Pieces For You (28 page)

“We need to find Ev and Hunter and say goodbye, then you need to take me home…STAT.  You just made a whole lot of promises I expect you to deliver on.”

“I didn’t say a word,” he said, his voice coarse with desire.

“Your mouth may have been silent but your body was speaking loud and clear.  You find Huntleigh while I use the restroom.  I’ll meet you near the bar in three minutes and then we are out of here.”

He pulled me in for a quick kiss, whispering “bossy little thing” against my lips before releasing me with a nod.  I hurried to the bathroom, grateful to find it empty.  He had worked me into such a frenzy I could barely contain my impulse to jump on him and take what I hungered for with reckless abandon.  I finished my potty break in record time and headed for the bar. 

I was fifteen feet from my destination when someone grabbed my arm on a backswing.  With a quick jerk, they forced my body to turn, and before I could react or process what was happening, I was imprisoned in unfamiliar arms as a mouth took unwelcome possession of mine.  No wait, these weren’t unfamiliar…I knew the feel of this body, his taste.  My panic was skyrocketing, but I gathered enough of my wits to bite his lip.  When he pulled back I swung to hit him, but he caught my arm before I could make impact.  Standing before me, looking exactly as he did when I last saw him six months ago, was my ex-boyfriend, Robbie—the coward.  Apparently, he had no qualms about taking what he wanted from an unwilling woman—lie with pigs and you’ll smell like shit…the adage never made more sense to me.

“Let me go, asshole,” I said forcefully.

“Sam, we need to talk.  I made a huge mistake.”

“What you did was more than a huge mistake.  Now let me go.”

“Baby, let me explain—”

“Don’t you dare fucking call me that!  You are a sniveling, weak, sorry excuse for a man who sat quietly by while girls were beaten, raped, and murdered.  You knew what
he
was doing and never spoke up.  I can smell your guilt and see the blood on your hands and I want nothing to do with you.  ”

He continued to keep my body locked against his, so tightly I couldn’t escape.  My attempts to wiggle free proved futile.

“I understand why you are so mad.  You have every right to be, but I promise I’ve changed.  We can be together again.  We can move past everything that happened and rebuild our lives.  We need each other…we won’t ever be able to survive this alone; too many people in our circle know what happened.  No woman will want to be with a man branded a coward, especially if my father pulls his financial backing, and no man is going to want a used woman.”

I gasped at his cruel comment but he continued, completely unaware, “But I still want you.  I don’t care what Heath did to you, I still see how beautiful and special you are.  Can’t you feel how much I want you?”  He ground an unimpressive erection against my stomach to emphasize his point.

Oh god, I was going to be sick.  My head was spinning—the past and the present converging—stealing all rational thought.

“Let me go, let me go, let me go…” I screeched, “please, no…please—” I finished with an anguished whimper.

His body disappeared so abruptly I would have face-planted if another set of arms had not grabbed me from behind.  I struggled initially before I heard the voice in my ear.

“Sam, it’s me.  I’ve got you, you’re okay.  Just breathe,” Ev said, the words flowing from her in one breath, spoken with conviction.

I relaxed into her support and fought to separate from the besieging memories.  As my grasp on reality returned, I became aware of angry shouting and grunts.  I turned my head, unprepared for the violence that greeted me.

“No,” I whispered, praying my eyes deceived me.

Griffin was perched on top of Robbie, his fists landing punch after punch on a defenseless Robbie’s body and face.

“You do not fucking touch her.  You. Never. Fucking. Touch. Her,” he punctuated each word with a blow that would incapacitate a man far larger than Robbie.  “You sick fucking fuck—you did this to her…your fucking fault.”  He continued to shout as he landed blow after blow.

