Play Safe (Make the Play #1) (13 page)

“Oh, I think she already does. And I think she likes what she sees.” He winks before strutting away from me.

Blowing out a breath, I slam my hand into a nearby locker. Pain shoots through my fingers, but I welcome it. The thought of that guy touching and kissing Emmy is too much to take. And no amount of punching lockers is going to make me feel better. I’m not sure anything will work right now. Well, anything other than Emmy in my arms. Emmy’s mouth on mine. Emmy’s hands on my body. Emmy curled against me, skin on skin. Groaning, I bang my head repeatedly against the locker.
Stop it, Chris. Stop it. Stop it.

“Christian?”

I jump at the sound of Emmy’s voice.

“Hey.” My gaze flickers to the other students passing by throwing me curious glances. Then it shoots to the ground, the lockers, the wall, the floor. Anywhere but her face. I’m afraid she’ll see the desire in my eyes, read the thoughts in my mind. Sweat forms on my brow, my face heating up.

“You okay?”

“Uh…yeah.” Glancing up, our eyes collide, and my heart stutters in my chest.

She moves closer to me, resting her shoulder against the locker. “You sure?”

I open my mouth to answer when the bell rings out. A kid races down the hallway slamming into Emmy, and she jostles forward. Throwing out my arms I catch her before she topples over. My hands lock around her waist as her body slides against mine. I swallow thickly, my mouth dry, as I lower my gaze to hers. Our faces are so close if I bend forward our lips will touch. And it takes every ounce of willpower I have not to do that. Gripping tighter to her waist, I stare deeply into her eyes as if begging her to give me permission to keep holding her, to touch her, to kiss her. Hell, I wish I didn’t need permission. I wish she was mine. I wish I had the right to touch her like this.

But I don’t.

She’s not mine.

She’s his.

Shuddering, I step back and release her.

“Um…thanks.” She lowers her gaze to the floor. “I better get to class.”

“Yeah, me too.” As I watch her walk away, I breathe deeply to slow down the racing of my heart.

Something’s not right.

Josh has been acting off all day. Actually, he’s acting a lot like he used to. Like the Josh before the bonfire party. He’s distant, and a little on edge. I keep asking if he’s angry with me, but he assures me he isn’t. Regardless, he’s no fun to be around. This morning he asked if I wanted to hang out this afternoon, catch a movie or something. Since the storm is still raging, baseball practice has been cancelled. And it did sound kind of fun earlier. Normally in the afternoons I just hang in my room doing homework and stuff. However, now that we’re at his house, all I want to do is take off.

We’re sitting on the couch and Josh is scrolling the movie times on his phone. “There’s nothin’ good showing.”

“That’s okay. We don’t have to see a movie.”

“Really?” He turns to me.

“Yeah.” The way his gaze roams my body, I can tell he thinks I’m giving him an invitation to do something else, and that makes my skin crawl. There’s no way I can make out with Josh this afternoon. It wouldn’t be right. Not when I’ve spent all day fantasizing about someone else. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about the way Christian held me in the school hallway earlier, about how good it felt when his hand slid against my waist. About how much I wished he would kiss me. When Josh’s face nears mine, I scramble off the couch. “Um…I really should get going anyway. I have a ton of homework.”

Ashley texted me earlier to see if I wanted to hang out this afternoon. I contemplate heading over to her house after this, but I don’t know if I’m up for Ashley either. I think I want to go home.

Josh grunts, shaking his head. “Whatever.”

Irritation blossoms inside of me. I’m tired of Josh and his attitude. Truth is, I’m tired of the whole relationship. If we can even call it a relationship. At this point I’m only using him as a way to get over Christian, and it’s not even accomplishing its goal. I need to call the whole thing off. The sad thing is that when I do, I doubt Josh will even care. Half the time I’m not sure he likes me.

“Josh,” I start, but he waves away my words.

That’s when I notice his phone buzzing. He brings it up to his ear. “Hey, man. What’s up?” He pauses. “No way.” Another pause. “That’s dope.”

