Practically Perfect (45 page)

When Laura was satisfied, Anna assembled the few bits and pieces she cared about in bin liners. The furniture she had stored in the second bedroom, she would leave and let Chloe sort out. It was a shame, really, as Laura had given it to her and she liked some of it. But needs must, and there wouldn’t be room in her car, large though it was, for occasional tables, bookcases and a greyhound. Except for a little painted cupboard that had been in her kitchen in her old house. It didn’t take up much room, after all.

She hadn’t packed the car but she’d made decisions about what she was taking and what was staying. An hour or so later she was lying in bed, considering her choices, trying hard not to think about Rob. Trying not to think about someone only meant you thought about them more, she knew that. But she couldn’t drag her brain away from him. She had nothing else to focus on. At last, the vodka and the World Service took effect and she slept.

She awoke early, having slept rather fitfully. But being up at six gave her a start on the world. She had a very long day ahead of her, after all.

The first thing was to collect Caroline. Geoff would be
about
. He was a farmer and would be up with the dawn, that’s what they did. She had loaded the car the night before, leaving the boot for Caroline. It was lined with Anna’s duvet, the one that had once been Laura’s. She was confident of being able to take Caroline, but getting her bedding might be more difficult.

It was seven o’clock when she arrived at the farm. Geoff was there, fiddling with a tractor.

‘Good morning, Geoff!’ she called breezily, although she’d always been rather shy of him before. ‘I’ve just come to collect Caroline. I know it’s early but I’m off today and need to get her.’

He looked at her quizzically.

‘Well, I’m afraid you’ve missed her,’ he said. ‘Rob came and got the dogs last night. Said he had somewhere for them to stay. It’ll be a bit of a squash in the caravan, though.’

Bastard! He must have known she’d try to get Caroline. But why would he want to keep her when he had three dogs of his own?

‘OK then! I’ll go to Rob’s and get her. I’d better hurry or he’ll leave for work.’ She hesitated. ‘He didn’t mention if he was going to work today, did he?’

Geoff shook his head. ‘There’s no knowing with Rob. He could be doing that flexitime thing. And he’s taken leave, I think, to give him time to sort out the fire. Bad business, that.’

‘Terrible,’ she agreed. ‘Now, I really must go. See you soon!’

She got back into her car and drove off, waving gaily out of the window. Quite why she felt she had to give this light-hearted impression to Geoff, she wasn’t sure. ‘It’s probably the social equivalent of whistling a happy tune,’ she said to herself. ‘Goodness, I do hope talking to
oneself
isn’t really a sign of madness. I’ve done nothing but lately.’

She found a lay-by a little way away from the entrance to Rob’s house and parked. She needed to psych herself up. Seeing Rob again was going to be agony, but she’d better get it over with. As she got out and set off along the path she cheered up slightly. He might have gone back to work. Then she could just steal Caroline. A spot of breaking and entering seemed easy compared to confronting Rob.

Quite how she would achieve this she didn’t have to work out because as she reached the clearing she saw the Land Rover and caravan. Rob was standing there, as if he’d been expecting her.

Even being in the physical location of that awful scene was agony. Seeing him there was like a kick in the stomach and made it difficult to breathe.

‘Hello, I’ve come to get Caroline,’ she said, as clearly as she could manage.

Rob started to move towards her and then stopped. ‘Look, Anna, I’m terribly sorry about the other day.’

She became aware of him looking pale and anxious but she couldn’t allow herself to feel compassion: that might weaken her. She wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry. ‘Yes, well, we don’t need to talk about that. Just give me my dog and I’ll be off.’

‘But, Anna’ – he pushed his fingers into his hair in a gesture of frustration – ‘you must give me a chance to explain. I know—’

Anna interrupted him. ‘You were perfectly clear the other day. There’s no confusion.’ She was impressed with how controlled she sounded: almost cold. If only she felt controlled inside.

Rob sighed deeply. ‘Where’s your car?’

‘I left it a little way away. I thought it might be muddy. I didn’t want to get stuck.’ Where this thought came from she didn’t know, but it sounded good.

His eyebrow went up in disbelief. ‘We haven’t had rain for weeks. There’s a hosepipe ban.’

‘Really? How awful. Now, can I have Caroline, please.’

