Poison Heart (18 page)

‘Suppose,’ I answered doubtfully.

Luke gazed skywards and I had the strongest urge to wrap my arms around him again. It’s only Luke, I told myself, but tonight it was as if someone else had taken his place. It was utterly bewildering.

‘Is that the North Star, Kat?’

I looked at him askance. ‘I don’t have a clue.’

‘Something else that might spook you.’ He smiled. ‘If this part of the graveyard is north-facing, then it’s called the Devil’s side.’

‘You’re not serious?’ I burst out. ‘Why?’

‘It’s where the unbaptised, suicides and the excommunicated used to be buried in unmarked graves.’

This seemed so horribly sad and I didn’t want to stay any longer. It was time to put some distance between the two of us. My voice was clipped. ‘We really should go. I shouldn’t have brought you here tonight – it was just a stupid whim.’

‘Kat, look at me.’ Luke’s voice made me stop in my tracks and turn slowly around. His face displayed none of the usual jokiness. ‘Tonight was kind of … different … but it has to stop here. I’m worried about you.’

‘I don’t really believe in all this,’ I fibbed. ‘It was just a good yarn to impress my favourite journalist.’

He wasn’t fooled. ‘Come on, Kat. Promise me you’ll let all this go,’ he begged. ‘Thomas Winter and his decrepit house and all the other supernatural past-life stuff?’

‘I promise,’ I answered solemnly, and meant it. Luke was right, this was all much too crazy to dwell on any longer and there was nowhere left to go with it. I had to give it up.

As we got back into Luke’s car and left the village I looked back only once, and noticed a black and white timber-framed building on a small incline, encased in scaffolding. Warning notices were attached to the metal gates that blocked access, and it looked like a building site. I remembered the photograph and had no doubts as to its name – ‘Martinwood’, abandoned again.

Sleep was heavy and dreamless that night, so heavy it felt as if I’d never be dragged back to consciousness. Light filtering through my thin bedroom curtains eventually woke me at about ten and I lay under the warmth of my duvet thinking things through. I now knew more about Genevieve. She had a background and a history, which meant that I had more ammunition to fight her. In the cold light of day I wasn’t completely convinced she was capable of murder, but Luke and I had confirmation that she was disturbed and needed help.

‘You look bright this morning,’ Mum trilled as I came downstairs. She studied me critically. ‘But you’ve lost weight … You must try to eat more.’

She insisted on cooking me a proper breakfast, and it felt nice to relax and be waited on. Mum definitely seemed to be making an effort since we’d had our talk. She hadn’t complained nearly as much and had already been to see the doctor to try a new form of therapy. I was optimistic that things were going to improve.

‘Everyone was looking for you yesterday,’ she beamed, setting a plate of scrambled eggs, tomatoes, mushrooms and toast in front of me.

‘Everyone?’

‘Nat, Hannah … Merlin. They couldn’t get hold of you on your mobile and sounded quite frantic.’

My hands flew to my face, remembering my date with Merlin. I hadn’t even contacted him to let him know it was off, but … there would be plenty of time to make it up to him at Nat’s.

‘The reception was awful, Mum, then I lost signal completely and switched off. I was worried about not letting you know how late we’d be.’

‘I don’t fret when you’re out with
Luke
,’ she answered. ‘How was your trip?’

I waved my hand impatiently. ‘It was great, but what did everyone want?’

‘Oh, something about a party.’

I was relieved it wasn’t anything else. ‘Nat’s birthday thing is today. They’ve probably changed the time or something. I’ll ring her later.’

When I turned on my mobile there were eight or nine missed calls and as many texts. One voicemail was from Hannah, high-pitched and excited with lots of background noise. It sounded like, ‘Katy, can’t believe you’re not here, ring me urgently.’ Hannah had always been a bit of a drama queen. I tried her phone, but it was switched off. Merlin and Nat were unavailable as well so it seemed best to
stick to the plan and wander over to Nat’s house at about midday. I noticed Mum in the garden burning the last of the fallen leaves in a small incinerator. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to get rid of the pendant once and for all. When she wasn’t looking I popped it into the funnel to smoulder into dust. Today felt like a definite new beginning for me.