I roll my eyes. It’s the most enthusiasm I’ve seen from him all day. With my hand on my hip, I wait while he talks to who I’m assuming is either Chase or Nolan. They’re the only people who elicit this much excitement from him. But as the conversation drones on, I get bored. He doesn’t even seem to notice I’m still here.

Oh well.
Shaking my head, I pick up my purse and stalk to the front door. Once outside, I hurry toward my car, jump inside and head home. As I drive, I decide that the next time I talk to Josh I’m breaking things off. This entire thing has gone on long enough. Even if I can’t have Christian, I don’t want to be with Josh. Being alone might scare me, but it can’t be worse than being in this kind of relationship.

When I turn onto my street, I spot Ashley’s car parked in my driveway.
That’s weird
. I know I told her I was hanging out with Josh. I wonder if maybe she forgot. Or maybe she talked to him and he told her I left. I park along the curb and cut the engine. I’m not really in the mood for Ashley, but I guess I have to be now. And that’s kind of how it goes when you’re her friend. She likes to show up unannounced. It’s sort of her thing. Cal says it’s because she has no idea how annoying she is, but he doesn’t know her like I do. Her home life is pretty sad. I think a lot of her behavior is to mask how lonely and unhappy she is.

With that in mind, I trek up the driveway and unlock the front door. When I step inside, I expect to see Ashley pop out, squeal, and wrap me in one of her perfumed hugs. But instead silence greets me. I do detect the faint smell of her perfume, though, and I follow its trail. As I near my room, I assume she’s waiting for me inside. Probably perusing my closet or going through my CD’s. My door is closed, so I pop it open. It’s empty.

Perplexed, I drop my backpack on the floor.

That’s when I hear Ashley giggling, and it’s coming from Cal’s room.
Great. If she’s bothering him I’m never going to hear the end of this. 
Groaning, I race toward the sound. When I reach his room, the door is ajar and I press my palm to it, opening it the rest of the way.

Then I inhale sharply, my eyes widening. What the ---

I don’t know where to look.

Everywhere my eyes land seems wrong.

Cal’s lips…on Ashley’s lips.

Ashley’s hands….under Cal’s shirt.

Cal’s fingers…tangled in Ashley’s hair.

Their legs…woven together so tightly it takes me a minute to decipher which ones are which.

Gasping, I take several steps backwards until my tailbone hits the opposite wall. Cal’s head swivels in my direction. His face pales, his mouth dropping open. “Emmy!”

I shake my head.
No way. This can’t be happening
. He doesn’t even like her. He tells me all the time. Unless he only said that to keep me from finding out. How long has this been going on? Heart hammering in my chest, I flee down the hallway and run to my bedroom. Then I slam my door closed with such force that one of the pictures on the wall falls to the ground. It’s of Ashley and me, so it seems fitting. I almost fling it across the room. But I don’t want to risk cutting my skin on glass.

“Emmy.”

I flinch when Cal pounds on my door.

“C’mon. Open up.”

I think about how I felt so guilty when I kissed Christian. It’s funny how I was worried about Cal’s feelings when clearly he’s not worried about mine. Then I realize I’m being unfair. I kissed Cal’s best friend. He kissed mine. How is that different? Maybe they really like each other. Perhaps they’ve been fighting their feelings for my sake. Maybe that’s the real reason Cal always says he hates her.

One. Two. Three breaths. I open the door.

“Hey.” Cal steps inside. “I’m so sorry.”

“How long has this been going on?” I ask.

Ashley appears behind him. I expect her to appear ashamed, but instead she looks smug.

“Not very long,” Cal says.

“Oh, c’mon, Cal.” Ashley runs her fingernails up Cal’s arm. “Don’t lie to her. We’ve been messing around off and on ever since you and I started hanging out.”

My jaw drops. And neither of them ever told me?

“Grow up, Em,” Ashley says in that condescending tone of hers. “You didn’t think I hung out here all the time just for you, did you?”

Her words are like a sucker punch to my gut. I feel so betrayed. By my so called best friend and my brother.

“Just go!” I say to both of them. I can’t stand to look at either of them. I need space. I need time to process this.

However, only Ashley listens. She spins around and sashays down the hallway. But not before mouthing, “Call me” to my brother.
Is she for real?

