PRIVATE: A Military Romance Novel (Military Men Book 2) (11 page)

“Get back inside and help the others,” I ordered Simon and Hamilton. They obeyed and took off. I prayed I wasn’t sending them to their death.

I pushed Kincaid’s hair out of her face and made sure she was comfortable. I couldn’t leave her alone while she was unconscious but I hated ordering my men to risk their lives inside while I remained outside. I was pulled in two different directions and told myself I would ordinarily stay with an injured officer no matter who they were. A part of me knew that was a lie.

More minutes ticked by, moving interminably slow. My chest clenched and felt like I was having a heart attack while I prayed for the men to return, for Kincaid to wake up, and everything else that seemed impossible at that moment.

An explosion rocked the building once more. This one was different to the others, it was the final straw. I stood by uselessly watching while it gave a final groan and collapsed in on itself.

The whole building was gone in a matter of seconds. There was nothing left except a gaping hole where it had stood only moments ago.

My whole world stopped.

There were twenty soldiers in that building and an unknown amount of captives in the basement. They were all underneath the crumbled pile of debris as it pressed down on everything in its way.

I ran toward the building, hating myself for leaving Kincaid but desperate to do anything I could for my team. I should have been with them, called them back from the mission before it was too late. I’d failed them all in the worst possible way.

They were all gone.

Chapter 12

Sasha

҉ ҉ ҉ ҉ ҉ ҉

My head hurt as I blinked my eyes open. I could see the sky but it was too bright and only made the ache worse. I closed them again and hoped things would be better the next time I tried to see.

The memory of everything that had happened crashed into my conscious thoughts. The screams, the explosion, all the noise as the ceiling collapsed on me. I had followed the screaming voices and they had led me to the back of the building where I didn’t remember much else.

I had no idea how I’d made it outside to lie on the warm ground but I was grateful for it anyway. My head swam as I sat up, the pain making a comfortable home in my temples.

It was impossible not to notice the gap where the target building used to stand. I couldn’t see any other soldiers and my thoughts instantly went dark. Surely they couldn’t all have been in the building when it fell? Everyone was running out when I last saw them. They had to have made it out.

Rafter was one of them. I hadn’t seen him leave but everyone was going, he would have been one of them. He just had to be.

But the building was gone and I was all alone in the middle of a warzone. The Taliban knew we were coming and had laid a trap for us. We’d gone in and played right into their game.

I had to grip the chain-link fence to make it to my feet. Even then I felt unsteady as the world spun around me. My worst fears were being realized as I stared at the crumbled remains of the building.

Nobody could have survived that damage, not if they were within the walls when it happened. Rafter was gone, they were
all
gone. The same men I had sat with at breakfast that morning, the guys who had hunkered down in the truck with me, the same ones who had gone to Afghanistan to make a positive difference in the world.

All gone.

How did somebody go on after that?

My feet were clumsy as I stumbled forward. I gripped the fence for as long as I could but it didn’t extend over the road. I tried to focus on putting one foot in front of the other. There may have been some survivors, people trapped that needed my help.

It felt like all the air was being sucked out of my lungs and my heart was being held in a vise but I kept going. I was a soldier, a member of the US Military and I would do my duty. I would make them all proud.

The ground floor of the building was largely standing, the floors above nestled into the walls like Russian nesting dolls. Five stories all squished together in the same area that used to hold only one floor.

It was eerily quiet while I moved, like the whole word had fallen into silence while mourning the dead that had lost their lives. I wondered which of them had saved my life and got me out before the tragedy unfolded. I guessed I would never know.

I had to keep moving, I couldn’t collapse now when somebody might be relying on me. It was time to step up, prove why I deserved to be there. Just one step after another.

The corner of the building was only a few steps away, giving me an extra boost. I leaned against the bricks as I turned and saw the destruction at the back of the building.

I wasn’t alone anymore.