The Griffin I knew was gone, replaced by a brutal man I didn’t recognize—a man who terrified me.  Blood splattered the floor, the sprays marring both of their shirts.  Robbie’s face was unrecognizable and he was no longer conscious, but the punches continued, accompanied by a sickening wet thud followed immediately by a harsh, cracking sound.  I knew that sound…I had heard it before, only the last time I was the one laying in Robbie’s place and the psychopath, Heath, was delivering the face-shattering blows.  I watched mindlessly as Hunter and a bouncer tried to intervene, but even their combined strength was not enough to deter Griffin.

A piercing sound rang in my ears and all I could think was that they needed to shut off the damn fire alarm before my brain exploded.  The deafening racket finally penetrated Griffin’s homicidal rage and he turned toward me, looking dazed.  When he gestured to me as if intending to rise, I hurled my body away from him, taking Ev with me.  I was crab-walking backward as soon as I hit the ground, desperate to put distance between myself and the blood-soaked monster.  The last thing I saw before Ev clutched me to her chest was Griffin surveying the carnage, a look of abject horror on his face before he returned his eyes to me.

With my face buried in Ev’s ample chest, I realized that the earsplitting sound was muffled.  Fuck!  I was making that ghastly noise.  I shut my mouth abruptly and dragged a shuddering breath past my burning throat.

I distantly heard Hunter ordering someone to call an ambulance, then instructing the bouncers to take Griffin to the office to clean him up.  I never lifted my head from Ev’s chest.  I heard grunts and shuffling, but fortunately no sounds of him putting up a fight.  The movement stopped and I heard his voice softly calling to me from a distance.

“Lo…baby,” he said, his voice oozing despair.

I shook my head, never looking up.

“I’m sorry.  I never…I wouldn’t—I’m so damn sorry,” he whispered, barely audible.  The shuffling resumed and I knew he was gone.

“Go get the car,” Ev said to Hunter quietly and without room for question. 

We sat mutely while we waited; Ev stroked my hair and soothed me once again, like a mother would do for her damaged child.  How fitting, because that is exactly how I felt:  damaged and brokenhearted.  I may never have spoken the words, but I had fallen in love with Griffin.  And now it turned out he wasn’t who I thought he was…he had hidden a monster inside of him and betrayed me with his omission.

“Can I touch you, Sam?” Hunter was already back. 

I nodded, too drained to do much else.

Hunter lifted me, carried me outside, and positioned me in the back of his Yukon.  Before I even processed my relocation, Ev sat next to me and wrapped her arm around my shoulders.  In another flash, I was in Hunter’s arms again, entering his apartment. 

He set me gently on the couch, which Ev had unfolded into a bed the minute we arrived.

“I’m going to check on him.  You got her?” Hunter asked quietly.

“Of course, take your time.  Make sure he gets home safely…I can’t imagine what he must be feeling…don’t let him do anything stupid.”

Hunter nodded and was gone after a quick kiss.  I slumped back and rested my head against Ev’s shoulder; I needed the human contact to remind me I wasn’t completely alone in the world.  Tears flooded my eyes and the weight of losing Griffin, or at least the man I thought he was, settled heavily on my chest. 

I wasn’t upset he had hit Robbie; the asshole deserved it for what he had done both tonight and in the past.  He was partially responsible for the deaths of three girls and the heinous rapes of more than 25 others—a thorough beat-down was exactly what he deserved. 

No, it wasn’t the punches that terrified me; it was Griffin’s absolute and unmitigated loss of control.  His fury consumed him and he lost all restraint, pounding Robbie as if possessed.  I had no doubt he would have killed him had Hunter not intervened.  I trusted Griffin, but I also knew he could snap me like a twig beneath the sole of his size fifteen boots.  So what would have happened if I ever pushed him too far?  How could I protect myself if I didn’t know where
his
landmines were buried?

“Ready to talk about it?” Ev asked.

I shook my head in reply.

“Sam, I need words, just a few so I know you aren’t going nonverbal on me.”

“Not tonight, Ev.”  It was all I could muster to pacify her, but it was enough.