The sky was blindingly blue with whipped-cream clouds and a first frost that lingered, making everywhere look crisply beautiful. I took my time and walked through the park, even stopping to watch ducks foraging for food in the lake and smiling at a little girl throwing bread into the water. Because of Genevieve I’d abandoned my coat and stuffed it at the back of my wardrobe. I wore a thick knitted jumper over a shirt that was tucked into my jeans. My wardrobe wasn’t extensive like Hannah’s, but since my weight loss all my clothes fitted me differently, and I could feel myself gliding along instead of my usual untidy shuffle. It was a heady feeling to be happy in my own skin. On the way I looked for faces in the clouds, which was one of my hobbies, although I’d never tell anyone because it was so weird.

Nat’s house had a strange deserted look about it and the downstairs curtains were still closed. I was left on the doorstep for ages until her mum answered the door.

‘Katy? Goodness. Nat’s still in bed, exhausted. You must be too. I’m surprised you’re up so early.’

I stared at her blankly. It was already after midday. Nat’s cat cushion, wrapped in three sheets of foil paper, was in one hand, and my contribution to the lunch, an enormous strawberry cheesecake, in the other. Nat’s mum seemed to realize that I didn’t know what she was talking about. There was embarrassment on her face as she ushered me in, making soothing noises about waking her daughter to explain. She disappeared upstairs.

Explain what? I was already late. Merlin and Hannah should be here, but the house was deathly quiet: no balloons, no presents strewn about and no cooking smells from the kitchen. A voice called down to me.

‘You can come up now, Katy.’

I climbed the stairs and opened the door a few centimetres. Nat’s bedroom was just like her – messy, colourful and warm; lots of different styles going on that should have clashed but seemed to work well together. The blind was pulled down and I could just about make out a figure lying in the bed. The thought suddenly occurred to me that she must be ill but no one had been able to reach me to let me know. I moved nearer now, taking in her pallor and the dark-circled eyes that could barely focus.

‘You look awful,’ I said sympathetically. ‘Is it flu?’

She put one hand across her forehead and croaked something inaudible.

I rested the present gently on the bed. ‘I should leave you to get some sleep. Sorry about your birthday lunch. We can always do it next weekend.’

‘Katy … don’t go.’

Nat tried to sit up in bed and I peered closely at her. I noticed that her dark eyes were the result of smudged mascara and her paleness was thick make-up, which was also smeared across her pillow. Her hair was a tangled mess and there were bits of coloured streamers nestled inside.

‘I’m so sorry,’ she muttered, taking a large gulp from a glass of water on her bedside cabinet. ‘We tried to contact you loads of times. I knew nothing about it … the party was all a surprise, and Merlin said you were due back in the evening.’

‘Party?’ I questioned. ‘Here?’

‘No … it was at Merlin’s house.’

‘Merlin’s house?’ I repeated, almost falling off the bed in shock.

Nat’s voice returned in a torrent. ‘His mum had a marquee in the garden, some social evening for her students, and Genevieve persuaded her to throw a surprise party for me. Wasn’t that sweet of her? It was all last-minute, and most of the food was leftovers, but …’

She stopped because she must have noticed my reaction. I felt sick with disappointment, envy, hurt, anger and just about every bad emotion I’d ever felt in my whole life. Merlin’s house was amazing, like a stately home, and even more so with him in it. The thought of everyone partying there without me was unbearable – like someone had punched me in the stomach.

‘Where did you go, Katy? We spent, like, forever trying to reach you.’

Something weird had happened to my face. It was tight, as though I was wearing a face pack and couldn’t smile or frown in case it cracked. I could barely open my mouth to speak.

‘I got held up … it couldn’t be helped. Luke and I had to wait around to talk to someone.’ Nat watched me intently and I tried desperately to sound normal and save some little pride. ‘What was the party like then?’

She rubbed her eyes and stretched, a dreamy smile playing around her lips. ‘It was incredible. Merlin’s mum didn’t mind how many people came, and once the word spread the list grew and almost everyone turned up. The night was cold but they had patio heaters and Christmas lights and a live band who could play anything from classical to rock. It was great being outdoors under the moon and stars and dancing on the lawn until four this morning, when I collapsed and had to be carried home … by Adam.’

‘I’m thrilled for you,’ I mumbled, torn between wanting to be genuinely happy for Nat and my own misery.

