Pretend With Me (Midnight Society #1) (6 page)

I looked at him for a moment, not knowing what to say
or how to react. The silence dragged on, and then before I
could figure out how to ease the tension Eric sighed
standing up from my bed, holding out his hand to me.
“We should go... let’s say goodbye to your parents.” I only
stared back at his hand for a moment. Then I stood up,
and walked out of my room, leaving him standing there
alone. Almost immediately he was at my side, and we were
walking down the stairs.
Even though I was angry at my parents for making me
marry Eric, I couldn’t bring myself to not say goodbye to
them. Even if I wished that they’d let me die as a baby,
when I saw my mom I went to her and hugged her tightly,
knowing that from now on I wouldn’t see her every day.
After hugging my dad, I climbed into Eric’s car, and then
we were on our way to the airport
We didn’t talk. Instead, I stared out the window,
watching as everything flashed by. My mind wandered
freely at all that had happened in just three days. I had
gone from broken teen girl to engaged teen girl in just a
second. Almost as if that thought made me sick, nausea
suddenly overtook me and my hand went to Eric, grabbing
onto his leg. “Eric pull over,” I moaned.
“Why?” he questioned and looked over to me.
“Because long drives with assholes make me
nauseous,” I muttered loud enough for him to hear,
dropping my head in my hands. Before the car could come
to a full halt, I was at the side of the road throwing up
everything I had eaten for the day, which wasn’t much.
Once back in the car, exhaustion overtook me and I went
to sleep.
When I woke up, I found myself in a completely dark
bedroom. I couldn’t tell what time of the day it was, or
where I was for that matter. Last night, I had asked Eric
when he woke me up on the plane, but he refused to tell
me. I had been too sleepy to argue so I hadn’t, but now
curiosity was taking me over. Slowly, I climbed out of the
bed, and my feet touched hard, cold floors. I felt my way
around the room, and stopped when my hands made
contact with soft, warm thick curtains. I found the end
yanking it aside, and instantly early morning sun bathed the
room. It took a short while for my eyes to adjust, but once
it did I was utterly blown away by the sight before me.
I was staring directly at the ocean. The soft greenishblue water was transparent even though I was nowhere
close to it. The sand was white and heavenly. I opened the
sliding door, stepping out into warm, skin-kissing sun.
Instantly my feet touched grass, and then I began spinning
around, completely taken in by the view. All around the
house were huge, green trees that loomed over me, except
for the one side that took you directly to the beach. I
stopped when I saw the house, sucking in a breath.
It was the house from the magazine, the one I always
dreamed about. I turned back to the sea, and stood there
for a minute, frozen and shocked at the beauty, as the
strong overbearing sense of déjà vu flooded me. It was like
Eric had reached into my head and pulled out my dream
vacation.
I shook my head in denial, and began backing up into
the house. I couldn’t believe the sight before me. Because
somehow I was here in Hawaii and staying in a house that
I always wanted to come to.
I turned back to the house, ready to slap Eric awake
and demand answers, but once I was back in the room, I
soon forgot about that. The room was gorgeous. The walls
were a soft creamish-white color, and the carpet on the
floor matched and complimented it perfectly. Now that
there was light in the room, I could take in the details
staring back at me. The curtains were thick, and dark
brown which only made the entire room feel homey and
comfortable. All the furniture were made of dark wood,
and looked rich and elegant.
Overall, the room was beautiful, but that was not why I
was anxious. It wasn’t the reason that my heart was stuck
in my throat, and my palms were sweating or why I wanted
to turn, and run from the room screaming as I went. The
reason for all these things were because Eric Wilson was
kneeling in front of me, and in his hand was an open,
small, velvet, teal box showing off a diamond ring.

“Jen,” he began, and I forced myself to swallow the
lump rising in my throat. At this moment I did n’t hear
Eric’s voice that I had grown used to in the short space of
time I'd known him. Instead, I heard an angel singing a
song that sounded like death. “I am only going to do this
once in my life... I’d like to do it right.”

I let out a jagged breath, not knowing how I should
react to him. Should I turn and run? Should I scream at
him? Could I fake fainting? What do I do?

“I know you’re being forced into this, and I know that
right now you don’t even like me... but I want you to know
that I really do care about you... You’re the girl I’m going
to marry - we’re going to spend the rest of our lives
together, and I want us both to be happy. I promise to
love you… that I will never take you for granted and
above all, I will never hurt you... You will never want for
anything, as long as it’s within my reach, I will give you
whatever you want. Will you marry me, Jen?”