“Em, what can I say? I’m a guy,” Cal says after Ashley leaves. “Ash may be annoying, but she’s hot. And she was always throwing herself at me.”

“So you don’t even like her?” This is nothing like what happened between Christian and me. At least not on my end. I feel sick wondering if this was how Christian saw me though. Did he only kiss me because he thought I was throwing myself at him?

“We were just having fun.”

It’s the last straw. I glare at him. “Go to hell, Cal.” I’ve never spoken to my brother like that, but I’ve never been this angry before. I feel so betrayed. I feel so angry.

I feel so alone.

Finally there is a break in the rain, so I head to Cal’s. I texted him earlier, but he didn’t answer. However, he told me he was hanging out at home this afternoon, so I’ll catch him there. See if he wants to throw around the ball. I’m sure he’s missing it as much as I am. It’s muddy outside, but that’s not going to stop us. We can take a little dirt.

I don’t see Cal’s car outside, but I know that he sometimes parks in the garage. Besides, Emmy’s car is here, so I figure if he’s not home I’ll hang with her for a little while. I tell myself it’s purely innocent, but my palms moisten at the thought of being alone with her.

Mustering up all my self-control, I head to the front door. I knock several times before Emmy opens it. Tears streak her face, pain ravaging her features. All the air leaves me like a deflated balloon. Seeing her like this breaks me open, tugs at my heart. I’ve been trying to keep my distance, but all bets are off now. I tug her into my chest, my hands sweeping up her back. “What happened?”

She doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, she peers up at me and sniffles.

“Did Josh hurt you?” Anger surges through me. I’ve imagined pounding Josh’s face in for months. Now it seems like I’ll get my chance. I pull back, holding her by the shoulders. “I swear if he did --”

“No.” The word slices through mine. Pushing away from me, she wipes the tears from her face. I long to be the one to do that for her. What I wouldn’t give to touch her skin, to run my fingertips over her flesh, to comfort her. “Not him.” She walks away from the door, shivering. “Come inside. It’s cold out there.”

After firmly closing the front door, I follow her into the family room where she sinks down onto the couch.

“Then what’s going on?” I sit next to her.

“Did you know about Ashley and Cal?” She shakes her head. “Who am I kidding? Of course you did. He tells you everything.”

Not this.
“Are you saying what I think you are?”

She snorts. “My brother is fooling around with my best friend and you’re seriously gonna play dumb?” Throwing up her arms, she turns away from me. “Just go. I can’t take anymore lies today.”

No way am I leaving her like this. It kills me to see her in pain. Reaching out, I circle my hand around her wrist. Gently I pull her toward me. When she gets close enough, I tuck my finger under her chin and turn her head. “I promise you I’m not lying. I knew nothing about this. If I had I would’ve had a few choice words for Cal.”

Her eyes search mine. “Really?”

“Yes. Really.” Our gazes connect. “You trust me, right?”

She nods. “Right now, you’re about the only person I trust.”

“Even more than Josh?” I raise an eyebrow. It’s poor timing, but I have to know.

“Oh, yeah. Definitely more than him.”

My stomach tightens. “Do I need to kick some ass?”

She smiles, causing my heart to stutter in my chest. I love that I make her smile even after all she’s been through. “How about we take on one person at a time?” Sadness flickers in her eyes.

“Why do you stay with him?”

She yanks her arm from my grasp. “Why do you even care?”

Her words stun me. “You know I care about you.”

“Yeah, like a little sister.” She waves away my words flippantly. “I’ve heard it before.”

“It’s not like that,” I blurt out.

“Then what is it like?” There’s a flicker in her eyes that unnerves me.

I want to tell her how I feel, but I don’t know if I can. I’ve kept it inside so long I’m not sure how to say it. A minute passes in silence. The clock on the wall ticks.

Emmy’s gaze falls to her lap. “Forget it.” Sighing, she stands.  Lifting her hand she cradles her forehead. “I can’t talk about Josh with you right now.  I just lost my best friend and found out my brother betrayed me. I can’t handle anything else.” Her body shakes in frustration, and I feel like crap.

“I’m sorry,” I say gently.