Her eyes lighted on my badly wrapped present and her face fell. ‘Katy, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know about the party until I got to Merlin’s, and we tried ringing you until late…’

‘It’s fine,’ I replied unconvincingly. ‘It was a lovely surprise and you deserved it.’

‘It would’ve been better with you there.’

I tried to make a noise of gratitude but sounded like a strangled cat.

‘Merlin was in a terrible dilemma – you should know that. He was miserable the whole night.’

‘Was he?’ This made me feel slightly better. It was the thought of Merlin enjoying himself without me that hurt more than anything.

Nat’s phone beeped and she reached over and checked her messages.

‘Sorry I didn’t hear your call,’ she apologized. ‘And here’s a text from Gen.’

I grimaced but she was too busy reading it to notice.

‘Mmm … says she’s put her photos on Facebook already.’

I must be a masochist because when Nat stumbled out of bed to access her computer I didn’t leave but stood behind her, a rictus smile plastered across my face. Grudgingly I had to admit that the photos were great. They weren’t the usual cheesy poses of everyone grinning for the camera or making stupid gestures. Genevieve must have moved, virtually unseen, to capture the atmosphere and mood of the party. My favourites were of Nat, with her eyes closed, blowing out the candles on her birthday cake and one of the marquee at night, surrounded by huge oaks lit up by fairy lights. With relief I realized that none were of Genevieve because she had stayed behind the lens.

‘Wow … they’re so good,’ Nat breathed.

‘They’re OK,’ I admitted, giving her a hug. ‘I’m glad you enjoyed the party, I really am, and don’t feel the least bit guilty. I’ll make sure not to miss your next one.’

Nat moved her mouse to exit, just as the next batch of photos came through. She hesitated and seemed to freeze. My eyes followed hers as she stared at the prominent centrepiece and I couldn’t look away even though I was desperate to. ‘
I’m your worst nightmare
,’ Genevieve had told me the first time we spoke, and that nightmare was right in front of me now, forever imprinted in my mind – Genevieve and Merlin having a slow dance, her arms wound around his neck while he gazed down on her with complete adoration. The worst thing was – it was a look I recognized; it was the way he used to look at me.

‘It was nice of someone to take that photograph,’ I said reproachfully. ‘I’m really glad Merlin missed me so much.’

Nat’s laugh was nervously shrill. ‘That was nothing, Katy. Just a joke right at the end of the night, everyone dancing cheek to cheek like in the old days. We all did the same and swapped partners. Don’t read anything into the photo … Merlin was really pining for
you
.’

But no matter what she said or how she tried to explain, the camera never lied. Genevieve had pointed this out to me and she was completely right. The moment might have lasted only a second, but it was now frozen in time, and when I looked at Merlin it would be all that I’d see. I paced up and down Nat’s bedroom trying to think straight, unable to stop venting my frustration.

‘I know she’s liked Merlin from the start. She couldn’t wait until I was out of the picture to arrange a party and make a move on him.’

‘That didn’t happen,’ Nat replied patiently. She was out of bed now, sitting at her dressing table trying to remove last night’s make-up and tame her hair. ‘The party wasn’t planned without you. We expected you back, remember? You told Merlin you’d see him on Saturday night.’

This was true, but it didn’t make me feel any better. ‘I know I did, Nat, but I was held up and
she
knew that would happen.’

Nat turned and faced me with her calm grey eyes. ‘How? A premonition or just telepathy?’

‘I’m not sure,’ I sulked, ‘but she knew. She’s really manipulative, sneaky and just plain …’

I managed to stop myself in time and the word ‘evil’ stayed on my lips. Once again, I’d fallen into the trap of criticizing Genevieve and looking jealous and vindictive. So much for staying cool and playing her at her own game, but she’d hit me right where it hurt most – Merlin. Nat patted her cushioned stool, making room for me to sit beside her. I felt like a five-year-old about to be told off.

‘Look, I know how you feel,’ she began. ‘Genevieve is funny, smart and really pretty and you both seem to like the same things but … she isn’t what you think.’

‘You can’t see the bad in anyone,’ I answered with fondness. ‘That’s your problem. Imagine if it was Adam, how would
you
feel then?’

‘You’ve changed since she came along,’ Nat said, ignoring my comment about Adam. She gave my hair a tug. ‘Remember how much fun we used to have?’