from Magnus. “Very kind,” she said, as the bell rang, and Martine let herself in.

“Christ,” she said, “I got up in the dark to come down here before the photographers could roll out of their pens, and I still end up walking a gauntlet. What exactly do they think they're going to get a shot of, milling in front of the hotel, you murdering a waiter? Hello, Magnus. Grace.”

She sat without invitation on the third seat.

Magnus seemed too baffled by her presence to have taken offense, and before he could decide whether to mention it, the phone rang again, and he was off to the races.

Suyana took great offense to pretty much everything about Martine, but didn't think it was worth provoking someone who had kept quiet about the first secret she'd been handed.

“Martine,” she said. “The United Amazonian Rainforest Confederation welcomes you.”

“The Kingdom of Norway had better damn well be welcome at this hour,” Martine said. She slid a small pastry box across the coffee table between them. “The Honorable Ambassadorship of Too Shy to Show Her Face hopes you're recovering well from nearly being shot to death.”

“Martine, really.”

“Very well, thank you,” Suyana said. Then, feeling a little wicked, “It was a long way to come to deliver this, though. The George V has to be five, ten blocks from here.”

“I wanted to see how mean you looked before the stylists got you made up,” Martine said. “It's been worth the trip.”

“We'll leave you,” Grace said, standing and shooting Martine a look that left no room for negotiation. “We know you'll have a very busy day, and I'm sure you'll want to prepare for Ethan, when he arrives.”

“Ethan?” Suyana blinked.

Martine huffed a laugh. “You said something to the cameras about how much you'd missed him in captivity. Either you're really in love with the shallowest boy in the IA, or you're an artist.”

Suyana was grateful for the warning. Ethan would bring cameras with him. Magnus needed to call a stylist, now.

“Good luck today,” Grace said.

“Thank you,” said Suyana. She was already opening the little bakery box with two tiny cakes inside. They were frosted white; one was topped with a candied violet, one with a blue fondant bird.

Gooseflesh crawled up her arms.

(She would have a contact soon. The message was signed in violet and stamped with Kipa's Passerine; this message had come from their mutual friends. And she was telling Suyana, because Chordata had told her it would be all right. It felt like she could breathe, suddenly.)

“Don't eat those,” said Martine.

Grace was nearly at the door, waving her good-byes to Magnus, but Martine was still standing over her.

“Why not,” Suyana guessed, “they'll ruin my matronly figure?”