They were all there, my comrades in arms. Exhausted, covered in dust, and helping what looked like the captives they’d rescued. The screams that I had followed must have belonged to them, my instincts had been right.

I couldn’t focus on anything except scanning the faces of those I knew, searching for the one that I really needed to see above all.

Rafter was in the middle of it all, exhausted and triumphant. He was cradling a baby in the crook of his arm while speaking to a woman dressed in filthy brown rags. The child was naked and his chubby face was streaked with the remnants of tears.

We locked eyes for a moment, his registering surprise while mine could only convey relief. He handed the child back to his mother and headed in my direction. I had to fight the urge to run for his arms and never leave them.

I could hardly believe it was really him, even when he was standing in front of me. “Are you okay, Kincaid?”

“Just a little woozy. Is everyone here?”

“We lost Tate.” Rafter’s head hung in shame, even though it wasn’t his fault. “We found him in the debris, he was too close to an explosion. There was nothing we could have done for him, he was already gone.”

“He’ll get a hero’s funeral. He died serving the country he loved.” I’d only spoken to Tate a few times, I never knew what his first name was. It didn’t make his loss any less painful. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. We got them all out. The bastards left two dozen women and kids in the basement to die. They locked them in, even when they planned on blowing up the whole building.”

I hated them. I hated the Taliban and everything they stood for. The anger surged through my blood and made it boil. It was a reminder of just how important the job we were doing was.

“Some of them were the same age as my daughter,” Rafter continued. “I couldn’t stop thinking of her when we got them out. If anything like this happened to her…” He let his words trail off but his clenched fists finished his sentence.

If anyone hurt his daughter like that, he would kill them. Every single last one. I could easily imagine how protective of his daughter he was. It was sweet to find that quality in a man. Chloe was a very lucky little girl, she would always have her daddy to keep watch over her.

Rafter took a breath before he turned around to address his troops. “We need to get back to base. Ridley, choose a friend and go get the truck.”

Ridley moved straight away, pointing at Short as he moved. Looking at all the women that had been held by the Taliban, I couldn’t imagine how scared they were. They’d been through so much and now they would have to be processed by the US Military before being released to locals for ongoing assistance.

I helped gather them together, unable to communicate with them in their native language. I’d tried to learn Dari once but had failed miserably. I’d never done well in Spanish class so I didn’t hold high hopes for learning another language in the first place.

The truck ride back was somber and quiet. When we unloaded, I volunteered to help with the captives and stayed with them for the whole process. They would stay on base tonight and then be handed over to the locals tomorrow. They had a difficult time ahead of them.

It wasn’t until dinnertime that I saw Rafter again. He was seated at a table with all his closest comrades. Watson, Simon, and Sampson all sat around as they let off some steam.

I sat with some of the men from our mission today. Nobody talked about what had happened, everyone choose to repress those particular memories. I was one of them, happier to discuss the latest football results than the comrade we’d lost.

Every time I looked over, Rafter was staring back at me. I longed to go to him. When I was in his arms everything just felt safer, like we would be able to go home one day and forget about all the atrocities we’d seen firsthand. I got the feeling it would never be that easy.

He was incredibly hot, even wearing an expression of weariness and fatigue. I knew underneath his uniform he would be all knotted muscle and tight skin. I’d felt the bulge in his pants, I knew for sure he was well endowed. His cock would fill me, giving me untold levels of pleasure.

I wanted him so badly. With every part of me I yearned to be with him. Being so close but so far apart was like torture. If he could see all the incredibly hot images in my head he wouldn’t be able to think of anything else either. I longed for the security and comfort he would be able to give me.

A million schemes and plans to make him mine flitted around my thoughts. All of them were quickly discarded. There was a reason we shouldn’t be together and they were all vital. Our decision could cost lives and neither of us wanted to lose any more people.

But, God, why did he have to be so gorgeous? He oozed sex appeal from every pore on his skin. He silently called me to him like a moth to a flame. Even with my wings flapping in the opposite direction, the pull was there.

