PRIDE: A Bad Boy and Amish Girl Romance (The Brody Bunch#1) (48 page)

The Moores returned with a wave of applause for the band washing behind them. Only a few seconds later, Harrison cut through the crowd, a look of determination on his face as his right hand fiddled at the buttons on his coat jacket. Clarice watched him with a curious look, but he only stared at the ground as he approached.

“Harrison, darling,” said Vanessa, as he came up behind Clarice’s seat. “Are you quite alright? You look pale as death. It’s not the food in this dreadful place, is it?”

George shook his head instantly, wiping his mouth. “Come now, dear, Harrison would never hire inferior chefs.”

Clarice felt Harrison at her back. Slowly, his big hands slid up her arms and came to rest on her shoulders. Instantly she felt lighter, and lifted one of her hands up to place on his.

“It’s not the food, mum,” said Harrison. “I’m not ill.”

“Then what’s gotten into you, leaving your fiancée on the dance floor? Where are your manners?”

“Apologies, darling,” said Harrison to Clarice. He leaned down and planted a firm peck on her cheek. “I wasn’t myself there for a moment, not after you told me the news. I simply had to get some fresh air.”

Clarice squeezed his hand as an acceptance of his apology. But then his words slowly dawned on her. She almost spilled out the question — what news was he talking about? — but before she could, Harrison’s grip on her shoulders tightened ever so slightly, a clear signal to her.

“News? What news?” asked Vanessa. “We thought you might be taking a call, is it serious?”

“No, mum. Clarice told me some incredible news as we were dancing, and I just… I became overwhelmed.” Harrison smiled down at her, and Clarice tried to mimic it, but she knew there were questions in her eyes.

“What is it?” asked George.

“Father, mum… you’re going to be grandparents. Clarice told me she is expecting.”

The words rang in Clarice’s ears so loudly that she could barely register the sound of the band, the cheering of the crowd, or the ecstatic outburst of Vanessa as she scurried up from her chair to embrace her son and new, soon-to-be daughter. It was like she had cotton stuffed in her ears; like all the glitter and lights were a million miles away.

She only sat there in the chair with a forced smile while Vanessa wrapped her in an excited embrace. Above her, Harrison shook hands with his father. When he glanced back down to her, there was sadness and apology in his eyes, but it wasn’t enough.

In that moment, all Clarice felt for Harrison was rage.

M
aybe it was
because the night had reached such emotional heights, but once he saw the look of anger on Clarice’s face, Harrison felt a deep and ugly darkness rise up in his heart, as if he had taken a nose dive from that height and fallen hard. She had a cold steel in her eyes that was so far removed from the care and even love he had felt before that it almost made him literally shiver, right then and there in the ballroom.

As his parents descended into blind emotional celebration, Harrison realized the weight of what he had done, and found himself screaming internally for a way out. He watched helplessly as his mother wrapped Clarice in her arms, pressing their faces together and giving her pecks that left soft pink lipstick smears on Clarice’s pale skin.

Clarice was a queen, as always, and it was only Harrison who could see the cracks in her expression that betrayed the reality of her emotions. On the surface, she was smiling and loving to her new parents, even when Harrison’s mother started patting her flat tummy and listing off all the food products and activities Clarice would now have to avoid.

“Why’d you let us serve her champagne?” scolded his father, lifting up the bottle and shaking it towards Harrison.

“Dear, he didn’t know!” chimed his mother. “And anyway, it’s very early, isn’t it? Find me a woman who hasn’t enjoyed spirits before she found out she was carrying and I’ll find you a liar!” She squeezed Clarice again. “She will be more careful from now on, won’t you, dear?”

Clarice gritted her teeth and smiled. “Of course, mother. We couldn’t be happier about this.”

“This calls for a celebration,” said his father.

Harrison couldn’t ignore the intense anger he saw in Clarice’s eyes. It was as if he could hear her thoughts in his head, and right now, those thoughts were telling him very clearly that staying in this place and celebrating his newest lie was the last thing she wanted to do.

“Father, hold off on that,” said Harrison with a palm up. “To be frank, Clarice is feeling a little weak this evening. I think it would be best if we turned in early to let her get some rest.”

Instantly the mood changed from celebratory to worrisome. “What’s wrong? Shall I fetch the doctor? You do have a night doctor on staff, don’t you, Harrison?”

Harrison swallowed an impulse to return the barb. “Of course, but it’s not all that serious, is it darling?” He leaned over to look at Clarice, trying to explain with his eyes this sudden change of plan.

