Plain Jayne (33 page)

Ignoring the stack of mail waiting for her, she stood at the front of the store looking at all
the boxes and piles she’d collected, knowing full well she wasn’t going to get anywhere with them tonight. She needed to talk to Nick, just to let him know about Brett. It wasn’t that she owed him an explanation, but for some reason she thought she should be the one to give him the heads-up on it. Maybe she was making too much of everything. Why would he even care? After all, Ellie was right; Nick was the one who was so keen to set her up in the first place.

She grabbed her phone and fired off a quick text.

Okay if I come over? Need to talk
.

A few seconds later, his reply buzzed.
Good. Ya. Meet me @ home in 5
.

After a quick change of clothes, she gathered her keys and a little courage, and pulled open the back door.

“Maya!” The poor girl looked like hell. Her eyes, usually such a soft blue, were red-rimmed and swollen, splotchy patches covered both cheeks, and she was shaking from head to toe. “What’s wrong? Come in, come in.”

Jayne ushered her upstairs and sat her on the sofa.

“I’m sorry,” Maya sniffled. “But I saw your car, and I-I can’t go home.”

“Hold on.” Jayne ran to the bathroom, grabbed the box of tissues, and ran back.

“Thanks.” She pulled two or three out of the box and blew her nose long and hard. “I-I left him. I j-just couldn’t …”

“Oh, Maya.” Jayne pulled her into a hug and let her sob. “I’m so sorry.”

They stayed like that for a long time because Maya didn’t move and Jayne didn’t know what else to do. She’d never had friends like these ladies before and she’d certainly never been the one anyone came to for comfort. She rubbed Maya’s back and just let her cry, handing her clean tissues whenever one was needed.

“I tried, Jayne,” Maya choked. “I really did.”

“I know, sweetie.” Her phone buzzed in a text, no doubt from Nick, but she couldn’t very well answer it. “This isn’t your fault.”

“Yes it is! Why else would my own husband do this to me?”

“I don’t know.”

“It was our anniversary on Sunday and he … he was … and her … God, it’s so humiliating!”

“If anyone’s humiliated it should be the two of them! You did nothing wrong, Maya.”

But Maya didn’t seem to be listening. She just buried her face in her hands and rocked back and forth for a long time.

Nick’s ringtone blasted from Jayne’s phone, making her jump, but Maya kept on rocking, all the while moaning low in her throat. Jayne grabbed her phone, hit ignore, and went to the kitchen to make tea, cursing herself sideways for not stocking up on double-chocolate anything or Lay’s chips.

She’d barely filled the kettle when her phone blasted again. Quick as lightening, she hit mute.
Jeez, Nick, chill out
. She flipped to the text screen and fired off the fastest message she could.

Busy now. Talk later
.

When the tea was ready, she left her phone on the counter, poured Maya a big steaming mug with a little honey, and took it to the living room. At long last, Maya stopped rocking and let her head fall back on the sofa.

“What am I going to do, Jayne? How am I going to live?
Where
am I going to live?”

“Well, I’m sure—”

The downstairs door burst open, making Jayne jump. Tea sloshed out of her cup, burning her wrist and dripping all over the couch cushion.

“Jayne!”

Good grief. Before she could set the cup down on the table, he was at the top of the stairs.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” She hurried to the door to try and cut him off, but he was too fast.

“Then why didn’t you answer your phone?” He clomped into the apartment, looking around wildly until he caught sight of the top of Maya’s head. “Oh, hey, Maya.”

Jayne flattened her hands against his chest and shoved him back toward the door.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I can’t do this right now. I need to stay with Maya, so we’ll have to talk later.”

“But—”

She grabbed his sleeve and dragged him down the stairs. “She needs me, Nick. She left Will.”

“ ’Bout time.” His phone started ringing as he hit the bottom step. Before answering, he raised his brow at Jayne. “But we really need to talk, and I—”

“I know. Later.”

“So long as it’s tonight. I … hang on.” He shot her a wink as he pressed the phone to his ear. “Nick Scott. Hey Brett, what’s up?”

Jayne’s stomach clenched, then plummeted, landing somewhere near her toes. Maybe this had nothing to do with her, maybe it was about something else.