I stood there, watching him shocked and confused. I
couldn’t do anything - couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe; I
was trapped in my own body. After a few long,
devastatingly silent seconds I walked up to him, and
plucked the ring from the box without looking at it. It felt
heavy in my hands, like I could barely carry its weight
around.

“I don’t have a choice, Eric,” I muttered, climbing into
the bed behind him. I pulled the covers up until my chest,
placing the ring on the table beside the bed. Then I turned
my back on him.

“So you’re not going to put it on?” he asked, sounding
hurt and offended.
“I can’t,” I whispered, closing my eyes. I felt him climb
into the other side of the bed, and I couldn’t help wanting
to cry. Tears welled up in my eyes, and if I didn’t do
something soon I knew that they would spill out.
My thoughts instantly went to Daren, and I found
myself wishing I was with him. It didn’t matter where; I
just wanted to hear his laugh, his voice. I wanted to feel his
arms around me once more and I wanted him to tell me
that everything was going to be okay.
“You can wear a stupid band from your best friend, but
not an engagement ring from me?” Eric sneered at my
side. Immediately I opened my eyes, and saw his back
leaving the room. My hands made tight fist, and my nails
dug into the middle of my palms.
“Daren died because he was trying to save me!” I
screamed as loud as I could and instantly Eric’s retreating
figure froze. The tears I’d been holding in spilled out
despite doing everything in my power to keep them back. I
wanted nothing more than to run from the room, but
something held me to the bed. I didn’t think I could move.
Then before Eric could turn and see me crying, I pulled
the covers over my head hoping to vanish between the
sheets.
Moments later, I felt his weight on the bed again. He
didn’t attempt to pull the covers off me, and for that I was
thankful. Instead, he wrapped an arm around my body
tightly, pulling me into his chest. I didn’t move away – I
didn’t want to shatter into tiny shreds, and I was sure that
even the slightest movement was going to break me.
All I could think about right now was the night that he
died... seeing him take his last breaths, wishing with
everything I’d had inside me that I could save him. I would
have done anything for that. I would have sold my soul to
the Devil if it would have saved Daren’s life.
I could see it in my head, playing like a movie stuck on
repeat. The darkness had been all around me. I’d heard the
police sirens, and the scared yet excited shouts of my
schoolmates as they’d scattered about outside. My hands
had kept banging on the door as I’d shouted for someone
to let me out, but no one had been paying attention to me.
Yet still, I’d kept banging on the door as hard as I could.
Suddenly, it’d swung open, and without a moment of
hesitation, I’d dashed out from one dark room to another,
into a mass of screaming and thrilled teens. Using all the
strength I’d had in me, I’d shoved my way through the
crowd, going the opposite direction of everyone else. I’d
been so tired - my entire body had been sore and aching,
yet I wouldn’t stop. I had to get to him as fast as I could -
it was the only thought that kept me going.
The lights above flickered on, and for a moment I
stood there being shoved in all angles by faces I knew.
Tears ran down my cheeks as I pushed through the crowd,
making my way to the stairs. I heard a familiar voice
shouting my name over the crowd, but it was not his voice
so I didn’t bother looking back.
Finally, I got to the stairs and started to climb. My
movements were rash and ungraceful, making me stumble
and then fall face first into the staircase. My head
connected to one of the steps, and for a second the world
blackened as my eyes rolled to the back of my head, but I
couldn’t stop. I forced myself up, and got to the corridor
then ran to the last room. My breath caught when I shoved
the door open, and my eyes found him. Almost instantly,
the strong, unpleasant stench of blood hit my nose. It was
like a solid punch to the chest as I stood there frozen,
horrified at the sight. More tears rolled down my face, and
slowly I began to walk to him more afraid than I’d ever
been.
“Oh my God...” I cried, my hands flying to my mouth.
I went down at his side, cradling his head in my lap. “Oh
my God.” I didn’t want to touch him anywhere. I was too
afraid if I did I would only hurt him. He seemed so broken
and fragile now, and all I saw was blood pouring out of his
chest. “Oh my God,” I cried again. I didn’t recognize my
own voice.
“Jen,” he breathed out, and my head snapped up to
look at his face. Tears blinded me, and I shook my head,
spilling them. “Jen you need to leave... now...”
“No,” I whimpered. “I’m not leaving you,” I shook my
head again, clearing tears. “I’m not leaving you, I’m
staying.” It didn’t matter if the police came and hauled me
off to prison, or Zane and his friends came back to finish