She glances down at me with a look of surprise. Almost like she’d forgotten I was there for a minute. “The sad thing is that Cal doesn’t even like Ashley. He said he was just having fun.” A bitter laugh escapes through her perfect heart-shaped lips. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. This is what you guys do.”

My stomach churns. “What
we
do?” 

“Yeah.” She shrugs. “It’s like when you kissed me and it meant nothing to you.”

I leap up. “Is that what you think? That our kiss meant nothing to me?”

“Didn’t it?” She appears so vulnerable, I can’t stand it.

Needing to touch her, I reach out and swipe my fingertips over her cheek. This is the moment I need to turn around and walk away, but there’s no way in hell I’m doing that. Frankly, I’ve let this charade go on long enough. It’s time to lay it all on the line. I’m tired of keeping my feelings private. All it’s doing is killing me slowly. “Emmy, that kiss meant
everything
to me. I haven’t stopped thinking about it…or you…for one minute since that night.”

“But what about what you said afterward? I think your exact words were ‘this never happened’. Remember?”

“I never should have said that.” I graze my thumb over her smooth skin. “I was scared.”

“You? Scared?” She smiles. “I don’t believe it. Nothing scares you.”

“Nothing, except for you.”

“Why?”

“Because you make me feel things I’ve never felt before.” I step closer, my hand curving further around her face. “Because I care about you too much to lose you.”

“What makes you think you’ll lose me?”

“It’s what happens. Love doesn’t last forever.”

“Sometimes it does. Look at my parents.”

“True.” I nod.

“It’s not me you’re scared of losing, is it? You’re scared of losing Cal. You’re scared of losing this family.”

She knows me so well. “In the days after our kiss that’s all I could think about.”

“And now?”

“Now it’s killing me to stay away from you. Every time I see you I just want to…” I swallow hard.

“You want to what?”

“I want to do this.” Unable to contain myself any longer, I bring up my other arm to grip her waist. Then I draw her into my chest, angling my head downward. Lowering my face, our lips almost touch when there’s a knock at the door. “Damn it,” I growl. Emmy stiffens, holding her breath. There is fear in her eyes. My protective side rears its head. Holding out my arm, I stand. “Stay here. I’ll get it.”

“If it’s Ashley, I don’t want to see her.”

“I’ll get rid of whoever it is, okay?” I catch her eyes and she nods, trust evident. It makes my heart swell. Leaving Emmy in the family room, I take large strides to reach the front door. When I swing it open, my stomach drops. “What are you doing here?”

Josh’s eyebrows furrow in a quizzical look. “You the guard dog or what? I came to see my girlfriend.” With a look of disgust, he shoves past me.

It’s all I can do not grab him by the arm and restrain him. The only reason I hold back is because I’m not sure Emmy can handle it today, but I’m still not letting him anywhere near her. Stepping in front of him, I block his path.

“Emmy’s not up for visitors right now.”

“Visitors?” Josh cocks his head. “What is this? The damn hospital? I don’t know what game you’re playing, but you better step aside and let me see my girlfriend.”

“I’m not stepping aside,” I say firmly. “Not ever again.” Glaring at him, I hope he catches my double meaning.

“I know you’ve got a hard on for my girl, but she wants me. Not you. Got it.”

I wonder if he’d say that if he’d seen what was about to happen.

“Josh?” Emmy’s sweet, lyrical voice rings out.

He tosses me an I-told-you-so-look. The fight drains from within me. He may be an ass, but he’s right about one thing. She’s chosen him. Not me. Blowing out a breath, I step aside and allow him to pass me. But not before seeing the triumphant expression on his face.

“Hey, baby, what’s wrong?” He asks.

I can’t watch this shit.

“I’m gonna go,” I mumble, heading for the door.

“Christian, wait.” Emmy hurries after me.

When I reach the door, I swing around. The minute her light eyes meet mine, my heart softens.
Man, she owns me.

“Don’t leave mad.”

Her words are like a punch to the gut. I thought she was going to stop at the word “leave”. I thought she was asking me to stay. But no, she was asking me not to be mad.

Too. Flippin’. Late
. I was mad the minute she let that idiot into the house.