He folded his arms and regarded her in a way that told Anna he was not going to let her have Caroline without a fight. ‘Why do you want her now? Have you bought your new house? That was quick.’

Anna folded her arms, too, and squared up to him. ‘As you know, it’s possible to buy a house very quickly if you know the right people,’ she said. Her voice was still cold but panic was beginning to rise. How much longer could she keep up this brave front?

‘Yes, I do know that, but where is your house?’

‘It’s not anywhere you can reach me! I’m going to Yorkshire, to live near my sister.’

He seemed horrified. ‘Why?’

‘Because I like her! Now could you stop making inane conversation and let me have my dog!’

‘I should point out that technically she’s not your dog. She belongs to the Greyhound Trust. You just have the care of her.’

‘Rob, I’m telling you that if you don’t let me have my dog very soon, I’m going to start to get angry.’ She could have added ‘tearful’ and really hoped he wouldn’t notice.

He shook his head. ‘You can’t just take her out of the county without permission—’

‘Then let me have the permission and then give me my dog!’ She could hear the hysteria in her voice and hoped passionately that he couldn’t.

‘No.’

He was using Caroline as a weapon – a hostage to keep
her
here. It was an outrage. ‘What do you mean: “no”? This is ridiculous.’

An expression Anna couldn’t interpret crossed his features and he seemed to be thinking. ‘Well, yes, it may seem ridiculous,’ he said after a moment, ‘but the fact is, Caroline’s not here.’

‘What do you mean, she’s not here?’ Anna went cold. ‘Where is she? Is she all right? She’s not at the vet’s, is she?’

‘No, she’s not at the vet’s, she’s just – out.’

‘Rob! She’s a dog, she doesn’t go “out”!’ Anna said, almost stamping her foot in frustration. What was he up to now? Devious tactics to weaken the enemy?

‘Well, she did!’ Something that in other circumstances she would have thought was a smile flickered at the corner of his mouth. ‘She said she had to buy shoes. You’re a girl – woman – you’d understand that.’

Anna’s exasperation overtook her anger and despair and she lost a little of her tension. ‘No, I hardly ever buy shoes if I can help it. I just borrow someone’s! And I don’t believe Caroline’s buying them!’ The horror of the fire had obviously driven him mad. There was no other explanation for it.

‘Well, maybe it’s not shoes. It could be something else.’ His head slanted a little, as if in query. ‘Maybe a handbag. But anyway, she told me she doesn’t want to leave me now.’

‘She never said that! She loves me!’ Anna wasn’t sure where this was going but it was very irritating. She just wanted to get Caroline and go. It was so much simpler when he was angry. He wasn’t making it easy for her.

‘Yes, but she’s fallen “in love”,’ Rob went on, as if he was making complete sense. ‘That’s different, isn’t it?’

Anna sighed very deeply. She hadn’t slept well, she’d been up early and was suddenly extremely thirsty. How
much
longer did this pantomime have to go on? ‘Yes it is.’

‘I mean, I love my sister, when I don’t want to murder her but …’ He paused, looking at her in such an intense way she blushed.

‘What?’

‘Never mind.’

This wasn’t good enough. ‘Well, what? Either explain, or let me have Caroline.’ Anna felt her resistance weaken.

‘I’d rather explain over a cup of coffee.’

‘And I’d rather leave here with my dog!’ she persisted, but the fight had gone out of her.

One side of his mouth lifted in a half-smile. ‘As my preference is easier than yours, shall we try it?’

Another piece of the iceberg of her tension broke away as she noticed something behind Rob’s shoulder. She bit her lip to hide her smile. ‘Well, I would really like to say hello to Caroline, who appears to be about to break the door down.’

Abashed, he spun round to see that the caravan door had swung open and Caroline was emerging from it. He turned back to Anna. ‘She must have changed her mind about the shoes.’

Anna didn’t have to reply. Caroline, seeing her, came bounding over, behaving like a puppy, jumping up, licking her face, nearly pushing her off balance in her enthusiasm. To stop herself being knocked over, Anna got on to her knees and flung her arms round her. They hadn’t been away from each other for very long, but she realised how much a part of her life Caroline had become. She sensed tears prickling in her eyes, but also what felt decidedly like a flicker of hope.

Rob put out a hand and pulled her to her feet. ‘Please, come and have some coffee. Let me explain about Caroline’s romance.’