Clarice picked up on it very quickly. “No, of course not.” She put one hand on her tummy and the other on her clavicle. “It’s just a little hot in here, to be honest, and all this excitement from this whole week, and sharing the news… I think I’m just a bit overwhelmed.”

His mother squeezed her into another hug. “You take your rest, nothing is more important than your health! Harrison, get her to bed this instant.”

“On your command, mum,” said Harrison with a half-smile. He helped Clarice out of her chair and offered her a strong arm to walk on. “Darling, let’s get you back to the suite and order you some ice cream.”

Both his mother and father gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek before they would let them depart from the ballroom. As soon as they were through the gilded double-doors, Clarice dropped Harrison’s arm, picked up the skirt of her dress, and stalked down the hall at a faster pace to get ahead of him. The anger she left in her wake was palpable, and when Harrison saw the look on her face as she stared at him in the lift car, anxiously pressing the
Close Door
button before he could follow, he decided he would swing by the bar for a moment and take a few shots before he faced the disaster he had so deftly created.

She needed some time, and he really needed a drink.

H
arrison entered the penthouse slowly
, carefully. The bedroom lights were glowing, but everything else was dark. Through the windows he could see the glittering of the weekly luau on the beach, and the slow-moving lights of boats on the water.

He undid his tie and let it hang in loose ends around his neck. “Clarice? Are you here?” he said.

She didn’t answer right away. He made moves towards the bedroom to look for himself, but she appeared suddenly in the doorway, still in her beautiful golden dress. Backlit by the bedroom light, her hard stance and angry face made her look like an ancient goddess of war, ready to rain her wrath down on him.

And he deserved it.

“Got a lot of nerve coming back here,” she said.

“I came back to talk,” he said. “Not to pretend like it didn’t happen. Give me some credit, will you?”

Her face said she was not going to be giving up an ounce of free credit this evening. “So talk,” she said, folding her arms across her chest. “What the hell was that? What were you thinking?”

Harrison realized he actually hadn’t asked himself yet why he did it, and when he went groping for an answer now, all he felt were ugly emotions he didn’t want to investigate with any clarity. They were slippery and complicated. “I’m sorry, Clarice. I really am. It was a stupid move, I just… I panicked.”

“Panicked? Why? Everything was going just fine,” she said, waving her arms. “If anything, you just jeopardized everything we’ve done this week trying to get you out of this mess. You realize that, right?”

He sighed. “I know.”

“You’re going to have a much harder time explaining what happened to a fiancée
and
your
unborn child
once this little charade is done and I’m back home. If it was just me, we could break up, but a baby? Your parents are never going to let you just abandon your child!”

“I know,” he said, firmer this time. “I don’t need you to tell me what my parents will do, alright? I know damn well what will happen.”

“Then why the hell did you do it, Harrison? Why did you leave me out there hanging like that? I mean, fuck, if you wanted to pretend a baby was a part of this, why didn’t you just
tell me
?” she said.

“What do you mean?”

Clarice paused. She had a look on her face, like she had misstepped and said something she didn’t mean to, but he didn’t understand what. “I thought… I thought we trusted each other, you and I,” she said. “I thought we were in on this plan together as
partners
. If you needed me to do something different I would have done it. But you just threw me under a bus out there, Harrison, and made me scramble to react. I could have fucked up the whole thing, and it’s like you don’t even care.”

Harrison couldn’t meet her eyes when she said that. He stared at his feet and felt the most naked vulnerability he had ever felt in his life. At least since Anastasia. “Well, maybe I don’t care.”

“Come again?” said Clarice, folding her arms. “Maybe you don’t care about what?”

“About fucking it up.”

“What?” she said, shaking her head. “Am I drunker than I thought? Because this whole thing was your idea, to save your life, remember? Why would you want to fuck it up?”

Harrison’s emotions came charging up through his body like a tsunami he didn’t even hear coming. He stalked closer to her. “I don’t fucking know, alright? I just… something’s happening to me, Clarice, and I don’t understand it. We were out on that dance floor and talking about the plan and you leaving back for New York and I just… it was like my mind just went blank, I couldn’t think of anything else.”

“Anything else but what?” said Clarice. “Harrison, I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

“I don’t know either, Clarice. Something just, it came over me. Something big and furious that forced me to listen, and so I just went for it. Like part of me just… just wanted to say it. I wanted to stand there and have that experience, telling them that this beautiful wife of mine was carrying my child. I saw that moment and I took it.”

