Plum Girl (Romance) (27 page)

So she wasn't exactly a well-practiced diva in bed. She could improvise, couldn't she? In the deep recesses of her mind, she seemed to recall liking sex with Jake. A lot. She had a vague recollection of being pretty passionate and uninhibited, too. Although, four years may have warped the memory. Nevertheless, wasn't sex supposed to be one of those riding-a-bike things? Wasn't it all supposed to come back to her? Hmm... She had a feeling she'd find out soon enough.

* * *

Margot's face fell the minute she opened the front door. "Oh,
Lonnie, "
she whined disapprovingly, and scanned her daughter standing before her.

"What?" Lonnie asked, as she walked into the foyer, glancing down at herself and then back up. Margot grabbed her arm before she could move farther into the house.

"I asked you to look presentable!" Margot whispered angrily, shutting the door with her free hand.

"Is this what you call presentable? Sweatpants—or whatever those are—and with
holes
in your clothes!" She shook her head in disgust.

"This is what I was wearing today, jeez. What's the difference?"

Margot ignored the question, and maintained her huffiness as she hissed, "Did you do this just to spite me?"

"What are you talking about? What's the big deal about how I look?" Lonnie was getting fairly huffy herself by now.

"Because I
asked
you—" Margot stopped, looked over her shoulder, and whispered even lower, "Forget it. Just take off that big, boxy coat, for pete's sake!" Shaking her head again, she muttered, "I've never seen her wear that coat before in her life, but she wears it tonight." Lonnie's mouth dropped open—her mother was behaving like a loon.

"Do you need any help out there, Mrs. Kelley?" An unfamiliar male voice sounded from the living room.
Who was that?

"Uh... uh... N-no, I'm fine over here!" Margot called back, and wet her lips nervously. "Now, Lonnie—"

"Mom, what's going on?" Lonnie asked in a clipped, I'm-about-to-be-very-peeved-aren't-I tone of voice.

"Now, honey, just give this a chance—"

"Mom, what did you do?" Her voice rose, and she didn't care.

"Shh! Please, honey, you'll embarrass our guest," Margot urged.

"What
guest?"

"Shh!"

"Mom, answer me!"

"Hello there."

Lonnie whipped her head around to see Thomas Ellabee standing in the archway between the kitchen and the foyer.
Is it too late to be adopted?

"Oh, hi, Thomas," Lonnie managed pleasantly. "H-How are you? I mean, how have you been since the last time I saw you?"
Not the time I saw you at the mall and hid because I didn't want to talk to you—the
other
time.

"Fabulous," he beamed.

"Oh, well, that's nice to hear," she said politely.

"I'm doing absolutely fabulous," he repeated, with his default-contented smile in full effect. "And you?"

"Well...," she began, while Margot forcibly pulled the bulky parka off her, undoubtedly hoping whatever she had on underneath would be more attractive. For that moment, Lonnie was glad to be talking to Thomas, rather than catching her mother's face when she saw the pink-and-gray tie-dyed sweatshirt.

"I've been doing pretty well. Same old, same old—"

"Nonsense!" Margot yelped, too maniacally to be credible. "Lonnie, tell Thomas about all the exciting instructor positions you're applying for. But first, you two go into the dining room, and I'll put out dinner."

They moved into the dining room, per Margot's orders, and Lonnie tried her best to swallow her anger. For the moment. Her mother had gone too far this time. Ridiculously too far, but that was no reason to make Thomas feel unwelcome. He hadn't done anything wrong. It wasn't his fault that Lonnie didn't dig bouffants and already had someone in her life. A "boyfriend" in her life, to be exact.

Margot set down the salmon casserole giddily. It was the dish she was most proud of.... Too bad Lonnie hated salmon with a passion. Thomas certainly looked like he was enjoying it, though, which was obviously the goal of the entire meal. Lonnie's stomach growled as she picked at the crusty stuff on top and washed it down with some nice cold milk.

Thomas had requested it, spring-boarding a discussion with Margot about their shared "belief" in the importance of Vitamin D.