Right. And maybe Maya’s stupid-ass husband wasn’t a cheating pig.

“Yeah,” Nick muttered, his eyes darkening as he stared back at her, not blinking. “Is that right? Huh. No, she didn’t mention it. No, that’s, uh, that’s good. Good for you.”

“Nick.” Why was he looking at her like that?

“Nope.” His knuckles whitened around his phone. “Hey man, it’s got nothin’ to do with me. Yeah. Okay. Later.”

He ended the call but didn’t move, just stood staring down at his phone.

“That’s what I was going to tell you,” she said, forcing a smile. “I’m meeting him for a drink tomorrow, and then, I don’t know, I guess we’ll see. He seems like a nice guy.”

Nick’s whole body stayed ramrod straight except for his hand, which kept curling and uncurling around his phone. When he finally looked up, his icy glare pierced straight through her. His jaw twitched, then ground together so tight, Jayne feared it might shatter. Without a word, he jerked the door open and stormed outside.

“Nick, wait! What’s—”

He didn’t even slow down, just climbed into his truck and sped off into the dusk, leaving Jayne gaping after him. She expected it to be weird, she expected it to be uncomfortable.

She did
not
expect him to be furious.

*  *  *

“I’m sorry, Jayne. I didn’t mean to cause trouble here.” Maya paced near the door, her face still swollen, her arms still trembling.

“You’re not,” Jayne said. “It’s fine.”

“Maybe I should go.” She started for the stairs, but Jayne grabbed her by the sleeve and tugged her back.

“You’re not going anywhere. You’ll stay here tonight and we’ll figure out what to do in
the morning.”

“But what about Nick?” she sniffed.

That was a good question, but Jayne waved away Maya’s concern. “I’ll deal with that later. Right now, you need some rest.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, of course.” Jayne bobbed her head toward her bedroom. “Take my room. I’ve got lots of work to do downstairs.”

Maya’s expression went from sad and distraught to apologetic. “I’m so sorry.”

“Shush, it’s not your fault.” She tried to smile but it was far too much effort. “Do you want something to eat? I could make you a sandwich.”

“No thanks. I think I’ll just go lie down.”

“Sure. If you want something later, just let me know. Or help yourself.” She gave Maya another hug. “There’s a clean nightgown in the bottom drawer if you want.”

Maya’s blond curls bobbed in response, then she disappeared into the bedroom and closed the door.

Of all the times to be out of Ben & Jerry’s.

Jayne made another cup of tea and took it downstairs. Lights on, music down low so she wouldn’t disturb Maya, she began pulling books out of the first box and stacking them, spine out, on the shelf nearest the counter.

She sorted and dusted piles of mysteries, fantasy, romance, and westerns, then alphabetized them all among the books already set out.

Why the hell did everything have to be so damned confusing? Knowing Nick was mad at her about this left Jayne feeling shaky inside, overwhelmed, almost desperate, but the more books she sorted, the more that anxiety turned to something else, something she hadn’t often let herself feel in the past.

Anger.

Who the hell did he think he was? He had a girlfriend! All Jayne had done was agree to go for a drink with someone. A
nice
someone; someone he even liked, so what the hell was his problem?

He was the one who kept telling her how she deserved someone better than Barry, and besides, what the hell business of his was it who she went out with? She didn’t tell him who he
should or shouldn’t date!

By the time Jayne thought to drink her tea, it was long since cold, and several hours had passed. Time sure flew when you were pissed off. It didn’t surprise her when a text from Nick suddenly buzzed her phone in the middle of the night; what did surprise her was that it flashed through her mind to ignore it.

Can I come in?

She stared at the message for a few seconds before heading to the back door. Before she was halfway through the store, her phone buzzed again.

Front door
.

Fighting back a growl, she banged her phone down on the counter, accidentally knocked her mug over, and sent cold tea all over the day’s mail.

Muttering a not-so-ladylike curse, she fumbled with the front door lock, and pulled it open to find Nick standing right in the frame, his hands braced against either side. He looked like crap, pathetic really, and for an instant she almost let herself walk straight into his arms. Instead, she straightened her spine—a new appendage she was still getting used to—and stared up at him with what she hoped was a look of angry expectation.