Clarice froze. There was an emotion on her face that Harrison didn’t have a name for, but it pained his heart to look at. Sadness built like a quiet storm in her clear blue eyes. Her chest rose and fell in silent breaths.

“Clarice,” he said, if only to break the silence. “I’m sorry, alright? I’m sorry I did it. It was stupid of me, and I should have trusted you. I fucked up. I am a fuck up.”

Clarice watched him carefully. Her lips moved like she wanted to say something, but couldn’t find the words. She took a deep breath and said softly, “I think you should go, Harrison.”

Harrison flinched as if he had been slashed with a blade. Her words hurt far worse than he could have anticipated. But he knew he didn’t have a leg to stand on. She was right to want space.

He averted his eyes, unable to take the pain and blame on her beautiful face. He only nodded at her, muttered another apology, and then left their honeymoon penthouse.

C
larice found
the girls at the Emerald Pool, an enormous shallow pool with crystal water and a swim-up bar that was by far one of the most popular spots in the whole resort. The sun was beginning its descent behind the tall curved peaks of the island cliffs, setting the sky on fire in brilliant shades of orange and pink that Clarice knew she would never see on her side of the world. A giant flock of gorgeous white water birds took flight just outside the resort’s walls and called out in happy song over the jungle as they went.

Liz was the first to spot Clarice, and she waved her over to a stool they had saved just for her. The week had obviously been full of fun for all of them, because the ladies looked relaxed and even a little worn out from their adventures.

Clarice sighed as the warm water enveloped her body. “Christ, I didn’t know how badly I needed this.”

“Welcome to the party, senorita,” said Trudy as she gave her a sideways hug. “Where’ve you been?”

Clarice made a big huffing noise. “I don’t even want to talk about it. What are we drinking?”

“They’re called
Adios Motherfuckers
,” said Sophie with a hiccup. She held up a glass full of bright blue drink. “And they are not fucking around.”

“I’ll take four,” she muttered, before waving the bartender down and putting in a more realistic order of just one of the blue drinks. And a shot of rum.

“I’m sorry, miss, but I’m afraid I can only offer you our virgin selections,” said the bartender.

Clarice started. “Excuse me? Did you run out of booze or something?”

“No, no,” the bartender flushed red. He was a skinny ginger thing with a British accent even thicker than Harrison’s. “It’s my instructions, you see. Mr. Moore’s orders.”

“Harrison said I can’t drink?” said Clarice. Anger instantly rose in her heart at the thought that Harrison would try to be petty with her over their argument. She hadn’t spoken with him since he left the penthouse an hour ago. She only called up her girls and told them it was time to get drunk.

“No, not Harrison, miss—Mr. George Moore,” said the bartender. “For his future grandchild, he’s told us to make sure not to give you any alcohol.”

Clarice’s mouth dropped open and her face turned red, giving the bartender a chance to slip away and serve other customers. On the stools next to her, all the girls slowly turned to look at her with questioning, wide eyes.

“His
future grandchild
?” said Liz, hitting every syllable hard.

“Goddamn it,” said Clarice. She put her head in her hands.

“What in the what is going on,” said Sophie. “Did I miss something? Are you
knocked up
, Clarice?”

“No, of course I’m not,” said Clarice. “Babies take months to make, remember?”

“What the hell is the deal? You owe us details, and you owe them now,” said Trudy. “Plus, I need to know what’s got your mood so rotten. I’m going to take a guess it has to do with this, uh… unplanned pregnancy.”

Clarice sighed and gave a look to Trudy. “If you get me a real goddamn drink, I’ll tell you everything.”

The girls left the pool and found a quiet corner of the poolside to camp out in their own comfy davenports. Sophie and Liz returned alone to the bartender and ordered enough drinks for their whole party without telling the bartender Clarice was with them. Clarice happily took the shots of rum, and a few big gulps of the heavy blue drink, before she looked up and saw them gathered around, waiting for her to spill her guts.

“What all has Trudy told you?” asked Clarice.

“Duh, everything she knows,” said Sophie with an eye roll and a sip of her drink. “You’re playing pretend fiancée to that gorgeous British stud while his parents are visiting and you’re getting a sweet payday to do it.”

“Right,” said Clarice. “Harrison.”

“Such a babe,” said Liz to Trudy, who nodded heartily.

Sophie put a hand on Clarice’s knee. “So what’s wrong? Is the plan not working?”