If I closed my eyes, I was certain I would still be able to feel him. He’d given me a taste in the rec room and it fueled a relentless hunger for more. I wanted his hands, his lips, his tongue, his cock. I wanted it all.

The mess hall had suddenly grown very hot, I needed to fan myself in order to calm down. My hormones were firing, spurring my pussy into a wet slickness that throbbed for one man only.

Rafter caught me staring at him. This time he didn’t look away so quickly. His eyes lingered on mine just that moment too long for it to be an offhand glance. Was he thinking the same thoughts as me? It didn’t matter, we’d already made our decision.

I couldn’t stand being in the mess hall any longer. I was going to burst into flames if I remained there for a second more.

Pushing to my feet, I purposefully avoided looking at Rafter and headed for the door. It was going to be a long night in my bunk in my heightened state. I tried to conjure up some unsexy thoughts but his strong arms pushed them all away as he dominated my mind.

The base was too big as I stalked across it. I was paranoid everyone I passed could read my thoughts. When someone tapped me on the shoulder I jumped from the sudden touch and spun around.

Only to come face to face with Rafter. All thoughts merged into panic as I stared at him. Even after a day out in the field he smelled like he was freshly showered. I couldn’t speak from the assault on my senses from taking him all in.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“Back to my dorm,” I replied, trying to work out why we were having the conversation. He should have still been in the mess hall.

He faltered for a moment, his eyes flicking to the floor and looking everywhere except at me. Tension crackled in the air between us, a physical response from being so close together.

I was breathless with anticipation while I waited for him to speak.

Chapter 13

Sasha

҉ ҉ ҉ ҉ ҉ ҉

“Did you want something?” I prompted. It was killing me having Rafter there but not talking. I couldn’t read him well enough to know what he wanted

His gaze returned to mine, his green eyes so familiar to me now I could recognize them in the dark. He answered by grabbing my wrist and pulling me along. I trailed after him as he tugged me into the meeting room and closed the door.

My heart was about to jump right out of my chest. It beat a rhythm too hard, pounding in my ears like a drum. I wasn’t going to survive this deployment with Rafter sending my pulse into a frenzy every time he looked at me.

He suddenly snaked an arm around my waist and pulled me against him. Our bodies smashed together with the passion of a pair of wild animals. I didn’t have time to process what was happening before Rafter’s lips were on mine, wiping away all of my thoughts.

His lips were exactly as I remembered them, hard and soft all at the same time. I opened my mouth to him, our tongues frantically dancing together like there was no tomorrow.

I lost track of all the reasons why we shouldn’t be doing what we were. After all, when something feels so incredibly good, why wouldn’t you want to do it? Nothing that felt that good could possibly be bad.

Rafter suddenly pulled back, making me ache for him again. He hesitated a moment, his eyes revealed nothing about what he was thinking.

He let go of my waist and headed toward the door. He couldn’t leave me again without at least an explanation. My emotions were wavering between hurt and anger. More than anything I just wanted him to stay.

His hand lingered on the doorknob as he faced the door. He couldn’t even face me to tell me he was going. Why was he dragging it out when he so clearly wanted to go?

A
click
sounded in the silence between us. He’d locked the latch. As he turned around and leaned on the door, his eyes sparked with intent. “I can’t get you out of my head.”

“I thought I was the only one having problems with that,” I said, my voice breathy as it hitched in my throat.

“You’re not.”

“What do we do about it?”

He didn’t answer with words. He answered with actions. In two steps he closed the distance between us and pulled me against him. One hand made its way to the buttons on my shirt, starting to undo them just as he had before. My breasts heaved as they strained against the fabric, begging to be unleashed.

Resting my hands on his hips, they were itching to sneak down to his cock so I could feel it pressing hard against the fabric one more time. If he was even half as horny as I was, he would already be hard. I wanted to know for sure but couldn’t risk interrupting his progress on my buttons.