“What?” Jayne held the door with one hand and pressed the other against her stomach, willing it to stop cartwheeling.

He looked down, closed his eyes for a second, then seemed to drag his gaze back up to hers. Good. He felt bad. He should. “I’ve been sitting out here in my truck wishing I could come up with something that would explain why I was such a …”

“A what?” she asked when he didn’t finish. “A stupid shit?”

His mouth twisted a little as he sighed. “Yeah.”

“And what did you come up with?” She was shocked at the strength in her own voice. Apparently so was he.

“Nothing,” he finally said, his voice low. “Not a damned thing.”

“That’s what I thought.” She turned around, leaving the door to slide closed, but Nick pushed it open and followed her inside.

“Jayne, wait.”

Funny, that’s what she’d said to him a few hours ago, and he hadn’t even slowed down, but now she was supposed to do what he wanted? Oh, she didn’t think so.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was right behind her, so soft, so tempting.

“Whatever.” She grabbed a dust rag from behind the counter and started mopping up the tea mess until Nick reached out and tugged the cloth out of her hands.

“I mean it. I’m sorry.”

“I know.” Jayne didn’t look at him, but even so, she could feel the heat of his gaze, knew he probably wanted to just hug her in the hopes that would make everything better. And for twenty-five years, it always had, but now …

Now it would only make things worse.

She lifted the pile of mail, watched the tea drip from the envelopes for a few seconds, then threw the whole pile back on the counter. Heaving a heavy sigh, she slumped back against the counter until she was sitting on the floor, her face buried in her hands. A second later, he slid down next to her.

“I don’t know what that was before,” he muttered. “It just surprised me.”

“What?” she snorted. “The idea that someone who’s not a complete asshole actually showed interest in ol’ Plain Jayne?”

“Don’t—! No.” He sat with his knees bent, his hands clenched straight on top. “It caught me off guard is all, and I guess I’m … I’m not ready to share you with anyone else yet.”

“You’re not ready to
share me
?” Jayne sucked in a breath and let her head fall back against the counter. “I’m not a bucket of Legos that you get to divide up between your little buddies, Nick.”

“I know. I didn’t mean … damn it.” He twisted his body so he sat facing her now. “I don’t know what to do here, Jayne. Tell me how to fix this and I will.”

Nick—always the fixer. It drove him crazy if he couldn’t figure something out, and this … well, she couldn’t help him because she had no idea.

“I don’t know,” she finally admitted. “Maybe it can’t be fixed.”

If she wasn’t so exhausted, she might have laughed at the frown that took over his face then; as though his brain refused to comprehend what she’d just said.

“But you’re still mad.”

“I’m not mad,” she sighed. “I’m … confused.”

She sat up and took his hand in hers, offering a small smile. “Do you remember the day I arrived, we were in your truck, you were being your pushy obnoxious self, and what did I say?”

His frown eased a little, and his mouth twitched ever so slightly. “You said it was going to be weird.”

Jayne lifted her right hand in the air, palm out. “Called it. Everything’s happened so fast; between the store, your work, Katie having a baby, us living together … we haven’t had time to figure out what’s what.”

“What d’you mean?”

“Come on, Nick,” she sighed. “I move back here after being gone twelve years and we pick up as though nothing’s happened; like we’re fifteen again and you think you need to look after me.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“No, it’s not bad. It’s just … I don’t know.” She fell back against the counter again and rubbed her face with her hands. “Maybe if we hadn’t spent so much time apart the last twelve years, or so much time together the last six weeks, or if you didn’t treat me like … it’s just weird.”

“It’s not weird!” His voice strained, as though he was trying very hard not to yell. “This is how I’ve always treated you, so what’s different now? You’re my family, Jayne.”

If he’d slashed her open with a razor-sharp machete, it couldn’t have cut as deep or as fast. It sucked the breath from her lungs and left her unable to do anything but blink. Her whole life, Jayne had wanted a family. No, she’d wanted Nick’s family, and here he was, giving her exactly what she’d wanted.

Shit
.

Lisa was right. Jayne was like a sister to him. Don’t cry. For God’s sake, do
not
cry.

She knew this was how he felt, she’d always known, so why was it unimaginably worse to hear him say it, to hear the very words slip from his tongue with such ease?