I lay perfectly still for several minutes, focusing on my breathing, desperate to stave off the avalanche careening toward me, but it was no use.  I couldn’t outrun it and I couldn’t stop the inevitable, so I succumbed.  Giant sobs wracked my body, grief pouring from me in unintelligible wails.  I grieved for the Griffin I thought I knew; the stable man I had fallen in love with had proved to be no more than an illusion.  I mourned the death of the fantasy I had unwittingly constructed in my mind…the one where we lived happily ever after.  I also suffered the loss of the Sam I was with Griffin, the girl he encouraged and inspired me to be.

“It h-hurts…s-soo…bb-baad,” I forced through my gasping cries.  “Lll …llooved—”

“Shh, breathe Sam.  Shh, just breathe,” she repeated the mantra over and over as she hugged me.

Eventually I cried myself to sleep, but I couldn’t escape my pain, even in rest.  My unconscious mind taunted me with Griffin’s horror-stricken expression when my screeching registered.  I relived the look of self-disgust etched across his face when I crawled away from him in terror.  Griffin haunted me all night, his pain amplifying my own.

"We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone.  Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone."  -Orson Welles

I awoke the following morning with an emotional hangover and the absolute worst stiff neck ever, courtesy of Hunter’s pull-out couch—ugh, all the traditional symptoms of overindulging without any of the fun.  My body hated me and was sending its message loud and clear.  I lay unmoving, unable to ignore Ev and Hunter’s hushed conversation filtering in from the nearby kitchen.

“How is she?” Hunter asked, concern evident in his voice.

“She’s a disaster.  Babe, if you could’ve heard her last night…god, she was in agony.  She was sobbing so hard I thought she was going to be sick.  It was heart-wrenching.  How’s Griff?”

Hunter’s groan was a mix of frustration and pain.

“That good, huh?” Ev asked sympathetically.

“He’s devastated, destroyed.  He thinks any hope he had for a future with Sam was obliterated last night and he’s not coping well.  He drank himself into oblivion, but not before listing every stupid choice he’s ever made to prove that nothing compared to losing it on Robbie.  All he can see without Sam in his future is desolation—he always believed they would end up together for the long haul.  I don’t think he’s able to picture a future without her…he may never be.”

“Fucking Robbie!  He’s a tornado, destroying everything he comes near, leaving tragedy in his wake.  How many more lives will he passively ravage?” Ev fumed.

“I know, angel, I know.”

It seemed like the right time to announce I was wake so I made a production out of stirring, ensuring my movements were heard.  I headed toward the kitchen as Ev and Hunter exited.

“Sit,” Hunter ordered, “omelets will be ready in ten minutes.”  He ruffled my hair and squeezed my shoulder as he passed me. 

I sat at the dining table as commanded, grateful not to have to decide what to do with myself.  Ev placed a mug of coffee and two Advil in front of me before taking a seat.  The silence wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t comfortable either.  I traced the grain of the natural oak tabletop with my finger, searching the wood fibers for answers I hadn’t found elsewhere. 

I didn’t know what to say.  I wanted to reassure them I would be okay, but it would be a lie.  I would survive—I had learned the hard way I could survive anything—but that was the most I could promise with confidence.  How could I have been so wrong, so utterly and completely blind to the darkness lurking in Griffin?  I no longer trusted my own judgment; my instincts—my gut—had failed me. 

I was never one to hide from harsh realities, to turn a blind eye or lie to myself.  I knew
he
…Heath (there, I said it, at least in my mind)…was depraved from the first time I met him.  Not the extent of his psychopathy maybe, but his pathological narcissism.  And I may not have grasped the depth of Robbie’s cowardice while we were together, but I did see the flaw.  I just never imagined the ramifications of Robbie’s weakness.  Fear shaped his character, resulting in a lack of integrity and personal accountability, which would have led most others to step forward and prevent tragedy.  I pegged Hunter as a man of honor and morality even during his mysterious, secret-keeping period, which Ev had since dubbed his ‘Shady Phase.’  Hell, I even pegged my first serious boyfriend as a cheater long before receiving hard evidence.  My intuition had never failed me and to do so now was inexcusable.