While Margot interviewed Thomas, Lonnie waited for the right moment to sneak into the kitchen and turn her glass of milk into a White Russian. She noticed her father's conspicuous absence at the table, and could only assume that he hadn't agreed with Margot's over-the-top meddling. Her mother had never done anything this extreme before—which told Lonnie that her mother was now panicking. It was as if she thought time was running out. It was as if she had no faith that Lonnie could attract a great guy on her own. It was damn insulting, is what it was!

"That's so interesting, Thomas! Lonnie, isn't that interesting?"

Considering that she'd been zoned out the whole time, it couldn't have been all that interesting, but Lonnie just nodded, smiling pleasantly. "Uh-huh."

"Lonnie, tell me about this instructor position," Thomas said conversationally, and pounded his third cup of milk.

"Oh. Well, so far it hasn't happened yet, but—"

"She's still making up her mind about exactly which college offers the most promise."

"Yeah, preferably one that acknowledges I sent a resume," Lonnie said, and Margot gritted her teeth.

"What subject would you teach?" Thomas asked, as he started on the second helping of salmon casserole that Margot had automatically heaped onto his plate.

"I don't know. I think I could teach a few different subjects, depending on what a particular school is looking for," Lonnie replied. She ate a morsel of casserole crumb topping, and tried to make it last. "But my strongest area would have to be feminist theory."

"Well, I don't know if I'd use the term 'feminist,' honey," Margot interrupted. "Thomas, she earned a master's degree in sociology. With honors."

"And then I earned a master's in feminist theory."

"With honors," Margot added desperately.

"In fact," Lonnie continued, just to annoy her mother, "I'd consider myself a hardcore feminist."

"Really?" Thomas raised a wary eyebrow.

"I have a lot of rage."

"Honey,"
Margot chided.

"Margot,"
Lonnie mimicked, and knew it was shamelessly immature. Oh well.

"Well, that sounds nice," Thomas said, obviously eager to bring the table talk back to mind-numbingly dull subjects like vitamin D. Meanwhile, Margot glared at Lonnie with the you're-gonna-get-it-later look that only a mother can perfect.

"So, Lonnie, I haven't seen you in church in quite a while," Thomas stated placidly.

"Oh... I know, but... see... well..." Lonnie stumbled feebly. He'd hit a nerve. The truth was, she
did
sometimes feel guilty about her lapses as a good Catholic girl.

"With all the work Lonnie does at the
law
firm," Margot interjected quickly, "it's hard for her to have a regularly scheduled mass time. Honey"—she looked at Lonnie enthusiastically—"tell Thomas about the time you were Mary in the Christmas play!"

"You mean when I was nine?"

"Her Sunday school teacher asked her specially if she'd play Mary," Margot explained, ignoring Lonnie's question.

"Really?" Thomas replied.

"It was because I had the longest hair in the class," Lonnie said honestly.

"It was not," Margot corrected, and turned her attention back to Thomas. "The teacher thought she was the most perfect one for the part. Because she was so expressive and articulate."

Margot went on. "She's always been like that. Just so expressive and creative and
bubbly."
Lonnie stared at her plate with a pained frown that could've come from sucking lemons.

"Like the time she dressed up as the Cookie Monster for her cousin's birthday party..."

Oh, no,
not
the Cookie Monster story! Lonnie had made the entire Kelley family take blood oaths that they'd never mention that again! She'd barely been thirteen; she'd been young and stupid. Aunt Christy told her the kids would get a kick out of it. How was Lonnie supposed to know years later she'd still be trying to live it down?

That was it. If Margot got out the snapshots of Lonnie in the big, hairy blue suit, with her permed mullet creeping out of the top, she was
out
of there!

"...well, the kids just loved it! And Lonnie went around passing out cookies and growling..."
Kill me. Kill me now.
What was next? The story of her first period? This was brutal.

"Mom, it's actually getting late. I've got to get going soon." Lonnie made sure to keep her tone polite and even, so her mother couldn't later claim she'd been rude. Or at least so her mother wouldn't have as much to act righteous about
when
she later claimed she'd been rude.

"Honey, wait, we haven't had dessert yet." The last time Margot encouraged Lonnie to have dessert was when she'd tried to convince her that canned pumpkin squash with a pinch of Sweet'N Low really wasn't all that different from pumpkin pie.