“No, it’s… it’s working grandly,” said Clarice with a harsh voice. “That’s the problem.”

“I don’t follow, sweetheart.”

Trudy started laughing, her eyes to the sky. “Oh my lord, Clarice Blackburn. Are you telling us what I think you’re trying to tell us?”

Of course Trudy understood what was happening, Clarice thought. She always could see through Clarice like she was made of silk. “What is it you think I’m trying to tell you?”

“Don’t you play coy now,” said Trudy.

“Wait, wait, so are you really pregnant or what?” interrupted Liz.

“No, of course I’m not pregnant,” said Clarice with a dramatic gesture to her alcoholic drink. “I’m also not a monster. The pregnancy thing is… was part of the ruse. Harrison told his parents at the dinner last night that I was pregnant, and he didn’t warn me he was going to do it first. I almost wrecked the whole thing, I was so furious at him. It was such a dumbass move. He’s jeopardized the whole plan, now.”

“Why the hell did he do that?” asked Trudy.

Clarice sighed. “I honestly don’t know, Trude. One minute, we were out on the dance floor having a fine time. Then Harrison got all weird and upset, and excused himself to the men’s room. And when he came back, he just… blurted it out that I was pregnant with their grandchild.”

“Nice,” said Liz with an eye roll. “It’s like men never think ahead.”

“What did you do?” asked Sophie.

“The Moores were so goddamn happy, and we were in a room full of cheering people, what was I supposed to do? I just stood there like an idiot as his mother rubbed my stomach, trying to swallow my anger so that no one knew anything was wrong. Then I bitched out Harrison back in the room.” She shook her head and took a deep drink of the blue stuff. The feeling of alcohol warming her muscles was a welcome change from the tension of the last twelve hours.

“That’s intense,” said Liz.

“I think this has gotten away from you, hun,” said Trudy.

“What do you mean?”

Trudy sat down on the thick arm of the chair Clarice sat in and put an arm around her shoulders. “Are you really going to pretend you don’t see what’s going on here?”

Some part of her heart clenched up at Trudy’s words; some part of her heart that was afraid of the truth. Clarice swallowed and blinked at her friend.

“I’m not pretending, I really don’t see what’s going on here,” said Sophie.

Liz suddenly softened and let out compassionate coo. “Oh, no… Clarice, you’re in love with him, aren’t you?”

Hearing it out loud was too much. Tears welled in Clarice’s eyes before she could do anything to stop it, and she started to sob uncontrollably. Trudy scooted her over so she could wrap her arms around her best friend, while Liz and Sophie slid closer to create a circle to block her emotional moment from the prying eyes of the other guests. The girls let her cry until she didn’t have any more tears left.

Clarice leaned against Trudy’s shoulder, her eyes puffy and swollen. “Man, I sure am a fun vacation guest.”

“Hey, this has hands down been the craziest, most fun vacation I’ve ever been on,” said Liz. “You didn’t do a damn thing to wreck that.”

“We’re just worried about you, sweetheart,” said Sophie. “You’re supposed to go home feeling better, not worse.”

“I know,” sniffled Clarice. “I feel like such an idiot. I should have known better than to think I could just… pretend to do something like this. Not with Harrison. He’s not the man I thought he was when we first got here.”

“What do you mean?” said Trudy.

“He’s a good man. He’s kind and decent and sweet… when we’re together, it’s like he can’t keep himself away from me. He genuinely likes me, you guys, in a way I’ve never felt before. In fact, Harrison makes my past boyfriends seem like they didn’t enjoy me at all. Like I was just someone to pass the time and fuck, someone to keep them from being lonely. Harrison doesn’t treat me like that and I don’t…” She could feel her emotions rising again, and the tears coming with them. “I don’t want to leave him. I love him.”

“Honey,” said Trudy with a hug.

Sophie sniffled, a few tears popping out of her blue eyes. “That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“But he acted like a total dick last night,” reminded Liz. “You have to be able to trust the man you’re with, Clarice, and Harrison broke your trust last night by leaving you out to dry with that pregnancy lie.”

Clarice shook her head. “You’re not wrong, Liz. And I told him that. Trust me, I told him very hard. But… but he was so immediately apologetic. He didn’t even try to make an excuse for it. He said he just got upset during our dance and it was like something came over him he couldn’t stop.”

“Upset about what?” asked Trudy.