An overpowering need for a cup of coffee weakened her resolve further. As she became more aware of her surroundings, she noticed a brand-new shed near what was left of the house. He must have taken delivery of it just after she’d left last time. She shuddered and then smiled to herself. It did seem as if he was wanting to make peace. And he had a right to a fair hearing, didn’t he? ‘All right,’ she said, ‘as the romance is slightly more likely than a passion for shoes, I will.’

He saw her looking at the shed. ‘That’s Caroline and Dexter’s love nest, although they will have to share it with the other two. If they love each other they won’t mind a bit of hardship or cramped conditions.’ He opened the door to the caravan.

‘I see what you mean about cramped conditions,’ said Anna, finding herself overwhelmed by greyhounds.

‘I’ll put them in their shed. I’ll just get the bedding out of the back of the Land Rover.’

Anna went to help him. She’d have felt awkward sitting in the caravan, waiting for him to come back. ‘Is this yours?’ She indicated the rather battered vehicle that looked as if it was still doing service on cross-country safaris.

‘It’s on a long loan. It belongs to my brother-in-law, who loves off-roading – you know, driving all over the countryside up muddy hills. But my sister doesn’t approve and so she lent it to me.’

‘It is very environmentally unfriendly.’

‘Yes, though he and his mates own the bit of land that they do it on. But now he can come over here and use it whenever he likes and she won’t know.’

‘Oh.’

He handed her a huge, corduroy-covered dog bed and took another himself. ‘These are a present from them both. They’ve been incredibly kind, if a bit irritating at times.’

Anna smiled but didn’t comment. She found her own sister irritating sometimes but would have hated anyone else to agree with her.

Two more fleeces the size of tarpaulins, an old duvet and a collection of sundry stuffed toys (from the nephews, Anna presumed) were all arranged in the shed, which was already warm from the sun, and the greyhounds’ comfort was assured.

Once all four were ensconced in their new surroundings Rob turned to Anna and said, ‘I don’t think we should talk about Caroline and Dexter where they can hear us. They’ll be fine in here for a while.’

Anna followed him back to the caravan. It seemed too small and intimate a space to be in when there was still so much awkwardness between them. On the other hand, in different circumstances, Anna would have found it cosy.

‘Do sit down,’ he said formally, suddenly nervous.

She sat. The dogs couldn’t have been there long, but the place was already covered in dog hairs. She brushed at her trousers, more for something to do than anything else.

‘You see why they have to have separate accommodation, don’t you? Would you like coffee or tea?’ he offered.

‘Coffee, please.’

He handed her the mug a few uncomfortable minutes later. ‘So, are we going to talk about Caroline and Dexter?’ he asked. ‘Although I wouldn’t like them to feel it was an arranged marriage.’

‘Even if you did arrange it?’ She sipped her coffee, staring at the floor.

Rob stood there, taking up most of the tiny space. He bit his lip. ‘Anna, I really want to apologise. I’ve behaved like an absolute idiot.’

She blushed into her coffee, more so when he came and sat next to her. The chemistry was still there. For all that she’d tried to convince herself that she hated him, she still wanted him, quite a lot.

‘I saw your plans,’ he went on. ‘All of them. They’re fabulous. You’ve put a great deal of effort into them.’

She knew that. It must be terribly embarrassing for him having to say all this. He had been utterly vile and got her completely wrong, but now he was making her feel as if he had to tell her she’d failed an exam, although acknowledging she’d worked really hard for it.

She didn’t answer and took another sip of coffee. It was bitter and didn’t have enough milk in it.

‘Why did you spend so much time and energy on my burnt-out shell?’ He took the mug out of her hands and put it down.

She wasn’t going to admit to all her motives but she did owe him some kind of explanation. He had apologised and if she hadn’t got quite so carried away, they would still be friends … She could afford to be magnanimous now, she felt. ‘It was something to do, a project.’ She managed a quick look at him. ‘I’d had an offer accepted on a house, but you know how long these things usually take. I had to do something with my time.’

‘You could perfectly well have started the plans for your own project, or looked for work elsewhere. Why work on mine?’

This time she looked at him for a bit longer. ‘I just thought – I just thought that it was such a dreadful thing to have happened, I had to do what I could – which isn’t much – to put it right. I was trying to be practical.’