"I think I'll have to pass. I'm full." She pushed up from the table, cleared her place, and took her dishes into the kitchen. While she was dumping her uneaten casserole into the garbage disposal, she heard Thomas telling Margot that he had to be heading home himself.
Big surprise.
Couldn't her mother see that there were absolutely no sparks between them?

No, of course not. According to Margot, sparks were "overrated." But all Lonnie had to do was think about the excitement she felt when she was near Dominick, and she knew her mother was wrong. Sure, she understood that the hot thrill of a relationship wasn't forever, and passion fizzled over time. Still, was there something wrong with wanting it, at least in the beginning? If she and Thomas went to bed tonight, they'd both fall asleep before they got their clothes off.

"Are you sure you won't take some leftovers?" Margot called out the door, as Thomas walked to his car. "Bye, bye! Thanks again for coming!" Lonnie leaned in the archway, watched her mother wave good-bye to her dream son-in-law... and primed herself for one hell of a confrontation.

"Well," Margot said calmly, "that's that, I guess." She moved briskly into the dining room to clear the rest of the dishes. Hmm...
Interesting.
If Margot wasn't angry that Lonnie had been withdrawn during dinner, that could only mean one thing: she knew Lonnie had a case to be furious, so she was avoiding opening up any kind of discussion. Undoubtedly, Jack had warned her against the whole idea, and now she didn't want Lonnie coming down on her, too. Unfortunately, that was just too damn bad!

She went into the dining room, where her mother was gathering up the casserole dish and serving spoon, and averting her eyes obviously. Finally, Lonnie sucked in a breath and said with stony fierceness, "Mom, what you pulled tonight was probably the most out-of-line thing you've ever done. You manipulated me, you embarrassed me, and you embarrassed Thomas. And you had no right."

Margot's eyes widened in tortured bafflement. Ever the martyr. "I was just trying to help. Don't start on me, all right? I've got a headache." She started to push past and go into the kitchen, but Lonnie blocked her.

"I'm not done yet."

"Wha—? Lonnie, I told you I have a headache and I don't want to fight."

"Mother,
shut up!"
Margot's eyes bugged out in horror, and Lonnie took advantage of her shock. "Do not
ever
interfere in my love life like that again, do you understand me? Yes, you gave birth to me, and yes, that gives you certain rights. But you do
not
have the right to control my life. And you do
not
have the right to make whatever hurtful, passive-aggressive comments you want! I'm a grown woman, and I think I've earned some respect by now. If you can't give me that, then I'm not going to visit you at all!"

Lonnie turned on her heel and stormed toward the front door. "Wait!" Margot called after her. "Wait!" she cried again, and captured her daughter's hand just as it was turning the knob on the front door.

Margot expelled a breath and said, "Honey, I just want you to find a nice man who will treat you well. What's wrong with that?" There was no way her mother was that obtuse. She just didn't have any arguments to cling to at the moment. Margot continued. "I just want you to find a nice boyfriend—"

"I have a nice boyfriend!"

"What? Oh, no—you're back together with Terry?" She looked queasy just thinking about Terry and the lack of husband potential he represented.

"No, I'm not with Terry," Lonnie said. "I have a new boyfriend. But he doesn't have anything to do with this." She let out a heavy, frustrated sigh. "This doesn't change anything that I just said. If Dominick dumps me tomorrow, that doesn't make your insane, lunatic meddling okay. Do you
get
that?"

"You never mentioned a Dominick before—"

"Mom."

"What, you have a new boyfriend, and you don't even tell me?"

"Because I can't tell you! Because of
this.
This—what you did tonight! You just put all this pressure on things. You make it impossible to just feel safe—to just feel
good enough.
Why, Mom? Why do you have to do that?"

Margot stared silently for a moment, with her mouth agape, before she responded. "I—I don't make you feel good enough? You're my jewel. You're perfect, and you make me so proud."

Some of Lonnie's anger receded as she realized that her Machiavellian mother was just never going to get it. She said wearily, "Mom, just tell me you're not going to do anything like this ever again. Please."

"Okay. Yes. I promise." Margot paused, and then must have realized that Lonnie expected more in the way of an apology. "Really, honey, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you tonight. I honestly thought it would go better."

"It doesn't matter what your intentions were. That's the point," Lonnie stated firmly. "I don't want you interfering like that again. Ever."