“I don’t know,” said Clarice. “We were just dancing, talking about things. I told him it was going to be weird to take the engagement ring off because I was getting used to its weight, and that’s when he left to go to the men’s room.”

Trudy shared a look with Liz. “Clarice, c’mon. Isn’t this obvious? Harrison is totally devastated that you’re leaving and he acted out.”

“Be serious,” said Clarice, wiping tears from her face.

“I am being serious,” said Trudy. “You make a comment about how this little fairy tale is about to blow up, and Harrison basically runs off, and then comes back and makes an impulsive emotional decision like that?”

“Textbook,” agreed Liz. “Adults throw tantrums much the same way as children, if you know what to look for.”

“You guys are just trying to make me feel less pathetic,” said Clarice.

“We wouldn’t lie to you about this, hun, especially not when you’re in such misery,” said Trudy. “Just think about it with that big brain of yours. I think if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll see that maybe you’re not the only one struggling with unexpected feelings.”

Clarice didn’t want to hear the truth of what Trudy was saying, not at that moment. Even though it made her heart soar to imagine, she was still far too fragile and unsure to just fall into this fantasy that Harrison Moore, of all men, was emotionally wrecked over her. It didn’t seem possible that any woman could wreck a man like Harrison.

“I don’t know what to do, guys,” said Clarice in a tired voice. “That Harrison had to make his outburst about a baby, of all things… it’s like this whole thing is one big cosmic joke being played on me.”

“What’s that mean?” asked Sophie.

Clarice hesitated. “When Tanner left, and I told you guys that it was because he cheated, that wasn’t… it wasn’t entirely true. I was too humiliated to tell you the full truth. He hadn’t been unfaithful yet—though there were certainly signs it was headed that way. What broke us was that Tanner suddenly told me one day that he didn’t want to have kids, ever. He used to see a future for it, or at least not shut it down, but I guess… I guess that changed.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” said Sophie.

“I couldn’t stay with him after that because I wasn’t going to close that possibility off,” said Clarice. “I don’t know what kind of mom I would be, if I ever was one, but I wasn’t ready to just say no to that life forever. So I had to break it off.”

“Honey, I can’t imagine how difficult that had to be for you,” said Trudy, tightening her embrace. “Tanner was a useless man. You are far better off without him.”

“I know. I am,” said Clarice. “But now I’m out of the frying pan and into the fire. I have no idea what to do about Harrison. The thought of just getting on that plane back for New York and never seeing him again…” She shut her eyes and shook her head like she was going to be sick. “I can’t do it. Goddamn me, I can’t do it. I don’t know if Harrison’s faking his feelings for me or not, but… I know that even though I was furious at him, I was also overwhelmed with gratitude that Harrison would be so willing—excited, even—about having a child with me.”

The girls exchanged glances that were filled with many emotions, chiefly among them love and worry.

“Clarice,” said Trudy. “Look, I’m going to tell you something, even though part of me is extremely against the idea of what might happen if I do.”

Clarice sniffled and met her best friend’s gaze. “What?”

She looked at Liz and Sophie, and said, “We have never seen you so happy as you have been here. We can all see it on you. Even when Harrison’s not around, it’s like he’s just… infected you with sunshine. You look like you’re in high school all over again.”

“It’s nauseating, if I’m being honest,” added Liz with a smirk.

Clarice raised an eyebrow. “What are you saying?”

Trudy shrugged. “Maybe none of this is a bad thing, hun. If Harrison makes you so happy that you don’t want to leave this place… and if
you
make
him
so happy that he can’t stand the thought of losing you, either… maybe it’s time you guys admitted that and see what happens.”

Clarice instantly shook her head. “This isn’t a goddamn movie; I can’t just run off with a suave rich guy. There’s no way this is happening. This is just a sick joke.”

“That’s loser talk,” said Liz. “And you are not a loser.”

“Remember when we were in high school and they wouldn’t let girls try out for the wrestling team, and you gathered all that attention and support until they did?” said Sophie. “That’s a movie plot, right there, Clarice.”

“Or that one weekend in the city when we ran into Chaz Mercury at the Snakebite Club, and spent the whole weekend drinking on his tour bus?” said Liz with raised eyebrows and a smile. “That’s definitely a movie plot.”

“Crazier shit has happened,” agreed Trudy. “The world is a weird, weird place. But you know goddamn well that you are a catch of a woman, and it makes perfect sense to the three of us why Harrison’s head over heels for you. Would it be the end of the world if you believed it, too?”