My gaze flickers over her shoulder to where Josh watches us with a wary expression. Leaning down, I whisper, “Ask him to go, and I won’t leave at all. And I sure as hell won’t be mad.”

Conflict rages like a storm in her eyes.

“You can’t have us both, Emmy. I’ve told you how I feel. If you don’t feel the same way, then fine. Own up to it. But if you do, you need to cut the extra baggage,” I speak softly, yet harshly. “I want you, but I won’t be strung along.” Stepping back, I say, “Ball’s in your court.” Spinning on my heels, I open the front door and step outside without bothering to look back. I don’t want to know her reaction. I won’t be able to stand it if I see that she isn’t watching me; if I see that she’s running back to him.

Without meaning to, I slam the door shut.

Hard. Too hard.

The windows shake with the force. Sometimes my emotions get the best of me, and I underestimate my own strength.

“Whoa. What did that door ever do to you?” Cal swaggers in my direction.

Cal and I have only been in a few fights over the years. Normally we see eye-to-eye. Cal’s a good guy. I trust him. And I certainly never thought I’d have to protect Emmy from him. But I guess there’s a first time for everything.

“Ashley? Really?” I cross my arms over my chest.

“She told ya, huh?” He looks toward the house.

I nod. My stomach knots when I think about Emmy inside with Josh. A part of me wants to know what they’re talking about, but the other part of me is sick just picturing it. “She’s pretty upset.”

“Yeah, she took it hard. I’m not sure why.”

I cock my head to the side in disbelief. “You may be a lot of things, man, but you’re not stupid.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyebrows knit together.

“C’mon, it’s her best friend. Of course she’d be upset.” The minute the words leave my mouth I feel like a hypocrite. I’m the last person who should be judging him for this. And really, I’m not. I don’t care if he wants to be with Ashley. Well, other than the fact that I can’t stand her, and I know he can do better. But my main concern right now is Emmy, and judging by how upset she is, I’m guessing there’s a lot more to this story.

He shrugs. “She’ll get over it.”

I’m surprised by how callous he’s being. For someone who has spent the past sixteen years defending his sister, his behavior is baffling. “It doesn’t bother you at all that you’ve hurt Emmy?”

“Dude, you know my sister. She’s overdramatic. By tomorrow she’ll move on to something else to cry over.” He grins. “Besides, it’s not like I did anything bad. So, I messed around with Ashley. Who hasn’t?”

He has a point. Ashley’s been around the block a few times. I can’t count how many times she’s come on to me. Fortunately, I never took the bait. Then again, desperation is not a turn on for me. I thought Cal felt the same way.

“But if you didn’t think it was wrong, why keep it a secret?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know. She’s the one who didn’t want Emmy to know, so I went along with it. And, honestly, it was kind of a turn on to keep it under wraps.”

I shake my head, still trying to process this. A montage of Ashley and Cal bickering floats through my mind. “I thought you hated Ashley.” That’s the part that bothers me. If he had a thing for Ashley I could understand that. Hell, I’ve been pining away for his sister behind his back. I get that you can’t always chose who you like.

“You know what they say, man. There’s a fine line between love and hate. Ash knew how to get me to cross it.”

I pause. “Do you actually like her?”

“Nah.” He shakes his head. “But she’s hot. And a hella good kisser.”

“Dude,” I start, but Cal cuts me off.

“Don’t worry. After my sister threw her royal hissy fit, I broke things off with Ashley. Nothing will happen between us again.” He looks at me pointedly. “So, we good?”

“I’m not the one you should be asking.” The minute I raise my thumb toward the house, the front door bursts open.

Josh stalks outside, a frown on his face. His expression stops me cold. Dude looks pissed. And his cheek is bright red.
What the hell?

“Congratulations. Looks like you got what you wanted,” Josh snaps at me before storming down the driveway and hopping in his car.

“What was that about?” Cal asks, a perplexed look on his face.

“No idea,” I lie. But deep down, my insides are having a freaking party. Did she really end things with him? And did she say it was for me? The longer Cal stares at me, the more I worry he’ll figure out what I’m thinking. If Emmy’s chosen me, I’ll have to tell Cal everything. But I’m not ready yet. Not until I know for sure. “Um…we should go see if she’s okay.”