what they started with me. I didn’t care. Nothing mattered
anymore.
He grabbed my hand, pulling me towards him.
“Jenifer... Kate... Carson,” he sighed weakly, using my full
name, “leave now or I will haunt you when I’m dead.”
“As long as you're with me... I won't care,” I cried as
the police sirens got louder. This was good, help was
coming.
Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I jumped at
the touch. Everything inside me recoiled at being touched.
“Jen!” It was Danny, the owner of the voice that had
been calling out to me while I was shoving my way up the
stairs. “Jen come on, we need to go!” He was frantic.
“No!” I screamed, not taking my eyes off Daren.
“It’s okay, Jen,” Daren smiled, gripping my hand
tighter. “Everything will be fine, I promise,” he whispered,
and as simple as a candle burning out, his eyes went cold.
His hand loosened, falling from mine, and just like that he
was gone.
I sat there in silence staring at him. What was
happening? I didn’t understand anything – nothing made
any sense. I felt like I was drunk – like the world was
spinning around me and I couldn’t keep up. Suddenly I
couldn’t breathe anymore; I was drowning.
“No!” I heard someone shriek using my voice. “Wake
up! Daren wake up now!” I heard an ear piercing, shattered
scream, and it was only when someone pulled me up and
clamped a hand over my mouth I realized it was me. I was
screaming.
I fought against the person holding me – my mind had
gone back hours earlier. My nails dug into skin. I was
suddenly facing him and he was shaking me forcefully.
“Jen, open your eyes! It’s me, Danny.” He stopped shaking
me then, and I could feel his eyes boring a huge gaping
hole into my face. I turned my head to the side, still
keeping my eyes shut, not wanting to see anything.
“I don't know what they did to you,” his voice was
angry, hard, and protective. My eyes flashed open and I
found myself staring into his face. “But we need to go,” he
whispered. “I called the police, we can’t stay here. They
can’t find us here.” His voice was urging me to
understand, but I couldn’t. I didn't know if he was talking
about the police finding us or Zane. Either way, though,
leaving Daren was not an option.
“No, I’m not leaving him,” I shouted, but before I
could finish I was being dragged out of the room. All the
way I heard myself screaming.
“Daren!” I shouted flying up to find myself lying on the
bed, back in the room. My hand was stretched out in front
of me and my face was wet with tears from the dream. I
still couldn’t breathe.
Eric was instantly at my side. He placed a hand on my
shoulder and instinctively I recoiled at his touch, slapping
his hand away. I was off the bed instantly, my back pressed
against a wall. The lights flashed on, and it was then that I
let out a breath. But relief didn’t come – it was just that, a
breath.
“It’s fine,” he whispered, slowly walking up to me. He
then hugged me and I felt myself stiffen. He felt it too,
because he released me and took my good hand, leading
me back to the bed. “What happened?” he asked at my
side.
I pulled my hand back wiping away the tears and sweat
from my face. It took me long, indecisive minutes to
answer, and when I did my voice didn’t sound like my
own. “I dreamed him.” Eric nodded at once.
“How long ago...” he trailed off and I instantly
understood what he was asking.
“Three weeks...” I muttered looking past him.
“What happened?”
“He was murdered... I held him in my arms... I begged
him to stay with me, would have given anything for it…”
“I’m sorry,” Eric whispered, sitting beside me and
pulling me into his arms again. I didn’t tense t his time, but
I didn’t react either. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” I shook my head. I didn’t want to talk about it. I
didn’t even want to remember.
“It’s okay Jen,” he whispered. My head snapped up
instantly. “Everything will be –”
“Don’t.” My voice was barely a whisper. “Don’t say it.
Don’t promise that everything will be fine, Eric... The last
person who said that died...” He nodded and laid me on
the bed, and for the second time in one morning, I fell
asleep listening to his breaths come and go.
When I awoke, I was alone in the room and I sat up
looking around. Without Eric the room felt huge and
empty, but I would never tell him that. Almost as if he
could hear my thoughts, he walked into the room shaking
water drops off his hair, and wearing only pants.
Obviously, he’d just showered. His wet towel was hanging
over his shoulder, barely covering his chest. Water drops
fell from his hair, rolling down his naked chest, making
him look glorious in every way.
“Did I wake you?” he asked when he saw me w atching
him. “I’m sorry, I just came in for a shirt.”
“No, you didn’t,” I sighed, not taking my eyes of his
shirtless body. God he was gorgeous. How could he be
that appealing? It wasn’t fair.
He stopped dead in his tracks and stared at me
confused. “Why are you staring? Do I have something on
me?” He was abruptly horrified.
“No,” I sighed again, this time looking down at the
covers, trying not to blush. If only he could tell what was
running through my mind right now...
“Jen...” he said, sitting down on the edge of the bed
and something in his voice made me look up to him. “I
have to leave, but I won’t be long, I swear.”
“Where are you going?” I asked trying to be as normal
as I could about this, but I didn’t want to be alone here.
Not after that dream...
“I’m meeting a friend... Well she’s more of an old
acquaintance really,” he replied awkwardly. My eyebrows
rose at this.
“So,” I mused trying to be as casual as I could. “How
do you know her?” I could ask that, right?
“Hmm,” he considered, “well I’ve known
about
Katalin since I was born, I guess. Kind of like you.”
“Okay,” I muttered and got out of the bed, walking out
of the bedroom and towards the beach. I didn’t go far;
instead I sat down on the sand, as close to the forest’s edge
as I could, closing my eyes as the wind blew around me.
There was a soft, cold bite in the air and in response, I
wrapped my arms around myself as shivers ripped through
me, folding my legs so that my knees met my chest. There
was nothing I wanted more than to curl up into a bal, and
just vanish. I knew I was being foolish but I felt trapped,
and it wasn’t just the marriage with Eric; it was everything.
There were so many questions and no answers to keep
them company. For one, who was Eric, really? I knew that
he was rich, that his family was well-known and powerful,
but that was all. Why had my parents kept this from me?
Why did this marriage have to be now? Why not when
both Eric and I were older? I was seventeen and he was
twenty. How did he know to bring me here? And those
were just the questions that had been staring at me. I was
sure that if I thought about this some more there would be
others, harder ones.
I felt as if my life had been plunged into total darkness,
and I was stumbling about lost and confused. I had been
feeling so ever since that night... It was like... when Daren
died, he had taken my sight with him, leaving me blind.
For so long he had made everything in my life seem
sane and now that he was gone, I was puzzled and alone,
and no matter how hard I tried to break free - the more I
fought and struggled - was the more blinding the darkness
became. Sometimes I felt like I was still trapped in the
closet they had locked me in. And I was still banging on
that door, screaming as loud as I could, but no one even
turns my way.
Without realizing it, I had started to cry. I wiped the
tears from my face, but as soon as it was gone more spilled
out. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, then
another, and another, but no matter how many breaths I
took, I wouldn’t stop crying.
When I did finally stop, I stood up numbly and started
to make my way back at the house. Eric was still gone and
it felt empty and cold without him. The house was
gorgeous, just as I imagined it would be. The door to the
room, which was the master, opened up to the kitchen,
dining room, and living room. There were two other
bedrooms, meant for kids by the looks of it and two toilets
and baths including the one in the master bedroom.
After I had finished touring the house, Eric still wasn’t
back yet so I decided on a shower. The only problem was
that I couldn’t find my clothes. All I found were Eric’s
clothes, still wrapped neatly in clear plastic bags and
smelled brand new. I made up my mind that he wouldn’t
mind, and even if he did, I’m sure that I wouldn’t care.
By the time I was done, my belly was practically
screaming to be fed. I opened the cupboards and fridge,
and found they were filled with every type of food I could
imagine.
This was perfect - I loved cooking, as long as there
wasn't anyone around to bug or direct me. I was too
hungry for anything extravagant, so I settled for a butter
and cheese pasta. In a rush I got out all the ingredients and
got to work, munching on cheese bits.
While the pasta was cooking, I dug out Daren's iPod
and connected it to the dock, turning up the volume as
loud as it could go. Soon the entire house was pulsing with
music, and against every painful thing in my life I found
myself singing and dancing to the songs.
I had just finished straining the macaroni and was
mixing in the cheese and butter when I felt someone lay a
hand on my shoulder. Instantly, panic flooded me and I
spun around, using the wooden spoon as my weapon.
“Holy fuck,” I breathed out when I saw Eric standing
in the kitchen, staring at me sheepishly. Every part of me
was shaking, my heart hammered away in my chest, and
my pulse was going crazy in my veins. Then mixing in with
the fear I felt pure anger at him, but moments later I really
saw Eric and all the annoyance drained away. He was
covered in my mixture of melted cheese and butter. It was
splattered on his face and arms, staining his t-shirt and I
couldn't help but grin at the sight before me.